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Stan Lee presents: [chat]

1363739414262

Posts

  • stevemarks44stevemarks44 Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    My mom was a hippie and as I got older alluded heavier and heavier that she had smoked a lot of pot in her youth.

    My dad is the polar opposite. Southern Rock, all-state football, drinkin beers and playing rugby with his bros.

    I think this combination has made me a pretty open-minded and well-rounded person.

    Also I just had a conversation with Moses Port. It was terrifying but also awesome because I think he liked me.

    stevemarks44 on
  • NerdgasmicNerdgasmic __BANNED USERS regular
    edited March 2011
    Drez wrote: »
    By the way, The Arrival for Mass Effect 2 arrivals on Tuesday.

    I still need to do LotSB on my cleared save, I've only done it on my vanguard

    Nerdgasmic on
  • Solomaxwell6Solomaxwell6 Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    I'm having a Mountain Dew for the first time in a month or so and it tastes really weird and thick and syrupy.

    Solomaxwell6 on
  • WashWash Sweet Christmas Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Y'see, my mum often told me growing up that she'd be okay with me being gay. But when I realized I was bi it just didn't fit into her binary worldview.

    My mother regularly claimed that bisexuals don't exist.

    Then my sister came out as gay and now all the sudden they do exist but just for women.

    My mom doesn't think bisexuals exist. I told her I was bi and she was all "I don't bi it".
    Okay so she didn't make that pun, but she still doesn't believe me

    Wash on
    gi5h0gjqwti1.jpg
  • Irond WillIrond Will WARNING: NO HURTFUL COMMENTS, PLEASE!!!!! Cambridge. MAModerator mod
    edited March 2011
    Nerdgasmic wrote: »
    Irond Will wrote: »
    Nerdgasmic wrote: »
    Man the Arishok is cool.

    do you know who the voice actor was? i recognized the voice but couldn't place him.

    http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1484330/

    huh. not at all who i thought it was

    Irond Will on
    Wqdwp8l.png
  • ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    I just want this damn cold to go away.

    Thomamelas on
  • Solomaxwell6Solomaxwell6 Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Y'see, my mum often told me growing up that she'd be okay with me being gay. But when I realized I was bi it just didn't fit into her binary worldview.

    My mother regularly claimed that bisexuals don't exist.

    Then my sister came out as gay and now all the sudden they do exist but just for women.

    My mom doesn't think bisexuals exist. I told her I was bi and she was all "I don't bi it".
    Okay so she didn't make that pun, but she still doesn't believe me

    You're either straight or you hate Jesus, there is no third option.

    Solomaxwell6 on
  • Hi I'm Vee!Hi I'm Vee! Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C E Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    I think my mother believes my bisexuality is just a phase.

    I don't really talk to her about it that much, but it came out in a conversation wherein she was berating me for having no direction or focus in my life and decided to toss in "which is probably where this whole bisexuality thing comes from too" which was fantastic let me tell you.

    Hi I'm Vee! on
    vRyue2p.png
  • Dread Pirate ArbuthnotDread Pirate Arbuthnot OMG WRIGGLY T O X O P L A S M O S I SRegistered User regular
    edited March 2011
    My mom knows I'm bi and I told her a vague, sketchy account about my ex and I and she has extrapolated something pretty close to the truth out of it.

    So now she thinks I am a swinger who will fuck all my close friends and its fucking awful.

    Dread Pirate Arbuthnot on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Irond Will wrote: »
    Drez wrote: »
    Irond Will wrote: »
    Drez wrote: »
    Irond Will wrote: »
    i don't really see that as the same thing. holding hands or basic affectionate gestures are appropriate to polite society, and i would include gay dudes holding hands in public as being under that umbrella.

    talking explicitly about sexual acts or encounters in mixed company is inappropriate and disrespectful whether you're straight or gay or a swinger or whatever else.

    Will, the problem is in the phrase "social niceties," which is ambiguous and doesn't have a universal definition. I mean, what is a social nicety to you is not necessarily a social nicety to someone else, and you might be personally accepting of some public behaviors that others might not - I guarantee you there are some people that find even holding hands in public to be beyond the pale.

