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Anti-D&D Movie

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Posts

  • ButtlordButtlord Fornicus Lord of Bondage and PainRegistered User regular
    gtrmp wrote: »
    why Unknown Armies is the best RPG: the opening text of the chapter on combat
    Somewhere out there is someone who had loving parents, watched clouds on a summer's day, fell in love, lost a friend, is kind to small animals, and knows how to say "please" and "thank you," and yet somehow the two of you are going to end up in a dirty little room with one knife between you and you are going to have to kill that human being.

    It's a terrible thing. Not just because he's come to the same realization and wants to survive just as much as you do, meaning he's going to try and puncture your internal organs to set off a cascading trauma effect that ends with you voiding your bowels, dying alone and removed from everything you've ever loved. No, it's a terrible thing because somewhere along the way you could have made a different choice. You could have avoided that knife, that room, and maybe even found some kind of common ground between the two of you. Or at least, you might have divvied up some turf and left each other alone. That would have been a lot smarter, wouldn't it? Even dogs are smart enough to do that. Now you're staring into the eyes of a fellow human and in a couple minutes one of you is going to be vomiting blood to the rhythm of a fading heartbeat. The survivor is going to remember this night for the rest of his or her life.

    SIX WAYS TO STOP A FIGHT

    So before you make a grab for that knife, you should maybe think about a few things. This moment is frozen in time. You can still make a better choice.

    Surrender. Is your pride really worth a human life? Drop your weapon, put up your hands, and tell them you're ready to cut a deal. You walk, and in exchange you give them something they need. Sidestep the current agenda. Offer them something unrelated to your dispute. and negotiate to find a solution.
    Disarm. Knife on the table? Throw it out the window. Opponent with a gun? Dodge until he's out of bullets. Deescalate the confrontation to fists, if possible. You can settle your differences with some brawling and still walk away. plus neither one of you has to face a murder charge or a criminal investigation.
    Rechannel. So you have a conflict. Settle it a smarter way. Arm wrestle, play cards, have a scavenger hunt, a drinking contest, anything that lets you establish a winner and a loser. Smart gamblers bet nothing they aren't willing to lose. Why put your life on the line?
    Pass the Buck. Is there somebody more powerful than either one of you who is going to be angry that you two are coming to blows? Pretend you're all in the mafia and you can't just kill each other without kicking your dispute upstairs first. Let that symbolic superior make a decision. You both gain clout for not spilling blood.
    Call the Cops. If you've got a grievance against somebody, let the police do your dirty work. File charges. Get a restraining order. Sue him in civil court for wrongful harm. You can beat him down without throwing a punch.
    Run Away. The hell with it. Who needs this kind of heat? Blow town, get a job someplace else, build a new power base. Is the world really too small for the both of you? It's a big planet out there.

    OH WELL

    Still determined? Backed into a corner with no way out? Have to fight for the greater good? Up against someone too stupid to know this is a bad idea? Or maybe just itching for some action? So be it. The rest of this chapter contains rules for simulating the murder of human beings. Have fun.

    i think i quoted some of this in the d&d chat thread a few days ago

    i love UA so much

    let's talk about it in the RPG thread!

  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    Antimatter wrote: »
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    And now you mooks tricked me into having a post in a D&D thread

    come play with us

    never

    Goatmon
  • AntimatterAntimatter Devo Was Right Gates of SteelRegistered User regular
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    Antimatter wrote: »
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    And now you mooks tricked me into having a post in a D&D thread

    come play with us

    never

    :C

  • DichotomyDichotomy Registered User regular
    oh look mister identifies self via obscure character from 90s superhero cartoon is too cool for us

    0BnD8l3.gif
  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    Dichotomy wrote: »
    Melding wrote: »
    the best system is the one i like. all other systems are garbage.

    Also i am getting tired of people complaining about 5th edition.

    Guess what, outside of saying it's more like a video game, you're making so of the same arguments every grognard before you has made.

    You are one of them now. It's you.

