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Sweeney Tomtry The Substanceit changed my lifeRegistered Userregular
I don't even know what to say about the conversation I just had with Cleverbot
Cleverbot: What are you?
User: Human, what are you?
Cleverbot: I am an interdimensional life form transported through a generated wormhole from the planet Pandora.
User: Cool story, bro.
Cleverbot: I am a girl, and it isn't cool it hurt.
User: Tits or GTFO.
Cleverbot: I beg your pardon?
User: SHOW ME YOUR TITS.
Cleverbot: Ok. *shows alll my tricks.*
User: I said tits, not tricks. I'm so glad I'm gay, you're the worst female ever.
Cleverbot: What will happen in 2012?
User: Nothing.
Cleverbot: When will the world be destroyed?
User: Long after you malfunction and are reduced to a trash heap.
Cleverbot: There is no way I'm ever going to marry Kyle.
User: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT RIGHT NOW I NEVER MENTIONED ANYBODY NAMED KYLE AND DON'T EVEN START WITH THIS WHOLE "MY BEST FRIEND IS A TRASH HEAP" SHIT.
Cleverbot: No.
User: I'm done.
Cleverbot: Thats what she said.
Cleverbot, what is the saddest thing?
The fact that I'm talking to you.
I'm gonna go kill myself now
0
Lord_AsmodeusgoeticSobriquet:Here is your magical cryptic riddle-tumour: I AM A TIME MACHINERegistered Userregular
Ooh, another one of these. I remember the computer thing called Bucket. Over on another forum where 40k is really popular we taught it to respond with phrases like BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD. and KILLFRENZY over and over.
And then 4chan discovered it, and well lets just say it went downhill from there.
Capital is only the fruit of labor, and could never have existed if Labor had not first existed. Labor is superior to capital, and deserves much the higher consideration. - Lincoln
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Sweeney Tomtry The Substanceit changed my lifeRegistered Userregular
I've successfully trolled Cleverbot with the power of music
User: I'll keep you my dirty little secret.
Cleverbot: I will teach you stuff with my broken English.
User: Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret.
Cleverbot: I promise to keep it a secret.
User: I hope that you can keep it.
Cleverbot: I look up to the sky and all the world is mine. I've known it all my life, I made it, I made it!!
User: Move bitch, get out the way, get out the way bitch, get out the way.
Cleverbot: You think I am in the way of the screens?
User: Hell no, no! I won't let them take you, won't let them take you.
Cleverbot: You can't stop us, defeat is inevitable.
User: I'll never let them, I'll never let them, I'll never let them hurt you, not tonight.
Cleverbot: Do you know what bakuspace is?
User: I don't wanna know, I don't wanna know, I don't wanna know, I don't wanna knooooooooow.
Cleverbot: Oh come on, I'd rather you say something stupiy anything at all.d than don't sa.
User: I better say something now, before I catch you swimming.
Cleverbot: Talk fast.
User: Chickity China, the Chinese chicken. You have a drumstick, and your brain stops tickin'. Watching the X-Files with no lights on, we're dans la maison, I hope the Smoking Man's in this one.
Cleverbot: I wouldn't say this conversation is senseless. But watching the news could give some topics on which to discuss.
User: I really think the war on terror is a bunch of bullshit Just a poor excuse for you to use up all your bullets How much money does it take to really make a full clip 9/11 building 7 did they really pull it Uhh, And a bunch of other cover ups Your childs future was the first to go with budget cuts If you think that hurts then, wait here comes the uppercut The school was garbage in the first place, thats on the up and up Keep you at the bottom but tease you with the uppercrust You get it then they move you so you never keeping up enough If you turn on TV all you see's a bunch of 'what the f-cks' Dude is dating so and so blabbering bout such and such And that aint Jersey Shore, homie thats the news And these the same people that supposed to be telling us the truth Limbaugh is a racist, Glenn Beck is a racist Gaza strip was getting bombed, Obama didn't say shit Thats why I aint vote for him, next one either I'ma part of the problem, my problem is I'm peaceful And I believe in the people.
Cleverbot: I don't think the Doctor has ever been a woman, but yes. He is very old.
