if you were the star of a cheesy sci fi movie

Avraham

like a sci fi buddy comedy with a hint of social commentary

some friendly alien approaches you and wants to hang out

the alien is not single so unfortunately there will be no makeouts

how would you plan this night out on the town?

Sheri

What in the

Brolo

stealth okcupid thread

godmode

We wouldn't look for trouble...

...but trouble would find us.

Hunter

You're not clever. Stop trying.

Edcrab

Hunter wrote: »

You're not clever. Stop trying.

Man don't say this to a new alien!

He'd fuck right off and never come back and we need that space tourism

We need it

Hunter

Edcrab wrote: »

Hunter wrote: »

You're not clever. Stop trying.

Man don't say this to a new alien!

He'd fuck right off and never come back and we need that space tourism

We need it

We get enough tourism from...

THE MOTHERFUCKING SPACE OLYMPICS! YEAAAH HEAH!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9wBRmy1Iho

CorporateLogo

I'd tell him I don't mind stealing bread from the mouth of decadence

But I can't feed all the powerless when my cup's already overfilled

mensch-o-matic

id be the socially inept guy who stays inside all day on a bunch computers but even though on the outside im jhust a lame nerd in the end its my elite hacking skills that saves the day except for the last part id really just be a useless sack of virtual shit same as ever but IN SPAAAACE

CrossBuster

If I were the star of a cheesy sci fi movie, I assume I'd be an actor. And the aliens would presumably be fictional.

Or did real aliens just happen to land on the set of the movie while we were filming, in which case, why does it matter to this hypothetical that I'm a B-list actor?

Or do you mean "character in" instead of "star of"?

Staleghoti

I would fuck every species I could get my dick into

Peccavi

I'd probably be Megashark.

Maybe Gatoroid

Hunter

Staleghoti wrote: »

I would fuck every species I could get my dick into

Thresher Maw says :winky:

Clint Eastwood

Avraham wrote: »

like a sci fi buddy comedy with a hint of social commentary

some friendly alien approaches you and wants to hang out

the alien is not single so unfortunately there will be no makeouts

how would you plan this night out on the town?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iP6XpLQM2Cs

Staleghoti

gimme dat maw pussy

mensch-o-matic

actually id be an alien and id fuck every human i saw

with my metal, spiked alien lady-dick

mensch-o-matic

even jokingly wanting to fuck an alien is funny because dude, half the shit on EARTH would murder you if you got within ten feet of its fucking zone

getting absorbed by your partner and turned into her dick is a thing that ALREADY HAPPENS HERE why would it be any better on planets with acid for air or w/e

Hunter

mensch-o-matic wrote: »

actually id be an alien and id fuck every human i saw

with my metal, spiked alien lady-dick

So Ke$ha like he posted before.

mensch-o-matic

spiked lady-dicks are probably the least of your worries from fucking ke$ha

Blendtec

Hunter wrote: »

Staleghoti wrote: »

I would fuck every species I could get my dick into

Thresher Maw says :winky:

y halo thar

lostwords

I would be Tits McGee, obligated to have two shower scenes in the movie and ready to run in slow mo at the sight of gross aliens

Squall

you'd think the bioluminescence and grotesque appearance would be enough cool things for anglerfish

but nope gotta have super weird reproduction too

The Geek

Hunter wrote: »

Staleghoti wrote: »

I would fuck every species I could get my dick into

Thresher Maw says :winky:

Nice try, Zarflax.

CrossBuster

mensch-o-matic wrote: »

even jokingly wanting to fuck an alien is funny because dude, half the shit on EARTH would murder you if you got within ten feet of its fucking zone

getting absorbed by your partner and turned into her dick is a thing that ALREADY HAPPENS HERE why would it be any better on planets with acid for air or w/e

Wait, seriously?

Staleghoti

more like her balls

Squall

At birth, male ceratioids are already equipped with extremely well developed olfactory organs that detect scents in the water. The male ceratioid lives solely to find and mate with a female. They are significantly smaller than a female angler fish, and may have trouble finding food in the deep sea. Furthermore, the growth of the alimentary canals of some males becomes stunted, preventing them from feeding. These features necessitate his quickly finding a female anglerfish to prevent death. The sensitive olfactory organs help the male to detect the pheromones that signal the proximity of a female anglerfish. When he finds a female, he bites into her skin, and releases an enzyme that digests the skin of his mouth and her body, fusing the pair down to the blood-vessel level. The male then slowly atrophies, first losing his digestive organs, then his brain, heart, and eyes, and ends as nothing more than a pair of gonads, which release sperm in response to hormones in the female's bloodstream indicating egg release. This extreme sexual dimorphism ensures that, when the female is ready to spawn, she has a mate immediately available.[4] Multiple males can be incorporated into a single female.

Huntera

Clint Eastwood wrote: »

Avraham wrote: »

like a sci fi buddy comedy with a hint of social commentary

some friendly alien approaches you and wants to hang out

the alien is not single so unfortunately there will be no makeouts

how would you plan this night out on the town?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iP6XpLQM2Cs

Better.

Virgil_Leads_You

I would allow this alien to be my interstellar wingman.

Mysst

so is this alien nation or enemy mine we're talking about here?

