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Posts

  • surrealitychecksurrealitycheck lonely, but not unloved dreaming of faulty keys and latchesRegistered User regular
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Vaginal discharge is my greatest fear

    It's real, get over it. human bodies, etc

    the greatest trick vaginal discharge ever played on mankind was convincing them it didnt exist

    obF2Wuw.png
  • So It GoesSo It Goes We keep moving...Registered User regular
    Senjutsu wrote: »
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Senjutsu wrote: »
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Senjutsu wrote: »
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Everyone drunk screwdrivers and watch magic mike with me

    Friends are coming over and then we are going to a club

    no male stripper movies tonight

    The worst

    You haven't met our friends!

    Bring them to America you heathen

    They're getting married in Vegas next week!

    God dammit

  • BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    BeNarwhal wrote: »
    Holy crap

    Let me preface this by saying i am not generally grossed out by bodily fluids

    However, tonight i was helping the wife undress (40 weeks pregnant) and my head got a little too close to her crotch area. I got a whiff of her vaginal discharge and it was so pungeant that I physically retched right there. I have never smelt anything so foul.

    Naturally once i had recovered i raced off to share with chat

    This is magical

    Man, that baby should be coming out soon then, huh? You ready? :) (New uncle, don't mind me)

    This is #2 so im not nearly as nervous. Really excited about it though! Plus i get my wife back (both pregnancies have been extremely hard on her due to 24/7 nausea and vomiting through the whole 40 weeks)

    Ugh, that sucks about the nausea. :( My Sis-in-law had a really smooth pregnancy (her first), though now she's having a harder time being a new mom :P

    They didn't take the whole "You won't sleep" thing seriously enough.

    Congrats on #2 though! (Poop joke!)

  • Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    Senjutsu wrote: »
    wait no sir landshark just killed my ability to have sexy fun forever

    BRO IVE GOT SOME STORIES LET ME TELL YOU

    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
  • QuidQuid Definitely not a banana Registered User regular
    Senjutsu wrote: »
    wait no sir landshark just killed my ability to have sexy fun forever

    WHAT DID HE DO TO MY WIFE?

  • So It GoesSo It Goes We keep moving...Registered User regular
    Sarksus wrote: »
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Vaginal discharge is my greatest fear

    It's real, get over it. human bodies, etc

    You don't like anal/poop

    get over it!

    I feel this is more acceptable than hating vaginas

  • Ravenhpltc24Ravenhpltc24 So Raven Registered User regular
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Vaginal discharge is my greatest fear

    Yeah but it's also lube you don't have to pay for or apply. The pregnancy-based kind sounds pretty wretched, however.

    (V) ( ;,,; ) (V)
  • SarksusSarksus ATTACK AND DETHRONE GODRegistered User regular
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Vaginal discharge is my greatest fear

    It's real, get over it. human bodies, etc

    You don't like anal/poop

    get over it!

    I feel this is more acceptable than hating vaginas

    I don't hate vaginas!

  • BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    All y'all getting squicked out by bodily fluids

    Like Sir Landshark says,

    I got some stories.

  • Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    Worst part of pregnancies (for a dude) is being the one who has to go out and buy what shes craving at all hours of the day/night

    luckily it was only Slurpees, Twix and Skittles.

    We live right next to a convenience store so it was mostly ok

    One time we did drive around the city looking for a dairy queen that served hamburgers because that was what she was craving. A hamburger specifically from dairy queen.

    Turns out there isn't one!

    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
  • SarksusSarksus ATTACK AND DETHRONE GODRegistered User regular
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Vaginal discharge is my greatest fear

    Yeah but it's also lube you don't have to pay for or apply. The pregnancy-based kind sounds pretty wretched, however.

    Yeah, I"m not talking about the stuff that is normally around. I mean like, THE STUFF, like what Landshark is talking about.

  • QuidQuid Definitely not a banana Registered User regular
    Sarksus wrote: »
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Vaginal discharge is my greatest fear

    It's real, get over it. human bodies, etc

    You don't like anal/poop

    get over it!

    I feel this is more acceptable than hating vaginas

    I don't hate vaginas!

    I do.

    With their damn crotch snot.

  • tyrannustyrannus i am not fat Registered User regular
    Worst part of pregnancies (for a dude) is being the one who has to go out and buy what shes craving at all hours of the day/night

    luckily it was only Slurpees, Twix and Skittles.

    We live right next to a convenience store so it was mostly ok

    One time we did drive around the city looking for a dairy queen that served hamburgers because that was what she was craving. A hamburger specifically from dairy queen.

