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How do I decline this job offer gracefully?
Drez
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
I am going to be slightly vague just in case the company in question has ninja assassins query robots that follow me around, searching my every word.
So, long story long:
I have been employed, through an agency, as a contractor at a company that does things. One hiatus of some length that was between six and twelve months notwithstanding, I have been with the company for a few years. As a contractor.
My contract, which was again extended (post-hiatus) multiple times, is set to expire soon.
This set me into a wave of panic and a flurry of action, for being unemployed is the third least fun thing I can think of being.
Now, this company is large, and I have bounced between various groups within a single department that did not really have much to do with my college career. However, being employed trumps pursuing my dream of corporate masturbator, so I asked my manager if he had any leads on anything and I also put some feelers out there with some of the VPs and Ps and whatnot that I successfully networked (or merely "worked") with in the past. Like massive feelers. I'm surprised HR didn't ask me to stop feeling everyone at the company.
I personally thought I was screwed anyway for a variety of reasons, one of which is that I'm the kind of guy that looks at a half-full glass of water and worries that a drought might hit in the next five minutes and that may be the last half-a-glass of water I will ever consume again before perishing. In the end though, I got swarmed by offers. Two of them. Or three but one offer dissapeared like a thing that disappears.
Now what's weird is that one of the offers came about mostly because of my manager's influence, and is within the same group that has extended my contract repeatedly for many years. I have mixed feelings about this group. On one hand, they've been good to me and offered me some stability. On the other hand, they never did get around to permanently hiring me and I kind of feel like they've used me, to an extent, to do work someone mint get paid 3-5x what I get paid to do the same level of work. I'm very, very good at what I do, but I'm not so assertive when it comes to my career.
Then again, I can't blame myself too much for that. The job economy, especially in my field, has been terrible, so latching on to a job was a smart move I think. I'd call it a symbiotic relationship.
Anyway, that offer I mentioned was within this group. Would I take it? Sure. But really, all I saw coming from that was another indefinite amount of time doing temp work at temp wages tempily.
This person apparently spoke to my manager a few times to try to get the wheels in motion but never contacted me. Kind of weird, in my opinion. Especially as it is in a different office in a different state. Still close, but...shouldn't you gauge my interest first?
In the meanwhile, someone else, who I worked with before, contacted me. This is someone I didn't even feel during my massive feelering. I guess it was just serendipity that she called. So anyway, stay with me. First offer was being worked on at this point in the background, but with no direct conversation with me. This person was the first person to directly contact me. Anyway, this person wanted me. The only problem, she was only 80% sure she could get the project approved. This is in a different department entirely, one closer to my college training and interests, with a longer promised project length, AND a serious possibility of going permanent. In fact, I know someone else in that group that did successfully go temp-to-perm.
At this point, that's what I need. So I of course told her I was interested and she said she would try to get me approved.
Two days later, the first offer person contacted me. Now, that offer was for a smaller guaranteed length but I was 100% guaranteed to get it.
Now, I hate stringing people along but I played it Bogart and told this person that I was offered something already and wasn't sure where they were in the process, but could I have a few more days to figure it out because I don't want there to be any hard feelings on any end. The truth is, I didn't want to lock myself out of this job before I knew if the other one was a go, which I needed to wait for approval for first.
Well, that wait ended today. They got the approval.
Clearly, the best thing for me to do is to go where the best growth and stability prospects are. However, my manager did ut himself out there and the other department has been good to me for so many years. And I kind of did string this person along a bit. So, what's the most graceful way of declining the other offer? I assume phone and direct are best. Should I be apologetic? Professional? Flirtatious? Magnanimous? Hire someone to tell the person that I had to flee the country because of my enormous gambling debt and then just play it off when I bump into them again?
The truth is, I've never had to decline a job offer before and I feel especially uncomfortable because Ive known this person and her manager for years. I'm doing what my manager doesn't expect me to do by going to this oth department. Should I say something to him too?
Also...did I play all that wrong? I feel badly about stringing that first offerer along...
So, long story long:
I have been employed, through an agency, as a contractor at a company that does things. One hiatus of some length that was between six and twelve months notwithstanding, I have been with the company for a few years. As a contractor.
My contract, which was again extended (post-hiatus) multiple times, is set to expire soon.
This set me into a wave of panic and a flurry of action, for being unemployed is the third least fun thing I can think of being.
Now, this company is large, and I have bounced between various groups within a single department that did not really have much to do with my college career. However, being employed trumps pursuing my dream of corporate masturbator, so I asked my manager if he had any leads on anything and I also put some feelers out there with some of the VPs and Ps and whatnot that I successfully networked (or merely "worked") with in the past. Like massive feelers. I'm surprised HR didn't ask me to stop feeling everyone at the company.