    I mean, you can only really judge by your own compass, but those compasses are not necessarily synchronized among all of society.

    edit: In other words, you can't please everyone. Shouldn't really try to. Though I would agree there are some universal limits. You shouldn't bend your girlfriend over your Applebee's booth and start fucking her in front of everyone else, for instance. I think we can all agree on that. (Unless she's really hot.)

    it's true that people are going to have different standards and probably always have. i get the sense that the very concept of "politeness" is kind of under fire or being dismissed by groups who i kind of see as radical individualists, sometimes on this board. it strikes me that some of the these people are putting forward the position that free expression should be unfettered by social convention in as broad an arena as possible.

    probably one of the reasons that i kind of cling to and advocate for somewhat stricter and more universal social standards is that i see that kind of nihilism as socially destructive and ultimately destroys the ability to successfully communicate. social standards exist so that we can successfully live among other people.

    I started to type up a big post here because I think there's a lot to say about social norms but I don't think I really want to go into it all here. I think, by and large, social norms are either arbitrary or semi-arbitrary. For instance, "don't wear hats indoors" is totally arbitrary, at least in modern application. "No elbows on the dinner table" is semi-arbitrary because one could make a case that technically elbows could damage a dinner table, but it's pretty unlikely to happen unless your forget to take your bladed gauntlets off before sitting down to eat (hell, maybe that's where the rule came from).

    When you start talking about sex, well, think about a world where everyone spoke about sex publicly. Would that world be fundamentally worse than this one? It would be different, and I don't claim to be able to predict either the ramifications of that society, or what that aspect of society might communicate about a society that acts that way. But I can't dismiss it as being fundamentally worse. So, in a way, an aversion to public displays of affection, or sex as a common topic, or bowel movements, is somewhat arbitrary. You can't really be faulted, though, for harboring these aversions because they developed as a part of your upbringing and adult life within these arbitrary social norms. So even though they are primarily arbitrary, they are also inherently personal.

    So my opinion toward politeness and social norms is that we should try to respect each other as much as possible, especially in public, but we should also not put too many limiters on each other if we can help it. A balance between freedom and politeness - not too far in either direction. And where that line is, is totally fluid and contextual. As someone else said, two people talking about sex in private is totally different from a bunch of bros sitting around the bar in Chilis shouting out sex and poop stories.

    well, i agree that most social rules are fundamentally arbitrary and that other sets of equally arbitrary rules could be generally substituted with no ill effects.

    but i also think that arbitrary rules are necessary to a cleanly-functioning society. by way of analogy, i'd cite traffic rules. there's no reason why people couldn't drive on the left side of the road, and in societies where they do it works just fine. but unless everyone is following the same set of arbitrary rules, it's difficult to really get anywhere.

    Fair enough, but I'd say that's only semi-arbitrary. A set of rules for traffic were needed. The decision between left and right was arbitrary, and remains so, but for safety and practicality, adherence to those rules is required for society to function.

    The same cannot be said for wearing hats indoors or, really, talking about sex in public. I don't mean to discount that people have a right to some comfort, but I don't feel that everyone has a right to total comfort in public. I'm just curious if that's how you feel...like, do you feel entitled to zero uncomfortability while in public? I'm not getting at you - I'm just curious. When I go out in public, I expect I won't be comfortable with everything I see and encounter, especially in New York City. I mean...there's just no way that'll ever happen. The question is how much we need to adapt to fit into each others' comfort zones.

    Drez on
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    Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
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  • WinkyWinky rRegistered User regular
    edited March 2011
    I think my mother believes my bisexuality is just a phase.

    I don't really talk to her about it that much, but it came out in a conversation wherein she was berating me for having no direction or focus in my life and decided to toss in "which is probably where this whole bisexuality thing comes from too" which was fantastic let me tell you.

    God, I am so directionless, I just can't decide who I want to fuck with my life.

    Winky on
  • NerdgasmicNerdgasmic __BANNED USERS regular
    edited March 2011
    Irond Will wrote: »
    Nerdgasmic wrote: »
    Irond Will wrote: »
    Nerdgasmic wrote: »
    Man the Arishok is cool.

    do you know who the voice actor was? i recognized the voice but couldn't place him.

    http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1484330/

    huh. not at all who i thought it was

    that's just what the dragon age wiki says

    Nerdgasmic on
  • TavTav Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    I'm pretty sure my parents think I'm gay

    either that or forever alone

    Tav on
  • radroadkillradroadkill MDRegistered User regular
    edited March 2011
    The only thing my mother ever really did to me was chase me around the house screaming from a bible when I told her I wasn't Christian. Now I try to make jokes about it but she gets super embarrassed so I guess that's good?

