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Blerrrrgh (warning: this thread is gross)

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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    Naming cars

    (Fooooooooord)

    (BUIIIIIIIICK)

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    DouglasDangerDouglasDanger PennsylvaniaRegistered User regular
    Sara Lynn wrote: »
    My big toenail has a fungus or something and that is pretty terrible. From what I can tell from the internet I'm stuck with it unless I go on some medication that is really bad for your liver. COOL.

    I just never wear sandals, though Annie claims it's not that noticable. Hopefully it will just go away as magically as it came.

    toenail fungus is forever, unless you take that one super expensive no insurance covers this because it might make your liver fail medicine
    i got it freshman year, 10 years ago and still have it

    my doctor said it might go away if my toenails are removed
    and there is a sort of informal study with smearing vicks vap-o-rub all over your toenails
    but i did that for 5 months and saw no change

    i'm sorry

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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me.

    Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o' clock this afternoon... with nail polish.

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    AbracadanielAbracadaniel Registered User regular
    Once @Javen had to carry a bag of my neon pink barf out to a hotel dumpster in cold weather in his boxers.

    :oops:

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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    Smart Hero wrote: »
    Once @Javen had to carry a bag of my neon pink barf out to a hotel dumpster in cold weather in his boxers.

    :oops:

    You guys keep telling the end of the story without all the interesting things leading up to it.

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    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    So

    One time, the week before finals, I had a stomach flu something fierce. Monday Tuesday I spent at home puking. Wednesday nothing's left in my stomach and I feel, well, not 100% but better. I keep down some crackers. I have an appointment to go with my finals partner (writing, memorizing and presenting three dialogues in Korean) to her house (on the opposite side of the city) to practice. I'm sure I'll be fine. I go, and in traditional Korean hospitality fashion, she orders a Mystery Asia Pizza for lunch.

    "Oh please eat more pizza!"

    I am staring at the one piece I've partially consumed with great concern. Another piece appears on the plate. Oh, dear.

    But I'll be fine! We practice for four hours or so. Her husband comes home. I'm ready to peace out because I'm tired, feeling kinda wonky and I live about an hour and twenty minutes from their place.

    "Oh no, you know, I'm Korean, I can't have a guest and not feed them, you have to come to dinner. Just a little dinner."

    Feeling green, I allow myself to be talked into a very fancy dinner at a Korean place that specializes in beef. Rich, fat-marbled grilled beef. And beer. A few bites in and I know I'm doing A Bad Thing but okay okay okay it'll be fine...

    I have to take two buses to get home. I have no money in my bank account, and exactly enough money on my transportation card to get me this one ride home, so this is how it's going to have to be. I get on the first bus and immediately realize I've made a mistake in terms of stomach integrity, but when I think to Emergency Phone a Friend my phone battery dies. No phone, no cash for a taxi, I am riding these buses home. Everything is under control through the first bus, but as soon as I transfer to my last bus I realize A Horrible Mistake Has Been Made. Cold sweats break out. No one else is on the bus, but if I throw up and get kicked off the bus I have a two hour walk home.

    I waited for the driver to be looking away and profusely vomited pizza, beer and steak into the front pocket of my own backpack. Onto my cell phone. Which died.

    RUVCwyu.jpg
    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
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    UsagiUsagi Nah Registered User regular
    Usagi wrote: »
    And double worst is when you hurl so hard you burst blood vessels in your eyes/eyelids/undereyes and look like somebody beat the shit out of you, or maybe this is just a thing that happens to me because I'm ultra pale

    Is this the cover story Dru gave you

    > >

    < <

    Mmmmmmaybe

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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    So

    One time, the week before finals, I had a stomach flu something fierce. Monday Tuesday I spent at home puking. Wednesday nothing's left in my stomach and I feel, well, not 100% but better. I keep down some crackers. I have an appointment to go with my finals partner (writing, memorizing and presenting three dialogues in Korean) to her house (on the opposite side of the city) to practice. I'm sure I'll be fine. I go, and in traditional Korean hospitality fashion, she orders a Mystery Asia Pizza for lunch.

