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Should I quit this job for my mental and physical health, or is there something I can do?
The_Spaniard
It's never lupinesIrvine, CaliforniaRegistered User regular
It's never lupinesIrvine, CaliforniaRegistered User regular
For the last 10 years I worked for various companies in the videogame industry, but when the economy cratered, I like over a hundred thousand other industry employees, found myself unemployed. I ended up getting a retail job, just to make ends meet. It's videogame retail, so I still get to talk about and do what I'm good at and love. And I'm good at it. As long as I've been working at this store, I've had spectacular numbers, and sales figures. I get regular customer compliments, and I am even personally responsible for making our store number 3 in the entire company of over a thousand stores in sales of a particular product. Before I started at this store, the department I'm in was averaging 40-60% of its expected budget for the day, when I got there it jumped to an average of 100% if not more on a regular basis.
Suffice to say, I'm a good employee, I do my job, and I get things done. Problem is that on occasion management, and there are a lot of managers, makes unreasonable or untenable requests. And instead of sacrificing my ethics, well being of my department, etc, I let them know that I'm sorry, but I can't follow through with their request. This has put a bee in the bonnet of managers that are used to meek register biscuits doing whatever they demand of them. So yesterday I had a meeting with two managers telling me that there are some issues with my work ethic, performance, professionalism, etc. I promptly called BS and said that if I was a lazy unprofessional employee, that my on paper stats would not be what they were. They hand-waved that aside and said that my revenue numbers and such were not in question, but everything else they mentioned. I then asked for examples, and was able to easily explain them as false and said that there were witnesses that could attest to my innocence. They gave a couple more examples of things that co-workers had said to them about me or said that I have done. I was bemused considering that the co-workers they mentioned were the two people I trusted more than anyone else in the store and had complained more than anyone else about management to me. They basically boiled it down to the old shape up or ship out and ended the meeting.
I then talked to the aforementioned co-workers and not only did they say what was said was complete BS, that they were also willing to speak up on my behalf to confront management on the apparent lies they had just told me in the meeting. We agreed that a frank and honest meeting between management and the involved employees that wanted to speak up was a good idea, considering there was a mounting list of grievances that they wanted to air and see if they would be willing to talk about them. I talked to a couple of other co-workers that had vented to me about issues with the store and management in the past, asking if they too would like to be a part of this meeting. They said yes, but apparently one fearing for their job and wanting to ingratiate themselves to management.. well to put it bluntly, snitched.
I had a couple co-workers come up to me and tell me that one of the managers was going around asking questions about me trying to gather up information for some reason or another. This did not sit well because I could see where this was going. I was later pulled into another meeting to discuss why I'm, "Bullying employees into a meeting they don't want to attend and trying to make them all talk shit about management to make me look better." I explained to him that I did nothing more than asked a couple of co-workers if they would be interested in taking part in a meeting to discuss issues with management, which I believe any employee of any company in the United States should have the right to do. There is nothing wrong with wanting to speak to management in a respectful manner about issues that might be occurring at work. I also brought up, that I find it odd that people are coming to him, when I have people telling me that he is the one going around the store asking about me. He flatly denied that he had been doing that, and even went so far as to say that my name had not even passed his lips with other employees today. I told him that I found that confusing considering what I was being told, what was I supposed to think or believe, and why would they say that to me? He said he didn't know, but it didn't happen. I asked then why was I told what I was told once again, and he then leaned forward with a grin and asked me to give him names then. I solemnly refused such a request, saying that I was not going to throw the people under the bus that were trying to help me.
Shortly after the meeting was over, I had a co-worker come to me and tell me that they had just been very sternly talked to by that manager again, asking if they had told me about the conversation that he had had with them earlier. When they said no, he apparently pushed and asked if they were lying to him. They felt so intimidated that they on the spot told me that while they support me, they could no longer speak on my behalf because it was just getting to be too much and did not want to risk their job. So right here I have direct evidence that the manager lied to my face, along with the evidence from yesterday of them lying to me. Problem is that right now it is just a he-said she-said. And tie goes to management every time. Any evidence of my innocence I gather they bury or intimidate into silence. This is not a union company, so I have nobody in my corner to defend me that can't be threatened.