I personally thought I was screwed anyway for a variety of reasons, one of which is that I'm the kind of guy that looks at a half-full glass of water and worries that a drought might hit in the next five minutes and that may be the last half-a-glass of water I will ever consume again before perishing. In the end though, I got swarmed by offers. Two of them. Or three but one offer dissapeared like a thing that disappears.
Now what's weird is that one of the offers came about mostly because of my manager's influence, and is within the same group that has extended my contract repeatedly for many years. I have mixed feelings about this group. On one hand, they've been good to me and offered me some stability. On the other hand, they never did get around to permanently hiring me and I kind of feel like they've used me, to an extent, to do work someone mint get paid 3-5x what I get paid to do the same level of work. I'm very, very good at what I do, but I'm not so assertive when it comes to my career.
Then again, I can't blame myself too much for that. The job economy, especially in my field, has been terrible, so latching on to a job was a smart move I think. I'd call it a symbiotic relationship.
Anyway, that offer I mentioned was within this group. Would I take it? Sure. But really, all I saw coming from that was another indefinite amount of time doing temp work at temp wages tempily.
This person apparently spoke to my manager a few times to try to get the wheels in motion but never contacted me. Kind of weird, in my opinion. Especially as it is in a different office in a different state. Still close, but...shouldn't you gauge my interest first?
In the meanwhile, someone else, who I worked with before, contacted me. This is someone I didn't even feel during my massive feelering. I guess it was just serendipity that she called. So anyway, stay with me. First offer was being worked on at this point in the background, but with no direct conversation with me. This person was the first person to directly contact me. Anyway, this person wanted me. The only problem, she was only 80% sure she could get the project approved. This is in a different department entirely, one closer to my college training and interests, with a longer promised project length, AND a serious possibility of going permanent. In fact, I know someone else in that group that did successfully go temp-to-perm.
At this point, that's what I need. So I of course told her I was interested and she said she would try to get me approved.
Two days later, the first offer person contacted me. Now, that offer was for a smaller guaranteed length but I was 100% guaranteed to get it.
Now, I hate stringing people along but I played it Bogart and told this person that I was offered something already and wasn't sure where they were in the process, but could I have a few more days to figure it out because I don't want there to be any hard feelings on any end. The truth is, I didn't want to lock myself out of this job before I knew if the other one was a go, which I needed to wait for approval for first.
Well, that wait ended today. They got the approval.
Clearly, the best thing for me to do is to go where the best growth and stability prospects are. However, my manager did ut himself out there and the other department has been good to me for so many years. And I kind of did string this person along a bit. So, what's the most graceful way of declining the other offer? I assume phone and direct are best. Should I be apologetic? Professional? Flirtatious? Magnanimous? Hire someone to tell the person that I had to flee the country because of my enormous gambling debt and then just play it off when I bump into them again?
The truth is, I've never had to decline a job offer before and I feel especially uncomfortable because Ive known this person and her manager for years. I'm doing what my manager doesn't expect me to do by going to this oth department. Should I say something to him too?
Also...did I play all that wrong? I feel badly about stringing that first offerer along...
Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
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Don't feel bad about doing what is best for you, the company will do just fine without you...
Thank your lucky stars that, in this economy, you're in a position to be turning down job offers, and don't feel too bad for the company you're turning down.
The job market being the way it is, I'm sure they'll find someone else without too much trouble.
Basically, I don't want to burn any bridges, especially a bridge I've cultivated for many years.
Instead, you're a contractor, a hired gun, a motherfucking mercenary. You go where the contracts are. You take down bitches and get paid. You owe no one loyalty.
That's what I'd do anyway.
THIS THIS THIS. Now I feel like a pussy for being on salary.
This. Loyalty is bs in this market. Politely, professionally, look out for your own interests, because that is exactly what your old manager did for himself. It's too bad the interests didn't align this time, but they might in the future, and you're super flattered and appreciative of the effort he put out for you, and so on.
Just be courteous and say that while you appreciate the offer, you have decided to take up another offer within the company because you feel it is a better fit. I used to have the same hesitations when I had to decline a job offer (Man I wish I was in a position where I could decline a job offer now
You don't need to be specific about why you take one job over another, and there's plenty of merit in being vague. "This offer just felt like a better fit for me" is fine. If someone really worked hard to get you an offer you're going to turn down, make sure to thank them anyways and get them lunch / Starbucks gift card / etc. Even a small thank you gift tends to cement your appreciation in someone's mind.