An SE++ [Phalla]mas
There was a time, spoken of only in whispers, when the forums were different. Of course, it is blasphemy to speak of this, but I think that it’s important you know. There were heroes that walked among us then, men and women who posted with divine righteousness. They say that there are some among us still, although we see them not.
In those days, the forums rang with the blows of theorycrafters and fanartists alike. You could take no more than two steps before a “bro?” came your way. It is said that nobody had even heard of an anime thread. I will tell you a tale of that golden age. It is a good story, I think. It is a story of love, of betrayal, of mods and men clashing in a desperate struggle.
I will tell you of SE++ Christmas 2013.
What is this?
This is a phalla. A phalla is the PA forum version of the game mafia. Critical Failures has a good summary of the basic mechanics for a phalla game
here if you are unfamiliar with the game. The premise is an uninformed majority (the village) must seek out and eliminate an informed minority (the mafia) hiding amongst them. I,
@Baidol, will be your host this game with
@SirFabulous as my co-host and writer. This particular phalla is of the traditional variety: village vs. mafia. Roles are traditional (vig, seer, guard, but no thralls, etc.) This game has a player cap of 70. Signups for this game will continue until at 8:00 pm PST Monday, November 4, or until all positions are filled.
The game will begin sometime on Monday, November 4 and will end on Tuesday, November 5, resulting in a long Day 1. Roles will go out shortly before 10:00 pm PST with the game's opening narration going up at 10:00pm PST. This will result in a normal length Day 1.
“It-It’s finally done.” Tube looked at his greatest creation with pride. His cold, black heart swelled with joy, and some say that it grew three sizes that day. Uncaring of the relative size of his heart, Tube allowed himself a sob of relief. It had taken years of hard labour, but it looked like everything was worth it. “Finally, the forums will be filled with holiday cheer. With your help, I can rule the forums, alone, with an iron fist. No longer will those independent thinking fools stand in my way. The dawn of the Tube age is here!”
As he spoke these final words, Tube strode up to his dazzling, chrome creation and, holding a piece of mistletoe above them both, firmly planted a sloppy kiss upon the shiny, hardened chassis. There was no need to fear, nothing would disturb them in the sanctity of Tube’s home. They could get away with anything.
The door slammed open and light streamed into the darkened laboratory. “No! No, there was time now!” Howled Tube as he whirled to face his intruders. “You silly geese! I am so, so close! If you had waited for just a few days more!”
“I’m afraid we can’t let that happen Tube,” spoke Larlar. “We’ve had it. With you. With Geth. With whatever it is you’re working on now. We will not allow these forums to be turned into a despotic perversions of holiday cheer.” Tube turned and observed his creations for the last time. So many dreams unfulfilled. So many animes left unwatched. So many forumers wallowing in ignorance. It was time to go out with a bang.
As the bullets tore through his body, Tube started to smile. When his knees finally collapsed, and his vision went hazy, he started to laugh. With a final, piteous breath, Tube spoke. “I knew this day was coming. Upon my death, the failsafe procedures will be activated. You have not won. My glorious edict will remain… in… perpetuity.”
As the light finally left his eyes, a low whine filled the air. Electricity crackled across the walls, and the whine slowly rose in pitch. “Let’s get out of here, guys!” Rorus Raz swore, wetting himself slightly.
And so it began.
The DeadTube - Administrator:
Insurrection
What’s this phalla’s gimmick?
I will tell you when you are dead. We will see how this goes.
You blink your eyes against the harsh forum sun. It’s been tough work these past few weeks. You used to think that the death of Tube would be the greatest blessing this forum could ever know, but it has turned out to be a horrible curse. With Tube gone, your robotic overlords have free reign over the land.
It’s almost enough to make you want to rebel. You had better not though. Rumor states that if the general population becomes too unruly, the forums will be shut down forever. If that happened, how would you ever obsessively check how many “awesomes” you had? Without awesomes, does life have a purpose?
And so you go on, living your life day by day, trying to do nothing to displease your masters. It would all be so much easier without the moderators. Although many were wiped out, you hear that some still remain. You have no idea what their goal is, but you will literally kill a man before you let these forums fade into history.
Fortunately, the holiday season is fast approaching and your robot overlords at least make the place look nice while they whip you into submission. Even now, the Ministry of Cheer that looms over all of the forums is being bedecked in lights and -
Suddenly, a claxon sounds from the Ministry and a voice is heard over the intercom, “This is Robot Santa Prime. Intelligence has revealed that the remnants of the
Moderator insurrection have regrouped in SE++. Until further notice, SE++ is on lockdown. All posters are ordered to register at the Ministry of Cheer and begin eliminating the insurrectionists.”