This doesn't feel like something I can win, and the stress is starting to affect me. This feels like a text book case of hostile workplace, but I can't do anything about it. I'm starting to think that just for my mental and physical health I should just quit, because the way it looks, they are trying to get rid of me anyway and will just continue fabricating bullshit until they finally decide to boot me out the door. I think part if not THE reason they are trying to get rid of me is because I am the only full timer in my department, and the rest is part timers, I make a little more than they do, and am eligible for benefits. The company is in pretty dire financial straights, and this could just be a cost cutting measure in the most ass way possible. Otherwise the only other reason I could see them getting rid of a brutally valuable employee is for reasons to pathetic for me to want to entertain the thought of. I don't want to believe that it's just petty Jr. High bullshit factoring in me potentially losing my job. At the very least I do have some emergency funds that could carry me for a little while, though that's not an optimal choice. People don't want to HAVE to dip into their savings. Any thoughts on what I can or should do?
Edit: OH MY GOD! It just dawned on me, I think I know exactly what is happening. I recently complained to the GM about pre-approved time of I had being taken away from me, and how the guys that wrote the schedule didn't care that they were ruining my plans and blew me off. The GM said that it was absolutely unacceptable and that he would have a talk with the responsible parties who handled the scheduling (the two managers). What do you know several days later I'm having a meeting with those two managers telling me what a terrible employee I am. I.. I didn't see it before, but now that the thought popped into my head, it seems just petty and vindictive enough to be the truth...
Suffice to say, I'm a good employee, I do my job, and I get things done. Problem is that on occasion management, and there are a lot of managers, makes unreasonable or untenable requests. And instead of sacrificing my ethics, well being of my department, etc, I let them know that I'm sorry, but I can't follow through with their request. This has put a bee in the bonnet of managers that are used to meek register biscuits doing whatever they demand of them. So yesterday I had a meeting with two managers telling me that there are some issues with my work ethic, performance, professionalism, etc. I promptly called BS and said that if I was a lazy unprofessional employee, that my on paper stats would not be what they were. They hand-waved that aside and said that my revenue numbers and such were not in question, but everything else they mentioned. I then asked for examples, and was able to easily explain them as false and said that there were witnesses that could attest to my innocence. They gave a couple more examples of things that co-workers had said to them about me or said that I have done. I was bemused considering that the co-workers they mentioned were the two people I trusted more than anyone else in the store and had complained more than anyone else about management to me. They basically boiled it down to the old shape up or ship out and ended the meeting.
I then talked to the aforementioned co-workers and not only did they say what was said was complete BS, that they were also willing to speak up on my behalf to confront management on the apparent lies they had just told me in the meeting. We agreed that a frank and honest meeting between management and the involved employees that wanted to speak up was a good idea, considering there was a mounting list of grievances that they wanted to air and see if they would be willing to talk about them. I talked to a couple of other co-workers that had vented to me about issues with the store and management in the past, asking if they too would like to be a part of this meeting. They said yes, but apparently one fearing for their job and wanting to ingratiate themselves to management.. well to put it bluntly, snitched.
I had a couple co-workers come up to me and tell me that one of the managers was going around asking questions about me trying to gather up information for some reason or another. This did not sit well because I could see where this was going. I was later pulled into another meeting to discuss why I'm, "Bullying employees into a meeting they don't want to attend and trying to make them all talk shit about management to make me look better." I explained to him that I did nothing more than asked a couple of co-workers if they would be interested in taking part in a meeting to discuss issues with management, which I believe any employee of any company in the United States should have the right to do. There is nothing wrong with wanting to speak to management in a respectful manner about issues that might be occurring at work. I also brought up, that I find it odd that people are coming to him, when I have people telling me that he is the one going around the store asking about me. He flatly denied that he had been doing that, and even went so far as to say that my name had not even passed his lips with other employees today. I told him that I found that confusing considering what I was being told, what was I supposed to think or believe, and why would they say that to me? He said he didn't know, but it didn't happen. I asked then why was I told what I was told once again, and he then leaned forward with a grin and asked me to give him names then. I solemnly refused such a request, saying that I was not going to throw the people under the bus that were trying to help me.
