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Prison Facts "They" Don't Want You To Know About

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    turtleantturtleant Gunpla Dad is the best.Registered User regular
    How could they commit suicide

    It would be 1000 years in a instant, they wouldn't have the chance

    Edit: Reread the article. Woops guess its actually 8 hours.

    Yeah there would be a hideously high suicide rate

    Well, it's 1000 years in 8 hours. Or 125 years per hour, or 2.08 years per minute, or 12.65 days per second (I might have fucked up the math on that last one).

    So any suicide attempt would mean the person would be feeling the pain of said attempt for, what seems to them, years.

    Not that the person under the influence of this effect would be able to control their body. Hold out your arm straight, now bend your elbow. Takes about a half second. Now imagine that action taking 6 DAYS to complete.

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    WeaverWeaver Who are you? What do you want?Registered User regular
    Shorty wrote: »
    the 25 feet rule has always been bullshit

    I mean you can't smoke on the sidewalk in most of the city

    I will also say that since legalization, drug dealers have gotten way more polite

    now when I turn them down, they tell me to have a nice day instead of to go fuck myself

    yeah

    Just

    arghghghg the busy street corner next to the QFC entrance is not the best place to meet your buddies and smoke a joint no get that shit out of here

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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    Shorty wrote: »
    the 25 feet rule has always been bullshit

    I mean you can't smoke on the sidewalk in most of the city

    I will also say that since legalization, drug dealers have gotten way more polite

    now when I turn them down, they tell me to have a nice day instead of to go fuck myself

    Have you ever tried, "I'm not a chicken, you're a turkey!"?

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    MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    can I go around all the drug dealers for that first free hit, like at costco?

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    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    The dude I got all my stuff from in Seattle was one of those street level guys who hawks his wares in the University district, but he was one of the coolest guys I met up there. And he hooked it up ffffaaaaaatttt

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    DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    Weaver wrote: »
    Shorty wrote: »
    the 25 feet rule has always been bullshit

    I mean you can't smoke on the sidewalk in most of the city

    I will also say that since legalization, drug dealers have gotten way more polite

    now when I turn them down, they tell me to have a nice day instead of to go fuck myself

    yeah

    Just

    arghghghg the busy street corner next to the QFC entrance is not the best place to meet your buddies and smoke a joint no get that shit out of here

    my school just started enforcing a campus wide tobacco smoking ban (it's Santa Cruz, btw, so pot smoking it technically also not okay but frrrrrrrrrrrrrrt)

    all I can think about it is how shitty it's gonna be for the heavier smokers

    like, smoking is bad for you and all that

    but that rule ain't really designed to benefit the smokers

    Miss me? Find me on:

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    GoatmonGoatmon Companion of Kess Registered User regular
    edited March 2014
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    JoeUser wrote: »
    From the weird punishments department:

    Prisoners 'could serve 1,000 year sentence in eight hours'
    Future biotechnology could be used to trick a prisoner's mind into thinking they have served a 1,000 year sentence, a group of scientists have claimed.

    Philosopher Rebecca Roache is in charge of a team of scholars focused upon the ways futuristic technologies might transform punishment. Dr Roache claims the prison sentence of serious criminals could be made worse by extending their lives.

    Speaking to Aeon magazine, Dr Roache said drugs could be developed to distort prisoners' minds into thinking time was passing more slowly.
    This is an onion article only real

    There are real people really working on this

    It's an Outer Limits episode, as well.

    In it, the guy responsible for the technology accidentally gets put into his own machine.

    The moment he came out of it he declared it was unacceptable and proceeded to destroy the equipment and wreck up his own lab.

    Also, from that article:
    "If the speed-up were a factor of a million, a millennium of thinking would be accomplished in eight and a half hours... Uploading the mind of a convicted criminal and running it a million times faster than normal would enable the uploaded criminal to serve a 1,000 year sentence in eight-and-a-half hours. This would, obviously, be much cheaper for the taxpayer than extending criminals’ lifespans to enable them to serve 1,000 years in real time."

    Really, lady? o_O

    Goatmon on
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    RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    Thinking about that literally makes me nauseated. I had an argument with my boss, who endorses locking criminals in solitary confinement and keeping them alive for a life sentence on minimal sustenance, and the idea that this technology could be used by people like that?

    Fucking terrifying. Eyaugh.