    That, or she secretly still thinks I'm going to hell and wants to save me but thinks it's a lost cause, I guess.

    radroadkill on
  • Squirminator2kSquirminator2k they/them North Hollywood, CARegistered User regular
    edited March 2011
    My mum would regularly get stoned. She loved her some... weed, I guess? I don't know, I never asked.

    She stopped a few years ago but she started again recently. The pain from her various medical ailments is too much and the pain meds she's on just aren't cutting it. So she gets blazed instead.

    Squirminator2k on
    The Game of Rassilon - a Doctor Who Roleplaying Game podcast
    PortsCenterJump LeadsThe Life Toyetic with Ben and Molly
  • BobCescaBobCesca Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Aldo wrote: »
    I don't think my parental units think I'm gay as much as they think I completely fail in interaction with other humanoids unless I do what they tell me. Like, they're convinced I can't hold a decent conversation and my mom's always super proud when she hears me talk with another humanoid in a serious manner.

    Evidence that proves I actually do have an idea on how to behave is kind of brushed aside whenever either one of them tells me I should partake in such activities as "go out more" or "ask at least one of the girls at work out".

    It doesn't help at all that I haven't had any friends over after I started high school, I guess.

    Well, you managed more than adequately when you came to Birmingham.

    BobCesca on
  • HappylilElfHappylilElf Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Drez wrote: »
    MyDcmbr wrote: »
    That didn't take nearly long enough but I think I'm a little over 100
    Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
    The Persuit of Happyness
    Taken
    Flight of the Navigator
    Star Wars IV-VI
    Bevery Hills Cop 1 and 2
    Cowboy Bebop the Movie
    Princess Mononoke
    Spirited Away
    Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust
    Second Hand Lions
    South Park: Bigger Longer and Uncut
    Team America
    Planes, Trains and Automobiles
    The Great Outdoors
    My Blue Heaven
    Wayne's World 1 and 2
    Alien, Aliens and Alien 3 ...acutally I'm gonna put in Alien Resurrection too because watching it after seeing all the behinds the scenes stuff in the Quadrilogy it's a much more interesting film. :P

    Pirates of the Carribean trilogy (no two and three weren't great overall but it's more Jack Sparrow so I can't help but enjoy them)

    How to Train Your Dragon
    Ghost in the Shell
    Wall-E
    Legend of the Guardians (which was surprisingly enjoyable)
    The Goonies
    Monty Python: Meaning of Life, Life of Brian and The Holy Grail
    Lethal Weapon I-IV
    Braveheart (remember when Gibson was a closet anti-semite? Ah those were the days)
    Batman Begins and the Dark Knight
    Transformers
    Indiana Jones I-III
    Back to the Future series
    Avatar
    District 9
    A Fistful of Dollars
    Last Man Standing
    The Long Kiss Goodnight
    Pulp Fiction
    Kill Bill vol. 1 and 2
    Resivour Dogs
    The Men Who Stare at Goats
    Austin Powers
    Jackie Brown
    Meet Joe Black
    Inglorious Bastards
    Terminator 2
    The Whole Nine Yards
    American Gangster
    American History X
    Ong Bak
    Fight Club
    Blow
    From Dusk 'till Dawn
    Goodfellas
    Casino
    Ocean's 11
    Burn After Reading
    Ghostbusters
    Scrooged
    A Muppet Christmas Carol
    Die Hard and Die Hard with a Vengeance
    American Psycho
    Toy Story
    What Dreams May Come
    Heat
    Serenity
    The Matrix
    X-Men 1 and 2
    Spiderman
    The Watchmen
    Iron Man 1 and 2
    The Incredible Hulk
    Happy Gilmore Mr Deeds and of course Billy Madison
    Ong Bak
    Spaceballs
    Robin Hood: Men in Tights
    Blazing Saddles
    History of the World: Part I
    Patch Adams
    Man on Fire
    The Wrestler


    I could keep going but I'd have probably have to start looking up titles before much longer to make sure I'm getting them right :P

    Yep, you listed at least 4 movies that I should have put on my list but could not remember.

