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Can sosial media be indirectely involved or lead to divorces?

msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
edited August 2014 in Debate and/or Discourse
Hi.
It could be complicated, but it's reallt this simple:

We having a cozy dinner with homemade pasta and candle lights on the table.
I get caught up in some thoughts and when I look past the table my bf is gone.
I eat up some strings of my pasta and walks out in the office.
There is my bf writing something on Penny Arcade.
I confront him and he wawing a note with the cinema code (to get the tickets from the machine) but this not sounds very convincing, wich the matter of fact was that he were writing a status update/comment on Penny Arcade.
I get really pisst and stays home while he driving to the cinema.

Yay or Nay?
This is not the first time and my motive for posting it here is that , offcourse he sees it, and get his internet addicted fucked up brain some common sense.

Best regards soon to be married?

msjohanson on

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    Mojo_JojoMojo_Jojo We are only now beginning to understand the full power and ramifications of sexual intercourse Registered User regular
    edited August 2014
    Wawing?

    This would be better off in the help and advice forum.

    Mojo_Jojo on
    Homogeneous distribution of your varieties of amuse-gueule
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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    Wawing: holding the ticket while he moves the arm.

    Don't bureaucrate this shit, please.

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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    I mean by bueraucratic: Is this question so hard that it have to be in the advice section? Does the answer require overhuman socially skills to understand?
    I would think that if this question was to hard for a debate and disc. I' d surely raise questions.

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    YogoYogo Registered User regular
    edited August 2014
    It belongs in the Help and Advice forum because it is a personal topic wherein you wish for the advice of others.

    Debate and Discourse is suited for broad topics wherein users can discuss events without (hopefully) treading upon each other.

    Yogo on
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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    Then I change the topic to: Can sosial media be indirectely involved or lead to divorces?

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    V1mV1m Registered User regular
    Bad behaviour leads to divorces, and social media makes it very easy to do and say potentially damaging things which are hard to undo.

    For instance, deliberately posting this where you know your husband will read it.

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    Mojo_JojoMojo_Jojo We are only now beginning to understand the full power and ramifications of sexual intercourse Registered User regular
    msjohanson wrote: »
    Wawing: holding the ticket while he moves the arm.
    .

    I'm still not clear. Was he foruming? Dancing? Pretending to dance to cover his foruming? And how does the cinema enter into this?

    Homogeneous distribution of your varieties of amuse-gueule
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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    Yes I'm aware. Would you suggest me to talk with him? Check
    Or would you actually have the balls to say what you think?
    My solution was when social media do work and interact so intens with private peoples life I choose to use social media to take it back.
    Yes, I'm aware and I'm fed up!

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    King RiptorKing Riptor Registered User regular
    You need to spellcheck because youre becoming increasingly incoherent and your argument is already absurd at best

    I have a podcast now. It's about video games and anime!Find it here.
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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    Well, I do think things through before I act so I don't regret and that's what I like with threads.
    The timeline: people changing interest, sweetharts a d even political opinions or religion. That's why I for instant don't care if friends tagging me in unfortunate pics.
    Hey this was me at 03AM 2010 . I was tired/ugly/fat whatever . But that was at that spesific time. And that was past. People do evolve and I always consider timeline when I read others description, comments , pics whatever.

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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    King riptor: FY I'm from Norway. And I heard my bf say excately this to me before too, so I know where it comes from.
    Maybe you should spellcheck your fucking alpha-dominant brain before this get absurd, it's that clear enough?!?

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    CasualCasual Wiggle Wiggle Wiggle Flap Flap Flap Registered User regular
    OK, first up dude we have standards of behaviour here, if you wanna debate this in a d&d way you're going to have to check the attitude and not swear at people when they want to actually debate the topic. Secondly if you're making this entirely about you and your situation then yeah, this should be in H/A not here.

    But if you act like this in H/A the thread will get locked in there just like it'll get locked in here.

