ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderatormod
Oh man that's amazing!
I will be out that way in June to visit my family (I'm from that area), and I'll totally buy you a drink.
I mostly had wanted to know if you were close enough to my family that maybe they could help, but it sounds like you guys have everything under control.
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
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KoopahTroopahThe koopas, the troopas.Philadelphia, PARegistered Userregular
So I just had a conversation with my dad to try and get more details on when exactly we're getting my sister. We're gonna take it slow and just have visits for now while she primarily lives over at my mom's. I'm not thrilled about it, but if we try to take her out right away he doesn't think my mom would go for it. He's gonna meet with his lawyer (that being lawyer B, now that A is out of the picture) and work out the custody claim to make our house her primary residence and go from there.
KoopahTroopahThe koopas, the troopas.Philadelphia, PARegistered Userregular
edited February 2015
Today was really harsh for my sister and I. I'll try to update later tonight on it, but something happened today and a lot is up in the air right now. All I can say right now is that my sister is with us, I think for good from here on out.
ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderatormod
I'm glad she's with you and you're both safe.
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
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KoopahTroopahThe koopas, the troopas.Philadelphia, PARegistered Userregular
edited February 2015
Right, so here we go. In short, today sucked.
I had a hard time sleeping last night because I was worried about my father's surgery this morning. So I ended up getting 3 or 4 hours of sleep before waking up today at 5:45am and driving my dad to the hospital for his hernia operation. I dropped him off and he was able to go in and get taken care of without me being there, so I drove home and tried to get more rest. I had laid down for an hour but couldn't really fall asleep. That's when my mom started texting me. Here's a direct transcript:
Mom - Can you please be kind enough to let me know about your father?
Me - Yep. Sure.
Mom - Thank You.
Mom - The cable, etc is in my name. I am having it switched to my address, so I will need ALL the Verizon equipment packed up when I come on Saturday. Dad will have to get his own.
Mom - Sorry, but that's part of splitting up
Me - Well you can talk to him about that. I think it would be easier to just call in and switch names on the current account.
Mom - Nope. ..already done.
Mom - Sorry
Me - Alright, whatever. Look, I'm here to help. But please do not try to take advantage of him being in surgery, like you try to leverage your daughter instead of thinking of her best interests.
Me - I'll pack up everything for Saturday.
Mom - You wanted it to be settled. He isn't being fair to me AT ALL....at least I am letting Cassandra come!
Mom - The judge didn't want to let her....
Me - That sounds exactly opposite of what I was told.
Me - I'm not arguing over text. I'll pack whatever I need to for Saturday.
Mom - I am not....bullshit. ...but you're a big boy...I took what was MINE
Mom - I am trying to keep her out of it. ...he wants to take her. Ask her what SHE WANTS
Me - You can justify it all you want, but don't lie to my face and then ask me for help, okay? She wanted to stay here and still does.
Mom - Nevermind, just please have everything ready. Remember, I am your mother. It's your problem if you can't deal
Mom - NOPE. ...SHE TOLD DAD
Mom - Whatever, I don't need to answer to you
Me - It's my problem? I can't deal with a lunatic who can't sit down and reason things like an adult and would rather go through the legal system at the expense of your daughters well being.
Me - Fine. I'll pack up the verizon stuff and tell you how dad does.
Mom - Thank you
Mom - Hahaha. ...brainwashed
Mom - Yeah, your father, the martyr. ...did you know that he is,putting wiccan spells on me? N has [exploitive deleted for unwarranted personal stuff]
Mom - But I'm a lunatic. ...SMFH
Me - Let's just say you make it easy to be on the other side.
Me - I don't have any idea about that because it's none of my business. But the well being of my sister is totally my business.
Mom - You can CHOOSE , I can't stop you. Just remember WHO WAS,THERE FOR YOU
Mom - Who took a $10/hr pay cut to be at home and take care of EVERYTHING
Mom - Again, I don't answer to you
Me - You're right. You don't.
Mom - You don't want to remember anything, or even talk about it with me, but you do with your father?
Me - Like you'd even listen to me. I really wasn't in the mood for a text war either.