    "Oh please eat more pizza!"

    I am staring at the one piece I've partially consumed with great concern. Another piece appears on the plate. Oh, dear.

    But I'll be fine! We practice for four hours or so. Her husband comes home. I'm ready to peace out because I'm tired, feeling kinda wonky and I live about an hour and twenty minutes from their place.

    "Oh no, you know, I'm Korean, I can't have a guest and not feed them, you have to come to dinner. Just a little dinner."

    Feeling green, I allow myself to be talked into a very fancy dinner at a Korean place that specializes in beef. Rich, fat-marbled grilled beef. And beer. A few bites in and I know I'm doing A Bad Thing but okay okay okay it'll be fine...

    I have to take two buses to get home. I have no money in my bank account, and exactly enough money on my transportation card to get me this one ride home, so this is how it's going to have to be. I get on the first bus and immediately realize I've made a mistake in terms of stomach integrity, but when I think to Emergency Phone a Friend my phone battery dies. No phone, no cash for a taxi, I am riding these buses home. Everything is under control through the first bus, but as soon as I transfer to my last bus I realize A Horrible Mistake Has Been Made. Cold sweats break out. No one else is on the bus, but if I throw up and get kicked off the bus I have a two hour walk home.

    I waited for the driver to be looking away and profusely vomited pizza, beer and steak into the front pocket of my own backpack. Onto my cell phone. Which died.

    1233928590_citizen%20kane%20clapping.gif

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    SLyMSLyM Registered User regular
    I ate some bad ceasar salad while on vacation in Ireland once, and spent the rest of the day with liquid being forcibly ejected from both ends. Occasionally almost simultaneously!

    My friend is working on a roguelike game you can play if you want to. (It has free demo)
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    The GeekThe Geek Oh-Two Crew, Omeganaut Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Stand By Me

    BLM - ACAB
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    Mr FuzzbuttMr Fuzzbutt Registered User regular
    When I was a fuzzlet I used to eat until I chundered on a regular basis.

    I haven't spewed in over ten years now though.

    broken image link
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    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    The best part is the part where I rode the bus the other twenty minutes home, and slowly hiked up the mountain I live on with a backpack full of warm puke.

    Also it was my third cell phone that year.

    I am a hero of amazing decision making capabilities!

    RUVCwyu.jpg
    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
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    Sara LynnSara Lynn I can handle myself. Registered User regular
    Sara Lynn wrote: »
    My big toenail has a fungus or something and that is pretty terrible. From what I can tell from the internet I'm stuck with it unless I go on some medication that is really bad for your liver. COOL.

    I just never wear sandals, though Annie claims it's not that noticable. Hopefully it will just go away as magically as it came.

    toenail fungus is forever, unless you take that one super expensive no insurance covers this because it might make your liver fail medicine
    i got it freshman year, 10 years ago and still have it

    my doctor said it might go away if my toenails are removed
    and there is a sort of informal study with smearing vicks vap-o-rub all over your toenails
    but i did that for 5 months and saw no change

    i'm sorry

    I blame being sweaty at work all the time. At least the job I hate will be a gift that keeps on giving, even after I leave. Gift of forever fungus.
    Really this depresses the shit out of me. FUCK

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    Mr FuzzbuttMr Fuzzbutt Registered User regular
    whatever you do, don't think about fish milkshakes

    forget about putting a whole fish and bad milk in a blender

    clear from your mind all thoughts of that vile pinkish slurry, full of scaly blobs of flesh and lumps that shouldn't look that much like yoghurt

    broken image link
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    SquallSquall hap cloud Registered User regular
    i ended up hurling for the first time in 8-9 years a few weeks ago at my bachelor party

    i was given a mystery shot which later turned out to be the dregs of all the near empty liquor bottles in the bar (who the hell does this)

    two bars later i feel sick but haven't puked in so long i am completely unable to recognize the signs of when i need to move to a toilet

    for the first heave i upend into my empty water glass, overfilling it and spilling all over the table

    three or four more heaves follow

    my mates give one of the workers a $10 and shuffle me out of the bar; i still feel terrible for that dude