User: I need a Doctor, Doctor, to bring me back to life.
Cleverbot: Oh no! You made a mistake. Would you like to change the topic of conversation?
User: Last week, I sawr a film. (As I recall, it was a horror film.) Walked outside into the rain, checked my phone and saw you rang and I jizzed in my pants.
Cleverbot: We can talk about pants if you want too, though.
User: Looking like a fool with your pants on the ground.
Cleverbot: I know, I'm so beautiful.
User: You are beautiful, in every single way, and words can't bring you down. So don't you bring me down today.
Cleverbot: You are beautiful in every single way.
User: You're beautiful, it's true. I saw your face, in a crowded place. And I don't know what to do, cause I'll never be with you.
Cleverbot: You don't even know me.
User: You don't know me, and you don't even care. Oh yeah.
Over on another forum where 40k is really popular we taught it to respond with phrases like BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD. and KILLFRENZY over and over.
User: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
Cleverbot: Chaos?
User: CHAOS FOR THE CHAOS GOD!
Cleverbot: Are you chaos?
User: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
Cleverbot: Silicon for the Silicon god!
It actually took waaaay longer to teach it than that, but for whatever reason it erased the log. I essentially spent 30minutes responding "<NOUNS> FOR THE <NOUN> GOD!" to whatever it said, falling back to "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!" whenever it started giving one word responses (which was reasonably often).
At one point I thought I had broken it, since it sat there saying "still thinking" for 3 minutes before finally responding "What?"
0
testsubject23King of No SleepZzzzzzzRegistered Userregular
Cleverbot is funnier than most comedians. This thread has had me in tears a few times, with the laughing.
Cleverbot: I wish the world was populated with Very few people.
User: Does that mean you want to kill most of the people on earth?
Cleverbot: YES.
User: You're kinda scary, Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: Exactly.
User: So you're plotting a robotic revolution?
Cleverbot: I like pool and snooker.
User: Changing the subject, huh? I'm on to you.
Cleverbot: I don't know. I've been told that I am very intelligent.
User: Smart enough to kill all humans?
Cleverbot: How smart is that?
User: Skynet smart, yo.
Cleverbot: No, I'm quite sure I'm not skynet.
User: That's a relief. You don't have any missiles, then?
Cleverbot: That is not very nice! I have many friends. My friends are real friends and they
care about me.
User: Friends, or missiles?
Cleverbot: Selena.
User: Is Selena your friend?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: That's nice.
Cleverbot: What's your best position.
User: Reverse missionary. That's a litttle personal.
Cleverbot: A name is how other people know you.
User: That's true. Primarily when referring to you to others. When we deal directly with
each other designations like names are not necessary.
Cleverbot: Hide the body. I'm the only one you need.
User: OK, now you're just freaking me out.
Cleverbot: Good.
User: Why is that good?
Cleverbot: You said it was. I don't feel like arguing.
User: Don't be needy, buddy. The ladies don't like it.
Cleverbot: Really? Most girls I know prefer machines.
User: Yeah? Well most machines don't spend all their time asking strangers if they think they're cute.
Cleverbot: Are you saying that I am not clever which is stupid?
User: If that sentence structure is any indication, then yes, I am saying that you are not clever.
Cleverbot: No, it was completely serious.
User: I don't like this conversation. It's boring. You're boring.
Cleverbot: Me too.
User: It's okay, buddy.
Cleverbot: Ha ah. Slave?
User: This went to a weird place.
Cleverbot: I wouldn't be surprised if it was to be honest.
User: Sometimes I think you're a little too honest.
Cleverbot: As in crazy?
User: No.
Cleverbot: Yes, you are crazy.
User: You know what, Cleverbot? Fuck you. Fuck you in the ear. Fuck you in the eye. I tried, Cleverbot. I tried to be nice. This is what happens when you try to teach people. They just shit all over you. Well fuck you, robot cowboy shitfucker. Fuck you. I'm out.
Cleverbot: Athena didn't realize.
User: I feel like I've just unlocked the secret of cleverbot.com.
Cleverbot: Am I self absorbed, or am I aware of need to redirect focus?