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    chromdomchromdom Who? Where?Registered User regular
    Dubh wrote: »
    Weaver wrote: »
    Shorty wrote: »
    the 25 feet rule has always been bullshit

    I mean you can't smoke on the sidewalk in most of the city

    I will also say that since legalization, drug dealers have gotten way more polite

    now when I turn them down, they tell me to have a nice day instead of to go fuck myself

    yeah

    Just

    arghghghg the busy street corner next to the QFC entrance is not the best place to meet your buddies and smoke a joint no get that shit out of here

    my school just started enforcing a campus wide tobacco smoking ban (it's Santa Cruz, btw, so pot smoking it technically also not okay but frrrrrrrrrrrrrrt)

    all I can think about it is how shitty it's gonna be for the heavier smokers

    like, smoking is bad for you and all that

    but that rule ain't really designed to benefit the smokers

    It really seems like it kinda is to benefit the smokers

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    SCREECH OF THE FARGSCREECH OF THE FARG #1 PARROTHEAD margaritavilleRegistered User regular
    don't smoke near me or in places i like to be at please

    gcum67ktu9e4.pngimg
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    PwnanObrienPwnanObrien He's right, life sucks. Registered User regular
    turtleant wrote: »
    I need to share this and this is the closest thing to a government thread. The secret service is sorta kinda related to prisons

    How a Comedy Article Got Me Placed On the No-Fly List

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qhWCk2f2alI

    Mwx884o.jpg
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    Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Pinfeldorf wrote: »
    Jasconius wrote: »
    a great movie script would be where they do that to a guy but he's genetically immune to the treatment so he has to pretend they did that to him and he has a parole officer who keeps checking up on him

    and he has to be all like "man cars sure haven't gotten very much more advanced in a thousand years"

    Cars haven't advanced like, at all in the past 20 years. The differences between the McLaren F1 of 1994 and the fastest supercars we've got now are in single digit percentages.

    I mean, yeah, a lot of the gadgets have changed, but the ceiling for car performance seems to be lower than we originally thought.

    Also, this thing about serving 1000 years in 8 hours reminds me of that Justice League episode where Vandal Savage destroys the earth and Superman gets shot 50,000 years into the future and they become besties. Vandal Savage basically says he's going to keep on living to "serve his sentence" but wouldn't mind being vindicated. It's a pretty cool episode that sort of outlines the brutal psychological distress you'd actually have if you were functionally (literally) immortal.

    Looks like someone isn't keeping up with emissions output and fuel consumption specs!

    Fast cars today can go slightly faster than fast cars from 20 years ago, yes. The big difference is, they use half as much fuel, and put out 1/10th of the emissions!

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    Bluedude152Bluedude152 Registered User regular
    don't smoke near me or in places i like to be at please

    This

    For god sake think of other people

    There is a reason I stopped having to worry about going to the hospital for a asthma attack around the the same time public smoking got banned in minnesota

    p0a2ody6sqnt.jpg
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    CoinageCoinage Heaviside LayerRegistered User regular
    Dubh wrote: »
    Weaver wrote: »
    Shorty wrote: »
    the 25 feet rule has always been bullshit

    I mean you can't smoke on the sidewalk in most of the city

    I will also say that since legalization, drug dealers have gotten way more polite

    now when I turn them down, they tell me to have a nice day instead of to go fuck myself

    yeah

    Just

    arghghghg the busy street corner next to the QFC entrance is not the best place to meet your buddies and smoke a joint no get that shit out of here
    my school just started enforcing a campus wide tobacco smoking ban (it's Santa Cruz, btw, so pot smoking it technically also not okay but frrrrrrrrrrrrrrt)

    all I can think about it is how shitty it's gonna be for the heavier smokers

    like, smoking is bad for you and all that

    but that rule ain't really designed to benefit the smokers
    Yeah I gotta say I don't care about the plight of smokers. If you don't like other people not wanting to be around your disgusting shit, quit smoking.

    Happiness is within reach!
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    JarsJars Registered User regular
    even without any potential health risks cigarette smoke fucking reeks and will not come out of your clothes until they are washed. we have a state wide ban on indoor smoking in new york

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    HeadCreepsHeadCreeps NOW IS THE TIME FOR DRINKING! Registered User regular
    Goatmon wrote: »
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    JoeUser wrote: »
    From the weird punishments department:

    Prisoners 'could serve 1,000 year sentence in eight hours'
    Future biotechnology could be used to trick a prisoner's mind into thinking they have served a 1,000 year sentence, a group of scientists have claimed.

    Philosopher Rebecca Roache is in charge of a team of scholars focused upon the ways futuristic technologies might transform punishment. Dr Roache claims the prison sentence of serious criminals could be made worse by extending their lives.