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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    Squall wrote: »
    i ended up hurling for the first time in 8-9 years a few weeks ago at my bachelor party

    i was given a mystery shot which later turned out to be the dregs of all the near empty liquor bottles in the bar (who the hell does this)

    two bars later i feel sick but haven't puked in so long i am completely unable to recognize the signs of when i need to move to a toilet

    for the first heave i upend into my empty water glass, overfilling it and spilling all over the table

    three or four more heaves follow

    my mates give one of the workers a $10 and shuffle me out of the bar; i still feel terrible for that dude

    $10?! How generous!

    Really though he probably just went into the back and said his table was ready to be bussed

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    EndEnd Registered User regular
    edited July 2012
    The last time I threw up is why I don't drink rum anymore. Just the smell of rum now makes me feel sick. I also don't remember much of the night.

    End on
    I wish that someway, somehow, that I could save every one of us
    zaleiria-by-lexxy-sig.jpg
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    XehalusXehalus Registered User regular
    last time I threw up it was one of those ginseng, grape, and alcohol mixed in a can deals

    my stomach punched me in the throat

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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    I took a Zofran

    And promptly threw it up

    goddammit

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    DouglasDangerDouglasDanger PennsylvaniaRegistered User regular
    Sara Lynn wrote: »
    Sara Lynn wrote: »
    My big toenail has a fungus or something and that is pretty terrible. From what I can tell from the internet I'm stuck with it unless I go on some medication that is really bad for your liver. COOL.

    I just never wear sandals, though Annie claims it's not that noticable. Hopefully it will just go away as magically as it came.

    toenail fungus is forever, unless you take that one super expensive no insurance covers this because it might make your liver fail medicine
    i got it freshman year, 10 years ago and still have it

    my doctor said it might go away if my toenails are removed
    and there is a sort of informal study with smearing vicks vap-o-rub all over your toenails
    but i did that for 5 months and saw no change

    i'm sorry

    I blame being sweaty at work all the time. At least the job I hate will be a gift that keeps on giving, even after I leave. Gift of forever fungus.
    Really this depresses the shit out of me. FUCK

    i have fungus on my right toenails, but it oddly skipped the second toe

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    XehalusXehalus Registered User regular
    does gatorade or powerade aggravate your stomach

    that stuff and crackers kept me from dying once

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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    I hate gatorade and its ilk

    It makes me throat feel salty

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    GreasyKidsStuffGreasyKidsStuff MOMMM! ROAST BEEF WANTS TO KISS GIRLS ON THE TITTIES!Registered User regular
    Last time I puked was when I had drank a mixture of everyone's booze (King's Cup, yahooooo) and then proceeded to have another drink of my own after that. So nothing too extraordinary unlike Salient's story.

    It is still awful though and I feel for you Josh

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    GreasyKidsStuffGreasyKidsStuff MOMMM! ROAST BEEF WANTS TO KISS GIRLS ON THE TITTIES!Registered User regular
    Also I was unable to drink whiskey for a looooooong time after one particularly awful experience at a party a few years back. That was fun.

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    SyphyreSyphyre A Dangerous Pastime Registered User regular
    edited July 2012
    Sickness and our bodies are weird.

    On one hand, you think "Oh please no the last thing I want to do is throw up."

    On the other hand, that leeetle bit of turkey you ate with the 7up and crackers is making your stomach turn inside out and you somehow know that if you DO throw up, you'll feel much better.

