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Lost Salientblink twiceif you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered Userregular
edited November 2013
Hypothetical chocolate chip for me
I am not a huge fan of peanut butter although I'm always willing to try a new cookie.
Lost Salient on
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
0
#pipeCocky Stride, Musky odoursPope of Chili TownRegistered Userregular
I'm going pretty high concept this year. Hopefully the shorter shipping time will make it possible. Gonna pick up some supplies today, cook and let sit at room temperature for a few days as a test.
If you were receiving hypothetical cookies, would you prefer hypothetical chocolate chip or hypothetical peanut butter cookies with a peanut butter cup? Hypothetical chocolate chocolate chip is also an option.
I'm actually relieved that the package arrived intact - I was worried the contents were going to get crushed under some guys black Friday TV or something. Glad it's all in one piece!
So, recipes below:
Swiss Mountaintop Shortbread Cookies:
2 cups butter
1 cup sugar
3 1/4 cups regular flour
1/2 cup rice flour
One big Toblerone (or regional equivalent) bar (around 350g-400g)
Smidge of icing sugar
Preheat oven to 325.
Get a big bowl. Beat butter until fluffy, add in sugar until fully mixed (a few minutes at least).
In a separate bowl, sift together flours, then combine with butter/sugar mix. (If you have a mixer, just let it go while you do the next step).
Take your Toblerone bar and break it into chunks. Save the biggest 50 pieces (no bigger than 1/3 of one 'triangle' of Toblerone). Mince the rest of the chocolate and add it into the mix.
Prepare two (maybe three?) parchment paper cookie sheets; mush together dough into cookies, stick a chocolate chunk into the top.
Bake for 20-25 minutes, watch for the cookies browning.
Once out, use a sifter to sprinkle on icing sugar while they are still hot - it will melt a bit and stick.
Done!
Chocolate Caramel Crunch Bark (CCCB)
In soviet Russia, bark eats you!
1 cup butter
1 brown sugar
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 package of chocolate chips (I prefer semi-sweet, some prefer milk)
1 pack of saltines (unsalted, ironically)
First, preheat the oven to 350 and prepare the base - line a banking sheet with foil (bottom AND sides), then cover it entirely with saltines. Usually one pack does it, sometimes you need a few extra. Don't be afraid to break them to fit gaps in the sides.
Next, you need to make caramel. Stick a pot on the stove, on 3-4 heat. Add butter, brown sugar, and baking soda, and mix constantly. You'll need to keep a close eye on this, and wait for it to turn brown and start to thicken. Look for a guide on google if you haven't made caramel before. It's dead simple, you just need to know when to stop... It's a bit of a tricky point - if it's not thick/dark enough, the caramel will boil when baking in the next step and make a mess of the oven. If it is too dark/brown, it will be hard to spread and may begin to burn.
Once the caramel is ready, immediately pour it over the saltines. Use a spatula to spread it over the whole pan evenly - be careful, the stuff is hot and sticky like napalm.
Throw the pan into the oven for 10 minutes. Keep an eye on it; it should bubble a bit, but if it starts foaming over take it out - the caramel wasn't cooked enough. Just rotate it in and out until it looks like it has thickened.
With the caramel ready, empty the bag of chocolate chips over the whole mess and spread them around with a spatula until even. If they don't melt, put them into the oven (which should be off now!) for a few seconds to speed the melting.
Let the pan cool for a few minutes, then stick it in the freezer until it's cold. Break it apart and eat!
AN EMBARRASSMENT OF RICHES!
I haven't sampled all of them, yet, but I'll take a guess at what they are. Clockwise: 7 layer bars (maybe), Peppermint angel wing sugar cookies (totes adorbs), Some kind of cheese cake type bar thing (whatever it is it's delicious and rich and I am going to eat way too many of those tonight), Pumpkin bar, Pecan crescent cookies, Big huge chocolate chunk cookie thing.
I will not spoil my dinner I will not spoil my dinner I WILL NOT.
Thank you so much, @Lost Salient, these are DELICIOUS.
I'm gonna do all my baking on Sunday and get my box out with Monday's mail.
+10
Lost Salientblink twiceif you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered Userregular
Yay!' I totally biffed the accompanying note. It's here on my desk. So the cookies are seven layer bars, peppermint mustaches (they were going to be candy canes and I'd forgotten that I'd used up all my red food dye on a strawberry cake and yellow or blue or green candy cane cookies just sound awful), cheesecake dreams (a family tradition), gingerbread bars (I don't care for pumpkin), almond crescents, and Zingerman's dark chocolate masterpieces with added black pepper.
I hope you enjoy them!
