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The Paul the Fundamentalist (TL;DR)
Kevar
regular
regular
Tonight, I communicated with a fundamentalist named Paul. Why he was up late on Saturday when Church is fresh and early in the morning, I don't know, but I was glad for his company. So glad, I invited him to a chat room along with Drizzt and Non-Existent Freezer. Stuff happens. Oh, and we discovered that he's gay.
I removed the numbers from his username to prevent harassment. Some of these come from personal IMs, others from the chat room.
thepaul = private conversation
ThePaul = chatroom
RenegadeDrizzt: what do you think of illegals, brother paul?
ThePaul: They need to go back to Mexico.
thepaul: I've always loved studying the Constitution and the Bill of Rights
thepaul: I wanted to be President back when I was a little lad, in fact
thepaul: But in a post 9/11 world, and an invasion by illegals, it's too hard of a job
ThePaul: but there are ZERO peaceful ISLAMISTS
RenegadeDrizzt: The minority
RenegadeDrizzt: I do not approve of genocide in any way shape or form
RenegadeDrizzt: However
RenegadeDrizzt: I think the world would be a better place
RenegadeDrizzt: if they were destroyed
Bizzaro Kevar: Amen!
ThePaul: If there were no Islamists.
ThePaul: I'm part Spanish
RenegadeDrizzt: but look what freeing the slaves has done
ThePaul: And WE were the first to bring slaves into the new world!
ThePaul: If you're going to blame anyone for slavery
ThePaul: Blame us!
ThePaul: Actually a lot of Hispanics are the worry with the illegals thing
ThePaul: I also hate the "multiculturalism" argument
ThePaul: It's lib code for Balkanization
RenegadeDrizzt: I've been seeing a support group for the past two months. I've been displaying homosexual tendencies, and I find myself fantasizing about sinful things. Do you have any advice?
thepaul: We all get tempted with sin
thepaul: Some have more temptations than others
thepaul: NOTE
thepaul: Do not tell anyone this
thepaul: But I felt tempted a few times too
thepaul:I'm not like going out and getting porn or being obsessed or whatever
thepaul: But it's a couple times
thepaul: I've been able to handle it though.
thepaul: thank God.
RenegadeDrizzt: personally I would've just destroyed Martin Luther King if I would've known that it would've created history months
RenegadeDrizzt: just joking
ThePaul Hah.
Bizzaro Kevar: Ho ho ho
ThePaul: He'd probably be against such an idea
ThePaul: if he knew what it would cause
ThePaul: it's that they are FORCED to learn Spanish in some cases
ThePaul: i have no problem with learning about different languages or cultures
RenegadeDrizzt: I was forced to learn Spanish
RenegadeDrizzt: from a lady
ThePaul: just do it of YOUR OWN FREE WILL
RenegadeDrizzt: who couldn't LEARN ENGLISH
RenegadeDrizzt: SHE SCREWED UP HER TENSES
RenegadeDrizzt: and it made me so mad
ThePaul: Not only that
ThePaul: Look at the "history months"
ThePaul: another case of "multiculturalism"
RenegadeDrizzt: I fear for my future children more than anything
RenegadeDrizzt: look at the crime rate
RenegadeDrizzt: with illegals
ThePaul: yup
Bizzaro Kevar: Paul, brother Cody tells me you've had trouble with homosexulity in the past.
Bizzaro Kevar: Is this true?
Bizzaro Kevar: It's nothing to be ashamed of. We all have those feelings sometimes
ThePaul: Well, i've been tempted
ThePaul: But I've ignored them.
ThePaul: Never acted on it
ThePaul: Just presented occasionally
ThePaul: And that's the truth
ThePaul: Besides, too many princessas to even think about that stuff!
Bizzaro Kevar: What kinds of thoughts?
Bizzaro Kevar: Specifically?
ThePaul: I don't want to be rude
ThePaul: But
Bizzaro Kevar: It's okay
Bizzaro Kevar: We're all adults here
ThePaul: You know.
ThePaul: Personal.
ThePaul: Nothing like sex
ThePaul: Thank God it was something that wasn't a battle
ThePaul: It was just temptation
ThePaul: Kinda like you've never drank, but a beer looks good to you sometimes
ThePaul: But you never actually imbibe.
RenegadeDrizzt: I mean
RenegadeDrizzt: I'm fighting it
RenegadeDrizzt: it is A BATTLE for me
Dance With Merle: Please don't ruin any more vegetables for me.
RenegadeDrizzt: one I'm afraid that I won't be able to conquer
RenegadeDrizzt: I've considered shock therapy
Bizzaro Kevar: Those "scared straight" places helped me a lot.