    Turns out there isn't one!
    it was good of you to look anyway

  • SarksusSarksus ATTACK AND DETHRONE GODRegistered User regular
    Worst part of pregnancies (for a dude) is being the one who has to go out and buy what shes craving at all hours of the day/night

    luckily it was only Slurpees, Twix and Skittles.

    We live right next to a convenience store so it was mostly ok

    One time we did drive around the city looking for a dairy queen that served hamburgers because that was what she was craving. A hamburger specifically from dairy queen.

    Turns out there isn't one!

    My god, what if she craves something that doesn't exist. Like breakfast from Wendy's

  • bloodyroarxxbloodyroarxx Casa GrandeRegistered User regular
    tyrannus wrote: »
    Worst part of pregnancies (for a dude) is being the one who has to go out and buy what shes craving at all hours of the day/night

    luckily it was only Slurpees, Twix and Skittles.

    We live right next to a convenience store so it was mostly ok

    One time we did drive around the city looking for a dairy queen that served hamburgers because that was what she was craving. A hamburger specifically from dairy queen.

    Turns out there isn't one!
    it was good of you to look anyway

    You act like he had a choice dude

  • BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    The most adorable thing about my Sis-in-law when she was near the end of her pregnancy (I was living w/ them at the time)

    Is that she's pretty darn short (5'0"), and she was pretty big

    So she'd drop something on the floor

    And she couldn't pick it up

    She'd just sigh and look sad

    And she'd be so happy when I picked it up for her

    The little things.

  • SenjutsuSenjutsu thot enthusiast Registered User regular
    You are all horrible people vaginas are great why would you try to ruin greatness

  • surrealitychecksurrealitycheck lonely, but not unloved dreaming of faulty keys and latchesRegistered User regular
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Vaginal discharge is my greatest fear

    It's real, get over it. human bodies, etc

    You don't like anal/poop

    get over it!

    I feel this is more acceptable than hating vaginas

    no

    i have a butt

    i have communed with it

    the vagina is a strange and foreign land full of teeth and alien putrescence

    U CANNOT TRIX ME WITH UR PRO VAGINA LIES

    obF2Wuw.png
  • Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    Organichu wrote: »
    Holy crap

    Let me preface this by saying i am not generally grossed out by bodily fluids

    However, tonight i was helping the wife undress (40 weeks pregnant) and my head got a little too close to her crotch area. I got a whiff of her vaginal discharge and it was so pungeant that I physically retched right there. I have never smelt anything so foul.

    Naturally once i had recovered i raced off to share with chat

    i wonder if this is what happens when your wife does a kegel at the same moment that your third trimester son takes a shit

    Now that i think about, that shit has to go somewhere! And he's basically knocking on the vaginal door at this point, so it could be!

    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
  • TaminTamin Registered User regular
    I am imagining BeNarwhal as Kane.

    I will not be viewing any bald pics or videos to dissuade me of this notion.

  • BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    Vaginas do have teeth

    That part is true

  • SarksusSarksus ATTACK AND DETHRONE GODRegistered User regular
    Vaginas are very complicated and that can be intimidating but I don't hate them ;(

  • descdesc Goretexing to death Registered User regular
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Vaginal discharge is my greatest fear

    It's real, get over it. human bodies, etc

    You don't like anal/poop

    get over it!

    I feel this is more acceptable than hating vaginas

    no

    i have a butt

    i have communed with it

    the vagina is a strange and foreign land full of teeth and alien putrescence

    U CANNOT TRIX ME WITH UR PRO VAGINA LIES

    As a vagina lobbyist,

  • Casual EddyCasual Eddy The Astral PlaneRegistered User regular
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Vaginal discharge is my greatest fear

    It's real, get over it. human bodies, etc

    You don't like anal/poop

    get over it!

    I feel this is more acceptable than hating vaginas

    worry about vaginal discharge during sex and worrying about poop butt during anal strike me as largely the same thing!

  • OrganichuOrganichu poops peesRegistered User, Moderator mod
    i am comfortable being around basically everything that comes out of a woman (in minimal quantities some of it, of course) except vomit. i have a really weak stomach when it comes to vomit or gagging noises.

    i'll put my mouth all over a butt or a 'gina any time of month though.

  • QuidQuid Definitely not a banana Registered User regular
    BeNarwhal wrote: »
    Vaginas do have teeth

    That part is true

    Sometimes there is a viper.

  • mrflippymrflippy Registered User regular
    .
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Worst part of pregnancies (for a dude) is being the one who has to go out and buy what shes craving at all hours of the day/night

    luckily it was only Slurpees, Twix and Skittles.

    We live right next to a convenience store so it was mostly ok

    One time we did drive around the city looking for a dairy queen that served hamburgers because that was what she was craving. A hamburger specifically from dairy queen.

    Turns out there isn't one!