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, ModeratorMod Emeritus
I do my baking this weekend. I was going to try something different, but it's harder than I thought it would be so I'm going safe instead.
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
Lost Salientblink twiceif you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered Userregular
Technically they are the recipe for Zingerman's Funky Chunky Dark Chocolate cookies. But they are SO GOOD that they deserve a more noble name. And the only thing I do that's remotely different from the recipe available online is that I shave block chocolate so you get lots of tiny chocolate flakes and big chocolate hunks, annnd... then I add a teensy bit of black pepper because this is my new jam.
I'm glad you enjoy them and I'm sorry I couldn't fit more in the box! I just really didn't want them to break.
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
PACKAGE INSPECTED AND APPROVED FOR SHIPPING BY POSTALCOW
Prepare for cookies, someone.
*Internally Screaming*
+5
ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, ModeratorMod Emeritus
Ooh, bee free. I hope that's mine, I am terrified of bees.
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
0
ApogeeLancks In Every Game EverRegistered Userregular
I'm gonna complete my baking this weekend! I was going to do something more creative, but I've never shipped cookies before. I want to make sure things make it to the other end in one piece.
I've sent a whole lot of stuff and the only thing I've ever had trouble with was lemon bars. They did ok at room temperature in my place but ended up too fragile to survive the mail.
Dude, I really don't care if things make it in one piece as long as they are delicious. What I am saying is, I will eat the crumbs/pieces off of my shirt, if need be.
Oh good because my specialty is a plain white t-shirt wrapped in pillsbury cookie dough and rolled up jellyroll style.
0
ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, ModeratorMod Emeritus
Ew
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
0
Lost Salientblink twiceif you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered Userregular
Oh boy I boy
I always wanted the ol' Jellyroll of the Loom
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
+1
ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, ModeratorMod Emeritus
mercifully finished baking
I hope my person likes chocolate
and candy
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
My cookie recipients package is delayed by "adverse weather conditions"
"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds" does not apply to UPS it seems.
I am sorry, cookie person.
*Internally Screaming*
0
ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, ModeratorMod Emeritus
Cookies sent today!
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
+1
Lost Salientblink twiceif you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered Userregular
I got home from work with five minutes to spare between walking in and going back out to tutor, and this was on my doorstep!
Obviously I wasn't going to WAIT TIL I GOT BACK so I ran to get my scissors and busted it open and inside was a note! A note all about your spelling, which was totally fine, and the cookies, which are WAY MORE THAN FINE, and also about how you gave me the recipes just in case! Oh man oh boy!
Incredibly tidy packing job. Did you save those air packets for months, or..?
GOTTA OPEN EVERYTHING FAST
KERPOW! Alton Brown's puffy chocolate chip cookies, chocolate no-bakes, and shortbread cookies in chocolate, lemon, and mocha varieties!
Artfully arranged on a plate. Hey who ate some of that chocolate chip cookie?
Oh, right. I did.
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
+14
ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, ModeratorMod Emeritus
That box looks exactly like the box I sent, so at first I thought you were my person, but alas. I know they won't get it till Friday, but still.
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
0
ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, ModeratorMod Emeritus
Mostly I am nervous that my cookies are awful. :P
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
0
Lost Salientblink twiceif you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered Userregular
The funny thing is the "weather conditions" were, like... a handful of snowflakes in the morning and ice on the trees for an hour or two.
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
I'm glad it showed up and everything appears undamaged! The packaging was from recently arrived things, and just seemed perfect. It was actually stuck in maryland over the weekend
The "puffy" cookies didn't turn out fluffy like they usually do, I think I missed something ingredientwise, just can't remember off the top of my head. Initial testing proved they were still tasty tho.
You always need more cookie recipes, in case of cookie emergency.
Posts
I am not a huge fan of peanut butter although I'm always willing to try a new cookie.
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
Hypothethically all options sound good
omg @Apogee they are soooooo good I need these recipes!
Thank you thank you thank you!
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
Kinky. Glad you liked em @Psykoma
I'm actually relieved that the package arrived intact - I was worried the contents were going to get crushed under some guys black Friday TV or something. Glad it's all in one piece!
So, recipes below:
Swiss Mountaintop Shortbread Cookies:
1 cup sugar
3 1/4 cups regular flour
1/2 cup rice flour
One big Toblerone (or regional equivalent) bar (around 350g-400g)
Smidge of icing sugar
Preheat oven to 325.
Get a big bowl. Beat butter until fluffy, add in sugar until fully mixed (a few minutes at least).
In a separate bowl, sift together flours, then combine with butter/sugar mix. (If you have a mixer, just let it go while you do the next step).
Take your Toblerone bar and break it into chunks. Save the biggest 50 pieces (no bigger than 1/3 of one 'triangle' of Toblerone). Mince the rest of the chocolate and add it into the mix.