Shortly after the meeting was over, I had a co-worker come to me and tell me that they had just been very sternly talked to by that manager again, asking if they had told me about the conversation that he had had with them earlier. When they said no, he apparently pushed and asked if they were lying to him. They felt so intimidated that they on the spot told me that while they support me, they could no longer speak on my behalf because it was just getting to be too much and did not want to risk their job. So right here I have direct evidence that the manager lied to my face, along with the evidence from yesterday of them lying to me. Problem is that right now it is just a he-said she-said. And tie goes to management every time. Any evidence of my innocence I gather they bury or intimidate into silence. This is not a union company, so I have nobody in my corner to defend me that can't be threatened.
This doesn't feel like something I can win, and the stress is starting to affect me. This feels like a text book case of hostile workplace, but I can't do anything about it. I'm starting to think that just for my mental and physical health I should just quit, because the way it looks, they are trying to get rid of me anyway and will just continue fabricating bullshit until they finally decide to boot me out the door. I think part if not THE reason they are trying to get rid of me is because I am the only full timer in my department, and the rest is part timers, I make a little more than they do, and am eligible for benefits. The company is in pretty dire financial straights, and this could just be a cost cutting measure in the most ass way possible. Otherwise the only other reason I could see them getting rid of a brutally valuable employee is for reasons to pathetic for me to want to entertain the thought of. I don't want to believe that it's just petty Jr. High bullshit factoring in me potentially losing my job. At the very least I do have some emergency funds that could carry me for a little while, though that's not an optimal choice. People don't want to HAVE to dip into their savings. Any thoughts on what I can or should do?
Edit: OH MY GOD! It just dawned on me, I think I know exactly what is happening. I recently complained to the GM about pre-approved time of I had being taken away from me, and how the guys that wrote the schedule didn't care that they were ruining my plans and blew me off. The GM said that it was absolutely unacceptable and that he would have a talk with the responsible parties who handled the scheduling (the two managers). What do you know several days later I'm having a meeting with those two managers telling me what a terrible employee I am. I.. I didn't see it before, but now that the thought popped into my head, it seems just petty and vindictive enough to be the truth...
Playstation/Origin/GoG: Span_Wolf Xbox/uPlay/Bnet: SpanWolf Nintendo: Span_Wolf SW-7097-4917-9392 Steam: http://steamcommunity.com/id/Span_Wolf/
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As nice as it would be to rise up against horrible, overbearing bosses... it's a retail environment and an economy where jobs are in demand. People will only be willing to risk so much to rise up against them, and the talking with manager about this sounds like it will result in some layoffs no matter what you do (because the manager types are grade A silly geese). And managers will be able to find replacements; no, they won't have your amazing numbers but at this point, they care less about that than the proverbial thorn in their side.
The way you describe your job it doesn't seem to me that that's exactly where you want to be. All the things you said, like being a model employee and enjoying yourself, obviously are important, but with all the other stuff going on, it's not like the job is irreplaceable. That's why I agree with Grimm - shop around and see what's out there, doesn't mean you have to take it.
The other thing is, the meeting was yesterday. And the furore, you think, because of a "recent" complaint. And you are worried for your mental and physical health and right now your co-worker and management and the GM all seem involved. Maybe it's just been a bit of an avalanche and things will calm down, it just seems as though it was a bit too much at once. I honestly feel like the BS from the managers seems so much worse because of the other things you imply - like taking this job rather out of necessity than desire, the concern for the company potentially going under, losing a holiday you might actually really need. If I'm wrong, that's good for both of us, but if I'm right, maybe your focusing on a small part to a bigger problem.
Home Inspection and Wind Mitigation
http://www.FairWindInspections.com/
And to those that have mentioned it, I have indeed already put in 3 different applications. Going to see if I can climb my way back up into the game industry. I just have to accept the truth that I might be unemployed for a little while again.
Certainly wish you the best of luck, for what it's worth. Both with your conversation with the GM and your applications. And since you've made your decision and my pointing this out can't do any harm anymore: I really believe your reaction is the result of more frustration than just those two dickheads. Worrying about the financial status of the store, putting a lot of effort into it and getting no recognition, and that for a job out of necessity rather than desire.
But get well soon, this seems to have really shaken you up.
It’s not a very important country most of the time
http://steamcommunity.com/id/mortious
You seem to like the job, and are good at it. If there's another store nearby and the GM can arrange that, would that be a possibility?
Edit: Otherwise, depending on the personal financial situation, I'd get out as soon as possible. Physical and mental effects don't just disappear the instant you quit, so getting out earlier will mean that you're ready for a new job earlier.
