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Those of us who are about to [Job Thread] salute you, bro!

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Posts

  • Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond Hubbard Mordor XenuRegistered User regular
    Javen wrote: »
    Ugh, my leaders want me to start essentially micromanaging my peers and I am not comfortable with this at all.

    Tell your team to use Excel to document their individual progress in Cookie Clicker.

    Then, send daily reports of that progress to your supervisors, except replace the incriminating words with buzzwords like 'synergy' and 'paradigm.'

    Your bosses will no doubt be impressed by your team when they SYNERGIZE 8,000 PARADIGMS per second.

    BAM, you'll be CFO by next week

    AthenorLednehkimeSimBenCaulk Bite 6Donovan PuppyfuckerKochikensGoatmonErin The RedPwnanObrienTox
  • Librarian's ghostLibrarian's ghost Librarian, Ghostbuster, and TimSpork Registered User regular
    A Gaggle of Laptops.

    In other news, the head of library sci at the university wants to talk. If nothing else maybe she can help me get some subbing jobs so I can start getting my name out in the schools. All the school districts in the state listen to her when it comes to libraries.

    (Switch Friend Code) SW-4910-9735-6014(PSN) timspork (Steam) timspork (XBox) Timspork


  • LednehLedneh shinesquawk Registered User regular
    On re-reading the company furlough policy, turns out if we get laid off due to the shutdown we get severance, which for me'd be a little over a month's pay

    There's that, I suppose, though it means I can't really job hunt until the start of November if we're still furloughed at that point


    Hey, resume question, is it "software programmer" or "software engineer"? The latter's my official title but I've heard conflict

  • ArtreusArtreus I'm a wizard And that looks fucked upRegistered User regular
    Oh christ

    one of the managers at a store in my area gave a bunch of police officers a ton of free food cards so we will have police officers coming in often and will thus feel safer this holiday season

    and then sent an email to the whole area and cc'd the regional vice president to brag about it

    I have opinions about it and how stupid it is

    Also, jesus christ people

    If you are a general manager or above

    Learn the difference between there/they're/their. You are an adult, at least pretend like you know basic grammar when you are sending official emails to everybody

    http://atlanticus.tumblr.com/ PSN: Atlanticus 3DS: 1590-4692-3954 Steam: Artreus
    Darth WaiterCaulk Bite 6SkeithDonovan Puppyfuckerpixiecow
  • JoeUserJoeUser Forum Santa Registered User regular
    godmode wrote: »

    Shoot, I don't know Virginia that well. So somewhere around Fairfax maybe?

  • HacksawHacksaw J. Duggan Esq. Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    My god, I am going to be working for 7 days straight, 16 hour days every day.

    I am going to make so much money.

    Darth WaiterDuke 2.0TofystedethUsagiSassoriSlacker71
  • HacksawHacksaw J. Duggan Esq. Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    I mean, it's not going to be fun, or pleasant, but god damn if I haven't needed a week like this in a while.

    Darth Waiter
  • Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond Hubbard Mordor XenuRegistered User regular
    Remember, Hacksaw ...

    Alcohol is The Devil's Juice and Disco Gets You Pregnant.

    HacksawFishmanCaulk Bite 6SkeithTofystedethUsagiAnialosSlacker71
  • godmodegodmode Southeast JapanRegistered User regular
    JoeUser wrote: »
    godmode wrote: »

    Shoot, I don't know Virginia that well. So somewhere around Fairfax maybe?

    Yeah, as a matter of fact I'm in southern Fairfax County: About 20 miles outside of Washington DC. The city itself is Springfield.

  • AthenorAthenor Battle Hardened Optimist The Skies of HiigaraRegistered User regular
    godmode wrote: »
    JoeUser wrote: »
    godmode wrote: »

    Shoot, I don't know Virginia that well. So somewhere around Fairfax maybe?

    Yeah, as a matter of fact I'm in southern Fairfax County: About 20 miles outside of Washington DC. The city itself is Springfield.

    Has anyone ever figured out why there are so many towns and cities named Springfield out there? Last I heard there were more than there were states.

    He/Him | "A boat is always safest in the harbor, but that’s not why we build boats." | "If you run, you gain one. If you move forward, you gain two." - Suletta Mercury, G-Witch
  • godmodegodmode Southeast JapanRegistered User regular
    edited October 2013
    No idea, but it's one of my favorite running gags in The Simpsons, always something obscuring what actual state it is. (I heard Ohio is the real one)

    godmode on
    Darth WaiterCaulk Bite 6
  • Caulk Bite 6Caulk Bite 6 One of the multitude of Dans infesting this place Registered User regular
    The construction worker grafitti in the portapotties have proven to be entertaining:
    In one, with arrows pointing at the sanitizer and TP nook:
    "FOR THE LOVE OF JEBUS, REFILL THESE"

    In another, concerning cock talk:
    "I call mine the throbing python of love"
    "WTF is throbing? Do you mean throbbing?"
    "He misspelt a word, BURN HIM."

    jnij103vqi2i.png
    Dead LegendDarth WaiterNocrenSatanic JesusErin The RedKaplar
  • JoeUserJoeUser Forum Santa Registered User regular
    godmode wrote: »
    JoeUser wrote: »
    godmode wrote: »

    Shoot, I don't know Virginia that well. So somewhere around Fairfax maybe?