    As for the topic, yeah of course social media can cause divorces. My peripheral experience of Facebook is that it is a drama producing machine. There is something about it that seems to make people forget they're posting all their stuff in a public place. Once you put anything up there for the world to see interpreting it is at the mercy of the mood and predjudices of the person reading it. Never mind the fact that, as anyone who has spent any amount of time on forums knows, communicating meaning through text alone can be tricky.

    Humans rely on facial expressions and body language to set the context of a given statement quite a lot. Without these things we have a bad habit of assuming the worst.

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    King RiptorKing Riptor Registered User regular
    msjohanson wrote: »
    King riptor: FY I'm from Norway. And I heard my bf say excately this to me before too, so I know where it comes from.
    Maybe you should spellcheck your fucking alpha-dominant brain before this get absurd, it's that clear enough?!?



    No!

    No its not!

    I have a podcast now. It's about video games and anime!Find it here.
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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    First of all King Riptor uses an argument of incomatibilsm were the only motive is to trash everything I've said. This argument is so good that even my bf used it for several years. It's not true thoug, I'm norwegian, he is danish and we both have langauage difficulties.
    So for King Riptor using excately these words is highly negative.

    Second: Decent nice behavior; I've read threads here before so don't make me laugh about proper behavior.

    Third: Social media will cause divorces if the social network makes it hard for frustrated spouses.

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    King RiptorKing Riptor Registered User regular
    Ive literally not argued a thing except that your argument is absurd and that is because its a threat to someone and not a stance on a topic.

    On top of that Im apparently a mysognist or whatever an an alpha brain is because I asked you to be coherent. God forbid a text based medium be readable.




    I have a podcast now. It's about video games and anime!Find it here.
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    TraceTrace GNU Terry Pratchett; GNU Gus; GNU Carrie Fisher; GNU Adam We Registered User regular
    Ive literally not argued a thing except that your argument is absurd and that is because its a threat to someone and not a stance on a topic.

    On top of that Im apparently a mysognist or whatever an an alpha brain is because I asked you to be coherent. God forbid a text based medium be readable.




    Don%27t_Feed_the_Troll.jpeg

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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    I see troll feeds troll now. I can be a nice and polite person but you guys does' nt make it better.

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    TraceTrace GNU Terry Pratchett; GNU Gus; GNU Carrie Fisher; GNU Adam We Registered User regular
    I apologize.

    But this is not the place to air your grievances with your significant other.

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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    Mojo-sojo (whatever) let's say he was dancing :)

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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    edited August 2014
    msjohanson was warned for this.
    I'm not grieving you cunt! Why don't you read the title on this thread and start over. Does social media leds to divorces?
    Let's say the opening text was like this.
    "It could be complicated, but it's really this simple:"

    A couple having a cozy dinner with homemade pasta and candle lights on the table.
    She get caught up in some thoughts and when she look past the table her bf is gone.
    She eat up some strings of her pasta and walks out in the office.
    There is the bf writing something on Penny Arcade.
    Shd confront him and he wawing a note with the cinema code (to get the tickets from the machine) but this not sounds very convincing, wich the matter of fact was that he were writing a status update/comment on Penny Arcade.
    She get really pisst and stays home while he driving to the cinema.

    While she writes a thread about this in Penny arcade she gets a lot of negative comments saying her topi don't fit in and she got users that defends their arguments because they're mysognists and writes arguments of incomatibilsm.

    So the topic is: can social media lead to divorce?

    Jacobkosh on
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    PLAPLA The process.Registered User regular
    What is incomatibilism?

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    Death of RatsDeath of Rats Registered User regular
    If your significant other posting online real quick is something you've decided is a deal breaker then yes, social media can lead to divorce.

    But if someone having interests other that their significant other and them following those interests is a deal breaker then pretty much anything they do will lead to divorce because they're in a relationship with someone who wants a puppy, not a partner.

    No I don't.
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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    What excately do you imply? Is it normal to leave the table in the middle of the dinner to status update?