    That's...that's a list of bands.

    Movies, Drez :P

    HappylilElf on
  • Hi I'm Vee!Hi I'm Vee! Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C E Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Dammit, how come I'm only motivated to work on this song when I don't have time to do it?

    Hi I'm Vee! on
    vRyue2p.png
  • WashWash Sweet Christmas Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    I think my mother believes my bisexuality is just a phase.

    I don't really talk to her about it that much, but it came out in a conversation wherein she was berating me for having no direction or focus in my life and decided to toss in "which is probably where this whole bisexuality thing comes from too" which was fantastic let me tell you.

    It's weird when that gets submitted as evidence against some perceived character flaw. You just like to be subversive/ultra liberal/rebellious so that's why you think you're that way.

    Wash on
    gi5h0gjqwti1.jpg
  • ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    My mom knows I'm bi and I told her a vague, sketchy account about my ex and I and she has extrapolated something pretty close to the truth out of it.

    So now she thinks I am a swinger who will fuck all my close friends and its fucking awful.

    Yeah, you'll find this a lot. You just have to kind of deal with it.

    Thomamelas on
  • Squirminator2kSquirminator2k they/them North Hollywood, CARegistered User regular
    edited March 2011
    The worst assumption that a parent... shit, that anyone can make make after one comes out is that you immediately want to put your penis in/wrap your vagina around every single person who happens to be the same gender as you.

    Which is, of course, absolute bollocks.

    Squirminator2k on
    The Game of Rassilon - a Doctor Who Roleplaying Game podcast
    PortsCenterJump LeadsThe Life Toyetic with Ben and Molly
  • Donkey KongDonkey Kong You wouldn't right click a car Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    I will abide by whatever reasonable social expectations there are in the people around me, but I would never deliberately seek out a friendship with a person who couldn't handle frank discussions of sex and pooping. And if they wanted to talk about pooping during sex, I would really want to know what's the deal with that because I think it's just gross.

    Poo is gross. It is way TMI. Gross bodily functions aren't a thing that needs to be discussed. Yeah, everybody poops, I don't need a reminder.

    I disagree. When no one talks about pooping, no one knows what's normal and what isn't. People end up in pain and dealing with serious medical issues on their own just because they have no idea something's wrong. At least with sex, you've got partners and the aggregate of conversations each has had with all their other partners to spread knowledge (among other things).

    Nope. Internet, doctors. I've never had a poop that made me feel the need to talk to a friend about it. Like, fissures, hemorrhoids, that kind of stuff -- that's fine. But when you start telling me about this stinky poop you had after not pooping for two days and it totally coiled in the toilet bowl and it was green and the diameter of your wrist, that's when I start to rethink why I talk to you.

    That's not educational poop talk, that's people enamored by their own poops and wanting to share.

    I'm not advocating detailed accounts of bowel movements. I am advocating leaving the topic open and if people keep sharing gross and uninteresting things, you can tell them that no one cares about how green their poop was after ingesting a large amount of food dye.

    Donkey Kong on
    Thousands of hot, local singles are waiting to play at bubbulon.com.
  • RichyRichy Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Irond Will wrote: »
    jacobkosh wrote: »
    the only time I ever discussed sex with my mom was in high school when every year or so she'd stop the car, sigh, look over at me and tell me that I could tell her if I was gay, she wouldn't mind

    haha

    one of my brothers is kind of shy and was rather unsuccessful with women

    my other brother and i had like a five-year campaign to convince my mom that he was gay

    :lol:

    did you succeed?

    I need to know!

    It would be hilarious if you did :D

    Richy on
  • ElendilElendil Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
  • Irond WillIrond Will WARNING: NO HURTFUL COMMENTS, PLEASE!!!!! Cambridge. MAModerator mod
    edited March 2011
    Drez wrote: »
    Irond Will wrote: »
    well, i agree that most social rules are fundamentally arbitrary and that other sets of equally arbitrary rules could be generally substituted with no ill effects.

    but i also think that arbitrary rules are necessary to a cleanly-functioning society. by way of analogy, i'd cite traffic rules. there's no reason why people couldn't drive on the left side of the road, and in societies where they do it works just fine. but unless everyone is following the same set of arbitrary rules, it's difficult to really get anywhere.