ThePaul: just pray
ThePaul: trust God
ThePaul: Think about this
ThePaul: There are so many beautiful girls out there that are better than what you are thinking about
RenegadeDrizzt: I tell myself that
RenegadeDrizzt: but I look
RenegadeDrizzt: and I feel empty
RenegadeDrizzt: I am fighting for this
ThePaul: I've got some pics of girls that are MAN
RenegadeDrizzt: show me
RenegadeDrizzt: please
RenegadeDrizzt: HOYL FUCk
RenegadeDrizzt: HE JUST SENT MEP ORN
Bizzaro Kevar: LINK
Bizzaro Kevar: what is it
thepaul: [censored]
thepaul: NO WAIT
thepaul: DO NOT CLICK
thepaul: There's shirtless guys behind her
thepaul: It's no problem for me anymore though
thepaul: I mean, I had the temptations, but never yeilded to them
thepaul:I have an addictive personality
RenegadeDrizzt: Right
thepaul: So if I fell into it It'd be hard as you to get out
thepaul: That's why I thought "I better not take this...it's like taking crack. One sniff and you're in"
I removed the numbers from his username to prevent harassment. Some of these come from personal IMs, others from the chat room.
thepaul = private conversation
ThePaul = chatroom
RenegadeDrizzt: what do you think of illegals, brother paul?
ThePaul: They need to go back to Mexico.
thepaul: I've always loved studying the Constitution and the Bill of Rights
thepaul: I wanted to be President back when I was a little lad, in fact
thepaul: But in a post 9/11 world, and an invasion by illegals, it's too hard of a job
ThePaul: but there are ZERO peaceful ISLAMISTS
RenegadeDrizzt: The minority
RenegadeDrizzt: I do not approve of genocide in any way shape or form
RenegadeDrizzt: However
RenegadeDrizzt: I think the world would be a better place
RenegadeDrizzt: if they were destroyed
Bizzaro Kevar: Amen!
ThePaul: If there were no Islamists.
ThePaul: I'm part Spanish
RenegadeDrizzt: but look what freeing the slaves has done
ThePaul: And WE were the first to bring slaves into the new world!
ThePaul: If you're going to blame anyone for slavery
ThePaul: Blame us!
ThePaul: Actually a lot of Hispanics are the worry with the illegals thing
ThePaul: I also hate the "multiculturalism" argument
ThePaul: It's lib code for Balkanization
RenegadeDrizzt: I've been seeing a support group for the past two months. I've been displaying homosexual tendencies, and I find myself fantasizing about sinful things. Do you have any advice?
thepaul: We all get tempted with sin
thepaul: Some have more temptations than others
thepaul: NOTE
thepaul: Do not tell anyone this
thepaul: But I felt tempted a few times too
thepaul:I'm not like going out and getting porn or being obsessed or whatever
thepaul: But it's a couple times
thepaul: I've been able to handle it though.
thepaul: thank God.
RenegadeDrizzt: personally I would've just destroyed Martin Luther King if I would've known that it would've created history months
RenegadeDrizzt: just joking
ThePaul Hah.
Bizzaro Kevar: Ho ho ho
ThePaul: He'd probably be against such an idea
ThePaul: if he knew what it would cause
ThePaul: it's that they are FORCED to learn Spanish in some cases
ThePaul: i have no problem with learning about different languages or cultures
RenegadeDrizzt: I was forced to learn Spanish
RenegadeDrizzt: from a lady
ThePaul: just do it of YOUR OWN FREE WILL
RenegadeDrizzt: who couldn't LEARN ENGLISH
RenegadeDrizzt: SHE SCREWED UP HER TENSES
RenegadeDrizzt: and it made me so mad
ThePaul: Not only that
ThePaul: Look at the "history months"
ThePaul: another case of "multiculturalism"
RenegadeDrizzt: I fear for my future children more than anything
RenegadeDrizzt: look at the crime rate
RenegadeDrizzt: with illegals
ThePaul: yup
Bizzaro Kevar: Paul, brother Cody tells me you've had trouble with homosexulity in the past.
Bizzaro Kevar: Is this true?
Bizzaro Kevar: It's nothing to be ashamed of. We all have those feelings sometimes
ThePaul: Well, i've been tempted
ThePaul: But I've ignored them.
ThePaul: Never acted on it
ThePaul: Just presented occasionally
ThePaul: And that's the truth
ThePaul: Besides, too many princessas to even think about that stuff!
Bizzaro Kevar: What kinds of thoughts?
Bizzaro Kevar: Specifically?
ThePaul: I don't want to be rude
ThePaul: But
Bizzaro Kevar: It's okay
Bizzaro Kevar: We're all adults here
ThePaul: You know.
ThePaul: Personal.
ThePaul: Nothing like sex
ThePaul: Thank God it was something that wasn't a battle
ThePaul: It was just temptation
ThePaul: Kinda like you've never drank, but a beer looks good to you sometimes
ThePaul: But you never actually imbibe.
RenegadeDrizzt: I mean
RenegadeDrizzt: I'm fighting it
RenegadeDrizzt: it is A BATTLE for me
Dance With Merle: Please don't ruin any more vegetables for me.
RenegadeDrizzt: one I'm afraid that I won't be able to conquer
RenegadeDrizzt: I've considered shock therapy
Bizzaro Kevar: Those "scared straight" places helped me a lot.
