The Fourth (Almost) Annual Phalla Awards
You recieve the envelope in the mail. It is golden and simple, yet elegant. There is no return address. You flip the envelope over, eager to see what is inside. A wax steal stops your finger as it slides through the seam between the envelope and its flap. In the crimson design, you can make out what seems to be an angel made out of the letters I N and F. One of the angel's outstretched wings seems to have a stylized SOE and the other has TRV incorporated into it. What could this possibly be?
You rush inside and sit down, eager to see exactly what this is all about. Inside, there is a black card with simple white writing.
Come to mourn the passing and honor the lives of three Phallateers!
December 10th, 2012
Penny Arcade Hall
Ceremony to follow viewing
People have died? That's terrible! Based on the initials you can deduce that it was Infidel, SaberOverEasy, and TheRoadVirus. With great haste you arrange for time off of work, as well as lining up some people to water your dogs and walk the bushes for you.
As you pull up to the hall on the day of the ceremony, you are amazed at the turnout. Well, not too amazed. These guys were pretty awesome. You walk in and find a seat with your name on it. You sit down and take a look at the program. It seems that you missed the viewing of the bodies but are just in time for... the reading of the will? You don't think you need to be here for that, right? I mean, you weren't particularly close-
"Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you for attending," says a man you didn't notice before. He seems to have just.... appeared. "My name is Sir Ellingston Hallstings Dingdingworth the 3rd. I worked as manservant for these three gentlemen. I must say that my life seems to have little meaning without them, and that I am envious of heaven in its acquisition of the analytical, sarcastic, and sometimes insane angels that it has added to its ranks. If you are here, that means that you too have been blessed by knowing these truly maginficent individuals."
He produces a large briefcase seemingly out of thin air and slams it down onto the podium. "NOW, let us get down to business, shall we? Seeing as most of you knew these men from their Phalla careers, they decided that the bequeathing of their posessions should be done in a manner you will all be familiar with. We will go through categories two at a time. First, you will nominate yourselves or each other for these possessions, and will then vote on those with the greatest number of votes. We will continue in this fashion until all of the estate has been distributed.
The first round of nominations will close at 11PM on Monday, December 10th. Please help yourself to cheese platters and selections from the deceased’s wine cellars in the meantime. "
- Vote will close at 11 PM EST every day for the duration of the awards.
- Vote in an appropriate color for each award and make it clear which award you are nominating or voting for if there are two.
- Inactivus hungers, but we have some pretty sweet shielding over the ceremony, so don't sweat it!
- Any direct quoting of Role PM's may result in courteous shushing and mean stares.
- All pro board made during this game must be linked to the hosts, and they must be pretty damn great
- This is about roasting and toasting, not flaming and shaming. Speak your mind, but don't be the rain on our glorious parade
- We are looking for classy gents and dames for guest narration. If you’d like to class up (or party down) this shindig, let us know via PM!
- Games that are in progress may not be discussed.
Everybody who has ever played.
These awards cover the period since the last phalla awards (August 2010). All games ending after August the 7th 2010 and before December 8th, 2012 are eligible. Phalla games from any PA Board are eligible if run during this time period.
For Reference, this is all mains between “It’s a Prinnyful Life” and “Unknown Armies” and all minis between “Competing Host Phalla” and “Phalla of Monkey Island.”
The list of old games can be found here
is a link to the previous awards.
CesareB wins Most Veteran Play by a New Player (Baby With a Shotgun) Award for Village of Phallandia!
Munkus Beaver wins The Best or Most Exciting or Coolest or Most Epic Role Claim or Reveal (The "IT IS I, INACTIVUS" Award) for MURDERBOT!
Premium wins Most Improved Player (The "sniff... They grow up so fast... Now to mafia kill him day 1...") Award!
Bedlam wins Most Hilarious Single Blunder or Meltdown by a Player or Team in a Single Game (All according to plan Award)!
Langly and INANTP win Best Duo/Team (Spectrum 5 Award)!
Cythraul and ObiFett win for Best Betrayal!
INANTP wins Best Writing By a Host or Co-Host (The Bestselling Novelist Award)for Cereal Killer/Phalla of Cables
Egos wins Memiest Meme/Most Graphic Graphic (The Hilarious award) for his CRAZY mafia proboard diagram
PHA/LLA wins Most Innovative Game Mechanics (The well its really a tabletop wargame award)!
The Phalla where Alegis got Ringo killed by Darian wins Most Chaotic Single Day for the night where Infidel got confirmed by Infidel
Serial Killer Convention wins Best Mini!
Arivia wins Best Abuse of Game Mechanics (I read the OP award)!
PHA/LLA wins Best Main!
Langly wins Best Player!
Bonus Awards (in some order and timeframe according to whim)
Will be announced in the previous days narration!
Questions I have for you
Are we missing anything critical that should be represented here? Of course not! We're great! (Tell us anyway)
The awards will follow last year's model. Nominations will occur one day. Any nomination which is seconded will be available for vote the next day. Please provide a link (if applicable or available) to give people a more informed choice.
Congratulations to all our Winners!
Do you want to narrate a night? Of course you do. PM me.