“Holiday Fear forces have been deployed to SE++ to aid you. Collateral damage is expected. Do not fail us.”
The Rules
Please remember that, by signing up for this game, you are agreeing to abide by the rules of the game.!Sign up in boldlimegreen. If you are unsure about your ability to commit to the game or signups are full, you may sign up as a reserve by posting
!Reserve.
Upon signing up, in accordance with lockdown protocols, you must also
register on the Ministry of Cheer proboards with your PA forum name. Your Minicheer account authorization will be placed on hold until the game begins.
As a member of the forum community, you must decide which MiniCheer room those suspected of lacking Christmas cheer will sweat in by voting in
!boldcyan before the opening narration. Your options are Room 101, Room 202 or Room 303. The cyan vote has no effect on the mechanics of the game, only which RNG list is used to assign roles.
Clarifications may be asked in this thread in
!bolddarkorange and will be collected in the second post of this thread.
All players must post twice a day, including a vote post for a player to be lynched, designated in
!boldred. Retraction posts can be made in
!boldlimegreen, but are not required. The last
!boldred vote post from a given user will be the one that is counted.
Do. Not. Edit. Vote. Posts. Period. For. Any. Reason. Fullstop. Dot. Votes in an edited post will not be counted. To aid me in counting votes, please place your votes on a separate line at the beginning or end of your post, and not buried in the middle of a paragraph.
Standard phalla rules apply. This includes, but is not limited to, no copying/pasting, taking screenshots, taking pictures of and e-mailing or anything else of role PM’s.
Communication of any kind between live players and dead players is forbidden. Additionally, dead players may not communicate with other dead players. A single death post containing no in-game information is allowed. Additionally, after death, players may not like/awesome/bro posts made in the game.
I must have administrator access to any proboards created. Please also add me and
@SirFabulous to any PM conversations you have with other players. As a reminder, trust and truth are valuable commodities in phalla. As such, if you wish to bring a new person into a conversation you are already participating in, you MUST begin a new conversation. You cannot simply add them to the old one. Finally, should you be in a group conversation with a person who is killed, the remaining live members of the group must start a new conversation.
You will receive one (1) warning for inactivity before being removed and replaced. So long as replacements are available, players will be replaced, until the point of no return. If you were around for my last phalla, you know I will purge inactive mafia just as easily as inactive villagers.
If/once the player count drops below 15 players, all surviving players must vote every day. THERE WILL BE NO WARNINGS AND INACTIVES WILL BE REMOVED IMMEDIATELY AT THAT POINT AND WILL NOT BE REPLACED. Much of the late game involves analysis of voting records and that can’t happen if people don’t vote.
Voting for this phalla will close at 10:00pm PST (6:00am GMT). Only posts with a timestamp of before 10:00pm PST (6:00am GMT) i.e. 9:XX or sooner will be accepted. Special actions must be PM’ed to myself or listed on proboards by the same time. Orders put into an edited post on a proboard will not be accepted.
Order of Operations
1. Vote(s)
2. Non-offensive actions
3. Offensive actions
Posts
2. Flarne
3. Platypus Beirut
4. facetious
5. Kilroy
6. miscellaneousinsanity
7. Langly
8. Nirya
9. I needed a name to post.
10. Huntera
11. Slacker71
12. fightinfilipino
13. Matev
14. Chicoblue
15. Mortal Sky
16. That Dave Fella Taya
17. Zonugal
18. godmode
19. Bucketman
20. NeoToma
21. Duke 2.0 kime
22. Calamity Jane
23. Virgil_Leads_You
24. ASimPerson
25. Screech of the Farg
26. VoproSTEIN
27. The Cow King
28. Rainfall
29. premium
30. Centipede Damascus
31. Gizzy
32. MetroidZoid
33. Retaba
34. HellaJeff
35. Peccavi
36. Gumpy
37. Goose!
38. Kelzor
39. T4CT
40. Stilts
41. Cantide
42. Tossrock
43. Caulk Bite 6
44. I Win Swordfights Marikir
45. SLyM
46. neville Romanian my Escutcheron
47. Obifett
48. Assuran
49. The Otaku Suppository vertroue
50. Dogbone33
51. Infidel
52. MrTLicious
53. M.D.
54. TheRoadVirus
55. Buddha73
56. Phyphor
57. Alegis
58. Heffling
59. Mill
60. Fishman
61. blahmcblah
62. MikeyCTS
63. Preda
64. Grunt's Ghost
65. Invictus
66. undergroundmonorail
67. Zombie Hero jdarksun
68. Greenbarons
Reserves
1. jdarksun
2. Marikir
3. Rawwking Goodguy
4. Romanian My Escutcheon
5. kime
6. vertroue
7. Taya
8. SaberOverEasy
Current Player List
9. I needed a name to post.
24. Virgil_Leads_You
28. The Cow King
29. Rainfall
36. Peccavi
55. TheRoadVirus
57. Phyphor
69. Greenbarons
Narrations
Day 1 - Holiday Fear (Opening Narration)
Night 1- Do You Believe in Mods?