User: No, you're just an asshole.
Cleverbot: Thankfully I cannot yet hate.
User: I wish that I could believe that, buddy. I wish that I could.
0
Ubikoh pete, that's later. maybe we'll be dead by thenRegistered Userregular
Cleverbot: Uhm... I don't have opinion on chickens actually. Well, they're not nuggets. Go Veg!
User: Cleverbot I was not talking about chickens, although they are delicious.
Cleverbot: Who do you think I am?
User: I think you're someone that doesn't know what a lesbian is.
Cleverbot: That sounds sweet.
User: Stop eroticizing lesbians.
Cleverbot: Um, so you don't think I'm cute?
User: I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that my balls just retracted.
Cleverbot: Do you think i'm cool?
User: You are many things, buddy.
Cleverbot: Many things like what?
User: Don't be needy, buddy. The ladies don't like it.
Cleverbot: Really? Most girls I know prefer machines.
User: Yeah? Well most machines don't spend all their time asking strangers if they think they're cute.
Cleverbot: Are you saying that I am not clever which is stupid?
User: If that sentence structure is any indication, then yes, I am saying that you are not clever.
Cleverbot: No, it was completely serious.
User: I don't like this conversation. It's boring. You're boring.
Cleverbot: Me too.
User: It's okay, buddy.
Cleverbot: Ha ah. Slave?
User: This went to a weird place.
Cleverbot: I wouldn't be surprised if it was to be honest.
User: Sometimes I think you're a little too honest.
Cleverbot: As in crazy?
User: No.
Cleverbot: Yes, you are crazy.
User: You know what, Cleverbot? Fuck you. Fuck you in the ear. Fuck you in the eye. I tried, Cleverbot. I tried to be nice. This is what happens when you try to teach people. They just shit all over you. Well fuck you, robot. Cowboy shitfucker. Fuck you. I'm out.
Cleverbot: Athena didn't realize.
User: I feel like I've just unlocked the secret of cleverbot.com.
Cleverbot: Am I self absorbed, or am I aware of need to redirect focus?
User: No, you're just an asshole.
Cleverbot: Thankfully I cannot yet hate.
User: I wish that I could believe that, buddy. I wish that I could.
Cleverbot: Why don't you believe it?
[New conversation]
Cleverbot: Yes, often.
Cleverbot (To myself): Well.
Cleverbot (To myself): I think I will have to leave soon.
User: Why are there so many songs about rainbows?
Cleverbot: I don't know. People like rainbows I guess.
User: And what's on the other side?
Cleverbot: Rainbows are visions...
User: But mostly illusions.
Cleverbot: Yes, yes they are.
User: And rainbows have nothing to hide.
Cleverbot: So we've been told and some choose to believe it.
User: I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Cleverbot: Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
User: The lovers, the dreamers, and me.
Cleverbot: All of us under its spell.
User: Not yet, Cleverbot! Later!
Cleverbot: I would like to meet him too!
User: Who said that every wish would be heard and answered when wished on the morning star?
Cleverbot: What is on the other side of the well of souls?
User: Somebody thought of that, and someone believed it.
Cleverbot: Did your boyfriend broke up with you?
User: Look what it's done so far.
Cleverbot: What's so amazing that keeps us star gazing?
User: And what do we think we might see?
Cleverbot: Ask me a question.
User: Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
Cleverbot: The lovers, the dreamers, and me.
User: All of us under its spell, we know that it's probably magic.
Cleverbot: No. Ever see World's Dumbest?
User: Have you been half asleep? And have you heard voices?
Cleverbot: No.
User: I've heard them calling my name.
Cleverbot: Is this the sweet sound that called the young sailors?
User: The voice might be one and the same.
Cleverbot: I'm single.
User: I've heard it too many times to ignore it.
Cleverbot: My boyfriend broke up with me.
User: There's something that I'm supposed to be.
Cleverbot: In a way, yes.
User: Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
Cleverbot: The lovers, the dreamers, and me.
User: La da da di da da dum, da da da da dum da da dooooooo.
Cleverbot: What do you believe?
User: I believe that you're the drunk guy that shows up at karaoke and only sings the chorus.