Mom - SMFH....EVEN YOUR FRIENDS WILL SAY IT!
So this was around 8:50 to 9:15am. Afterwards I couldn't get it out of my head. First off, I admit I might have been a little harsh, but I really was holding back instead of just blowing up completely on her. But when she threatened to take the Verizon service, when she already has internet and TV at her house, just because she can, I flipped. Even after I offered a better solution that would have been easier for both parties, just to get told "No, sorry. Pack my shit." Second, I think the fact that she opened with generally being concerned about my father's health before trying to push me around to packing up her things for her really got to me. Next she went on to completely state the opposite that my father said had happened during the hearing, which just riled me up more. I even have the text from my sister from the following Saturday after she was taken that she wanted to live with us instead of my mom. I think just being in the new situation with my mom after a couple days was enough to realize the mood swings and constant yelling would never stop. Then... uh... "wiccan spells"? Are you serious? I legit scoffed at that one, like wh...what? Finally, to end the whole thing with my friends will believe her over me. Even if it were true, why the hell would I give a shit? Even if they did, then they're not my friends. Anyone with eyes can see that I'm just a nice guy trying to take care of his sister and wants zero personal gain. Period. Ugh, I was so frustrated with this it was incredible. So I laid down again and tossed and turned for two more hours until it was time to go get my dad.
My dad was done and ready to leave the hospital around 11am, so then I went over and helped him get dressed and escorted him to my car, where we drove to the pharmacy to pick up gauze, medical tape, and prescribed pain meds from the hospital. Now it's around noon and I texted my mom about my dad because I said I would.
Me - Dad's okay. A little sore but he's fine. What time are you getting your stuff tomorrow?
Mom - That's up to dad....pick a time
Mom - Also, please let him know that my dad will be here from February 27th-March 7th. I don't think that your sister will want to stay with Pop, but that's up to her n dad
Mom - N I don't need stress and high school drama either
Me - We'll let you know. We gotta talk about it and he just got home and is resting.
Mom - No problem, thank you
So yeah she wants no stress or drama? Right... Anyways, moving along. My dad is home resting so I started doing some chores to help out around the house. I did my laundry, washed the dishes, cleaned out my cats litter box, and even attempted to give my cats a bath. Side note, giving cats baths is really difficult. I have scratches like crazy, but at least my kitties are clean and smell really nice! It's around 3pm now, so I took a shower and changed into some pajamas so I could relax, because I was just exhausted at this point. Well when I got out of the shower and changed, my sister had called me. Crying again.
She only said to come get her from mom's house. She didn't say why, she just said to hurry up. So I texted my mom to see what the hell is going on.
Me - Hey, what's the deal?
Mom - She wants to live there come and get her NOW
Mom - N she has an appointment at 5 with her psychologist
Me - I got it, on the way
Mom - Thanks for starting all the shit
Me - Of course...
So I head over there immediately. My sister calls me while I'm on the way, still crying her eyes out. My mother had told my sister to pack her shit, and kicked her out of her fucking house. Like literally went through her room, threw her stuff at my sister and into garbage bags, pushed her outside and slammed the door on her in 16 degree F weather. She's ELEVEN YEARS OLD! How can you be such a cruel person to your own fucking child!? You're mad she's not doing what you want, so you kick her out of your house in freezing conditions. This blows, my fucking mind. I'm so furious that I speed over there as quick as I can, but it's now like 4pm on a Friday so there's tons of traffic. I finally get there, and my sister is standing there on the sidewalk with two ripped up trash bags full of clothes and her book bag. Probably the saddest thing I think I've had to see so far. Thank god she was bundled up in clothes because it was freezing outside today. I told her to pack her stuff into the car and wait there, and walk up to my mom's house and pummel on the door. My mom takes her sweet time coming to the door, screaming her head off, with her arms held out...
Mom - WHAT?!
Me - What's your deal?!
Mom - What?! She doesn't want to live with me!
Me - So you kick her out of your house?!
Mom - I didn't kick her out! I told her to get her stuff and get out!
Me - She's standing on the sidewalk in the freezing cold! What do you think kicking her out means?!
