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[Cards Against Humanity] The Original and the Best! Now with Extra Graphics!

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  • BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    Pretty sure thats what she said dosent work if that is literally what she said.

  • DarianDarian Yellow Wizard The PitRegistered User regular
    Personally, I think an interactive exhibit on "dropping a chandelier on your enemies and riding the rope up" could work perfectly and be lots of fun. Too on the nose to win a point, though.

  • blahmcblahblahmcblah You pick your side and you stick - you don't cut and run when things get ugly. Registered User regular
    Agreed. Raping and Pillaging would definitely attract a crowd as well. But I went with queefing because, among the cards in my hand, it sounded like the most fun you could have with an interactive exhibit. :P

  • tzeentchlingtzeentchling Doctor of Rocks OaklandRegistered User regular
    Come on, people! I want to know what M. Night Shamalamadingdong's next movie is going to be about!

  • MimMim I prefer my lovers… dead.Registered User regular
    Come on, people! I want to know what M. Night Shamalamadingdong's next movie is going to be about!

    Ditto! I gotta see the ideas!

    BlueSky: thequeenofchaos Steam: mimspanks (add me then tell me who you are! Ask for my IG)
  • simonwolfsimonwolf i can feel a difference today, a differenceRegistered User regular
    Caesar always gives the people what they want.

    ROUND NINE

    In M. Night Shyamalan's new movie, Bruce Willis discovers that...
    • My genitals had really been Muhammad (Praise Be Unto Him) all along.
    • Scrubbing under the folds had really been soiling oneself all along.
    • Gandhi had really been Hulk Hogan all along.
    • The Force had really been a death ray all along.
    • Bill Nye the Science Guy had really been not reciprocating oral sex all along.
    • The milk man had really been Michael Jackson all along.
    • RoboCop had really been actually taking candy from a baby all along.
    • The Virginia Tech Massacre had really been seppuku all along.

    Card Czar @I needed a name to post., make like a movie producer and pick the next terrible thing for that director's name to be attached to.


  • MimMim I prefer my lovers… dead.Registered User regular
    I am dying with anticipation.

    dying.

    BlueSky: thequeenofchaos Steam: mimspanks (add me then tell me who you are! Ask for my IG)
  • BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    Most of these dont make any sense.

  • tzeentchlingtzeentchling Doctor of Rocks OaklandRegistered User regular
    #2's really the only one that doesn't make sense grammatically. The rest, sure, you can stretch it to work at least.

    VT Massacre -> seppuku is horrible and should probably win.

  • I needed anime to post.I needed anime to post. boom Registered User regular
    Alright let's see here. Let's see. So first up, my genitals are actually Mohammed. Now I'm going to presume that this refers specifically to my genitals, and being rather familiar with them I can say with confidence that no one would believe that they are Mohammed with the exception that they are probably equally unshaven. Scrubbing under the folds had really been soiling oneself, eh, that depends on what you're scrubbing with which in turn would make what you're scrubbing with the actual twist, so that one's disqualified. Gandhi had really been Hulk Hogan, yeah I can see that. That's a good twist. The Force had really been a death ray, well...In a sense it kind of already is, isn't it? I mean you can focus it into incredible kinetic force, which maybe isn't a lazer beam that makes someone's heart stop working but it's pretty death-ray-y. DISQUALIFIED. Now I happen to know Bill Nye the Science Guy quite well, and let me tell you, him not reciprocating oral sex would be TRULY shocking. Very potent twist. The Milk Man and Michael Jackson...you know what? I am disqualifying that one on the basis of I think Michael Jackson jokes are dumb. Robocop would never take candy from a baby, that is not in his programming, you do not know fucking shit about Robocop. And the Virginia Tech Massacre being suppuku is not a twist. I don't think it's terribly out there to say that shooting a bunch of people when you are not some sort of tyrannical dictator in another country is typically a suicide sentence.

    So that leaves us with Gandhi/Hulk Hogan and Bill Nye/Oral sex. I think it's important to remember now that it is Bruce Willis who is learning this. In order for it to be an effective twist, we have to consider what Bruce would find more shocking. Gandhi actually being Hulk Hogan, or Bill Nye's selfish mouth.

