[PA Comic] Friday, January 18, 2013 - Sportz

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  • -Tal-Tal Registered User regular
    maybe on monday they'll make a comic about going to the gym

    or drinking a beer

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  • FalxFalx Registered User regular
    N-no!

  • SmrtnikSmrtnik job boli zub Registered User regular
    skim172 wrote: »
    Falx wrote: »
    Football is really just an RTS game.

    I enthusiastically disagree. Football is clearly turn-based tactical strategy, with cooperative multiplayer real-time action elements. Observe:
    Football has two Commanders (coaches), each of whom have available about 50 Players on their Team. The objective is to score more Victory Points than the other Team. Victory Points are scored by carrying the Bomb (the football) to the opposing Team's Base (end zone) on the other side of the Map (field). In between the Bases are 100 Capture Points (yards) - advancing the Bomb is done by gaining and holding Capture Points.

    On each Turn, or "down," there is an Activation and an Attack/Defend round. In the Activation Round, Commanders select and deploy 11 Players and give them commands. In the Attack/Defend Round, the Players will execute these orders. How well each Player executes their commands depends on their character sheet (ability scores, stamina, morale, and experience levels) and, obviously, player skill. Positive and negative buffs can affect these statistics (Fatigued, Injured, Motivated, Berserk [Rivalry Game], Berserk [Roid Rage], Bad Turf, etc).

    Only the Team currently in possession of the Bomb may initiate an attack. The Attacking Team has 4 Turns before their Possession expires. The Turn can be extended by gaining 10 Capture Points, in which case, their Turn total is reset to 4. When their Possession expires, the Bomb reverses to the other Team, who are then on Attack.

    The game is Turn-Based strategy for the Coaches, but Real-Time Tactical for the Players, who, in each Turn, must either capture territory (on Attack) or kill the Bomb-carrier (on Defense). There are multiple player classes, and Football's innovative character creation system allows for a wide variety of custom hybrid classes, but they generally break down into "Runner, Receiver, Ranged, and Tank" on Attack and "Heavy, Raider, and Interceptor" on Defense.

    To Capture a Point, a Player must carry the Bomb through enemies until they are brought down. Runners carry the Bomb, Tanks protect the Bomb-carrier and try to keep them alive for as long as possible. If a Bomb-carrier's knee or elbow touches the ground, they are dead, and a new Turn begins. Alternatively, a Ranged Player (who can also carry the Bomb) attempts to fire the Bomb through the air; Receivers are spies who infiltrate enemy territory to paint a target for the Bomb to hit. If the Bomb safely reaches the Receiver, all the territory in-between the two Points is gained.

    Once the Bomb has reached the opponents' Base, Victory Points are awarded. There are two ways to accomplish this. One is to Launch (kick) the Bomb at the opponent's Base. This can only be done by a special Ranged player-class known as the Kicker, which has low statistics, defenses, and health. The Kicker is the only class with the Launch ability, which takes 2-4 seconds to cast, during which time the Kicker must be protected by the Team. If the Launch is long enough and accurate enough, 3 Victory Points are awarded.

    The other scoring option is to carry the Bomb all the way to the Base by capturing every Capture Point. This awards 6 Victory Points. The Attacking Team will then have one Bonus Turn (extra point) to score bonus points, either by launching or carrying the Bomb.

    Alternative, if the Attacking Team doubts their ability to extend their Possession or successfully fire the Bomb at the Base, they can choose to execute a Punt - a strategic option to give up Possession in exchange for territory.

    On Defense, the objective is to kill the Bomb-carrier and stop the opposing Commander from gaining territory. Heavies are slow, but strong - generally intended to attack Tanks. Interceptors are speedy, but weak - generally intended to hunt down Receivers. Raiders are in-between and are generally tasked as the "Bomb-killers" - the ones who target the Bomb-carriers. Defense can either stymie the Attackers until Possession runs out or they can attempt to steal the Bomb for themselves. If a Carrier drops the Bomb before dying or if a launch is seized by an Interceptor, the Defense can then immediately advance the Bomb, in real-time, in the other direction, gaining territory or even breaching the opponent Base themselves, gaining 6 Victory Points in the process. If the Defender carrying the ball is killed before reaching the Base, their Team immediately is given Possession at the site of the kill.

    After the Victory Points are awarded, the Map resets. The Game is divided into 4 Quarters, each lasting 15 minutes. Teams can use Time-outs to temporarily pause the time limit, for strategic purposes - either to gain more time to think about their next move, to rest and heal Fatigued or Injured Players, or to allow more time for the Activation Round. After all 4 quarters are finished, the cumulative total of Victory Points determines the winner.


    It's actually a lot like a Magic-type card game, in a way, from the perspective of the coaches.
    See, I'm one that knows so little of the rules of American football that I actually learned something from this. And it sounds interesting.

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  • Groosenat0rGroosenat0r http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sy70Z6x00TM SkyloftRegistered User regular
    Nonsense! Pure balderdash and poppycock!

  • MichaelLCMichaelLC In what furnace was thy brain? ChicagoRegistered User regular
    So if I got this right, dog fighting is a side quest and brain damage is a permanent intelligence effect?

  • KingAdrockKingAdrock Registered User regular
    Football? Don't they mean Handegg?

    Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned for Sega.
  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    KingAdrock wrote: »
    Football? Don't they mean Handegg?

    oh here we go

  • BlackDoveBlackDove Registered User regular
    Did I ever tell you about what the sport is named in Europe, and how the American name for what is essentially rugby with shoulder pads is inappro-

    *gets gagged and taken away by men in suits*

  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    KingAdrock wrote: »
    Football? Don't they mean Handegg?

    probably not

  • crazysteve5575crazysteve5575 Registered User regular
    This comics bears striking similarity's to
    http://www.reallifecomics.com/archive/121026.html

    Still pretty funny.

  • TofystedethTofystedeth Registered User regular
    Holy crap, Real Life Comics is still going? Man, I haven't read that in ages.

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  • EnlongEnlong Registered User regular
    I've not had a very great relationship with football games.

    As a repeated member of marching band, I eventually came to consider the game as standing between me and the halftime show. Really became aware of just how often that freaking clock stops.

  • MUNIMUNI Registered User regular
    punto wrote: »
    I don't see why he's so surprised, the other day they were both playing "Medal of Duty" or whatever, this was just an inevitable follow up.

    get a load of this guy

  • FalxFalx Registered User regular
    You've got no room to be going around pointing at dumb posts.

  • MUNIMUNI Registered User regular
    edited January 2013
    Falx wrote: »
    You've got no room to be going around pointing at dumb posts.


    DID I FUCKING ASK YOU????????????????????????????

    YOU GOTTA LOTTA GUTS ANSWERING QUESTIONS I DIDN'T ASK, MISTER.

    MUNI on
  • FalxFalx Registered User regular
    Good riddance.

  • ObstreperousObstreperous Registered User regular
    "The quarterback is a wizard"
    I may be mistaken, but you may have been the first human being to ever utter those words. In that order.

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