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[Parsely] Z-WARD: >eat shotgun

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Posts

  • mi-go huntermi-go hunter Once again I'm back in the lab. Cleaning my knives, ready for stabs.Registered User regular
  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You are in the Group Therapy room. Stairs lead down. There is an elevator here.
    Exits: North, East, West, Down, or Enter (elevator)

    >There is a zombie here, watching TV with its mouth wide open.

  • blahmcblahblahmcblah I never drink... wine. Registered User regular
    >Hit zombie with fire extinguisher.

  • vertrouevertroue I am Female Totes Not a SithRegistered User regular
    >Go East

    Blood and Fire
    From the Desk of Darth Vertroue Diplomat to the USA.
  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You can't bludgeon the zombie! He'll just get back up.

    >You are in one of the hospital's examination rooms. At the north end of the room there is a padlocked door with a sign on it. There is a syringe here.
    Exits: North (locked), East, West

  • blahmcblahblahmcblah I never drink... wine. Registered User regular
    >Inject self with syringe.

  • blahmcblahblahmcblah I never drink... wine. Registered User regular
    >Read sign on door.

    >Break padlock with fire extinguisher.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You inject yourself with the syringe. You feel sleepy and heavy. You pass out and wake up a few hours later, groggy. There is still some fluid left in the syringe.

    >The sign reads: "Seclusion room. Keep locked." You'll need a key.

    >Breaking or freezing the padlock won't work.

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    >Eat padlock

    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You can't fucking eat that.

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    >Go West

    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You are in the Group Therapy room. Stairs lead down. There is an elevator here.
    Exits: North, East, West, Down, or Enter (elevator)

    >A zombie is here, watching TV with its mouth wide open.

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    Derped on which way we came from
    >Go East Twice

    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You are in the Electro-Shock Therapy room. There is a wheelchair here.
    Exits: West

    >A zombie is sitting in the wheelchair, wired to the EST machine.

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    So a shock chair. This seems like it could be somewhat sensitive. Anyone mind if I waste a save?

    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    On further thought, I'm being silly.
    >Examine EST machine

    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You see a dial with four settings: off, low, medium and high. It's currently set to the off position.

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    >Eat Dial
    >Set Dial to Medium

    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >How the fuck have you survived in the modern world? Do you just put your mouth on whatever interesting thing you see, and you just start gnawing away like a fucking junkyard dog? "Oh, this looks important, better try to eat it. That's what rational people do." Like, do you seriously think that's going to help save your crazy-ass sister? She's up here somewhere. She's scared. A hospital full of zombies and one Pete, and she's depending on you. She needs you to help her. She is lost without you. But fuck her, I guess, there's too many non-food items in this disgusting hospital that I need to eat. I wonder if this chair tastes like anything? No. Tastes like a chair. What the fuck did I expect? Maybe this whole thing is a sham - maybe you're not saving a crazy person from their fate, but rather, you are the crazy person. What semblance of humanity I once had is being slowly drained away by your desire to eat EVERY FUCKING THING you come across. It's not food! None of it is food! The funny part? You're carrying around a fucking tray of food in your goddamn, I guess it's your pocket? And that's still there. You have food on you, but you insist on chewing on light switches and door knobs. What is your fucking problem?

    >You set the dial to medium.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >The zombie jerks around and the lights flicker. The zombie is stunned! You may remove him from the chair. No, seriously. Go ahead.

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    Hmm... Should I eat the zombie?
    Nah, cook it more first.
    >Set Dial to High

    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    Also, are you actually getting angry here? I try not to be a troll of sorts, but that makes me laugh harder.

    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You turn the dial to high. The zombie jerks around and squeals. His brain explodes in a horrible gory mess! You get zombie all over you. Also, the lights go out - the entire hospital is plunged into darkness. You can't see anything.

    >You are in the EST room where shock treatment occurs. There is a wheelchair here.
    Exits: West

  • TayrunTayrun Registered User regular
    (It finally happened. We finally broke him!)

    3DS: 5257-9337-8263
  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    Haha, no way. I'm just fucking with ya. You're doing the right thing here - that's what makes this so great to play live, with a large group of people.

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    Eww, microwave explosions. Those are the worst.
    >Wield wheelchair

    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You're pushing the wheelchair around.

    >Suddenly, the lights flicker back on! You have no idea why. They stay on.

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    >Go west

    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You are in one of the hospital's Examination rooms. At the north side of the room there is a padlocked door with a sign on it.
    Exits: North (locked), East, West

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    >Continue west

    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You are in the Group Therapy room. Stairs lead down. There is an elevator here.
    Exits: North, East, West, Down, Enter (elevator)

    >There is a zombie here, watching TV with its mouth wide open.

  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    edited April 2012
    >Enter elevator
    >Hit button labelled B
    >Inventory

    towndrunk34 on
    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >Woah, woah. Slow down there, Tex. Let's keep commands to a minimum, in case other people want to jump in.

    >You enter the elevator. You go to B - the basement.

    >You are in the basement, the entrance to the steam tunnels. There is a mop bucket here by the elevator.
    Exits: Enter (elevator), Enter (steam tunnels)

    >INVENTORY: film reels, fire extinguisher, note, keycard, syringe, tray of food, wheelchair

  • TraceofToxinTraceofToxin King Nothing Registered User regular
    edited April 2012
    >Mastrubate in bucket

    >Take bucket

    TraceofToxin on
    Everyday I wake up is the worst day of my life.
  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >I guess maybe waiting for other people was a bad idea.

  • TraceofToxinTraceofToxin King Nothing Registered User regular
    >Eat bucket

    Everyday I wake up is the worst day of my life.
  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >You get the bucket. The water inside spills out.

  • TraceofToxinTraceofToxin King Nothing Registered User regular
    >Inspect bucket water

    Everyday I wake up is the worst day of my life.
  • towndrunk34towndrunk34 Registered User regular
    edited April 2012
    JOIN USSSSSS
    >realize we are the real zombies
    >Enter the Steam Tunnels.

    towndrunk34 on
    >You don't want to drink that water anyway. Somebody tried to jizz in it last page.

  • weirdspaceshipsweirdspaceships i will eat your still-beating heart Registered User regular
    >The water is relatively clean.

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