    Yeah, as a matter of fact I'm in southern Fairfax County: About 20 miles outside of Washington DC. The city itself is Springfield.

    Hmm, what about this?

  • NocrenNocren Lt Futz, Back in Action North CarolinaRegistered User regular
    The construction worker grafitti in the portapotties have proven to be entertaining:
    In one, with arrows pointing at the sanitizer and TP nook:
    "FOR THE LOVE OF JEBUS, REFILL THESE"

    In another, concerning cock talk:
    "I call mine the throbing python of love"
    "WTF is throbing? Do you mean throbbing?"
    "He misspelt a word, BURN HIM."

    I love constructive criticism graffiti.

    Had some great ones on my ships in the Navy as well.

    And some not so great...
    Someone actually wiped their ass and then wrote "FTN" (for Fuck the Navy) with the used paper on the stall wall afterwards.

    At least, I hope it was with paper... D:

    newSig.jpg
  • AthenorAthenor Battle Hardened Optimist The Skies of HiigaraRegistered User regular
    Nocren wrote: »
    The construction worker grafitti in the portapotties have proven to be entertaining:
    In one, with arrows pointing at the sanitizer and TP nook:
    "FOR THE LOVE OF JEBUS, REFILL THESE"

    In another, concerning cock talk:
    "I call mine the throbing python of love"
    "WTF is throbing? Do you mean throbbing?"
    "He misspelt a word, BURN HIM."

    I love constructive criticism graffiti.

    Had some great ones on my ships in the Navy as well.

    And some not so great...
    Someone actually wiped their ass and then wrote "FTN" (for Fuck the Navy) with the used paper on the stall wall afterwards.

    At least, I hope it was with paper... D:

    ... you are on a ship... how the hell do you get away with that? I mean, it's not like there are that many places to go, and I'm sure there are security cameras here and there...

    He/Him | "A boat is always safest in the harbor, but that’s not why we build boats." | "If you run, you gain one. If you move forward, you gain two." - Suletta Mercury, G-Witch
  • NocrenNocren Lt Futz, Back in Action North CarolinaRegistered User regular
    pffft.... cameras... good one.

    This was on the Sub Tender which, for all intents and purposes for the first couple of years, was essentially part of the pier.

    As for the carrier, with a full compliment of ~5000 people, and various compartments, you can get away with a lot.

    newSig.jpg
    Usagi
  • Duke 2.0Duke 2.0 Time Trash Cat Registered User regular
    Just got my schedule for next week. Pretty much everybody is working three days and our clock in/out hours got reduced for all locations.

    VRXwDW7.png
  • mullymully Registered User regular
    job thread:

    i am starting a business. i am writing resumes for folks. if you are interested, PM me. i am charging $100CAD. 50% at start, 50% on completion, and only if you are satisfied.

    i'm going to start getting a site together and all that. just thought i'd mention.

    ElbasunuDonovan Puppyfucker
  • NocrenNocren Lt Futz, Back in Action North CarolinaRegistered User regular
    Dammit.... Not sure I can afford $100CAD

    newSig.jpg
  • Caulk Bite 6Caulk Bite 6 One of the multitude of Dans infesting this place Registered User regular
    It we were still in the nineties, I could make the joke that it's about twenty bucks USD.

    jnij103vqi2i.png
    mully
  • Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond Hubbard Mordor XenuRegistered User regular
    mully wrote: »
    $100CAD

    Look, lady, I don't speak Roman Numeral, okay?

    Talk dollars and make cents.

    GoldenSeducer
  • Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond Hubbard Mordor XenuRegistered User regular
    p.s.

    Punch it up with some buzzwords like 'turgid' and 'splendiferous' then we'll call it a day.

  • mullymully Registered User regular
    you could always just claim to be unsatisfied at the end :)

    Darth Waiter
  • mullymully Registered User regular
    at this point i should probably give a 50% discount for a linkedin recommend and a "resume writing" endorsement

  • Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond Hubbard Mordor XenuRegistered User regular
    mully wrote: »
    you could always just claim to be unsatisfied at the end :)

    brb, stitching bite in tongue

    mully
  • minirhyderminirhyder BerlinRegistered User regular
    I am unsatisfied this resume didn't get me a job next day what kind of scam is this

    mully
  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2013
    Ledneh wrote: »

    Hey, resume question, is it "software programmer" or "software engineer"? The latter's my official title but I've heard conflict

    Do you have an accredited engineering degree/ are you a member of the society for engineers (or whatever the US equivalent is. If they even have one.)