Prepare two (maybe three?) parchment paper cookie sheets; mush together dough into cookies, stick a chocolate chunk into the top.
Bake for 20-25 minutes, watch for the cookies browning.
Once out, use a sifter to sprinkle on icing sugar while they are still hot - it will melt a bit and stick.
Done!
Chocolate Caramel Crunch Bark (CCCB)
1 cup butter
1 brown sugar
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 package of chocolate chips (I prefer semi-sweet, some prefer milk)
1 pack of saltines (unsalted, ironically)
First, preheat the oven to 350 and prepare the base - line a banking sheet with foil (bottom AND sides), then cover it entirely with saltines. Usually one pack does it, sometimes you need a few extra. Don't be afraid to break them to fit gaps in the sides.
Next, you need to make caramel. Stick a pot on the stove, on 3-4 heat. Add butter, brown sugar, and baking soda, and mix constantly. You'll need to keep a close eye on this, and wait for it to turn brown and start to thicken. Look for a guide on google if you haven't made caramel before. It's dead simple, you just need to know when to stop... It's a bit of a tricky point - if it's not thick/dark enough, the caramel will boil when baking in the next step and make a mess of the oven. If it is too dark/brown, it will be hard to spread and may begin to burn.
Once the caramel is ready, immediately pour it over the saltines. Use a spatula to spread it over the whole pan evenly - be careful, the stuff is hot and sticky like napalm.
Throw the pan into the oven for 10 minutes. Keep an eye on it; it should bubble a bit, but if it starts foaming over take it out - the caramel wasn't cooked enough. Just rotate it in and out until it looks like it has thickened.
With the caramel ready, empty the bag of chocolate chips over the whole mess and spread them around with a spatula until even. If they don't melt, put them into the oven (which should be off now!) for a few seconds to speed the melting.
Let the pan cool for a few minutes, then stick it in the freezer until it's cold. Break it apart and eat!
Enjoy, ladies and gents.
A SECOND BOX?
AN EMBARRASSMENT OF RICHES!
I haven't sampled all of them, yet, but I'll take a guess at what they are. Clockwise: 7 layer bars (maybe), Peppermint angel wing sugar cookies (totes adorbs), Some kind of cheese cake type bar thing (whatever it is it's delicious and rich and I am going to eat way too many of those tonight), Pumpkin bar, Pecan crescent cookies, Big huge chocolate chunk cookie thing.
I will not spoil my dinner I will not spoil my dinner I WILL NOT.
Thank you so much, @Lost Salient, these are DELICIOUS.
I'm gonna do all my baking on Sunday and get my box out with Monday's mail.
I hope you enjoy them!
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
Figured I shouldn't spread my illness via treats.
~soon~
I'm glad you enjoy them and I'm sorry I couldn't fit more in the box! I just really didn't want them to break.
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
And Salts*, adding pepper sounds really good, actually. I might have to try that sometime.
*Autocomplete mishap but it stays.
Prepare for cookies, someone.
Also, I am allergic to bees.
I need to step up my game and ship on Monday.
3DS Friend Code: 0216-0898-6512
Switch Friend Code: SW-7437-1538-7786
I always wanted the ol' Jellyroll of the Loom
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
I hope my person likes chocolate
and candy
3DS Friend Code: 0216-0898-6512
Switch Friend Code: SW-7437-1538-7786
I almost had to do the baking by myself as I mistook the youngest nieces home work for left over rice crispy treats.
I didn't know I ate a chunk of a wall to be installed in an edible diorama for her Language Arts class.
"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds" does not apply to UPS it seems.
I am sorry, cookie person.
I got home from work with five minutes to spare between walking in and going back out to tutor, and this was on my doorstep!
Obviously I wasn't going to WAIT TIL I GOT BACK so I ran to get my scissors and busted it open and inside was a note! A note all about your spelling, which was totally fine, and the cookies, which are WAY MORE THAN FINE, and also about how you gave me the recipes just in case! Oh man oh boy!
Incredibly tidy packing job. Did you save those air packets for months, or..?
GOTTA OPEN EVERYTHING FAST
KERPOW! Alton Brown's puffy chocolate chip cookies, chocolate no-bakes, and shortbread cookies in chocolate, lemon, and mocha varieties!
Artfully arranged on a plate. Hey who ate some of that chocolate chip cookie?
Oh, right. I did.
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
"Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
The "puffy" cookies didn't turn out fluffy like they usually do, I think I missed something ingredientwise, just can't remember off the top of my head. Initial testing proved they were still tasty tho.
You always need more cookie recipes, in case of cookie emergency.
Also LS your hair is the best.