It’s not a very important country most of the time
http://steamcommunity.com/id/mortious
Well the best option would be wacky hijinks, getting the managers fired, becoming the new manager and getting the cute cashier who's pretty but doesn't think she's pretty. Unfortunate life is not a 90s movie
It’s not a very important country most of the time
http://steamcommunity.com/id/mortious
At worst you can get another retail job (and with this much aggravation your current one certainly is not worth it)
At best HR can slap your management team and tell them to stop hurting well performing sales numbers by being petty and childish.
If you have not laid out the details to your GM though, going to him first would be a good idea.
This kind of behavior is not just damaging to you but to the company as a whole and if the company is worth your time they will respond to your concerns.
If not, then your better to get out.
Get a journal and write down everything that happens each day. You sales, the actions of management, what they are asking you to do, what they are accusing you of.
Go around to any shopping mall, you might be surprised how many are hiring. Retail has massive turnover which is why you can always get a job there.
With the starting of school, students will be dropping out of jobs to concentrate on school and the holiday season is coming up, so right now is a good time to get your foot n the door somewhere else.
For example, those stats you mentioned? Get a copy of those! As many going back as far as you can. This proves your performance is just fine until "something" happened. Now is the time for black ops at work, lull them into thinking you are less of a threat while you collect what you need. It will be much easier now than when you no longer have access to the work site.
IANAL, but that could be grounds for immediate termination.
He said that I should call the GM (already the plan), lay out what's happening, and then inform him I can no longer work in that environment. Instead of turning that into a resignation, say that I'd like to be transferred to another store. If he says yes, then great. If he drags his feet I'll request a leave of absense. Problem with that is that I fall under most the requirements for FMLA except for time worked. I've been at this company about 11 months, and you need to have been with the company for a year before your are eligable. Problem is sticking around just so that I could be eligable for a leave of absence in another month would defeat the purpose of the leave of absence to begin with. So I'm going to ask for it and see what is said.
Incredibly best case scenario, I let the GM know what's going on and ask for a transfer, and he comes down like the hammer of the Gods on the two guys responsible for all this. Hopeful scenario, is that I ask for the transfer and he acquiesces, giving me a fresh start at a new store. Worst case scenario, he doesn't transfer me, I don't get the leave, and nothing gets fixed. I just shut myself off emotionally, become a robot, and do what is asked of me without question regardless.
If they continue to try to screw with me accusing me of this and that without cause, I just simply say, "If you say so, but I dissagree. May I get back to work now?" Just don't give them an inch. Oh and if they want to have any more private meetings with me, whip out a recording device and let them know I'll be recording what is said. If they protest, just say that this is for our protection, they have an entire company backing them, I do not. This is to make sure there are no missunderstandings on what is and is not said in meetings. If they continue to push back, just say that we can re-convene, as soon as they no longer have an issue with the recording device.
You're an employee at a retail store. You're obviously a good one, nobody's calling that into question. However, as a sub-management employee, it is not your job to participate in the politics of the company hierarchy. Furthermore, if you plan to advance to management, you need to play the game, not overturn the table. That's an unfortunate reality of life.
Now, if you are being mistreated by management, of course that changes the story a little bit. But, here are a couple of things you said:
"...managers that are used to meek register biscuits doing whatever they demand of them."
This would make sense, considering you are literally being hired to do the tasks asked of you by managers. That is your job. If they make an untenable request it is absolutely above and beyond the call of duty for you to advise them that their request is not going to bear fruit, but it is beyond the scope of your job description to refuse. They are not paying you to make decisions, they are paying you to work as directed.
"This doesn't feel like something I can win..."
This also makes sense, considering you are below management, and both decision making and handling of employee obedience is the purview of management. You feel suffocated by your manager and I can empathize with that. I really can- a transfer is perhaps the best option for you since it sounds like the work environment you have right now has gone quite toxic.
However, don't stress out about politics. You shouldn't even take part in them! When you transfer, the best advice I can give you is to speak your mind, but do not disobey. They are not paying you as a consultant. You need to befriend your managers, even if they are incompetent. After all, in all likelihood they are just following orders from farther up the chain. It's not dishonest to be on good terms with a bad boss. Its good practice.
Try to calm down, and get a transfer is my best advice to you. But once you get to your new place, either calm down and stop refusing to do what's asked of you (even if, and I know the feeling, it is an impossible task), or play the politics game appropriately in order to advance to management. If that's even possible at your company.