    Are there problems with 5e? sure, there's issues with every edition of DnD. There will never be a the best version of DnD. just the one you like the best.

    that's specious reasoning

    like I realize there's a cultural tendency at work here to assert that taking sides is foolish and an ambivalent, uncaring centrism is the One True Path, but it is not just a matter of shrugging and saying "oh well that's just your opinion", it is possible to critique and analyze systems such as those employed by games along metrics such as player agency, player equivalency, balance, simplicity, burden on the person running the game, and so on and so forth

    was "every grognard" critiquing preview materials of their given next edition in terms of evaluating whether or not players of different varieties had similar opportunity to participate in and influence the game? were they keeping an eye out for imbalances that favor certain players over others, or paying attention to the underlying structure and mechanics of the game to determine whether it was reasonably functional? were they taking the designers to task for vague, hopelessly broad, or contradictory statements of intent?

    'cuz if they were well great on them because that's a good thing to be doing

    Well, since this is the first public play test they've done of an edition, no. That would be impossible.

    However, the way most of the complaints are phrased around here, calling them criticism most of the time is being far too generous. There is legitimate conversation done on it, sure, I've been giving feed back on the play tests as well, but most the conversation when it comes up here in SE++ is "it's so fucking dumb, why don't they do this idea instead" which is venting, and that's fine, but the levels it gets to is annoying.

    going by what you've laid out in your post, that has almost never happened in SE at all. It's been simply the "Iconic" gif and a few yucks at second hand information.

    If it was actually reasoned arguments and dissecting of mechanics that would be one thing. But it by and large is not. It's usually "hey druid can turn into a dog now. not even a wolf, a dog. That's dumb."

    Buttlord wrote: »
    the problem with Next isn't even like a mechanical thing

    it's philosophical

    it's trying to please everyone and in the process won't please anyone

    it's trying to smash things together that really don't work together to meet this end

    it's gonna fail spectacularly (i hope (not because i hate 5e or w/e i just think it'll be funny to watch a trainwreck (i also think it failing would be funnier than it succeeding)))

    The idea of making a catch all edition is pretty dumb yeah, but most of the "Iconic" buzz talk they use is just buzz talk and it is annoying when people get caught up on it.

    There are a lot of systems that don't smooth together nice, but this isn't near a finished product. i bet if we saw any other edition this early we'd have just as much material to poke fun at. with as much "we're trying to make the most iconic version of [Class]"

    I would be amazed if it made it to print this rough. and really fucking amused, because yeah it would be a trainwreck, and it would just go on for miles

  • NeoTomaNeoToma Registered User regular
    Antimatter wrote: »
    i didnt want no trouble!
    It's impossible for me to hear this in anything than a Jackie Chan voice.
    Buttlord wrote: »
    also my absolute favorite magic system ever: entropomancy

    entropomancers are people who believe that at its core life is a series of coincidences, nothing more than random chance after random chance

    by looking the universe in the eye and saying "yo fuck your random bullshit" they get power taht lets them fuck with causality

    pick a fight you'll probably lose (and live)? get some power

    stare down the barrel of a loaded gun and dare the other guy to pull the trigger (and live)? get some more power

    hijack a bus, close your eyes, and floor it as you swerve into oncoming traffic (and live)? you can literally alter history. this is the Major Charge for entropomancers, they can alter one historical event

    but if they ever let someone else take a risk that they themselves aren't willing to? go back to zero jack

    please note the "and live" part of those examples, by the way

    there's a reason the nickname for entropomancers is "bodybags"

    Awwww yeah let me at that Gambler magic
    Roll the dice
    Be the Vriska Setzer

    Skylark
  • ShortyShorty touching the meat Intergalactic Cool CourtRegistered User regular
    poor, poor Setzer

    shitty ability, shitty equipment, and no magic stat to make up for it

    but he had a bitchin' coat and an Italian last name and so I will always love him

    NeoTomaDarth WaiterSkylark
  • IloveslimesIloveslimes Everett, WARegistered User regular
    Setzer was damn near broken actually. The trick is to give him the Lucky Dice and the Offering. At higher levels, he can do max damage (9999) at least 2 of the 4 attacks. I figured this out my first playthrough and he's always been one the most powerful characters.