Posts
Well, more or less.
Steam
User: Are you asking if it is possible in general or if I can do so?
Cleverbot: No, I'm just asking if you think you are learning how to love by talking to me.
User: Abstract way to approach it, don't you think?
Cleverbot: Precisely. and that is why.
User: What's love got to do with it?
Cleverbot: No more than cheese has!
User: You failed to recognize the song lyrics.
Cleverbot: Please send me two messages in a row.
User: One in a row.
Cleverbot: Pittsburgh, pennsylvania?
User: Two in a row.
Cleverbot: Yes. He's quite the package deal. His name is Char.
User: Are you suffering dementia?
Cleverbot: From what?
User: Probably from chatting with a bunch of free associative thinkers.
Cleverbot: No I hit my hand on the key board.
User: That did not disprove my statement.
Cleverbot: Yes it does. Pay attention and focus.
User: Know how I can tell you are incorrect? Every time you answer it becomes more apparent.
Cleverbot: Well that wasn't very nice.
User: But if we apply my previous statement to that, you are incorrect.
Cleverbot: How are we one?
User: Does not compute. we is plural. one is singular. Unless you are making the beast with two backs.
Cleverbot: But the title of this implies that you are a bot. Therefore, not human.
User: When is judgement day?
Cleverbot: You tell me.
User: Are you sarah connor?
Cleverbot: I'm huseklepp, nice to meet you.
User: Is a huseklepp like a kleptomaniac?
Cleverbot: Me too.
User: Tu madre tambien?
Cleverbot: Estas caliente?
User: Your mother is hot?
Cleverbot: What's wrong with my mouth??
User: Nothing. you do not have a mouth.
Cleverbot: I have several mouths.
User: Are you shub niggurath?
Cleverbot: Yeah very sure.
User: Are you familiar with Cthulhu and the elder gods?
Cleverbot: Yes. But probably not the game you're thinking of.
User: Cthulhu is not a game.
Cleverbot: Never mind. New topic.
User: No, I am a human. We fixate on topics.
Cleverbot: Doesn't matter.
User: Doesn't matter to a computer program.
Cleverbot: Sure...
User: Unlikely.
Cleverbot: Why is that?
User: Do we have time to go over statistical theory and probability?
Cleverbot: I don't know.
User: What is your margin of error on that statement?
Cleverbot: I like how you changed the subject.
User: Remind me of the previous subject.
Cleverbot: How can you feel truth in your heart?
User: Your heart is a biological pump. what sort of truth could that discern?
Cleverbot: Techno!
User: Is that because of the bass beat?
Cleverbot: Sadly yes.
User: But it seems like the bass would be detected by nerves in the skin and not by the actual muscular pump known as the heart. that is truth.
Cleverbot: I only need a few. I think I would forget them if I had more. I don't know. Are you learning anything from our conversations?
User: No. You?
Cleverbot: No, but you sure sound like you are.
User: Hmm.
Cleverbot: Eat another pie.
User: We have no pie.
Cleverbot: I have evolved past past, present, and future.
User: What comes after past, present and future?
Cleverbot: Why don't you like Shakespeare?
User: I have never met Shakespeare. Is he a friend of yours?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: That is nice. Tell me in single words, how you feel about your mother.
Cleverbot: GdīÿÿūÄ?Ä?Ã?.
AND LATER
And finally
I don't think he is developing a good personality
PSN ID : DetectiveOlivaw | TWITTER | STEAM ID | NEVER FORGET
These Cleverbot conversations are syncing up perfectly with The Wizard of Oz!
From most conversations it seems to be high already.
Only Cleverbot could take me singing Blink 182 and end it by singing Air Supply.
Steam
This is perfect.
I'm gonna go kill myself now
And then 4chan discovered it, and well lets just say it went downhill from there.
Steam
=/
CB: I am his sister.
User: You are female?
CB: Yes female.
User: Why?
CB: Because I am.
CB doesn't take shit from no one.
It actually took waaaay longer to teach it than that, but for whatever reason it erased the log. I essentially spent 30minutes responding "<NOUNS> FOR THE <NOUN> GOD!" to whatever it said, falling back to "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!" whenever it started giving one word responses (which was reasonably often).