Mom - SHE DOESN'T WANT TO LIVE WITH ME!
Me - SO YOU KICKED HER OUT OF YOUR HOUSE?!
*Slams her door and locks it*
Mom yelling through glass - Leave me the fuck alone!
On the way home she texted me "You started the whole thing. ..stay away from me prick" and is now blocking my messages. So I took my sister to her psychologist appointment and tried to calm her down, and I talked with the psych for a bit too to calm myself down. I just can't believe she ripped her out of our home, and then kicked her out of her own house in the freezing cold. This. Is. Absurd. The good news is that the psych even realized that my mom is very very sick, and agrees that my sister should stay with us. Since this post is already long enough, I'll try to cut the rest short. I took her home, my grandmother came over with her boyfriend with lasagna, and we had the first real family dinner since Thanksgiving. Dad's new lawyer is filing an emergency custody order, and my mom blocked all three of our phone numbers so unless the police call us tomorrow with a time of her arrival to grab the rest of her shit, her coming to pick up stuff tomorrow isn't happening. If she just shows up we're calling the police ourselves, because she is dangerous and we're tired of fucking around.
I poured a glass of honey whiskey and now I'm ready to shut down for the day, because today was straight garbage.
Donovan PuppyfuckerA dagger in the dark isworth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered Userregular
Man I am so sorry that this is happening to your whole family. I feel terrible for you, your sister, and your Dad, but honestly I also feel bad for your Mum. She needs help and it doesn't seem like she's getting it. It in no way excuses her behaviour (especially towards your sister), but she is in a real bad place.
I hope your Dad's surgery recovery is quick and simple!
I had a hard time sleeping last night because I was worried about my father's surgery this morning. So I ended up getting 3 or 4 hours of sleep before waking up today at 5:45am and driving my dad to the hospital for his hernia operation. I dropped him off and he was able to go in and get taken care of without me being there, so I drove home and tried to get more rest. I had laid down for an hour but couldn't really fall asleep. That's when my mom started texting me. Here's a direct transcript:
Mom - Can you please be kind enough to let me know about your father?
Me - Yep. Sure.
Mom - Thank You.
Mom - The cable, etc is in my name. I am having it switched to my address, so I will need ALL the Verizon equipment packed up when I come on Saturday. Dad will have to get his own.
Me - Well you can talk to him about that. I think it would be easier to just call in and switch names on the current account.
Mom - Nope. ..already done.
Mom - Sorry
Me - Alright, whatever. Look, I'm here to help. But please do not try to take advantage of him being in surgery, like you try to leverage your daughter instead of thinking of her best interests.
Me - I'll pack up everything for Saturday.
Mom - You wanted it to be settled. He isn't being fair to me AT ALL....at least I am letting Cassandra come!
Mom - The judge didn't want to let her....
Me - That sounds exactly opposite of what I was told.
Me - I'm not arguing over text. I'll pack whatever I need to for Saturday.
Mom - I am not....bullshit. ...but you're a big boy...I took what was MINE
Mom - I am trying to keep her out of it. ...he wants to take her. Ask her what SHE WANTS
Me - You can justify it all you want, but don't lie to my face and then ask me for help, okay? She wanted to stay here and still does.
Mom - Nevermind, just please have everything ready. Remember, I am your mother. It's your problem if you can't deal
Mom - NOPE. ...SHE TOLD DAD
Mom - Whatever, I don't need to answer to you
Me - It's my problem? I can't deal with a lunatic who can't sit down and reason things like an adult and would rather go through the legal system at the expense of your daughters well being.
Me - Fine. I'll pack up the verizon stuff and tell you how dad does.
Mom - Thank you
Mom - Hahaha. ...brainwashed
Me - Yeah, your father, the martyr. ...did you know that he is,putting wiccan spells on me? N has [exploitive deleted for unwarranted personal stuff]
Mom - But I'm a lunatic. ...SMFH
Me - Let's just say you make it easy to be on the other side.
Me - I don't have any idea about that because it's none of my business. But the well being of my sister is totally my business.