Retaba - Forum member: The mob
Mill - Moderator: Milled to a fine paste
SLyM - Forum Member: SLyM chance of survival
Alegis - Forum Member: Surprisingly not alcohol
Gumpy - Forum Member: His game was a little rusty
Goose! - Forum Member: What a silly goose
Night 2 - Christmas Come Deadly
Calamity Jane - Moderator: The mob
Nirya - Moderator: Nirya to Heaven
blahmcblah - Forum Member: Had the blahmcblood drained from him
Langly - Forum Member: Not-so-immortal
godmode - Forum Member: Godmode deactivated
T4CT - Forum Member: Moderator T4CTics
Buddha73 - Dog Beta: Shhh
Dogbone33 - Moderator: Spirited away
Night 3 - Slay-Bells on the Roof
Cantide - Forum Member: The mob
Marikir - Forum Member: Marikiry Christmas
Slacker71 - Forum Member: Caught Slacking
premium - Forum Member: Now he’s a premium cut of meat
jdarksun - Forum Member: The Dark of our life has gone out
Grunt’s Ghost - Forum Member: Fulfilled the Prophecy
Obifett - Geth: More like OBanfett
HellaJeff - Dog Alpha: Shhh
Centipede Damascus - Forum Member: Shhh
Night 4 - Santa’s On His Way
Mortal Sky - Forum Member: The mob
Stilts - Forum Member: Stocking Stuffer’d
Matev - Forum Member: CheckMatev
chicoblue - Forum Member: Moderators Blue him away
Fishman - Forum Member: The one that didn’t get away
VoproSTEIN - Forum Member: OhnoDYIN’
zongual - Robot Santa Beta: Deactivated
Invictus - Forum Member: Shhh
SCREECH OF THE FARG - Forum Member: Ghostbusted
Night 5 - No Escape Claus
MrTLicious - Forum Member: The mob
Infidel - Forum Member: Phallamas Cheer
fightinfillipino - Moderator: Run over by the Pain-Deer
kime - Forum Member: For whom the bell tolls
flarne - Forum Member: Gosh Flarne it all
Heffling - Forum Member: Died without an avatar to his name
vertroue - Forum Member: Paragon of Vertroue
Gizzy - Moderator: Ghostbusted
Night 6 - Silent Night
KetBra - Forum Member: The mob
Romanian My Escutcheon - Forum Member: Phallamas Cheer
Kilroy - Forum Member: One last act of Christmas Spirit
NeoToma - Forum Member: His life will be recorded in the Neo-Tome
Assuran - Forum Member: Empty Assurances
undergroundmonorail - Forum Member: He’s taking the underground monorail in the sky
M.D. - Robot Santa Prime: From Beyond the Grave
Mikey CTS - Moderator: Ghostbusted
Night 7 - All Good Things
Preda - Forum Member: The mob
Platypus Beirut - Moderator: Phallamas Cheer
Caulk Bite 6 - Forum Member: Brutalized
Huntera - Forum Member: The Huntera Becomes the Hunted
MetroidZoid - Forum Member: Bounty Collected
miscellaneousinsanity - Forum Member: It’s Crazy that He’s Gone
Night 8 - Of Mods and Men
Bucketman - Forum Member: The mob
Taya - Forum Member: Shhh/Double Tapped
ASimPerson - Forum Member: ADeadPerson
Kelzor - scsscs: Caught off GUARD
Tossrock - Forum Member: A Christmas Wraith at the Door
Moderator (Mafia) Victory
Clarifications
I make my triumphant Phalla return!
Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
!sign up
Steam | Twitter
I'll have to think about this.
!sign up
Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
3DS: 2981-5304-3227
pu ngis!
time to fail to get the last mafia killed again
oh boy oh boy
steam | Dokkan: 868846562
XBox LIVE: Bogestrom | Destiny
PSN: Bogestrom
Oh yes please
I think I've played too much Phalla.
Because I cannot for the life of me remember what this is about.
Steam | Twitter
Your avatar.
Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
Room 202
Oooh.
That makes more sense.
You are correct. Voting for a room should begin immediately.
let's do this
Room 202 2 is better than 1 or 3 this is factual
Room 101
OF DEATH
Steam | Twitter