    Fair enough, but I'd say that's only semi-arbitrary. A set of rules for traffic were needed. The decision between left and right was arbitrary, and remains so, but for safety and practicality, adherence to those rules is required for society to function.

    The same cannot be said for wearing hats indoors or, really, talking about sex in public. I don't mean to discount that people have a right to some comfort, but I don't feel that everyone has a right to total comfort in public. I'm just curious if that's how you feel...like, do you feel entitled to zero uncomfortability while in public? I'm not getting at you - I'm just curious. When I go out in public, I expect I won't be comfortable with everything I see and encounter, especially in New York City. I mean...there's just no way that'll ever happen. The question is how much we need to adapt to fit into each others' comfort zones.

    i don't really see it as "keeping people from being uncomfortable" necessarily, but just as a set of coda that let you know how to confidently proceed in social interactions. i do scowl a little when i see people wearing their hats in a restaurant, but it doesn't really make me uncomfortable so much as i see it as a little disrespectful to the establishment and think it kind of speaks ill of the individual in question.

    for the record, i found new yorkers to be surprisingly polite! except for the bus drivers. they were rude as shit.

    Irond Will on
    Wqdwp8l.png
  • Dread Pirate ArbuthnotDread Pirate Arbuthnot OMG WRIGGLY T O X O P L A S M O S I SRegistered User regular
    edited March 2011
    The worst assumption that a parent... shit, that anyone can make make after one comes out is that you immediately want to put your penis in/wrap your vagina around every single person who happens to be the same gender as you.

    Which is, of course, absolute bollocks.

    When you are bi you cannot have friends because your ravenous sexual appetite forces you to be attracted to everyone, I guess!

    Dread Pirate Arbuthnot on
  • PowerpuppiesPowerpuppies Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Drez wrote: »

    Fair enough, but I'd say that's only semi-arbitrary. A set of rules for traffic were needed. The decision between left and right was arbitrary, and remains so, but for safety and practicality, adherence to those rules is required for society to function.

    The same cannot be said for wearing hats indoors or, really, talking about sex in public. I don't mean to discount that people have a right to some comfort, but I don't feel that everyone has a right to total comfort in public. I'm just curious if that's how you feel...like, do you feel entitled to zero uncomfortability while in public? I'm not getting at you - I'm just curious. When I go out in public, I expect I won't be comfortable with everything I see and encounter, especially in New York City. I mean...there's just no way that'll ever happen. The question is how much we need to adapt to fit into each others' comfort zones.

    I feel pretty entitled to be comfortable with everything I see and encounter. I think I'm reasonably tolerant and if you do something I find repulsive I get pretty hacked off. I think with a little courtesy you can avoid offending 85% of people and if you can't be bothered to make that effort I get frustrated with you.

    Powerpuppies on
    sig.gif
  • Donkey KongDonkey Kong You wouldn't right click a car Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Something Super Embarassing That I Hope No One Ever Finds And Listens to And Posts Online.band

    Donkey Kong on
    Thousands of hot, local singles are waiting to play at bubbulon.com.
  • Solomaxwell6Solomaxwell6 Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    The worst assumption that a parent... shit, that anyone can make make after one comes out is that you immediately want to put your penis in/wrap your vagina around every single person who happens to be the same gender as you.

    Which is, of course, absolute bollocks.

    If your vagina is stretchy or loose enough to actually wrap around a person, you have far bigger issues than your parents suspecting you're gay.