Mom - You can CHOOSE , I can't stop you. Just remember WHO WAS,THERE FOR YOU
Mom - Who took a $10/hr pay cut to be at home and take care of EVERYTHING
Mom - Again, I don't answer to you
Me - You're right. You don't.
Mom - You don't want to remember anything, or even talk about it with me, but you do with your father?
Me - Like you'd even listen to me. I really wasn't in the mood for a text war either.
Mom - SMFH....EVEN YOUR FRIENDS WILL SAY IT!
So this was around 8:50 to 9:15am. Afterwards I couldn't get it out of my head. First off, I admit I might have been a little harsh, but I really was holding back instead of just blowing up completely on her. But when she threatened to take the Verizon service, when she already has internet and TV at her house, just because she can, I flipped. Even after I offered a better solution that would have been easier for both parties, just to get told "No, sorry. Pack my shit." Second, I think the fact that she opened with generally being concerned about my father's health before trying to push me around to packing up her things for her really got to me. Next she went on to completely state the opposite that my father said had happened during the hearing, which just riled me up more. I even have the text from my sister from the following Saturday after she was taken that she wanted to live with us instead of my mom. I think just being in the new situation with my mom after a couple days was enough to realize the mood swings and constant yelling would never stop. Then... uh... "wiccan spells"? Are you serious? I legit scoffed at that one, like wh...what? Finally, to end the whole thing with my friends will believe her over me. Even if it were true, why the hell would I give a shit? Even if they did, then they're not my friends. Anyone with eyes can see that I'm just a nice guy trying to take care of his sister and wants zero personal gain. Period. Ugh, I was so frustrated with this it was incredible. So I laid down again and tossed and turned for two more hours until it was time to go get my dad.
My dad was done and ready to leave the hospital around 11am, so when I went over and helped him get dressed and escorted him to my car, where we drove to the pharmacy to pick up gauze, medical tape, and prescribed pain meds from the hospital. Now it's around noon and I texted my mom about my dad because I said I would.
Me - Dad's okay. A little sore but he's fine. What time are you getting your stuff tomorrow?
Mom - That's up to dad....pick a time
Mom - Also, please let him know that my dad will be here from February 27th-March 7th. I don't think that your sister will want to stay with Pop, but that's up to her n dad
Mom - N I don't need stress and high school drama either
Me - We'll let you know. We gotta talk about it and he just got home and is resting.
Mom - No problem, thank you
So yeah she wants no stress or drama? Right... Anyways, moving along. My dad is home resting so I started doing some chores to help out around the house. I did my laundry, washed the dishes, cleaned out my cats litter box, and even attempted to give my cats a bath. Side note, giving cats baths is really difficult. I have scratches like crazy, but at least my kitties are clean and smell really nice! It's around 3pm now, so I took a shower and changed into some pajamas so I could relax, because I was just exhausted at this point. Well when I got out of the shower and changed, my sister had called me. Crying again.
She only said to come get her from mom's house. She didn't say why, she just said to hurry up. So I texted my mom to see what the hell is going on.
Me - Hey, what's the deal?
Mom - She wants to live there come and get her NOW
Mom - N she has an appointment at 5 with her psychologist
Me - I got it, on the way
Mom - Thanks for starting all the shit.
Me - Of course...
So I head over there immediately. My sister calls me while I'm on the way, still crying her eyes out. My mother had told my sister to pack her shit, and kicked her out of her fucking house. Like literally went through her room, through her stuff into garbage bags and slammed the door on her in 16 degree F weather. She's ELEVEN YEARS OLD! How can you be such a cruel person to your own fucking child!? You're mad she's not doing what you want, so you kick her out of your house in freezing conditions. This blows, my fucking mind. I'm so furious that I speed over there as quick as I can, but it's now like 4pm on a Friday so there's tons of traffic. I finally get there, and my sister is standing there on the sidewalk with two ripped up trash bags full of clothes and her book bag. Probably the saddest thing I think I've had to see so far. Thank god she was bundled up in clothes because it was freezing outside today. I told her to pack her stuff into the car and wait there, and walk up to my mom's house and pummel on the door. My mom takes her sweet time coming to the door, screaming her head off, with her arms held out...
Mom - WHAT?!
Me - What's your deal?!
