Edit - I am beyond the ability to discuss this rationally and am having a traumatic emotional response to something. Help me not make any mistakes and lock this.
I can't fucking take it anymore. I have to get this off my chest. Again. Alcohol use. Fucking. Blows nuts.
It upsets me. It upsets me to the point of tears in some cases. Because in damn near every case of people I know who drink, they change dramatically for that period of being drunk. And when they're sober, they're fine with seeking that change in personality. They are aware of everything but continue to do it. And I don't. Fucking. Get it.
I'm sick and tired of the fucking excuses of, "Oh, it makes everything else more fun!" If things are fun to begin with, what's with the need of alcohol in the equation? If you're having a blast with your friends watching a film, or just having a conversation, or while out camping, or whatever the fuck, why or how does alcohol enhance that? I got railed on this forum in the past for suggesting that alcohol alters the state of mind, but when it came to that question I just asked, all the responses were, "It just does." And fuck trying to be a nice guy about it, here it is - I'm pretty sure people are in fucking denial about why they drink.
We know that alcohol screws with people's decision making. We know of all the fucking trouble it leads to and the health problems that come with it. That's not extrapolation, that's fucking fact. But for some reason, those factors make things more 'fun'? What am I not getting? Please, someone enlighten me, because the one time I was drunk in my life, it resulted in the same thing alcohol does to the rest of my family - a needlessly confrontational asshole.
Not that everyone becomes that personality when drunk, but very few people seem to maintain themselves and who they are when drunk. Everyone else becomes something else. And I lose all ability to relate to friends and family or other loved ones. I'm suddenly meeting strangers. A person who was more docile and humble will become some freakish attention whore. Someone who is quick-witted and hysterical will become some mutated hate-monger. And these changes are perceived as good. Not just by the people themselves, but by other people who drink, who may or may not be present. "It's good to cut loose man!" What? To the extent of embarrassing yourself massively? To causing strife in relationships you have with others, either through a senseless argument or actual physical confrontation?
And the permissive attitudes toward alcohol abuse fucking astound me. I'd written on this forum before about my best friend - or former at this point - who had gotten black-out drunk one night. The next day, he wrote about his regret, and I responded to him in support of cutting back on drinking. Not stopping drinking. I promoted moderation. And what do I get in response? An angry tirade about how I'm trying to be his mom, rather than a friend urging caution. This happened twice, and when the second instance of this happened earlier this year, I said "Fuck it" and haven't spoken to him sense. I'm tired of trying to reason with an alcoholic who doesn't want my help. I'm tired of urging someone who, when sober, recognizes a problem in his life. But when it comes close to evening time, to socialize, fuck all those realizations and rationalizations. So when I come to the forum about the fight, what do people tell me, in Help / Advice no less? They tell me I was in the wrong. I was wrong, because in a moment of clarity for my friend, I urged controlled behavior.
But the absolute worst thing about alcohol is the seething behavior of trying to get other people to do it. Even after people know about my reason for not drinking anymore, when they're drunk, they seem to forget it all and say, "Come on Henry, just ONE drink!" It is a sick behavior. And it poisons lives. Over the last six, seven years, I've watched someone very close to me eventually get talked into drinking. And now I have to endure the evenings she's around to talk to, but is tanked. We don't have the same sorts of conversations when she's tanked, and they're not fun. And her slurring and change in personality fucking hurt. But after the above episode with my best friend, now it's like... I've been trained by people - my friends, family, and internet - that trying to convince her to take it easy on the drinking (not even stopping) is wrong of me to do.
So fuck me I guess. Fuck me hard.
Centrism is just the cowardly way to be a bigot w/o being explicit about it.
American politics isn't 4D chess, it's just if you give a shit about other people or not.