ThePaul: just pray
ThePaul: trust God
ThePaul: Think about this
ThePaul: There are so many beautiful girls out there that are better than what you are thinking about
RenegadeDrizzt: I tell myself that
RenegadeDrizzt: but I look
RenegadeDrizzt: and I feel empty
RenegadeDrizzt: I am fighting for this
ThePaul: I've got some pics of girls that are MAN
RenegadeDrizzt: show me
RenegadeDrizzt: please
RenegadeDrizzt: HOYL FUCk
RenegadeDrizzt: HE JUST SENT MEP ORN
Bizzaro Kevar: LINK
Bizzaro Kevar: what is it
thepaul: [censored]
thepaul: NO WAIT
thepaul: DO NOT CLICK
thepaul: There's shirtless guys behind her
thepaul: It's no problem for me anymore though
thepaul: I mean, I had the temptations, but never yeilded to them
thepaul:I have an addictive personality
RenegadeDrizzt: Right
thepaul: So if I fell into it It'd be hard as you to get out
thepaul: That's why I thought "I better not take this...it's like taking crack. One sniff and you're in"
Kevar on
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Posts
Now we all know why.
Awesome, paul.
I am listening to the battlestar galactica soundtrack and so i feel the same way
Twitter | Facebook | Tumblr | Last.fm | Pandora | LibraryThing | formspring | Blue Moon over Seattle (MCFC)
What is, in this post 9/11 world with all these immigrants?
even better a chatlog with a nincompoop that is down for islamist genocide
boy oh boy the comedy wheels is greased and rollin' tonite!
that fell squarely in the "DR" half of my tl;dr reaction to this thread
They cast a shadow like a sundial in the morning light. It was half past 10.
Homoslavia
small nation
on the island of Lesbos
Taking our welfare. And all our women.
Faggots.
some whiney faggot is going to join the forums
and he's going to search for the word "faggot" to judge if we are homophobic or not
he will probably find this thread and take it out of any context
and be like "you all hate gays
especially you pony, you homophobe"
i know this will happen because it already has
all of this has happened before
and will again
so say we all
all beating off into my hamburgers at the sight of me
Kaiser Pony: and my dad drilled all this survivalism stuff into my head as a kid
Rainadoo: haha
Rainadoo: wish I could hunt, I've never killed anything and eaten it. :-(
Kaiser Pony: it is an interesting thing
Kaiser Pony: psychologically
Kaiser Pony: at least if you actually think about it as an animal and not jsut
Kaiser Pony: "ghyuk i shot a buck"
Rainadoo: dude don't even get me started
Rainadoo: I wrote 10 pages or so in High school on the topic
Kaiser Pony: the first time i went hunting with my dad i cried
Kaiser Pony: i was really, really upset and felt terrible
Kaiser Pony: i mean, i thought i was prepared for it
Kaiser Pony: my dad had explained it all
Kaiser Pony: but then, when he actually shot a deer, i was not prepared for the screaming
Rainadoo: mm
Rainadoo: Does shooting them in the head work fine? I'm not looking for trophies
Kaiser Pony: yeah, but it's hard to hit the head, especially with a bow
Kaiser Pony: much easier to hit the chest or flank
Rainadoo: do you run up and end it? like throat or shot in the brain?
Kaiser Pony: when my dad shot the deer, he hit it in the stomach, and it was laying on the ground and screaming
Kaiser Pony: and i was flipping out
Rainadoo: haha, geez
Kaiser Pony: and my dad grabbed me by the shoulders, and he's like "now listen. we could just let it bleed out. It might take a few minutes. It'd be safer, and it's often what animals do. But we aren't going to do that. We aren't going to let it suffer. That is what makes us better."
Kaiser Pony: and then he handed me a machete and was like "now you learn why mercy is the value of man."
Rainadoo: :O
Kaiser Pony: one swift chop to the neck
Kaiser Pony: and it's over
Kaiser Pony: he made me do it
Kaiser Pony: to make me understand
Kaiser Pony: it's a lesson i won't forget
Rainadoo: pony you're talking like a crazy dude in a movie all sweaty and black and white and holding me by my shoulders and telling me why you just killed a prostitute
Kaiser Pony: hahahahahaha
Rainadoo: dude it's in my brain and I suspect it'll be there for-fucking-ever
Kaiser Pony: so i mean, that's our standard operating procedure
Kaiser Pony: take it down with an arrow or two
Kaiser Pony: finish it with a machete, or your hands if you're trying to take the skin as clean as possible
Rainadoo: dude I am so posting this
Rainadoo: the hunting part
Kaiser Pony: hahahaha
Kaiser Pony: where
Rainadoo: SE somewhere I am gonna find a place
Kaiser Pony: hahahaha ran you are not helping me
fucking parades
it's like how water buffalos travel in herds
weakest in the centre
in the middle of the parades is where you will find the slow ones
they put them on floats to avoid hunters