Mom - What?! She doesn't want to live with me!
Me - So you kick her out of your house?!
Mom - I didn't kick her out! I told her to get her stuff and get out!
Me - She's standing on the sidewalk in the freezing cold! What do you think kicking her out means?!
Mom - SHE DOESN'T WANT TO LIVE WITH ME!
Me - SO YOU KICKED HER OUT OF YOUR HOUSE?!
*Slams her door and locks it*
Mom yelling through glass - Leave me the fuck alone!
On the way home she texted me "You started the whole thing. ..stay away from me prick" and is now blocking my messages. So I took my sister to her psychologist appointment and tried to calm her down, and I talked with the psych for a bit too to calm myself down. I just can't believe she ripped her out of our home, and then kicked her out of her own house in the freezing cold. This. Is. Absurd. The good news is that the psych even realized that my mom is very very sick, and agrees that my sister should stay with us. Since this post is already long enough, I'll try to cut the rest short. I took her home, my grandmother came over with her boyfriend with lasagna, and we had the first real family dinner since Thanksgiving. Dad's new lawyer is filing an emergency custody order, and my mom blocked all three of our phone numbers so unless the police call us tomorrow with a time of her arrival to grab the rest of her shit, her coming to pick up stuff tomorrow isn't happening. If she just shows up we're calling the police ourselves, because she is dangerous and we're tired of fucking around.
I poured a glass of honey whiskey and now I'm ready to shut down for the day, because today was straight garbage.
Kicking an eleven year old out of the house in normal weather is suspect. In freezing weather it would be abuse I suspect, but we don't get that situation here really. It is either more or less extreme. Calling CPS might also help bolster your case and protect your sister from the next mood swing. Check with your dad first out of courtesy, but if you feel she is still in harm's way call one way or the other. Your dad won't suffer, your sister will be a little more stressed briefly, and she will be more likely to be kept safe permanently. It is more a preventative step, but more precautions never hurts. It might not even be a case honestly because of how awesome you are, but it would create a record of the behavior for future incidents.
Gnizmo on
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KoopahTroopahThe koopas, the troopas.Philadelphia, PARegistered Userregular
I was just having this dream. I can't really remember the specifics but I was hanging out at a bar near my school with some friends. We were having a good time and drinking some beers when I heard a door knock and a door bell, and I woke up. Now awake, I sat up on my couch and waited a minute trying to figure out if I had heard the knock/bell in my dream or if that was what woke me up. Well then the door bell rang again.
The last officer who was here when my sister was taken was at the door explaining that my mom was here now to get her things. So my dad retreated to his room and locked the door and my sister came down here to the basement, I started disconnecting Verizon stuff, and the officer escorted my mom (who showed up by herself?) in and up to her room. As she was going upstairs she asked if I collected the Verizon stuff, and I said I'm hurrying to do that now. We had 5 rooms connected with different boxes and a router. So I'm scurrying around to collect everything as fast as I could. While I'm doing this she's mouthing off at the officer. He kept saying that he's just there to keep violence from happening, not to move stuff, and he'll end this trip right then if there's profanity tossed around anymore. Etc. I disconnect all the cable boxes and the router from the whole house and pack everything into a big Amazon box. I pack my HD cable box and pack that into its own separate box since we still had that. I grab her new cable box which just showed up in the mail for some reason. I go up to her room and tell the officer I think that's all of it. I offer to carry anything outside for her and I did, I grabbed all the cable stuff and packed her Blazer. She was mouthing off at the officer again cause he couldn't carry anything, even though it's not his job. Then I grabbed her mail that we have been saving for her and gave it to her. She packed whatever other small things she could, said thanks for the mail and drove off. Most pleasant experience yet. After she left the officer explained to my dad that she said she wanted furniture and stuff out of the garage, but she's going to have to call counsel and a mover for that. The police aren't a moving company.
All in all not a bad experience. I expected much worse. My sister is still here, we don't have TV or internet for a couple days because we didn't order new service until yesterday, and mom's out of the house and barred contact til May.
How does your grandfather feel about your mom's condition? It sounds like she needs some kind of emergency intervention.
