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Changing One's Personality

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    ObsObs __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2007
    It's perfect possibly to change a personality. In fact it's very easy in some cases.

    Example

    Obs on
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    nexuscrawlernexuscrawler Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    The good thing about my separation is using my experience being married on my dates. Spending 6 years with a girl showed me what a girl likes. I guess you can call that a personality improvement, maybe?

    No, you learnt what your wife likes.

    I think he just learned to be arrogant yet still so dumb

    nexuscrawler on
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    ViolentChemistryViolentChemistry __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2007
    The good thing about my separation is using my experience being married on my dates. Spending 6 years with a girl showed me what a girl likes. I guess you can call that a personality improvement, maybe?

    No, you learnt what your wife likes.

    I think he just learned to be arrogant yet still so dumb

    He learned how to chase someone away even if they love him just by being himself.

    ViolentChemistry on
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    FerrusFerrus Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    I find it nigh impossible to really change my behaviour, and gods I did try. Still, I'm an arrogant asshole at times and hard to associate with. But, as some other folks mentioned already, through a change of environment (New school, diffrent friends, finding a fitting subculture for myself), it got better.
    My mother commented on my new, straight manner of walking for example. I didn't notice it at first but the change is there.

    I guess the best way of improving ones character is some form of radical change of environment, some form of catharsis. The only hard part is to actually do something to change the way one lives.

    Ferrus on
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    DynagripDynagrip Break me a million hearts HoustonRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited April 2007
    I can't exactly change my personality but uh, I sort of can thanks to nature. Though it's more moods really but the severity of it might seem like personality change to the uninformed.

    Dynagrip on
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    MalkorMalkor Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    There are lots of theories on personality. I really like Maslow's hierarchy of needs I think that it's an interesting way to think about your personality and how it relates to the other facets of your life.
    Maslows_hierarchy_of_needs.png

    The bottom layers are the easiest to change, and the easiest to see changed but have a bigger effect on the top two needs. I really think the top two layers are a nice representation of what we commonly describe as 'personality'. There's a distinction between personality and behavior though. Good people do bad things, people who live a moral life have secrets they don't want shared and all that good stuff. I don't remember if this theory addresses that.

    Malkor on
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    GihgehlsGihgehls Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    thoughts become words
    words become actions
    actions become habits
    habits become character
    character becomes destiny

    Gihgehls on
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    FallingmanFallingman Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    I'm not sure Maslows Hierchy was ever supposed to be in relation to "personality" as such... more motivations and priorities. You could argue "Behaviour" I guess... But I'm not sure how it really fits in realtion to personality changing.

    Fallingman on
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    NogsNogs Crap, crap, mega crap. Crap, crap, mega crap.Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    I would like to think that Personality is the sum of one's experiences. I know for a fact that my personality has changed over the past 10 years(granted I'm still pretty young so it was bound to). In retrospect I am able to look at my past experiences and see a road leading up to where I am now. Those experiences and choices that I made have directly affected the way I think and feel today.

    One's upbringing, relationships, and major significant events in one's life are what lead people to conclusions about morality, humor, happiness, etc.

    At least, thats the way I see it.

    Nogs on
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    OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2007
    Maslow's Hierarchy included 'gender identity' for a brief period a few years back. The Health textbooks my high school bought, which were new at the time, had it grouped in with Safety. I think the newest pyramids have freedom of sexual expression punched in somewhere, too, but they nixed the mention of gender identity.

    It was very empowering, still, to see it in that one version of the Hierarchy, because it validated how overwhelmingly distraught I was that I wasn't receiving that security, and it made me feel less at fault for how my life was tumbling out of control.

    Maybe I'm misremembering. Either way, the Hierarchy is a good thing.

    Oboro on
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    ege02ege02 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2007
    Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs is alright. Not that great though. The only thing I agree with it is the terms by themselves. There is no evidence whatsoever of an existing hierarchy between them.

    ege02 on
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    SarcastroSarcastro Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    I think there will always be traits that are hard-wired into one's system. There's some pretty funky neuroscience going on in the late teens when the brain goes through it's last stages of completion. Once that stuff is built, it's virtually impossible to change. Your personality type is going to be pretty much the same from there on out.

    I do think that a person can change by selective focus though. Choosing what sort of information you take in is an important part of changing one's perspective and outlook on life. You can choose to not htink or do certain things, and over time you can change a great deal about yourself. The core will always remain, you will want the same (root) things, and you will have roughly the same set of prioritized personal needs - but the methodology in achieving those things can certainly change, as well as the definitions of what those needs are.

    Early on you might think you want eighteen piercings and some kickass leatherboots, but later you might realize that what you truly desire is to be loved and appreciated as an individual, and your trappings were just a method of getting you somodat. Getting down to the basics of what one is truly looking for in life often redefines the process of how to get it, and by changing your thoughts and processes to align with those new goals one can effectively change how they are percieved by themselves and others.

    Sarcastro on
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    ege02ege02 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited April 2007
    Sarcastro wrote: »
    I think there will always be traits that are hard-wired into one's system. There's some pretty funky neuroscience going on in the late teens when the brain goes through it's last stages of completion. Once that stuff is built, it's virtually impossible to change. Your personality type is going to be pretty much the same from there on out.

    While I agree that as you grow up, it gets harder to change your personality, I disagree that it ever becomes "virtually impossible".

    ege02 on
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    SarcastroSarcastro Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    ege02 wrote: »
    Sarcastro wrote: »
    I think there will always be traits that are hard-wired into one's system. There's some pretty funky neuroscience going on in the late teens when the brain goes through it's last stages of completion. Once that stuff is built, it's virtually impossible to change. Your personality type is going to be pretty much the same from there on out.

    While I agree that as you grow up, it gets harder to change your personality, I disagree that it ever becomes "virtually impossible".

    An indirect reference to the Myers-Briggs personality profiling system. Barring a brain injury, a person's personality profile remains the same from thier teens until death. (No doubt exceptions are possible, but as of this post I haven't heard of any.)

    Sarcastro on
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    MalkorMalkor Registered User regular
    edited April 2007
    The part of Maslow I liked the most was the hierarchecal part. The basic parts of life set you up for the more vague stuff like morality and creativity. If you don't eat you can't have self-esteem, 'cause you'd be dead eventually. If you don't have the vague notion of love and belonging, how can you respect others or not be prejudiced all the time? It can't possibly explain all the complex relationships between each factor of your life that results in what you and others perceive as 'personality', but I think its a good start.

    Malkor on
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