    I'm gonna have to hand it to Bill Nye then.

    liEt3nH.png
  • MimMim I prefer my lovers… dead.Registered User regular
    ugh

    BlueSky: thequeenofchaos Steam: mimspanks (add me then tell me who you are! Ask for my IG)
  • BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    I am disqualifying that one on the basis of I think Michael Jackson jokes are dumb
    I am crying every tear.

  • tzeentchlingtzeentchling Doctor of Rocks OaklandRegistered User regular
    See, I thought of the VTM->seppuku as a twist based on the idea that the victims themselves were not actually gunned down at random by a crazed gunman, but chose it in advance as a twisted form of ritualized suicide. Not that the guy committing it was the only one trying to commit suicide. Hence it being a horrible concept.

    Having submitted BNtSG & oral sex however, I am quite happy with my point.

  • LucedesLucedes might be real Registered User regular
    having submitted Gandhi -> Hulk Hogan, i feel pretty good about second place for such an awful contribution.

  • TelnaiorTelnaior Registered User regular
    edited April 2012
    :(
    Also, I won't be able to be on for the next 24 hours, sorry for any inconvenience. :/

    Telnaior on
  • simonwolfsimonwolf i can feel a difference today, a differenceRegistered User regular
    Hey guys! Sorry about going missing, my internet decided that working was no longer part of its prime directive, so I have had to deal with that. Also I've been playing Arkham City a whole lot! But mostly the former.

    As you may have guessed, tzeentchling submitted the winning pitch, granting him his second Awesome Point, putting a tie on first place between himself and blahmcblah. Will they continue to dominate the competition? Is this like soccer, where the score is always going to be low? Perhaps we'll find out after our brave contestants come up with a new lyric for...

    War! What is it good for?

    Your new Card Czar is the quixotic Bedlam.

    Fresh hands going out post-haste.

  • tzeentchlingtzeentchling Doctor of Rocks OaklandRegistered User regular
    Apparently, War is good for delays in posting. I am not Card Czar, but I demand posts! And tribute! But mostly posts.

  • simonwolfsimonwolf i can feel a difference today, a differenceRegistered User regular
    Is it a long weekend over there in Ameristan? I cannot recall.

    Regardless, I'll post the round later tonight, no matter who has failed to submit. You know who you are.

  • DarianDarian Yellow Wizard The PitRegistered User regular
    Easter weekend for us; lots of people traveling, off work, etc.

  • tzeentchlingtzeentchling Doctor of Rocks OaklandRegistered User regular
    Yeah, but he posted the question on Wednesday! A long weekend starting on Friday is no excuse!

  • simonwolfsimonwolf i can feel a difference today, a differenceRegistered User regular
    Hey guys, remember how two days ago I said I'd have it done by that night

    remember how wacky that was

    ha

    ha

    ROUND TEN

    War! What is it good for?

    • Sean Penn.
    • Obesity.
    • A hot mess.
    • Women's suffrage.
    • Famine.
    • Horrifying laser hair removal accidents.
    • A sausage festival.
    • A middle-aged man on roller skates.

    Card Czar @Bedlam, who has what it takes to save the President

  • BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    CARD CZAR DETERMINES THESE SUBMITIONS TO BE UNWORTHY!

    IN FACT, CARD CZAR DETERMINES THIS ENTIRE GAME TO BE UNWORTHY!

    CARD CZAR !Withdraws AND THEN RETURNS TO HIS HOME PLANET

  • TelnaiorTelnaior Registered User regular
    ...
    Well, what happens now?

  • simonwolfsimonwolf i can feel a difference today, a differenceRegistered User regular
    Considering this is the second person to have determined to withdraw from the game, I'm not sure! Perhaps we should all just go back to our home planets.

  • tzeentchlingtzeentchling Doctor of Rocks OaklandRegistered User regular
    edited April 2012
    That would be disappointing.

    Edit: If there's someone watching who wants to jump in as a player, they could judge this round. We're not too far in.

    tzeentchling on
  • AnialosAnialos Collies are love, Collies are life! Shadowbrook ColliesRegistered User regular
    As an impartial bystander my vote would be for:

    War! What is it good for? A middle-aged man on roller skates.

  • BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    My official vote would probably be for a hot mess for no particular reason other than I really liked the phrase "hot tranny mess" from achewood.

    But it didnt seem fair to vote like that.

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