You need to be able to show immediate risk of harm to self or others for what you are thinking. The good news is that typically any blood relative can file for forced hospitalization with some local authority. I can't think of a state that doesn't allow the adult children to file for it. It is the coroner here, but I don't know how other states work.
It sucks, but sometimes it takes a massive event like your sister being shoved out in the cold to get things moving and fixed. I'm just glad your sister is where she needs to be and safe. Hopefully this lull between court appearances will be enough to give you all a chance to reestablish some normalcy again and your dad a chance to recover from surgery.
Do keep an eye on communications between your mother and sister if your sister is ok with that - the last thing you need is your mother causing more drama and stress for her.
Yep. I got everything. My dad has everything she sent him too. I'll ask my sister before saving her texts.
If it were me, I'd not respond to a text unless it were something that needs a response. "I need the verizon stuff packed up" would be "okay, it will be ready for you to pick up on (X)".
You might also want to double check that she actually transferred it.
Everything else, ignore it. She'll probably keep talking regardless, but you'll feel better, and, better yet, she may stop doing it if people stop giving her attention. Nothing good comes from responding to shit like "he put a wiccan spell on me".
not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
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KoopahTroopahThe koopas, the troopas.Philadelphia, PARegistered Userregular
My popop is pretty old and suffers from Alzheimer's himself. I dont think he's in the right to call anyone into crisis.
I think I'm going to block communication from my sisters phone to my mom. Yesterday she mentioned that mom was already guilt tripping her and sending her nasty texts. Then again the more written evidence to put in front of a judge to show that she doesn't need custody the better. I dunno. I think I care more about my sisters feelings at this point. The messages we have, along with the latest incident, my sisters statement of what happened, and hopefully a recommendation from the psychologist supervisor should be enough. I'll ask her if mom's still harassing her when she gets home from school.
Yep. I got everything. My dad has everything she sent him too. I'll ask my sister before saving her texts.
If it were me, I'd not respond to a text unless it were something that needs a response. "I need the verizon stuff packed up" would be "okay, it will be ready for you to pick up on (X)".
You might also want to double check that she actually transferred it.
Everything else, ignore it. She'll probably keep talking regardless, but you'll feel better, and, better yet, she may stop doing it if people stop giving her attention. Nothing good comes from responding to shit like "he put a wiccan spell on me".
And yeah. Shes already blocked me so I can't respond even if she did text me. We called Verizon a couple hours after I picked up my dad from surgery. My mom's account service is getting discontinued and we're getting new service in my dad's name sometime this week.
I'm just glad I had portal 2 already installed so my sister and I can still co-op in offline steam.
Yeah you have a lot of proof already. She'll keep talking probably even though you're ignoring here, which furthers your point. I would definitely block your mother on your sisters phone at the least.
not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
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ceresWhen the last moon is cast over the last star of morningAnd the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderatormod
God this thread makes me so glad I've been getting treatment. I can't imagine ever doing stuff like this to my kid.
And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
I have a family member who was married to a person with Huntington's disease. As the disease progresses a person's mental stability becomes worse and worse. So the thing that we discovered--as a family during that process-- was that our loved one had to get out as quickly as possible. So yes, the spouse definitely needs medical and psychiatric help especially since the disease is ultimately fatal, but it has to be up to other people to make sure that the spouse got help.
It seems to me you're doing the right thing, and in fact no longer communicating via text (but recording everything) is the best way to make sure this gets finished up as quickly as possible so you can get your affairs as far away from your mother as possible.
"Simple, real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time." -Mustrum Ridcully in Terry Pratchett's Hogfather p. 142 (HarperPrism 1996)
My popop is pretty old and suffers from Alzheimer's himself. I dont think he's in the right to call anyone into crisis.
I think I'm going to block communication from my sisters phone to my mom. Yesterday she mentioned that mom was already guilt tripping her and sending her nasty texts. Then again the more written evidence to put in front of a judge to show that she doesn't need custody the better. I dunno. I think I care more about my sisters feelings at this point. The messages we have, along with the latest incident, my sisters statement of what happened, and hopefully a recommendation from the psychologist supervisor should be enough. I'll ask her if mom's still harassing her when she gets home from school.