    Solomaxwell6 on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Drez wrote: »
    MyDcmbr wrote: »
    That didn't take nearly long enough but I think I'm a little over 100
    Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
    The Persuit of Happyness
    Taken
    Flight of the Navigator
    Star Wars IV-VI
    Bevery Hills Cop 1 and 2
    Cowboy Bebop the Movie
    Princess Mononoke
    Spirited Away
    Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust
    Second Hand Lions
    South Park: Bigger Longer and Uncut
    Team America
    Planes, Trains and Automobiles
    The Great Outdoors
    My Blue Heaven
    Wayne's World 1 and 2
    Alien, Aliens and Alien 3 ...acutally I'm gonna put in Alien Resurrection too because watching it after seeing all the behinds the scenes stuff in the Quadrilogy it's a much more interesting film. :P

    Pirates of the Carribean trilogy (no two and three weren't great overall but it's more Jack Sparrow so I can't help but enjoy them)

    How to Train Your Dragon
    Ghost in the Shell
    Wall-E
    Legend of the Guardians (which was surprisingly enjoyable)
    The Goonies
    Monty Python: Meaning of Life, Life of Brian and The Holy Grail
    Lethal Weapon I-IV
    Braveheart (remember when Gibson was a closet anti-semite? Ah those were the days)
    Batman Begins and the Dark Knight
    Transformers
    Indiana Jones I-III
    Back to the Future series
    Avatar
    District 9
    A Fistful of Dollars
    Last Man Standing
    The Long Kiss Goodnight
    Pulp Fiction
    Kill Bill vol. 1 and 2
    Resivour Dogs
    The Men Who Stare at Goats
    Austin Powers
    Jackie Brown
    Meet Joe Black
    Inglorious Bastards
    Terminator 2
    The Whole Nine Yards
    American Gangster
    American History X
    Ong Bak
    Fight Club
    Blow
    From Dusk 'till Dawn
    Goodfellas
    Casino
    Ocean's 11
    Burn After Reading
    Ghostbusters
    Scrooged
    A Muppet Christmas Carol
    Die Hard and Die Hard with a Vengeance
    American Psycho
    Toy Story
    What Dreams May Come
    Heat
    Serenity
    The Matrix
    X-Men 1 and 2
    Spiderman
    The Watchmen
    Iron Man 1 and 2
    The Incredible Hulk
    Happy Gilmore Mr Deeds and of course Billy Madison
    Ong Bak
    Spaceballs
    Robin Hood: Men in Tights
    Blazing Saddles
    History of the World: Part I
    Patch Adams
    Man on Fire
    The Wrestler


    I could keep going but I'd have probably have to start looking up titles before much longer to make sure I'm getting them right :P

    Yep, you listed at least 4 movies that I should have put on my list but could not remember.

    That's...that's a list of bands.

    Movies, Drez :P

    Did you guys pull a trick on me? I thought he was quoting Tav, who listed bands. Or am I going mental?

    Drez on
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    Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
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  • WashWash Sweet Christmas Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    I will abide by whatever reasonable social expectations there are in the people around me, but I would never deliberately seek out a friendship with a person who couldn't handle frank discussions of sex and pooping. And if they wanted to talk about pooping during sex, I would really want to know what's the deal with that because I think it's just gross.

    Poo is gross. It is way TMI. Gross bodily functions aren't a thing that needs to be discussed. Yeah, everybody poops, I don't need a reminder.

    I disagree. When no one talks about pooping, no one knows what's normal and what isn't. People end up in pain and dealing with serious medical issues on their own just because they have no idea something's wrong. At least with sex, you've got partners and the aggregate of conversations each has had with all their other partners to spread knowledge (among other things).

    Nope. Internet, doctors. I've never had a poop that made me feel the need to talk to a friend about it. Like, fissures, hemorrhoids, that kind of stuff -- that's fine. But when you start telling me about this stinky poop you had after not pooping for two days and it totally coiled in the toilet bowl and it was green and the diameter of your wrist, that's when I start to rethink why I talk to you.

    That's not educational poop talk, that's people enamored by their own poops and wanting to share.

    I'm not advocating detailed accounts of bowel movements. I am advocating leaving the topic open and if people keep sharing gross and uninteresting things, you can tell them that no one cares about how green their poop was after ingesting a large amount of food dye.

    I think we're talking about two different things here. I'm talking about people who think poop is an okay thing to bring up or lead off with in regular conversation, and you're talking about being able to mention medical concerns relating to bowel movements. This topic started off dealing more with the former than the latter.