    Speaking to Aeon magazine, Dr Roache said drugs could be developed to distort prisoners' minds into thinking time was passing more slowly.
    This is an onion article only real

    There are real people really working on this

    It's an Outer Limits episode, as well.

    In it, the guy responsible for the technology accidentally gets put into his own machine.

    The moment he came out of it he declared it was unacceptable and proceeded to destroy the equipment and wreck up his own lab.

    Also, from that article:
    "If the speed-up were a factor of a million, a millennium of thinking would be accomplished in eight and a half hours... Uploading the mind of a convicted criminal and running it a million times faster than normal would enable the uploaded criminal to serve a 1,000 year sentence in eight-and-a-half hours. This would, obviously, be much cheaper for the taxpayer than extending criminals’ lifespans to enable them to serve 1,000 years in real time."

    Really, lady? o_O

    I'm wondering what kind of psychological effects this could possibly have on someone.

    vEaRQgH.png
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    Phoenix-DPhoenix-D Registered User regular
    It would essentially be solitary, times...the entire human lifespan several times over. I can't imagine anyone coming out of it sane. Or even close to sane.

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    Captain MarcusCaptain Marcus now arrives the hour of actionRegistered User regular
    Goatmon wrote: »
    Also, from that article:
    "If the speed-up were a factor of a million, a millennium of thinking would be accomplished in eight and a half hours... Uploading the mind of a convicted criminal and running it a million times faster than normal would enable the uploaded criminal to serve a 1,000 year sentence in eight-and-a-half hours. This would, obviously, be much cheaper for the taxpayer than extending criminals’ lifespans to enable them to serve 1,000 years in real time."

    Really, lady? o_O

    Oh man. Uploaded? Like, to a computer? That runs into the Eclipse Phase/Star Trek Teleporter issue- what gets uploaded/teleported might look like you, but since your body is destroyed it's not the original you. It's a copy. You're dead!

    And then mankind is torturing artificial AIs for the sins of their human predecessors, and then installing them into (presumably) brain-dead clones. Ethically horrifying, morally black, and has the potential to backfire on us spectacularly. Are you sure this woman isn't Valeria Doom or something?


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    Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    edited March 2014
    The head researcher's name is actually Dr. Roache
    the name is almost designed to disgust you

    Also note that she's described as a philosopher, i.e. not somebody who is actually qualified to develop or work on any such technology
    I don't think this is actually like, a thing that's ever going to happen

    If they're all philosophers then it sounds like a lot of sitting around and saying "oh man WHAT IF, right"

    Grey Ghost on
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    Captain MarcusCaptain Marcus now arrives the hour of actionRegistered User regular
    edited March 2014
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    Also note that she's described as a philosopher, i.e. not somebody who is actually qualified to develop or work on any such technology
    I don't think this is actually like, a thing that's ever going to happen

    Oh, so it's like when people in the 50s came up with ideas about what THE FUTURE would be
    9781588168221_a152-mdn.jpg

    except terrible

    edit-

    She really is from the Onion!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hyph_DZa_GQ

    Captain Marcus on
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    Crimson KingCrimson King Registered User regular
    actually there's another story i read somewhere about a teleportation device that lasts longer on the inside than the outside, so if you go in unsedated you wind up alive and conscious in nothingness for, like, a quadrillion years

    it's a pretty easy scenario to fabricate

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    Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    actually there's another story i read somewhere about a teleportation device that lasts longer on the inside than the outside, so if you go in unsedated you wind up alive and conscious in nothingness for, like, a quadrillion years

    it's a pretty easy scenario to fabricate

    The Jaunt, by Stephen King - I think it was mentioned upthread.

    [Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]
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    Crimson KingCrimson King Registered User regular
    it's amazing to me how many people are like, yo, if we just punished the tiniest and most insignificant crimes with the most gruesome tortures we can come up with there would be no more crime! and they totally deserve it, because they're criminals!

    first, we tried that already, it was called the last four thousand years of human history. people have been getting disembowelled and suffering the death of a thousand cuts for the medieval equivalent of jaywalking for a very long time, and there were still crimes around in the eleventh century

    second, you just know that these are the exact same people who, if presented with the opportunity to commit a crime, would unhesitatingly find some way to justify why it was okay and the guy they were robbing, or whatever, totally deserved it. and they would never make the connection between how they think and this abstract, otherized, probably non-white class of mysterious people called criminals thinks. there is no sense of, hey, maybe in the right circumstances i could be this guy and therefore i should cut him a break. it's just a complete lack of empathy