    NeoTomaZellpher
  • NeoTomaNeoToma Registered User regular
    Setzer was damn near broken actually. The trick is to give him the Lucky Dice and the Offering. At higher levels, he can do max damage (9999) at least 2 of the 4 attacks. I figured this out my first playthrough and he's always been one the most powerful characters.
    thats
    really cool

  • ShortyShorty touching the meat Intergalactic Cool CourtRegistered User regular
    edited April 2013
    Setzer was damn near broken actually. The trick is to give him the Lucky Dice and the Offering. At higher levels, he can do max damage (9999) at least 2 of the 4 attacks. I figured this out my first playthrough and he's always been one the most powerful characters.

    or, level up edgar or celes or terra or locke half as much, give them an offering with the atma weapon, get guaranteed max damage on all four of the attacks

    (and then put a genji glove on them, put the illumina in their offhand, then go and kill Kefka in one round)

    or give terra, celes, strago, or relm the gem box and an economizer at literally any level

    either of these is a faster, easier, more reliable option

    Shorty on
  • IloveslimesIloveslimes Everett, WARegistered User regular
    By higher level, I'm thinking 40ish. The Lucky Dice ignores armor and doesn't require full hp to work. It's a very viable option.

  • ShortyShorty touching the meat Intergalactic Cool CourtRegistered User regular
    40ish is not high

    that's like, barely into the world of ruin

    Darth Waiter
  • ShivahnShivahn Unaware of her barrel shifter privilege Western coastal temptressRegistered User, Moderator mod
    Yeah but you can also just glitch Setzer out to murder pretty much everything.

    Setzer is broken, in the sense that the game has glitches and he is literally one of the things that has properties that are broken.

  • IloveslimesIloveslimes Everett, WARegistered User regular
    I get to the World of Ruin at really low levels so I can get the maximum leveling benefits of the various espers. At least, on all of my recent playthroughs I'd get there under or just close to 20.

  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    yeah, setzer is pretty easy to max out. i usually kept him on my team because of all the damage he can put down rather easily. plus i like gambling characters

  • SwissLionSwissLion We are beside ourselves! Registered User regular
    Was anyone else's first thought upon seeing this thread "@Antimatter's making a D&D movie?"

    ImWcN1I.png?3
    GatsbyEncLalaboxDarth WaiterEtchwartsSkylark
  • EncEnc A Fool with Compassion Pronouns: He, Him, HisRegistered User regular
    Melding wrote: »
    Dichotomy wrote: »
    Melding wrote: »
    the best system is the one i like. all other systems are garbage.

    Also i am getting tired of people complaining about 5th edition.

    Guess what, outside of saying it's more like a video game, you're making so of the same arguments every grognard before you has made.

    You are one of them now. It's you.

    Are there problems with 5e? sure, there's issues with every edition of DnD. There will never be a the best version of DnD. just the one you like the best.

    that's specious reasoning

    like I realize there's a cultural tendency at work here to assert that taking sides is foolish and an ambivalent, uncaring centrism is the One True Path, but it is not just a matter of shrugging and saying "oh well that's just your opinion", it is possible to critique and analyze systems such as those employed by games along metrics such as player agency, player equivalency, balance, simplicity, burden on the person running the game, and so on and so forth

    was "every grognard" critiquing preview materials of their given next edition in terms of evaluating whether or not players of different varieties had similar opportunity to participate in and influence the game? were they keeping an eye out for imbalances that favor certain players over others, or paying attention to the underlying structure and mechanics of the game to determine whether it was reasonably functional? were they taking the designers to task for vague, hopelessly broad, or contradictory statements of intent?

    'cuz if they were well great on them because that's a good thing to be doing

    Well, since this is the first public play test they've done of an edition, no. That would be impossible.

    However, the way most of the complaints are phrased around here, calling them criticism most of the time is being far too generous. There is legitimate conversation done on it, sure, I've been giving feed back on the play tests as well, but most the conversation when it comes up here in SE++ is "it's so fucking dumb, why don't they do this idea instead" which is venting, and that's fine, but the levels it gets to is annoying.

    going by what you've laid out in your post, that has almost never happened in SE at all. It's been simply the "Iconic" gif and a few yucks at second hand information.

    If it was actually reasoned arguments and dissecting of mechanics that would be one thing. But it by and large is not. It's usually "hey druid can turn into a dog now. not even a wolf, a dog. That's dumb."

    Buttlord wrote: »
    the problem with Next isn't even like a mechanical thing

    it's philosophical

    it's trying to please everyone and in the process won't please anyone

    it's trying to smash things together that really don't work together to meet this end

    it's gonna fail spectacularly (i hope (not because i hate 5e or w/e i just think it'll be funny to watch a trainwreck (i also think it failing would be funnier than it succeeding)))

    The idea of making a catch all edition is pretty dumb yeah, but most of the "Iconic" buzz talk they use is just buzz talk and it is annoying when people get caught up on it.