    Wash on
    gi5h0gjqwti1.jpg
  • BobCescaBobCesca Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Drez wrote: »
    Irond Will wrote: »
    Drez wrote: »
    Irond Will wrote: »
    Drez wrote: »
    Irond Will wrote: »
    i don't really see that as the same thing. holding hands or basic affectionate gestures are appropriate to polite society, and i would include gay dudes holding hands in public as being under that umbrella.

    talking explicitly about sexual acts or encounters in mixed company is inappropriate and disrespectful whether you're straight or gay or a swinger or whatever else.

    Will, the problem is in the phrase "social niceties," which is ambiguous and doesn't have a universal definition. I mean, what is a social nicety to you is not necessarily a social nicety to someone else, and you might be personally accepting of some public behaviors that others might not - I guarantee you there are some people that find even holding hands in public to be beyond the pale.

    I mean, you can only really judge by your own compass, but those compasses are not necessarily synchronized among all of society.

    edit: In other words, you can't please everyone. Shouldn't really try to. Though I would agree there are some universal limits. You shouldn't bend your girlfriend over your Applebee's booth and start fucking her in front of everyone else, for instance. I think we can all agree on that. (Unless she's really hot.)

    it's true that people are going to have different standards and probably always have. i get the sense that the very concept of "politeness" is kind of under fire or being dismissed by groups who i kind of see as radical individualists, sometimes on this board. it strikes me that some of the these people are putting forward the position that free expression should be unfettered by social convention in as broad an arena as possible.

    probably one of the reasons that i kind of cling to and advocate for somewhat stricter and more universal social standards is that i see that kind of nihilism as socially destructive and ultimately destroys the ability to successfully communicate. social standards exist so that we can successfully live among other people.

    I started to type up a big post here because I think there's a lot to say about social norms but I don't think I really want to go into it all here. I think, by and large, social norms are either arbitrary or semi-arbitrary. For instance, "don't wear hats indoors" is totally arbitrary, at least in modern application. "No elbows on the dinner table" is semi-arbitrary because one could make a case that technically elbows could damage a dinner table, but it's pretty unlikely to happen unless your forget to take your bladed gauntlets off before sitting down to eat (hell, maybe that's where the rule came from).

    When you start talking about sex, well, think about a world where everyone spoke about sex publicly. Would that world be fundamentally worse than this one? It would be different, and I don't claim to be able to predict either the ramifications of that society, or what that aspect of society might communicate about a society that acts that way. But I can't dismiss it as being fundamentally worse. So, in a way, an aversion to public displays of affection, or sex as a common topic, or bowel movements, is somewhat arbitrary. You can't really be faulted, though, for harboring these aversions because they developed as a part of your upbringing and adult life within these arbitrary social norms. So even though they are primarily arbitrary, they are also inherently personal.

    So my opinion toward politeness and social norms is that we should try to respect each other as much as possible, especially in public, but we should also not put too many limiters on each other if we can help it. A balance between freedom and politeness - not too far in either direction. And where that line is, is totally fluid and contextual. As someone else said, two people talking about sex in private is totally different from a bunch of bros sitting around the bar in Chilis shouting out sex and poop stories.

    well, i agree that most social rules are fundamentally arbitrary and that other sets of equally arbitrary rules could be generally substituted with no ill effects.

    but i also think that arbitrary rules are necessary to a cleanly-functioning society. by way of analogy, i'd cite traffic rules. there's no reason why people couldn't drive on the left side of the road, and in societies where they do it works just fine. but unless everyone is following the same set of arbitrary rules, it's difficult to really get anywhere.
    Fair enough, but I'd say that's only semi-arbitrary. A set of rules for traffic were needed. The decision between left and right was arbitrary, and remains so, but for safety and practicality, adherence to those rules is required for society to function.

    The same cannot be said for wearing hats indoors or, really, talking about sex in public. I don't mean to discount that people have a right to some comfort, but I don't feel that everyone has a right to total comfort in public. I'm just curious if that's how you feel...like, do you feel entitled to zero uncomfortability while in public? I'm not getting at you - I'm just curious. When I go out in public, I expect I won't be comfortable with everything I see and encounter, especially in New York City. I mean...there's just no way that'll ever happen. The question is how much we need to adapt to fit into each others' comfort zones.

    I know that a rule like "do not wear a hat indoors if you are male" is arbitrary, but for some reason it really annoys me when guys do this. And when it comes to talking about sex in public, I think a lot of it comes to down to the fact that I really don't care about random person A's sex life, and if I can hear them talking about it then I really don't think that is appropriate.