    Syphyre on
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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    My great uncle used to chew tobacco and spit into empty soda cans

    When he first started dating my great aunt, she did not know this because he knew it was gross and did a decent job of hiding it from her

    So when he went to the restroom the first time she was over at his place, she was thirsty and saw a can sitting on the table, shook it to see if it was empty or not, then took a big swig

    When he came out of the restroom, there was a brownish/tan/technicolor stain all over his dining room carpet

    It never came out, and I was told this story when I asked what the discoloration was when I was a kid

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    skettiosskettios Enchanted ForestRegistered User regular
    edited July 2012
    One time I had the flu.
    It made cranberry juice the most delicious thing and made me not like maple donuts (which are my FAVE). I know this because my folks had brought home some donuts for us kids. I was the saddest fat kid.

    skettios on
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    blixaphonicsblixaphonics the french champagne Registered User regular
    i remember hanging out in the backyard with some friends and drinking back in high school, then the neighbour offered us hamburgers off his BBQ. i ate about 3 then went inside an hour later and clogged my friend's sink with a thick ground-beef paste vomit.

    worst thing is i proceeded to stumble back to the living room and pass the fuck out, and had to scoop that shit out when i was sober. it was interesting because it had separated into layers over a few hours.

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    KadithKadith Registered User regular
    My great uncle used to chew tobacco and spit into empty soda cans

    When he first started dating my great aunt, she did not know this because he knew it was gross and did a decent job of hiding it from her

    So when he went to the restroom the first time she was over at his place, she was thirsty and saw a can sitting on the table, shook it to see if it was empty or not, then took a big swig

    When he came out of the restroom, there was a brownish/tan/technicolor stain all over his dining room carpet

    It never came out, and I was told this story when I asked what the discoloration was when I was a kid

    man who just drinks out of a random can sitting around at someone else's house

    zkHcp.jpg
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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    Girls are the weirdest

    Like

    You have a certain set of preferences for foods and drinks and such

    And then you get pregnant

    And then it randomly changes

    As a guy, it is very concerning

    We have already allocated memory space to those preferences, and it takes time to reset that and remember what you like and don't like now instead of what you have liked for the entirety of the time we have known you

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    DouglasDangerDouglasDanger PennsylvaniaRegistered User regular
    well, i think gatorade is sort of salty
    maybe on purpose

    i haven't thrown up from illness in a long, long time
    i get way too drunk and hurl about once a year though

    when i get any sort of digestive... turmoil? i always get the shits

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    thenshewaslikethenshewaslike Registered User regular
    My husband and I both got horrible food poisoning back in January. He was puking into the sink in the kitchen while I got the bathroom because I woke up feeling sick about thirty seconds before he did. My grim determination to not vomit (which is mostly unhelpful with food poisoning, since it's going to come out one way or the other) let me keep enough fluids in me to be sort of okay, while he ended up at the clinic with an IV in his arm.

    The worst thing though was at some point when I was semiconscious he got out one a Pyrex bowl to bring into the bed room. After he used it, he snapped the lid on it and put it under the bed. Our bedroom is very narrow, and you have to get down on the floor at the foot to see if anything is under there closer to the head. Not something I'm in the habit of doing unless I can't find one of our cats. I had known one of the bowls was missing, but figured he had left it at work. A couple months or so later, I found it. He had no memory of having used it or left it there.

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    DouglasDangerDouglasDanger PennsylvaniaRegistered User regular
    i will never understand people puking sinks
    it was thing in the one dorm at college
    the toilet's right there, and so much easier to clean! if you have decent aim, all you need to do is flush!
    you don't have to scoop

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    JayKaosJayKaos Registered User regular
    Kadith wrote: »
    My great uncle used to chew tobacco and spit into empty soda cans

    When he first started dating my great aunt, she did not know this because he knew it was gross and did a decent job of hiding it from her

    So when he went to the restroom the first time she was over at his place, she was thirsty and saw a can sitting on the table, shook it to see if it was empty or not, then took a big swig

    When he came out of the restroom, there was a brownish/tan/technicolor stain all over his dining room carpet

    It never came out, and I was told this story when I asked what the discoloration was when I was a kid

    man who just drinks out of a random can sitting around at someone else's house

    Once when I was little I was given precise instructions on how to use the coffee machine, and then sent to make coffee because my mom didn't want to get up.

    Turns out they had a habit of dumping the leftover grease from cooking in a coffee can on the stove so it didn't clog the drain.

