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Social Entropy++: AWESOME POST in "The Undead Menace and You! NSF56k or Twilight", by Meld

ReginaldReginald Registered User regular
Reginald has reported a post.

Very very good
Post: The Undead Menace and You! NSF56k or Twilight
Forum: Social Entropy++
Assigned Moderators: WhipstitchZombie, Larlar, Bogey, Knob, potatoe, Orikaeshigitae

Posted by: Melding
Original Content:
For too long have we stood idly by and allowed the ones who refuse to die walk among us. Now many of you know of what I speak, for those of you who have been fortunate enough to avoid the touches of undeath, let's review.

Most well know are: Zombies



These guys are slow and rotting. by them selves they are rarely much to worry about. Rarely do they came by themselves however. Generally coming in packs and in the dozens these guys aim to swarm you and add you to their ranks.

Tactics advice: Runt he fuck away. If you can't slashing weapons, fire, and stairs can be your best friends but use with caution. flaming zombies are the second worst type of flaming undead.

Second best known are of course: Vampires



Lot's of types of vampires, but generally they avoid sunlight and sleep under ground. They largely feed on blood and many come packed with mind control and the ability to turns into bats. Super strength and mind control help make this creature deadly but what is the real deal breaker is the fact they retain their intelligence and memory of life.

Tactics advice: wooden stakes might be able to end a vampire but in a fight good luck. some say sliver works, but that's costly. Best advice, live near running water. they can't cross it and you can stand in it with immunity. Stay there until the sun kills them. or when they move to flee from the sun follow them to their liar and stake them!

Next up is something everyone has: Skeletons



Skeletons are just as dumb and weak as zombies, but they have one edge they don't. they're basically immune to all forms attack except from breaking bones. Yeah, bullets basically just wiz by, maybe you'll break some ribs but that is baby shit, these dudes have have knifes and want to introduce you to them.

Tactics advice: Be resilient to knives, either by wearing something stab proof or just having a rhino like hide. some of them may carry clubs but by and large they carry old sharp-ish rust metal weapons. Next best idea is to carry a bludgeoning weapon, mace, bat, car, doesn't matter, just make sure you can shatter bones with it.

With a score to settle it, these are Revenants



Back from the dead, brain bored with the murder so they shot their own leg. These dudes are the fucking undead terminator. Not that they kill other undead creatures, but they have no pity, no remorse, and will absolutely not stop until their target is dead. And then they will crumple into dust leaving you to question your sanity. These dudes don't fuck around and often have every memory they had in life. or just their death, which they relive every moment making them meaner and more pissed off until they kill the people responsible.

Tactics advice: Don't be the person that killed them. Seriously, you're on your own here buddy dude will blow up the moon if it means making you dead. They have no shits to give.

Always hungry for a fight are: Ghouls



Ghouls are typically the reanimated corpse of a dead cannibal, forced to stalk the earth feasting on the dead flesh of humans. feral and insane they scour graveyards for corpses with meat to fill their unending lust for human flesh. commonly mistaken for zombies in recent years, it is worth noting there are a few differences. One Ghouls are quick, zombies are slow. Ghouls eat human flesh, zombies hit you with their fists. These are just some basic differences. There are some who think there are still living ghouls, but they are clearly mad. If such things existed the amount of disease they would ingest alone with kill them. However, if you encounter such a being please bring him to your local monster hunting head quarters so that we may study such a sad being.

Tactics advice: while nimble and insane, most ghouls will slink away from still living people. If forced to fight however they will use their claw like hands and jagged teeth. It is not advisable to fight ghouls with exposed skin, as they they manage to bite you, there is a good chance the disease they carry will kill you, and current studies suggest that even if you were not a cannibal in life, you will join their ranks in undeath.

echoing human life we have: Ghosts



Contrary to popular belief ghosts are not the spirits of the dead, walking the earth looking for some meaning of their life or death as typically that is a revenant. Ghosts are in fact, the memories of people who have a connection to an object or place so strong that it echoes into real space. A person who lived in a house all their live and is murdered there for example will often leave behind a memory which will become a ghost that will stalk the halls forever reliving moments of the victum's life. Understanding that who can not simply just solve the ghost's murder is what is paramount to defeating ghosts.

Tactics Advice: As stated above one can not just simple help the ghost "Move on" as it is just a echo of a memory. However, ghosts can be confronted and defeated with the proper equipment, magic swords, positively charged energy beams and holy water are just a few examples. Also one can simply destroy the object the ghost is attached to, however finding that object can be troublesome.

Final one for this update: Liches



Liches are powerful undead wizards who took to the dark arts to find a form of immortality. They are often responsible for the zombies and skeletons you will find. Why? because they're all powerful dicks. often being hundreds of years old, they grew bored with living forever so now most of them are trying to kill every thing. They combine the elements of a wizard and elements of a skeleton. In all not something you want to mess this.

Tactics advice: if faced with a lich, remember your basic training in combating wizards. While they are more powerful, they still have many of the same faults. It is also important to remember the lich's soul is generally bound to a physical object. If you can find and destroy that it's just a matter of killing the the ultra powerful skeleton wizard and it's job done.

There are more to be discussed here and in the future, but this is just a primer.

Be smart, be vigilant, be alive. Together we can stop this:


from happening again.

Added links

Death Knight

Chapter Two: Equipment

Chapter Three: Your First Hunt

Reginald on


  • Captain CarrotCaptain Carrot Harrisonburg, VARegistered User regular
    edited July 2011
    The object to which the lich's soul is bound is also known as a phylactery. It need not be anywhere near the lich, but count on it being hard to get to. Do not challenge a lich unless you are a certified badass; centuries-old undead wizards powerful enough to transcend mortality do not get that way by being easy to beat.

  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    On the contrary, I would refer you to Case 4183, where in a lich was destroyed by an agent working with local police.

    Though there was several fatalities getting to the Lich its self, The lich its self was defeated by the agent whacking it in the face with a rubber chicken. This confused the lich long enough for an officer to place a large store of C4 explosives in it's chest, and then detonate it.

    The Phlactery was found several blocks away hidden under a dumper and was reportedly run over by a truck blaring "Hells Bells"

    I admit this isn't typical lich removal, but it is comical enough to share.

  • ForarForar #432 Toronto, Ontario, CanadaRegistered User regular
    edited July 2011
    I don't think it counts when the "Lich" is just a redneck hillbilly who finds the fucking Necronomicon in a garbage can and manages to inadvertently stumble through the ritual. "Hey Peggy-Jo-Sue-Anne, c'mere 'n git a look at this here phy... phylyc... glowing shit."

  • chiasaur11chiasaur11 Never doubt a raccoon. Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Hey, Koschei the Deathless, the Lich's Lich died recently. Anything's possible.

    Admittedly, the killer is rumored have been the king of England and/or the legendary immortal ruler of hell and vanguard of the end of all things, but dead is dead.

    Except with liches, I guess. Stupid liches.

  • HenroidHenroid Nobody Nowhere fastRegistered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Isn't there a name for the object Liches are linked to? A phylactasomething?

    Also, this is pretty awesome.

    "Ultima Online Pre-Trammel is the perfect example of why libertarians are full of shit."
    - @Ludious
    PA Lets Play Archive - Twitter - Blog (6/15/14)
  • L|amaL|ama Registered User regular
    edited July 2011

    like the first response in this thread said

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