    I don't expect to feel comfortable in every situation, but I really don't think it's wrong for me to expect people to behave in a certain fashion when in public (and I really don't think my expectations are particularly strict or conservative).

    BobCesca on
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    BobCesca wrote: »
    Aldo wrote: »
    I don't think my parental units think I'm gay as much as they think I completely fail in interaction with other humanoids unless I do what they tell me. Like, they're convinced I can't hold a decent conversation and my mom's always super proud when she hears me talk with another humanoid in a serious manner.

    Evidence that proves I actually do have an idea on how to behave is kind of brushed aside whenever either one of them tells me I should partake in such activities as "go out more" or "ask at least one of the girls at work out".

    It doesn't help at all that I haven't had any friends over after I started high school, I guess.

    Well, you managed more than adequately when you came to Birmingham.

    Thanks. :)

    Aldo on
  • stevemarks44stevemarks44 Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    I think my parents are cooler with the notion of bi/homosexuality now that it is becoming more socially acceptable.

    Neither my brothers nor I are gay or bisexual, but when I'd have hypothetical conversations with my parents about, they'd always cite social avenues as their reasons that it would be "upsetting".

    My mom used to say if I was gay it would make her sad, not because there was anything wrong with it, but because she'd want me to know the happiness of getting married or having a child. And that she'd hate to see me be persecuted. This was before gay people adopting and states legalizing gay marriage, so Im sure shed be p cool about now.

    My parents kind of own.

    stevemarks44 on
  • descdesc Goretexing to death Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Do bisexuals poop, or are they too indecisive?

    desc on
  • PowerpuppiesPowerpuppies Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    I don't wear hats but if I did I wouldn't feel any real need to take it off in a restaurant... social norms are different in different places. So if someone came from a more permissive place than I did and did annoying shit, I would forgive them once I learned they came from a place where that was okay, but I would expect them to act as expected as long as they were in my neck of the woods. So if I went to Boston and was wearing a hat I would try to remember to remove it while in a restaurant.

    Powerpuppies on
    sig.gif
  • Squirminator2kSquirminator2k they/them North Hollywood, CARegistered User regular
    edited March 2011
    The worst assumption that a parent... shit, that anyone can make make after one comes out is that you immediately want to put your penis in/wrap your vagina around every single person who happens to be the same gender as you.

    Which is, of course, absolute bollocks.

    When you are bi you cannot have friends because your ravenous sexual appetite forces you to be attracted to everyone, I guess!

    I have a friend who's convinced I'm attracted to him. He's a huge homophobe, but the ironic thing is I think, I think, he might have a crush on me that he refuses to acknowledge.

    Or possibly my powers as the Crush Whisperer only work when people are crushing on people who aren't me.

    Squirminator2k on
    The Game of Rassilon - a Doctor Who Roleplaying Game podcast
    PortsCenterJump LeadsThe Life Toyetic with Ben and Molly
  • Hi I'm Vee!Hi I'm Vee! Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C E Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    MyDcmbr wrote: »
    MyDcmbr wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    i still have an aunt who thinks i'm gay
    Man, your aunt thinks I'm gay just from hearing my voice.

    Side note: I bought the Better Pain Chart... chart, and a Sharkbear 7000% Deadly t-shirt VH.

    :D
    Hi5!

    I think my new favorite Hyperbole and a Half post is the fish story.

    I still "The Party."
    That's the one where they're wolves, right?

    That's a pretty good one, yeah.

    Hi I'm Vee! on
    vRyue2p.png
  • EddyEddy Gengar the Bittersweet Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    I have a friend who's convinced I'm attracted to him. He's a huge homophobe, but the ironic thing is I think, I think, he might have a crush on me that he refuses to acknowledge.

    Or possibly my powers as the Crush Whisperer only work when people are crushing on people who aren't me.

    Isn't this the setup for American Beauty?

    Eddy on
    "and the morning stars I have seen
    and the gengars who are guiding me" -- W.S. Merwin
  • stevemarks44stevemarks44 Registered User regular
    edited March 2011
    Awww yeah Butler, get some.

    stevemarks44 on
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