The Kevin Durant's Achilles Memorial NBA 2019 Offseason Thread

jackisreal

Alright guys! Get ready for this super awesome draft pi--

Nah, fuck it, jump shoooot!



Russell Westbrook, welcome to the Ballsystem! If you pull a Lamar Odom (cursed be his name) on me this year, I will hunt you down



Good thing his glasses don't have frames though. I mean, how else would he be able to see with them on?

Your pick, @deadonthestreet !

Eat it You Nasty Pig.

I went looking for funny pictures of westbrook, but what I realized is

there are so many bizarre pictures of him out there that none of them really stand out. It's like trying to find the funniest clown costume

Kasyn

Oh shit, I am way not prepared for this.

deadonthestreet

Dwyane Wade

Again

Every year

@kasyn go go go

Kasyn

Don't be scared, DWill, Alligator Fuckhouse will take you and your soon-to-decline stats.

@y2jake215 yerrrrrrrrrr up

y2jake215

No one jumps out at me here so I'll make the unsexy (I mean that very literally) pick of Al Ricardo Jefferson

@dlinfiniti

Phonehand

williams will be much better this year than last.

Form of Monkey!

Phonehand wrote: »

williams will be much better this year than last.

He'll have that new arena / new franchise / new contract situation / finally playing with some help

glow, that's for sure.

jackisreal

At least he won't be tanking at the end of the year, one hopes.

dlinfiniti

i can't believe i'm doing this
with their first round pick in the draft, the sp00ns take
PAAAAAAUUUULLL MIILLSSSAAAAAPPP

c'mon man
I'm not liking this anymore than you are, you can at least pretend to be excited to join the sp00ns

ughh
fine whatever
the captain of your 2012-13 season champions ladies and gentlemen!!!!

@yotes

Eat it You Nasty Pig.

Al Jefferson must be taken in a package with his good buddy, baron davis:

Eat it You Nasty Pig.

also dlin, @yotes is after you, not mightypuck

dlinfiniti

Eat it You Nasty Pig. wrote: »

also dlin, @yotes is after you, not mightypuck

dammit
trickery

Kasyn

Love that Davis / Jefferson picture.

Eat it You Nasty Pig.

I have had one person ask to drop out, so if anybody lurking would like to play, let me know

yotes

You pricks, I wanted one of Millsap/Jefferson, so I'll pick LaMarcus Aldridge and not trade him for Steph Curry's glass ankles this time.





(Watch Curry play 76 games, putting up 25/4/9 while LaMarcus sits out the season after a new heart scare in training camp.)

@Eddy

jackisreal

yotes wrote: »

You pricks, I wanted one of Millsap/Jefferson, so I'll pick LaMarcus Aldridge and not trade him for Steph Curry's glass ankles this time.

(Watch Curry play 76 games, putting up 25/4/9 while LaMarcus sits out the season after a new heart scare in training camp.)

@Eddy

http://bit.ly/Qtt6EU

/snarkattack

Form of Monkey!

jackisreal wrote: »

yotes wrote: »

You pricks, I wanted one of Millsap/Jefferson, so I'll pick LaMarcus Aldridge and not trade him for Steph Curry's glass ankles this time.

(Watch Curry play 76 games, putting up 25/4/9 while LaMarcus sits out the season after a new heart scare in training camp.)

@Eddy

http://bit.ly/Qtt6EU

/snarkattack

Brandon Roy is literally playing basketball again because he has spent time away from the Blazers' medical staff! They attach leeches to ACL tears and use mustard and garlic to ward off The Plague!

Eat it You Nasty Pig.

For the record it was eddy who asked to be replaced, so it's not just that he's late

I don't have anybody else handy, though

jackisreal

edit: nothing to see here

yotes

T Portland doctors: don't put leeches in Aldridge's heart.

Pirate Viper

I wouldn't mind taking the extra spot since you guys haven't had any other takers yet.

y2jake215

You can have it but only if you draft Latrell Sprewell first

Pirate Viper

I was leaning towards Penny Hardaway, but I guess I could see the wisdom in taking Sprewell.

Eat it You Nasty Pig.

good deal, you can replace eddy. Which means it's your pick!

ed: @Pirate%20Viper

ed2: did that work? how do you alert people with spaces in their names

Form of Monkey!

Put their name in quotation marks after the @ sign.

Like @Form of Monkey

@Pirate Viper

y2jake215

also I think if you edit in a @ whoever, it doesn't notify them. at least it didn't used to

themightypuck

EOQ @ work so I might not check things until late tomorrow night if things are crazy tomorrow. I do have a pick all planned out.

y2jake215

you could just PM it to whoever picks after you, if you end up busy

themightypuck

Good plan.

Pirate Viper

Sorry for the delay guys, wasn't near a computer much yesterday afternoon/evening.

Anyways, I'm picking Kyrie Irving even though it goes against my everything in Ohio is terrible rule.

EDIT: @themightypuck Your pick.

themightypuck

EL MAMBA NEGRO

@Eat it You Nasty Pig

dlinfiniti

nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
you son of a bitch

jackisreal

Good to see Kobe back in the first round though

themightypuck

I really didn't think I'd get him on the flipside, although I have a bad feeling about my other choice.

Eat it You Nasty Pig.

Time to pick a guy I had last year!



He's good at making funny faces, whether sad



or sad



or uh, sad?



Josh Smif, come on down!

@clownfood

clownfood

F*ck....this is going on now? I am not ready for this. I'll pick in like 3 hours when I get home from the bar.

clownfood

DeMarcus Cousins



Marc Gasol



Back to you @Eat it You Nasty Pig

Form of Monkey!

If we're winding down the first round, then it comes back to me at the start of the second.

But @clownfood, I'm afraid I ain't crystal on who you've just picked.

You got Boogie Cousins then? Marc Gasol is just pumping his fist in celebration of your pick of Cousins for the center spot?

themightypuck

Form of Monkey! wrote: »

If we're winding down the first round, then it comes back to me at the start of the second.

But @clownfood, I'm afraid I ain't crystal on who you've just picked.

You got Boogie Cousins then? Marc Gasol is just pumping his fist in celebration of your pick of Cousins for the center spot?

What language is this?