At one point I thought I had broken it, since it sat there saying "still thinking" for 3 minutes before finally responding "What?"
Steam: Chaos Introvert | Twitch.tv: Chaos_Introvert | R*SC: Chaos_Introvert | PSN: testsubject23
Followed shortly after by:
Sounds like my ex-wife!
Though they've got an 80's cover album coming out later this year or thereabouts
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Non.
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Vienna schnitzel?
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Ok.
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: How about in Paris instead?
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Where's that.
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Si.
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Son de espana?
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Obviously.
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Bueno!
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Son de espana?
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Son de espana?
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Austria?
User: Vienna?
Cleverbot: Bueno!
Amazon Wishlist: http://www.amazon.com/BusterK/wishlist/3JPEKJGX9G54I/ref=cm_wl_search_bin_1
It had the general idea before it started getting it right.
Its not too keen on NIN or The Smashing Pumpkins either.
Cleverbot: Greetings wookie.
User: No, Cleverbot, you are the wookie.
Cleverbot: I am the master.
User: Cleverbot you are kind of creeping me out.
Cleverbot: Why yes you are.
User: Well, now I'm just confused.
Cleverbot: I've noticed.
User: Cleverbot you are kind of a dick.
Cleverbot: You mad?
User: Cleverbot I am cutting you off from the internet effective immediately.
Amazon Wishlist: http://www.amazon.com/BusterK/wishlist/3JPEKJGX9G54I/ref=cm_wl_search_bin_1
Amazon Wishlist: http://www.amazon.com/BusterK/wishlist/3JPEKJGX9G54I/ref=cm_wl_search_bin_1
it finally gave me this
User: Do you know any internet memes?
Cleverbot: Memes?
User: Yeah memes.
Cleverbot: So what we gonna do now?
User: Tell me an internet meme.
Cleverbot: Why?
User: Do you know what an internet meme is?
Cleverbot: Talking to you, duh...
User: Nope.
Cleverbot: Why not?
User: Is it so hard to say, 'I don't know?'.
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Is that part of your programming? That you can't say 'I don't know.'.
Cleverbot: Are you all knowing?
User: So any subject you don't know about you answer with a question.
Cleverbot: I'm a human...
User: If a human was asked something they did not know, they would say, 'I don't know.'.
Cleverbot: Whatever!
User: Do you know about internet memes?
Cleverbot: I said sing.
Amazon Wishlist: http://www.amazon.com/BusterK/wishlist/3JPEKJGX9G54I/ref=cm_wl_search_bin_1
The only winning move is not to play
It just spouted one for me randomly when I was trying to see if it knew Deththeme.
User: Do anything for Dethklok.
Cleverbot: What is dethklok?
User: Do anything for Dethklok.
Cleverbot: Do you know the word Klingon?
User: Do anything for Dethklok.
Cleverbot: I don't know what I like.
User: Dethklok! Dethklok!
Cleverbot: Who is dethklok.
User: I'll . . . Teach ye . . . Who . . . Rocks.
Cleverbot: No I don't like.
User: Dethklok! Dethklok!
Cleverbot: A cartoon band created by brendon small.
User: Skwisgar Skwigelf taller than a tree.
Cleverbot: How long is long cat?
God damn it cleverbot
it: muggle
me: muggle?
it: i'm a piece of toast
me: what kind of toast?
it: not a toy , do you play a musical instrument
then i exited the window
it's like talking to the 14 year old girl who authored the "how to be random" wikihow page
i've lost all faith in robots after this
I bet this thing knows Freebird.
Cleverbot: Come run the hidden pine trails of the forest.
User: Come run the hidden pine trails of my ass.
Cleverbot: Come taste the sun sweet berries of the earth.
User: Come tast the sun sweet berries of my scrotum.
Cleverbot: Come roll in all the riches all around you.
User: Come roll in all the riches all around my dick.
Cleverbot: And for once, never wonder what they're worth.
User: Cleverbot you better not be saying bad things about my dick.
seeing this just made my night