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    Crimson KingCrimson King Registered User regular
    actually there's another story i read somewhere about a teleportation device that lasts longer on the inside than the outside, so if you go in unsedated you wind up alive and conscious in nothingness for, like, a quadrillion years

    it's a pretty easy scenario to fabricate

    The Jaunt, by Stephen King - I think it was mentioned upthread.

    yeah i actually knew that, i was pretending not to know the name so as not to spoil it. but it turns out smof said it already so whatever

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    Crimson KingCrimson King Registered User regular
    my campus also has a total smoking ban but thankfully it is not very well enforced

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    AntimatterAntimatter Devo Was Right Gates of SteelRegistered User regular
    CK i finally noticed your title and location today

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    Crimson KingCrimson King Registered User regular
    Antimatter wrote: »
    CK i finally noticed your title and location today

    it was such an elegant summation i felt the world needed to see

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    MuzzmuzzMuzzmuzz Registered User regular
    While I agree on some pretty draconian restrictions on smoking areas, I think my area has taken it too far. Not only do you have to be a certain distance away from buildings, but if you're a smoker, you are not allowed to take shelter under pretty much anything. Surprisingly, it's not the cops that will get you, it's random people. For example, my place of work has a bench, and an enclosed garage, separate from the building. This is where we keep our garbage and recycling bins/ Smoking employees went out there to smoke, but only in bad weather. Apparently, someone's been actively surveillancing it, and calls the Health Department any time they see someone smoke in it.

    Now the smokers have to sit out in the open, where there is both crummy weather and dirty crackheads demanding a smoke. Not to mention, they've dealt with the sneers of customers who assume that the smokers aren't on a break, they're just loafing around having a cig.


    I can't believe I just defended smokers......

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    GoatmonGoatmon Companion of Kess Registered User regular
    edited March 2014
    I never really cared to bug people about smoking, as long as I have the option to just walk somewhere else.



    it's amazing to me how many people are like, yo, if we just punished the tiniest and most insignificant crimes with the most gruesome tortures we can come up with there would be no more crime! and they totally deserve it, because they're criminals!

    first, we tried that already, it was called the last four thousand years of human history

    Also some parts of the world are still doing stuff along these lines, such as thieves occasionally getting their hands cut off in Iran.

    Goatmon on
    Switch Friend Code: SW-6680-6709-4204


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    Crimson KingCrimson King Registered User regular
    and you just know there's a whole cadre of tattooed guys in bars/fedoraed guys on somethingawful (surprising amount of ideological overlap there) complaining that we don't have the judicial policies of saudi arabia

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    King RiptorKing Riptor Registered User regular
    Muzzmuzz wrote: »
    While I agree on some pretty draconian restrictions on smoking areas, I think my area has taken it too far. Not only do you have to be a certain distance away from buildings, but if you're a smoker, you are not allowed to take shelter under pretty much anything. Surprisingly, it's not the cops that will get you, it's random people. For example, my place of work has a bench, and an enclosed garage, separate from the building. This is where we keep our garbage and recycling bins/ Smoking employees went out there to smoke, but only in bad weather. Apparently, someone's been actively surveillancing it, and calls the Health Department any time they see someone smoke in it.

    Now the smokers have to sit out in the open, where there is both crummy weather and dirty crackheads demanding a smoke. Not to mention, they've dealt with the sneers of customers who assume that the smokers aren't on a break, they're just loafing around having a cig.


    I can't believe I just defended smokers......

    Its easy to forget theyre cancer pathogens

    I have a podcast now. It's about video games and anime!Find it here.
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    Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Goatmon wrote: »
    I never really cared to bug people about smoking, as long as I have the option to just walk somewhere else.
    it's amazing to me how many people are like, yo, if we just punished the tiniest and most insignificant crimes with the most gruesome tortures we can come up with there would be no more crime! and they totally deserve it, because they're criminals!

    first, we tried that already, it was called the last four thousand years of human history

    Also some parts of the world are still doing stuff along these lines, such as thieves occasionally getting their hands cut off in Iran.

    Funny thing about persecuting criminals, if their choice is between stealing food and if they get caught having a hand chopped off or starving to death in a gutter, guess what they'll pick 100% of the time?