Don't say this last bit. If this become an unemployment case you do not want anything that even vaguely sounds like "I quit". Say something like "inform him it feels like ahostile work environment, could I please be transferred?" Hostile work environment is one of those important phrases in employment law.
Other than that, it sounds like your best plan of action.
I need this job right now to be able to support myself, and possibly talking to the GM right now when it could all just blow over if I keep my head down (or get far worse) could really escalate things. Especially if he is complicit in everything that is going on. I'm thinking of giving it all another chance and if another incident happens then I go right to him, no ifs, ands, or buts. No more fighting back in self defense, no more trying to gather employees to speak up on the truth of the state of the store, just smile, let them do their thing, and then right to the GM to ask for a transfer. After that if he wants to hear why, then air dirty laundry.
Then I'm thinking of making a type-written note for those two managers simply saying, "There has been some missinformation going about in the store recently, but that has passed. There is no need to rehash or propagate it, what is important is the store and customers. I am now just here to work, and do my job to the best of my abilities, and to the same standard that I always have. I am a team player and will remain as such." It will be a bit longer than that, but that's the jist of it, an olive branch of sorts.
To clarify the comment about the hesitation, is a moment's hesitation when I'm in the middle of doing something and they ask me to do something else. The mental shifting of the tracks that makes them think I don't want to do it, because I didn't drop a box of plates instantly and turn on a heel when they ask me to do something while I'm busy.
I kinda agree with Rend in that the attitude that you at least show here shows a bit of an attitude regarding work. A lot of the things you wrote read to me like you feel you're better than this job-and hey, you might be, but if that's how it comes across in your day to day thing, I can sort of see why some people might be rubbed the wrong way by it.
I mean this with no offense, because for the majority of my work life, I did retail too. In fact, it almost sounds like I worked at a very similar place like you right now. The thing that helped me get through it is remember this;
Its retail.
It's great that you have morals and an upstanding work attitude, but unless you're hoping to move up with this company, they don't matter for shit. The moment you leave or get fired, they'll forget you and just have someone else come in and do the same job you were doing.
Leave this thing alone. Nothing good is going to come out of you talking to them any further or giving them notes or trying to talk to the GM. If anything, I would say only bad things are going to happen, because as much as it sucks, they probably already made up their mind about you, and you doing all this is only going to keep shining a light on you.
As an employee, you're just a throwaway staff member. They don't value employees who go above and beyond if they don't also fall in line and take whatever management throws at them. Take this as a reminder that you want to get out of retail.
100% percent this.
You have a great work ethic. Its an awesome thing to have and a good company will value it.
Save it for a job that will actually care if you bust your arse. This place does not so screw 'em. Turn up, do what's required and don't disagree with management if you think they're wrong. Just do what they say and when you get home from work, brush up that CV and look for a new job.
Honestly, I wouldn't send then letters or anything. They can decide to interpret pretty much whatever you say any way they want to, and I think you've done enough talking, maybe even more than you should have. If you want to keep this shitty job for whatever reason, or just keep it till you get another one, shut up, do the minimum you need to do to get by, and work on a transfer or find a different company.
Just going to do my job now and shut up, even in the face of terminal retardation.
They really don't, and this kind of short-sighted devaluing of human capital is one of the reasons retailers are on the outs. http://www.csmonitor.com/2007/0416/p13s02-wmgn.html is one of the reasons circuit city failed, because they made their retail experience suck and took out all the people who knew how to do things.
I doubt a transfer will do the trick, either. You'll end up flattening boxes somewhere else, while you want to be doing something else.
And if it's video games you are committed to and the industry you love, isn't there at least a couple of contacts you've made over your ten years that you could poke for job opportunities? Just asking won't hurt.
Naturally there are more unknown factors than known ones, but I got the impression that you're high-strung by your job. As mentioned before, this seemed to have gone down in a relatively short time span, and you've oscillated between and contemplated a dozen scenarios.
Disclaimer: I'm probably wrong. I don't know you, and you know best.
Buuuut in the end none of that really matters because I start my new job on Monday, as the PR Coordinator for a major game studio! I'm leaving the name out so that my new job doesn't get associated in any way with this bitch fest of a thread. And yes, I quit my current job, JUST like Peter quit the Pawtucket Brewery when he won the lottery.