    My god, what if she craves something that doesn't exist. Like breakfast from Wendy's

    I'm missing the joke here.

  • BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    Tamin wrote: »
    I am imagining BeNarwhal as Kane.

    I will not be viewing any bald pics or videos to dissuade me of this notion.

    Like, the wrestler?

    Because add about a foot to my height and

    Yeah, pretty much

    It's not the best look for me :P

  • QuidQuid Definitely not a banana Registered User regular
    I have cleaned up so much lady vomit.

    It's brutally unfair that I make it to the toilet every time.

  • SarksusSarksus ATTACK AND DETHRONE GODRegistered User regular
    Organichu wrote: »
    i am comfortable being around basically everything that comes out of a woman (in minimal quantities some of it, of course) except vomit. i have a really weak stomach when it comes to vomit or gagging noises.

    i'll put my mouth all over a butt or a 'gina any time of month though.

    We are aware of your proclivities, Organichu.

  • Ravenhpltc24Ravenhpltc24 So Raven Registered User regular
    I like how we're discussing vaginas, it's a nice change from the nightly penis symposium.

    (V) ( ;,,; ) (V)
  • TaminTamin Registered User regular
    BeNarwhal wrote: »
    Tamin wrote: »
    I am imagining BeNarwhal as Kane.

    I will not be viewing any bald pics or videos to dissuade me of this notion.

    Like, the wrestler?

    Because add about a foot to my height and

    Yeah, pretty much

    It's not the best look for me :P

    Kane, leader of the Brotherhood of Nod.

  • SenjutsuSenjutsu thot enthusiast Registered User regular
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Vaginas are very complicated and that can be intimidating but I don't hate them ;(

    vaginas are fine and not intimidating

    pregnancy is a Lovecraftian horror show, however

  • BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    Tamin wrote: »
    BeNarwhal wrote: »
    Tamin wrote: »
    I am imagining BeNarwhal as Kane.

    I will not be viewing any bald pics or videos to dissuade me of this notion.

    Like, the wrestler?

    Because add about a foot to my height and

    Yeah, pretty much

    It's not the best look for me :P

    Kane, leader of the Brotherhood of Nod.

    Oh!

    No, closer to the wrestler.

  • QuidQuid Definitely not a banana Registered User regular
    POKEMON MON MON

  • SarksusSarksus ATTACK AND DETHRONE GODRegistered User regular
    mrflippy wrote: »
    .
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Worst part of pregnancies (for a dude) is being the one who has to go out and buy what shes craving at all hours of the day/night

    luckily it was only Slurpees, Twix and Skittles.

    We live right next to a convenience store so it was mostly ok

    One time we did drive around the city looking for a dairy queen that served hamburgers because that was what she was craving. A hamburger specifically from dairy queen.

    Turns out there isn't one!

    My god, what if she craves something that doesn't exist. Like breakfast from Wendy's

    I'm missing the joke here.

    Wendy's doesn't serve breakfast. If you go to Wendy's at 9AM you can buy hamburgers and the regular stuff. Landshark's story about a very specific craving that could not be fulfilled since no such DQ existed in the area made me think of impossible cravings and the consequences.

  • BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    Fuck I love Our Lady Peace

    I am so old

  • Ravenhpltc24Ravenhpltc24 So Raven Registered User regular
    Quid wrote: »
    I have cleaned up so much lady vomit.

    It's brutally unfair that I make it to the toilet every time.

    I made it to the toilet last night! All in the toilet, every time!

    tumblr_mel5gnq1i11qi5bino1_500_thumb.gif

    (V) ( ;,,; ) (V)
  • SenjutsuSenjutsu thot enthusiast Registered User regular
    BeNarwhal wrote: »
    Fuck I love Our Lady Peace

    I am so old

    it wasn't even acceptable to love them when they were current

  • mrflippymrflippy Registered User regular
    Sarksus wrote: »
    mrflippy wrote: »
    .
    Sarksus wrote: »
    Worst part of pregnancies (for a dude) is being the one who has to go out and buy what shes craving at all hours of the day/night

    luckily it was only Slurpees, Twix and Skittles.

    We live right next to a convenience store so it was mostly ok

    One time we did drive around the city looking for a dairy queen that served hamburgers because that was what she was craving. A hamburger specifically from dairy queen.

    Turns out there isn't one!

    My god, what if she craves something that doesn't exist. Like breakfast from Wendy's

    I'm missing the joke here.

    Wendy's doesn't serve breakfast. If you go to Wendy's at 9AM you can buy hamburgers and the regular stuff. Landshark's story about a very specific craving that could not be fulfilled since no such DQ existed in the area made me think of impossible cravings and the consequences.

    I had breakfast from Wendy's a few weeks ago.

This discussion has been closed.