Abracadaniel

Squall wrote: »

At birth, male ceratioids are already equipped with extremely well developed olfactory organs that detect scents in the water. The male ceratioid lives solely to find and mate with a female. They are significantly smaller than a female angler fish, and may have trouble finding food in the deep sea. Furthermore, the growth of the alimentary canals of some males becomes stunted, preventing them from feeding. These features necessitate his quickly finding a female anglerfish to prevent death. The sensitive olfactory organs help the male to detect the pheromones that signal the proximity of a female anglerfish. When he finds a female, he bites into her skin, and releases an enzyme that digests the skin of his mouth and her body, fusing the pair down to the blood-vessel level. The male then slowly atrophies, first losing his digestive organs, then his brain, heart, and eyes, and ends as nothing more than a pair of gonads, which release sperm in response to hormones in the female's bloodstream indicating egg release. This extreme sexual dimorphism ensures that, when the female is ready to spawn, she has a mate immediately available.[4] Multiple males can be incorporated into a single female.

:[

CrossBuster

Squall wrote: »

At birth, male ceratioids are already equipped with extremely well developed olfactory organs that detect scents in the water. The male ceratioid lives solely to find and mate with a female. They are significantly smaller than a female angler fish, and may have trouble finding food in the deep sea. Furthermore, the growth of the alimentary canals of some males becomes stunted, preventing them from feeding. These features necessitate his quickly finding a female anglerfish to prevent death. The sensitive olfactory organs help the male to detect the pheromones that signal the proximity of a female anglerfish. When he finds a female, he bites into her skin, and releases an enzyme that digests the skin of his mouth and her body, fusing the pair down to the blood-vessel level. The male then slowly atrophies, first losing his digestive organs, then his brain, heart, and eyes, and ends as nothing more than a pair of gonads, which release sperm in response to hormones in the female's bloodstream indicating egg release. This extreme sexual dimorphism ensures that, when the female is ready to spawn, she has a mate immediately available.[4] Multiple males can be incorporated into a single female.

Oh for fuck's sake, nature.

Mortal Sky

I have a Tsutomu Nihei manga lying around somewhere in which humans eventually evolve to that state of sexual dimorphism in a post-post-post-post-post apocalypse that's utterly wiped out everything else besides cockroaches. One of the more fucked up things I've ever read. The only reason I own it is that it's in a large compendium of one-shots by him.

Maybe that's why we don't have an anime thread.

The Otaku Suppository

CrossBuster wrote: »

Squall wrote: »

At birth, male ceratioids are already equipped with extremely well developed olfactory organs that detect scents in the water. The male ceratioid lives solely to find and mate with a female. They are significantly smaller than a female angler fish, and may have trouble finding food in the deep sea. Furthermore, the growth of the alimentary canals of some males becomes stunted, preventing them from feeding. These features necessitate his quickly finding a female anglerfish to prevent death. The sensitive olfactory organs help the male to detect the pheromones that signal the proximity of a female anglerfish. When he finds a female, he bites into her skin, and releases an enzyme that digests the skin of his mouth and her body, fusing the pair down to the blood-vessel level. The male then slowly atrophies, first losing his digestive organs, then his brain, heart, and eyes, and ends as nothing more than a pair of gonads, which release sperm in response to hormones in the female's bloodstream indicating egg release. This extreme sexual dimorphism ensures that, when the female is ready to spawn, she has a mate immediately available.[4] Multiple males can be incorporated into a single female.

Oh for fuck's sake, nature.

And here I was ready to blame Japan, but this just raises it to a whole new level.

thorgot

we would do some crop circles and alien abductions (really just take them to wendy's and feed them some ice cream), but only to people who are already crazy so nobody believes them

see317

I don't know for certain what we'd do. I am certain that the phrase "No, I swear, this is how we shake hands on this planet" would come up with disturbing frequency.

Weaver

Jordyn

Huntera wrote: »

Clint Eastwood wrote: »

Avraham wrote: »

like a sci fi buddy comedy with a hint of social commentary

some friendly alien approaches you and wants to hang out

the alien is not single so unfortunately there will be no makeouts

how would you plan this night out on the town?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iP6XpLQM2Cs

Better.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QTC4x73pKdY

Seriously

CrossBuster wrote: »

Squall wrote: »

At birth, male ceratioids are already equipped with extremely well developed olfactory organs that detect scents in the water. The male ceratioid lives solely to find and mate with a female. They are significantly smaller than a female angler fish, and may have trouble finding food in the deep sea. Furthermore, the growth of the alimentary canals of some males becomes stunted, preventing them from feeding. These features necessitate his quickly finding a female anglerfish to prevent death. The sensitive olfactory organs help the male to detect the pheromones that signal the proximity of a female anglerfish. When he finds a female, he bites into her skin, and releases an enzyme that digests the skin of his mouth and her body, fusing the pair down to the blood-vessel level. The male then slowly atrophies, first losing his digestive organs, then his brain, heart, and eyes, and ends as nothing more than a pair of gonads, which release sperm in response to hormones in the female's bloodstream indicating egg release. This extreme sexual dimorphism ensures that, when the female is ready to spawn, she has a mate immediately available.[4] Multiple males can be incorporated into a single female.

Oh for fuck's sake, nature.

This is what's going to happen to us isn't it

sonova