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    see317see317 Registered User regular
    msjohanson wrote: »
    So the topic is: can social media lead to divorce?
    I'm not sure what you expect to be debated about on this topic, because it seems really open and shut here.
    Bad behavior often leads to divorce (not saying that it's the only cause for divorce, but it's a big one). Cheating, lying, etc...
    Social Media makes it very easy for a person who is behaving badly to be found out, while also making it easier to behave poorly. A check-in at a restaurant, a tweet or a posted photo that a spouse doesn't recognize, being tagged in someone else's photo... The ways to be caught are only expanding as social media grows.
    That of course doesn't begin to include poor behaviors that social media enables. Distractions caused by tweeting, messaging, facebooking during romantic moments can be infuriating. Publicly posting conversations or comments that should be private, or posting passive aggressive complaints in a place where the SO is almost guaranteed to see them. The list of ways that Social Media can negatively impact a relationship is endless.

    In this specific case, I think that She may be overreacting. It's entirely possible that He was preordering/reserving (sorry, I'm not familiar with "wawing" so I may be inferring the wrong definition) tickets and opened up a second tab to browse the forums while waiting for a confirmation email. If that's the case, it's easily possible that he lost track of time while reading a thread or responding to something.
    Yes, it seems kind of lousy to sneak out of a romantic candle light dinner to hit the forums. On the other hand, if She's zoning out on the same dinner ("Getting caught up in some thoughts") to the point where Her BF can disappear and His absence isn't noticed for 5-10 minutes... Maybe He wasn't the only person that wasn't completely mentally present at the time.

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    MarathonMarathon Registered User regular
    So, you were eating dinner and got distracted and when you looked up your boyfriend was at the computer.

    It made you upset that he would get up and leave during dinner, so you confronted him about it. His explanation was that he was getting some movie tickets online, but you don't believe that because you saw penny arcade open on the screen.

    Now you're really mad so you stayed home while he went to the movie.

    Sounds like a lack of maturity on both your parts. He shouldn't have just got up and left during dinner, but unless that happens often I don't see the real offense. Your response after the fact was equally bad, and continuing things by making a thread here is another poor decision.

    I don't think social media is to blame in this case, just a lack of maturity.

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    Death of RatsDeath of Rats Registered User regular
    msjohanson wrote: »
    What excately do you imply? Is it normal to leave the table in the middle of the dinner to status update?

    It isn't necessarily normal but it's not something I'd personally get really upset about.

    My question is why is it OK for you to mentally check out and not OK for them to physically check out?

    No I don't.
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    Death of RatsDeath of Rats Registered User regular
    A relationship isn't about always spending time with your SO completely uniterupted. It's about enjoying the time you do spend together enough where you want to do that for the rest of your life.

    If you think everything is going to be focused on just the two of you together forever, wait until you have kids. It very quickly becomes apparent that any amount of problems like this will surely destroy your marriage.

    No I don't.
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    msjohansonmsjohanson Registered User regular
    He was typing. And pressed "Enter" , one other time I was wearing some sexy lingerie and went in the room dancing for him, he turned his eyes to me and then he returned them to the computer screen posting on penny arcade. Allright?

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    Apothe0sisApothe0sis Have you ever questioned the nature of your reality? Registered User regular
    Maybe he wasn't in the mood? Does his libido have to conform to your schedule?

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    Death of RatsDeath of Rats Registered User regular
    Would you feel OK with him having complete control over what you can / can not do at any moment?

    No I don't.
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    MarathonMarathon Registered User regular
    edited August 2014
    Apo has a point, he could have just not been in the mood for whatever reason. But it was insensitive of him for not giving more recognition of you when you were trying to do something special and you're in a somewhat vulnerable position.

    These are things the two of you should be talking about with each other, especially before you get married.

    Marathon on
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    JacobkoshJacobkosh Gamble a stamp. I can show you how to be a real man!Moderator mod
    I don't think this thread serves anyone's purposes at all.

    Geth, close the thread.

This discussion has been closed.