    If no to both, you're not an engineer. But that said, call yourself what you like, nobody is going to make much differentiation.

    tynic on
    UsagiSlacker71
  • LednehLedneh shinesquawk Registered User regular
    tynic wrote: »
    Ledneh wrote: »

    Hey, resume question, is it "software programmer" or "software engineer"? The latter's my official title but I've heard conflict

    Do you have an accredited engineering degree/ are you a member of the society for engineers (or whatever the US equivalent is. If they even have one.)

    If no to both, you're not an engineer. But that said, call yourself what you like, nobody is going to make much differentiation.

    Righto then, programmer it is

    software engineer seemed a bit odd but it's been my job title for five years, so I thought I'd check

    Thanks :)

  • Caulk Bite 6Caulk Bite 6 One of the multitude of Dans infesting this place Registered User regular
    I'm sure it couldn't hurt to specify "Job Title: Software Engineer" in that section.

    jnij103vqi2i.png
  • AthenorAthenor Battle Hardened Optimist The Skies of HiigaraRegistered User regular
    edited October 2013
    I wonder if I should talk to the alumni association for my university about job placement. I've been out of school for 4 years, so it might be a bit awkward.

    Athenor on
    He/Him | "A boat is always safest in the harbor, but that’s not why we build boats." | "If you run, you gain one. If you move forward, you gain two." - Suletta Mercury, G-Witch
  • Gilbert0Gilbert0 North of SeattleRegistered User regular
    Ledneh wrote: »
    tynic wrote: »
    Ledneh wrote: »

    Hey, resume question, is it "software programmer" or "software engineer"? The latter's my official title but I've heard conflict

    Do you have an accredited engineering degree/ are you a member of the society for engineers (or whatever the US equivalent is. If they even have one.)

    If no to both, you're not an engineer. But that said, call yourself what you like, nobody is going to make much differentiation.

    Righto then, programmer it is

    software engineer seemed a bit odd but it's been my job title for five years, so I thought I'd check

    Thanks :)

    I've always put what my official title is. So if/when they call for reference, they ask about your position always matches what they ask.

    Technically, my title is "Specialist" it just means I'm a non-union person getting paid the same as a union person.

    But if you do change it, I'd suggest "Software Developer" as opposed to "Software Programmer". Sounds better to me. But "Software Engineer" is better than both of those.

  • rhylithrhylith Death Rabbits HoustonRegistered User regular
    Usually they use specialist to denote non-engineers because there are certain legal connotations to the word engineer in many states.

    So, for example, if I call myself a process engineer I could get in deep shit unless I break down and get my Professional Engineer's license.

    Rhylith - <Shambler Milk> Horde Chogall
    Usagitynic
  • UsagiUsagi Nah Registered User regular
    rhylith wrote: »
    Usually they use specialist to denote non-engineers because there are certain legal connotations to the word engineer in many states.

    So, for example, if I call myself a process engineer I could get in deep shit unless I break down and get my Professional Engineer's license.

    Yeeeep I have to be really careful when people abbreviate my position to PE

    It's Project Engineer, not Professional, I do not have a stamp (yet)

  • rhylithrhylith Death Rabbits HoustonRegistered User regular
    Usagi wrote: »
    rhylith wrote: »
    Usually they use specialist to denote non-engineers because there are certain legal connotations to the word engineer in many states.

    So, for example, if I call myself a process engineer I could get in deep shit unless I break down and get my Professional Engineer's license.

    Yeeeep I have to be really careful when people abbreviate my position to PE

    It's Project Engineer, not Professional, I do not have a stamp (yet)

    I wish all I had to do to get it would be to pass the damn test. This whole "gather other PE references and write up a detailed work history" thing is just too much and really takes away my motivation to finish it off.

    I know I'll pass the test just fine when I break down and do the rest of it but uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugh.

    Rhylith - <Shambler Milk> Horde Chogall
    Usagi
  • CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    4 hours on a roll change suuuuuuucks

    And what makes it worse is when it overlaps the boss' shift change so they have to stand around and jack their jaws for 20 minutes while I'm hot and dirty and hungry and just want to get this shit done

    XBoxLive Gamertag: ZombieKyle Secret Satan Wishlist
  • mullymully Registered User regular
    every time you say PE i just see premature ejaculation

    UsagiDarth WaiterRubberACKwoaru
  • Caulk Bite 6Caulk Bite 6 One of the multitude of Dans infesting this place Registered User regular
    phys ed, here

    jnij103vqi2i.png
    NocrenFishmanSkeithBlake TN1tSt4lkerKaplar
  • ASimPersonASimPerson Cold... and hard.Registered User regular
    My job title is software engineer and as far as I can tell that is par for the course here in Silicon Valley - as long as I applied only other tech companies I don't there would be any confusion.

    Also I don't think you can be a certified "Software Engineer" the way you can be a Professional Engineer anyway.

  • EndEnd Registered User regular
    edited October 2013
    yeah in the US there's no such thing as a software engineer in the same way that you have other engineers

    edit: oh, apparently texas and florida regulate it, but I'm not clear on the specifics

    End on
    I wish that someway, somehow, that I could save every one of us
    zaleiria-by-lexxy-sig.jpgsteam~tinythumb.png
This discussion has been closed.