Better, but still trying

Minoko

This was my first comic posted back in March last year



And this was one done last week.

Drawing every day since I started my comic has helped me improve, but there's still a lot I could work on.
I'd like to here what criticisms you have of the newer image and where I could improve.
Also I'd like to know if having a better/more expensive tablet helps with cleaner lines/better artwork as my current tablet is pretty basic and an looking to upgrade

Thanks all

DirtyDirtyVagrant

First one reminds me of Penny Arcade. Like a lot. The second one, not so much. But in both cases the writing is a little weak. Fortunately we also have a subforum for writers!

Also, without getting too in depth (because I'm typing with one finger), I'm not sure your art skills are adequate just yet. There are a lot of resources available here, so you're in luck. Learn to draw real, actual things with a pencil. Still lifes, figures, landscapes, etc. This well help the quality of your comic immensely, I promise.

Put your tablet plans on the back burner and focus on color (no, not colorado. god damn autocorrect) after you've nailed down tone and value.

MagicToaster

In the second comic, in the second panel, it looks like the guy is opening a bag of chips. Be careful with that. Also, I wonder what that girl would look like if you took off her shirt. I don't mean in a sexy way, I mean her boobs are really oddly shaped.

Minoko

Thank you kindly

Minoko

With this one I had to swap who was speaking first after panel 1 so I had a go with Scott Kurtz' oft used silhouette. It's a little off but I think the shading, even the simple stuff I've put in panels 2 and 3 make the images look better than the strip I posted a Monty or so ago. Or am I blowing smoke up my own backside?

Peas

Hmmm I'm not an expert but your characters really reminds me of Penny Arcade

Minoko

Yeah these were the original 2 and PA has been a big influence, I mixed it up with an alien and a bear since then though. I should probably split these two up in future.

TheJoe

The one thing that hurts my eyes is between panel 2 and 3, the only difference I can spot is the eyes moved. I know many people are going to clone the panels, but one thing besides dialogue should be changed just for flavor. Something simple like having the guy point to the pad with his finger would help I think.

Minoko

Yes, good point. Now you've said it I can see that it stands out. If I duplicate a panel it at the sketch stage before I ink, but this one hasn't got enough change. Any comments on the colouring?

TheJoe

You're asking the wrong man for colouring - I'm part colorblind and still haven't found a comfortable way to color on my own.

m3nace

What's up with the bandaged frame-borders?

Minoko

@m3nace It was a joke in my first year doing the strip, I liked the quirk so I kept it. I would put up the strip where it happened but I hate the artwork in it.