    There are a lot of systems that don't smooth together nice, but this isn't near a finished product. i bet if we saw any other edition this early we'd have just as much material to poke fun at. with as much "we're trying to make the most iconic version of [Class]"

    I would be amazed if it made it to print this rough. and really fucking amused, because yeah it would be a trainwreck, and it would just go on for miles

    I feel like this discussion, no matter how reasonably crafted, warrants:
    OGRE.jpg

    Melding
  • KingofMadCowsKingofMadCows Registered User regular
    This is but a fool's errand. One cannot make an anti-D&D movie for even when you attempt to demonize D&D, you spread the taint of its baleful influence and stoke the flames of its powers. For belief is the very source of D&D's domination. Whether it be glorious hymns sung in veneration or fearful hush tones whispering of its corruption, any thought concerning D&D, however idle or insignificant, opens one's mind to be invaded by its dark tendrils. Like a drop of quicksilver, it slips through the cracks between one's thoughts and slithers into the deepest recesses of the mindscape. There, veiled by the fog of limbo, it will plant itself where all of one's darkest memories and impulses are hidden away, fertile soil to nourish the seed of evil. And like a malignant tumor, it will spread, infecting every thought with exaltation of their new fiendish gods, with silver beards of razor wire and maleficent all-seeing spectacles, known only to mortals as GyGax and ArnEson.

  • EncEnc A Fool with Compassion Pronouns: He, Him, HisRegistered User regular
    This is but a fool's errand. One cannot make an anti-D&D movie for even when you attempt to demonize D&D, you spread the taint of its baleful influence and stoke the flames of its powers. For belief is the very source of D&D's domination. Whether it be glorious hymns sung in veneration or fearful hush tones whispering of its corruption, any thought concerning D&D, however idle or insignificant, opens one's mind to be invaded by its dark tendrils. Like a drop of quicksilver, it slips through the cracks between one's thoughts and slithers into the deepest recesses of the mindscape. There, veiled by the fog of limbo, it will plant itself where all of one's darkest memories and impulses are hidden away, fertile soil to nourish the seed of evil. And like a malignant tumor, it will spread, infecting every thought with exaltation of their new fiendish gods, with silver beards of razor wire and maleficent all-seeing spectacles, known only to mortals as GyGax and ArnEson.

    So D&D is essentially slenderman.

  • LarsLars Registered User regular
    Shorty wrote: »
    40ish is not high

    that's like, barely into the world of ruin

    What? 40ish is like when you should be beating the entire game unless you were excessively grinding.

    I'm usually early 20s when I get to the WoR, unless I'm really trying for a LLG to maximize Esper bonuses.

    And yeah, Setzer can be pretty powerful, if only because you can rig Slots to always give you Joker Death, even in fights where it was supposed to be disallowed (and it's even easier to rig in the Advance version). Fixed Dice do let him hit multiple 9999 attacks earlier than most other characters, and his armor equips are decent enough. Plus most of his weapons do full damage from the back row. Sure, he's no Mog/Terra/Gau, but he's at the very least solid mid-tier if you ignore his Slot rigging.

    Certainly miles better than Umaro and Cyan who are comparatively the worst characters in the game.

  • GoatmonGoatmon Companion of Kess Registered User regular
    vsove wrote: »
    My favourite part of that movie is that their best argument for 'pornography is evil' was 'IT MAY SUMMON A PORNGHOST INTO YOUR HOME TO KILL YOU ALL'.

    As far as I know the entire thing is metaphorical and, rather than trying to imply that it will literally release evil spirits, it's suggesting that the presence of pornography will somehow affect a household in a manner similar to the presence of said evil spirits.

    I have to wonder if, at times, it occurs to some of these people who were originally pushing to get this out there that, JUST MAYBE, there's a reason why it's so hard to create a believable link between porn and bad behavior.

    Switch Friend Code: SW-6680-6709-4204


  • GoatmonGoatmon Companion of Kess Registered User regular
    Dichotomy wrote: »
    oh look mister identifies self via obscure character from 90s superhero cartoon is too cool for us

    Any man who don't know the Grey Ghost ain't no man I wanna know.