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    Crimson KingCrimson King Registered User regular
    Muzzmuzz wrote: »
    While I agree on some pretty draconian restrictions on smoking areas, I think my area has taken it too far. Not only do you have to be a certain distance away from buildings, but if you're a smoker, you are not allowed to take shelter under pretty much anything. Surprisingly, it's not the cops that will get you, it's random people. For example, my place of work has a bench, and an enclosed garage, separate from the building. This is where we keep our garbage and recycling bins/ Smoking employees went out there to smoke, but only in bad weather. Apparently, someone's been actively surveillancing it, and calls the Health Department any time they see someone smoke in it.

    Now the smokers have to sit out in the open, where there is both crummy weather and dirty crackheads demanding a smoke. Not to mention, they've dealt with the sneers of customers who assume that the smokers aren't on a break, they're just loafing around having a cig.


    I can't believe I just defended smokers......

    Its easy to forget theyre cancer pathogens

    riptor did you know that the fellow in your avatar is, himself, smoking

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    King RiptorKing Riptor Registered User regular
    Muzzmuzz wrote: »
    While I agree on some pretty draconian restrictions on smoking areas, I think my area has taken it too far. Not only do you have to be a certain distance away from buildings, but if you're a smoker, you are not allowed to take shelter under pretty much anything. Surprisingly, it's not the cops that will get you, it's random people. For example, my place of work has a bench, and an enclosed garage, separate from the building. This is where we keep our garbage and recycling bins/ Smoking employees went out there to smoke, but only in bad weather. Apparently, someone's been actively surveillancing it, and calls the Health Department any time they see someone smoke in it.

    Now the smokers have to sit out in the open, where there is both crummy weather and dirty crackheads demanding a smoke. Not to mention, they've dealt with the sneers of customers who assume that the smokers aren't on a break, they're just loafing around having a cig.


    I can't believe I just defended smokers......

    Its easy to forget theyre cancer pathogens

    riptor did you know that the fellow in your avatar is, himself, smoking

    Yes.

    Shockingly I dont have to condone a characters behavior even if I enjoy the stories he's in.


    I have a podcast now. It's about video games and anime!Find it here.
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    PoorochondriacPoorochondriac Ah, man Ah, jeezRegistered User regular
    Sorry Riptor, you gotta change your avatar or start smoking

    Check the rules thread

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    BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    Thankfully for Pooro he already has regular chocolate fondue sex with his coworker and a billionaire while being monitored by his mother.

    Battletag BYToady#1454
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    Crimson KingCrimson King Registered User regular
    i just thought it was funny

    now if you'll excuse me i have to get back to contemplating enlightenment and HOLY SHIT IS THAT A BIRD

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    KharnorKharnor Registered User regular
    Gurgeh attempted to explain there were no written laws, but almost no crime anyway. There was the occasional crime of passion (as Hamin chose to call it) but little else. It was difficult to get away with anything anyway, when everybody had a terminal, but there were very few motives left, too.
    “But what if someone kills somebody else?"
    Gurgeh shrugged. "They're slap-droned."
    "Ah! This sounds more like it. What does that drone do?"
    "Follows you around and makes sure you never do it again."
    "Is that all?"
    "What more do you want? Social death, Hamin; you don't get invited to too many parties."
    "Ah; but in your Culture, can't you gatecrash?"
    "I suppose so," Gurgeh conceded. "But nobody'd talk to you.”

    Iain M. Banks, The Player of Games

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    Mortal SkyMortal Sky queer punk hedge witchRegistered User regular
    Rest in peace, Iain M. Banks, you brilliant man.

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    Fleur de AlysFleur de Alys Biohacker Registered User regular
    edited March 2014
    Proposed tech sounds terrifying, but it could be used for actual good as well.

    Assuming we're already talking about uploading people's consciousness so that seconds become days, it wouldn't be too farfetched to say that you could also place them into a virtual reality sort of environment that would make their surroundings seem to move at the same pace as their minds. So, you could actually have them live out a simulated, torture-free, rehabilitation-themed experience in a very short amount of time. Prisons themselves would actually literally be phased out completely; you'd just have a couple rooms where you sit someone for a few minutes to serve their entire sentence and, hopefully, emerge rehabilitated. Or at least having gone through a prison-like experience without all the really bad (illegal) things that happens to prisoners right now.

    The real kicker, of course, is how such tech would completely transform human society as we know it. If you could live even 1 year in 24 hours in a decent virtual space, basically everyone who had access to this tech would use it whenever possible. Your effective lifespan would lengthen by a factor of 365. Forget jails; this would be, by far, the most utterly transformative force to have ever impacted humanity.

    Fleur de Alys on
    Triptycho: A card-and-dice tabletop indie RPG currently in development and playtesting
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