    Steam | SW-0844-0908-6004 and my Switch code
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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    Kadith wrote: »
    My great uncle used to chew tobacco and spit into empty soda cans

    When he first started dating my great aunt, she did not know this because he knew it was gross and did a decent job of hiding it from her

    So when he went to the restroom the first time she was over at his place, she was thirsty and saw a can sitting on the table, shook it to see if it was empty or not, then took a big swig

    When he came out of the restroom, there was a brownish/tan/technicolor stain all over his dining room carpet

    It never came out, and I was told this story when I asked what the discoloration was when I was a kid

    man who just drinks out of a random can sitting around at someone else's house

    I never said it was especially smart of her

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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    My husband and I both got horrible food poisoning back in January. He was puking into the sink in the kitchen while I got the bathroom because I woke up feeling sick about thirty seconds before he did. My grim determination to not vomit (which is mostly unhelpful with food poisoning, since it's going to come out one way or the other) let me keep enough fluids in me to be sort of okay, while he ended up at the clinic with an IV in his arm.

    The worst thing though was at some point when I was semiconscious he got out one a Pyrex bowl to bring into the bed room. After he used it, he snapped the lid on it and put it under the bed. Our bedroom is very narrow, and you have to get down on the floor at the foot to see if anything is under there closer to the head. Not something I'm in the habit of doing unless I can't find one of our cats. I had known one of the bowls was missing, but figured he had left it at work. A couple months or so later, I found it. He had no memory of having used it or left it there.

    Oh god, the smell must have been legendary

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    Bendery It Like BeckhamBendery It Like Beckham Hopeless Registered User regular
    edited July 2012
    I went to a party 2 months back, it was a going away for a co-worker of mine. I spent the night drinking mildly, and eating the food I brought cause everyone else just bought alcohol.

    Then the time came to wind down and play a drinking game "kings cup". We were all out of beer, and I was drinking a moderately strong "Wild Turkey and Coke".
    For those that don't know me, I'm a small guy with very low alcohol tolerance.
    Long story short, kings cup eventually became "Bendery's cup" and I passed out drunk on the couch... until I woke up to vomit. I vomited for a good 2-3 hours, occasionally falling asleep.

    I'm told on one of these occasions, and I remember bits and pieces, I was woken up by another drunk member of the party demanding someone else in the group take a shot. He kept saying "I'm not shutting up till this shot is drunk!" So without missing a beat, I stood up, flipped him off, drank the shot, slammed the glass on the table, and puked in the bucket I had made great friends with over the last couple hours. I then proceeded to go back to sleep.

    Bendery It Like Beckham on
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    KadithKadith Registered User regular
    I would've just thrown it away, unopened.

    zkHcp.jpg
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    thenshewaslikethenshewaslike Registered User regular
    My husband and I both got horrible food poisoning back in January. He was puking into the sink in the kitchen while I got the bathroom because I woke up feeling sick about thirty seconds before he did. My grim determination to not vomit (which is mostly unhelpful with food poisoning, since it's going to come out one way or the other) let me keep enough fluids in me to be sort of okay, while he ended up at the clinic with an IV in his arm.

    The worst thing though was at some point when I was semiconscious he got out one a Pyrex bowl to bring into the bed room. After he used it, he snapped the lid on it and put it under the bed. Our bedroom is very narrow, and you have to get down on the floor at the foot to see if anything is under there closer to the head. Not something I'm in the habit of doing unless I can't find one of our cats. I had known one of the bowls was missing, but figured he had left it at work. A couple months or so later, I found it. He had no memory of having used it or left it there.

    Oh god, the smell must have been legendary

    I can only imagine, as I made him deal with it.

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    Duke 2.0Duke 2.0 Time Trash Cat Registered User regular
    I don't really have puke stories. I only ever got really badly sick once, and that was a week-long ordeal where my throat straight up died, requiring a tube to get fluids down my neck. Had a bowl by my bed I spit into because my nose was producing a ton of phlem and I couldn't swallow anything, so I just had to spit it out.

    Now that I'm 21 I look forward to my chances of puking raising exponentially

    VRXwDW7.png
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