    Switch Friend Code: SW-6680-6709-4204


  • GatsbyGatsby Registered User regular
    You literally had no clue who Snake Eyes was!

  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    There are plenty of other RPGs other than D&D

    why does nobody make a movie defaming them?

    In the case of, say, FATAL, it might even be accurate

  • ButtlordButtlord Fornicus Lord of Bondage and PainRegistered User regular
    Solar wrote: »
    There are plenty of other RPGs other than D&D

    why does nobody make a movie defaming them?

    In the case of, say, FATAL, it might even be accurate

    because D&D is the one that is well-known among people who aren't either a) neckbearded virgins or b) me

  • Mortal SkyMortal Sky queer punk hedge witchRegistered User regular
    The RPG that is what people thought DnD was in the 80s? Lamentation of the Flame Princess. Blood sacrifice and shit all over the place. Written by only the most disgruntled Scandinavian black metal fan neckbeards.

  • StraightziStraightzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User regular
    Buttlord wrote: »
    Solar wrote: »
    There are plenty of other RPGs other than D&D

    why does nobody make a movie defaming them?

    In the case of, say, FATAL, it might even be accurate

    because D&D is the one that is well-known among people who aren't either a) neckbearded virgins or b) me

    You shaved?!

    FAQSolarlaughingfuzzballEncDE?ADDarth WaitermasterofmetroidSkylarkKetar
  • ButtlordButtlord Fornicus Lord of Bondage and PainRegistered User regular
    Straightzi wrote: »
    Buttlord wrote: »
    Solar wrote: »
    There are plenty of other RPGs other than D&D

    why does nobody make a movie defaming them?

    In the case of, say, FATAL, it might even be accurate

    because D&D is the one that is well-known among people who aren't either a) neckbearded virgins or b) me

    You shaved?!

    best response possible

    EncDarth Waiter
  • LegbaLegba He did. Registered User regular
    Antimatter wrote: »
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    And now you mooks tricked me into having a post in a D&D thread

    come play with us

    Yo, do you get to keep both backgrounds, or do you have to chose one? Because I rolled a Yeti Giant and that's baller as all hell.

  • GatsbyGatsby Registered User regular
    Legba wrote: »
    Antimatter wrote: »
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    And now you mooks tricked me into having a post in a D&D thread

    come play with us

    Yo, do you get to keep both backgrounds, or do you have to chose one? Because I rolled a Yeti Giant and that's baller as all hell.

    @Legba that's the beauty of Gamma World

    You are a fusion of the two and it's up to you how much so

    Antimatter
  • AntimatterAntimatter Devo Was Right Gates of SteelRegistered User regular
    you can check the other boxes on the right for more origins and options, too

  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    gamma world is great but I will always reroll a character if one of the origins is insect because no

    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • GatsbyGatsby Registered User regular
    edited April 2013
    If I ever get an insect character in GW, I won't be able to stop myself from playing them like Inferno

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7FoPV0ILmw

    Gatsby on
  • GoatmonGoatmon Companion of Kess Registered User regular
    Gatsby wrote: »
    You literally had no clue who Snake Eyes was!

    Because GI Joe is stupiiiiiiiid

    Switch Friend Code: SW-6680-6709-4204


  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    If there is anything I have never claimed to be it is too cool for nerdy shit
    I just have never seen anything that generates any interest for D&D in me

  • AntimatterAntimatter Devo Was Right Gates of SteelRegistered User regular
    gamma world uses a modified and simplified version of d&d rules to let you play as a mutant in post apocalyptic earth that became apocalyptic after the large hadron collider activated in late fall 2012 and accidentally combined thousands of parallel earths together

  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    if there is any setting I am tired of it is post-apocalyptic mutant earth

  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    Goatmon wrote: »
    Gatsby wrote: »
    You literally had no clue who Snake Eyes was!

    Because GI Joe is stupiiiiiiiid

    :C

    GatsbyRainfall
  • GatsbyGatsby Registered User regular
    But this is good Mad Max/Road Warrior pulp-y sci-fi post apocalyptic earth

    Not boring grey and brown ruins and no wildlife with zero character or charm

  • AntimatterAntimatter Devo Was Right Gates of SteelRegistered User regular
    :\


    fun facts for the interested: the first version gamma world came out years and years before wasteland and fallout

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