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The Age Old Question - Settle your disputes with the opinion of the majority TODAY!
Faynor
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Hello everybody!!! I come to you with... a question
Once upon a time, there were three brothers. Who were also Gods. Whatever. Their names were Poseidon, Zeus, and Hades. You know the drill. They killed their dumb father and then played rock paper scissors to figure out who got what in the aftermath. Zeus got the skies, Poseidon got the ocean, and Hades got the underworld.
Now, here's where you come in
Gary and his entire family are full of idiots, and they think Poseidon got the shit end of the deal. POSEIDON CONTROLS THE OCEAN. THERE IS A TON OF COOL SHIT THERE. Hades is in the fucking basement of the Earth. It's cold and gross and probably doesn't have that great of an internet connection.
Solve my dispute, forum. And put forth others to solve! END YOUR ARGUMENTS NOT LATER, BUT NOW.
Because the majority is always right???
Once upon a time, there were three brothers. Who were also Gods. Whatever. Their names were Poseidon, Zeus, and Hades. You know the drill. They killed their dumb father and then played rock paper scissors to figure out who got what in the aftermath. Zeus got the skies, Poseidon got the ocean, and Hades got the underworld.
Now, here's where you come in
Gary and his entire family are full of idiots, and they think Poseidon got the shit end of the deal. POSEIDON CONTROLS THE OCEAN. THERE IS A TON OF COOL SHIT THERE. Hades is in the fucking basement of the Earth. It's cold and gross and probably doesn't have that great of an internet connection.
Solve my dispute, forum. And put forth others to solve! END YOUR ARGUMENTS NOT LATER, BUT NOW.
Because the majority is always right???
do you wanna see me eat a hotdog
Faynor on
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Without challenge there is nothing, and in nothingness there is only gloom. In such a state, the difference between absolute power and absolute powerlessness is undetectable. During this dark era, there arose three powerful mortals - Bane, Bhaal, and Myrkul - who lusted after the power Jergal wielded. The trio forged an unholy pact, agreeing that they would dare to seek such ultimate power or die in the attempt. Over the length and breadth of the Realms they strode, seeking powerful magic and spells and defying death at every turn. No matter what monster they confronted or what spells they braved, the three mortals emerged unscathed at every turn. Eventually the trio destroyed one of the Seven Lost Gods, and they each seized a portion of his divine essence for themselves. The trio then journeyed into the Gray Waste and sought out the Castle of Bone.
Through armies of skeletons, legions of zombies, hordes or noncorporeal undead, and a gauntlet of liches they battled. Eventually they reached the object of their lifelong quest - the Bone Throne. "I claim this throne of evil," shouted Bane the tyrant. ''I'll destroy you before you can raise a finger," threatened Bhaal the assassin. ''And I shall imprison your essence for eternity," promised Myrkul the necromancer. Jergal arose from his throne with a weary expression and said, "The Throne is yours. I have grown weary of this empty power. Take it if you wish - I promise to serve and guide you as your seneschal until you grow comfortable with the position."
Before the stunned trio could react, the Lord of the Dead continued, "who among you shall rule?" The trio immediately fell to fighting amongst themselves while Jergal looked on with indifference. When eventually it appeared that either they would all die of exhaustion or battle on for an eternity, the Lord of the End of Everything intervened. "After all you have sacrificed, would you come away with nothing? Why don't you divide the portfolios of the office and engage in a game of skill for them?" asked Jergal. Bane, Bhaal, and Myrkul considered the god's offer and agreed. Jergal took the heads of his three most powerful liches and gave them to the trio that they would compete by bowling the skulls. Each mortal rolled a skull across the Gray Waste, having agreed that the winner would be he who bowled the farthest.
Malar the Beastlord arrived to visit Jergal at this moment. After quickly ascertaining that the winner of the contest would get all of Jergal's power, he chased off after the three skulls to make sure that the contest would be halted until he had a chance to participate for part of the prize. Bane, Bhaal, and Myrkul again fell to fighting, as it was obvious their sport was ruined, and again Jergal intervened. "Why don't you allow Lady Luck to decide so you don't have to share with the Beast?"
The trio agreed, and Jergal broke off his skeletal finger bones and gave them to the players. When Malar returned form chasing the skulls, he found that the trio had just finished a game of knucklebones. Bane cried out triumphantly, "As winner, I choose to rule for all eternity as the ultimate tyrant. I can induce hatred and strife at my whim, and all will bow down before me while in my kingdom." Myrkul, who had won second place, declared, "But I choose the dead, and by doing so I truly win, because all you are lord over, Bane, will eventually be mine. All things must die - even gods."
Bhaal, who finished third, demurred, "I choose death, and it is by my hand that all that you rule Lord Bane will eventually pass to Lord Myrkul. Both of you must pay honor to me and obey my wishes, since I can destroy your kingdom Bane, by murdering your subjects, and I can starve your kingdom, Myrkul by staying my hand." Malar growled in frustration, but could do nothing, and yet again only the beasts were left for him. And Jergal merely smiled, for he had been delivered.
powers over water
can command fish
Steam
having to constantly pay attention to humans and animals and their stupidity
i can't deal with that shit for a day, let alone forever
Steam
it could be but also jack isn't that big a nerd
I'm very confused by this
Piss her off and she will pull a Lorena Bobbitt on you.
did any of those three gods have a rough deal and if so, which one(s)
Steam
I hope this is is a fake post.
when zeus, poseidon, and hades divvied up god-domains, which one got owned the most?
Zeus obviously won because he's like King of the Gods and stuff
poseidon obviously got owned because who the fuck likes the ocean, it's basically a big garbage can at this point
Steam
hades was voiced by james woods
Good Post Smart Hero
do i have to
well Poseidon got a lot of inclement weather and Zeus just turned into a goose and raped a lot of really easy human women
Hades got millions of damned souls to command as he pleases
I don't see why this is a particularly difficult decision
but R.A. Salvatore is a hack
he didn't invent it
there's plenty of other FR stories & mythos that he didn't write
see this is what I'm saying but FAYNOR thinks that hades got owned
all 3 of them had to deal with us and animals
so they all had it pretty rough
Steam
I would but the glare is blinding
a picture I found on the internet
No I haven't picked up NWN2 I shoulda during the holiday sale but I didn't
oh well