I would run that blocking thing by your lawyer. I would be leery of blocking communications between a minor and their legal guardian during a custody dispute. That could be spun poorly for you.
Though I hope your lawyer is fine with it because it sounds like that's horrible for your sister.
My popop is pretty old and suffers from Alzheimer's himself. I dont think he's in the right to call anyone into crisis.
I think I'm going to block communication from my sisters phone to my mom. Yesterday she mentioned that mom was already guilt tripping her and sending her nasty texts. Then again the more written evidence to put in front of a judge to show that she doesn't need custody the better. I dunno. I think I care more about my sisters feelings at this point. The messages we have, along with the latest incident, my sisters statement of what happened, and hopefully a recommendation from the psychologist supervisor should be enough. I'll ask her if mom's still harassing her when she gets home from school.
I would run that blocking thing by your lawyer. I would be leery of blocking communications between a minor and their legal guardian during a custody dispute. That could be spun poorly for you.
Though I hope your lawyer is fine with it because it sounds like that's horrible for your sister.
i thnk you would be better off just changing the name to don't pick up or ignore rather than outright block for the reasons provided. that way she can ignore it, but you still would have her being able to contact her and also to provide more evidence
Have talks with your sister where you tell her that your mom feeling sad and being mean is not your sisters fault. She is still pretty young and even reprimands from a sane person can seem arbitrary to children so they just assume everything they do might potentially be wrong and ruin all the things making everything their fault. Tell her the problem is inside your mothers head, no what you, your father, your sister or anyone else is doing. Your sister is a person, not a teddy-bear, and it would not be right for her to endure abuse just so your mother can feel justified and wanted.
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KoopahTroopahThe koopas, the troopas.Philadelphia, PARegistered Userregular
Yeah, we've reassured her at every avenue that this is never her fault, just that my mom is very sick. I'm sure even my mom feels shitty about the things she does afterwards, but she certainly doesn't tell us that. The least she could do is apologize to all of us, and usually she doesn't. However, I engaged my sister about maybe blocking Mom from texting her because if all she's going to do is send nasty messages to her, it's really just not worth the anxiety. And she said no, because my mom had recently sent an apology to my sister for treating her the way she did. So I said okay, but if she goes back to sending you hate messages, you save them and tell me.
Unfortunately until my dad and I asked her about saving her text messages today, she had been deleting all of them after the conversation was over. So she didn't save any of the other messages on her phone, but she will from now on.
I can see why she'd delete the texts- the way most phones work today conversations are at least partially visible when you check your messages. Like, you see the names of the most recently contacted people along with the first bit of the last text from that conversation. So every time your sister checks her messages, she'd see the nasty conversation with her mom and feel upset.
To get around this, without resorting to taking screen shots of every single message your mom sends, you and your dad should just plug up your sister's phones with conversations so she doesn't have to see your mom's.
In other words, after your mom contacts your sister, you should text your sister. Your dad should text your sister. You should text your dad and your sister as a multi-party text. Have your other relatives text your sister, even if it's just blank messages. That way your mom's conversation will be pushed down so your sister doesn't have to look at it.
KoopahTroopahThe koopas, the troopas.Philadelphia, PARegistered Userregular
Lawyer visit today. Officially retained and signed for. Going to physically file custody stuff next week and things will really start taking off. Lawyer made it sound like once shit hits the fan she's going to be pissed, but that's how divorces go. We have to keep a heavy eye on my sister for the next 10 days, because according to him my mom can swoop in and take my sister from school whenever she wants until the custody complaint gets filed. There are measures we can take from there if she does, but that's a little worrying. My dad is gonna have a conversation with my sister about speaking and seeing my mom until legal stuff officially goes through. Progress being made, no issues so far.
Oh and no word from Verizon yet unfortunately. Steam withdrawal is at an all time high. :bigfrown:
You might want to have the lawyer talk to your sister and give her the proper wording to use with school officials.
Your sister doesn't have to leave with your mother if she feels unsafe, or, doesn't want to go. Might be a useful time to let her know that she's a person and her wants and desires are just as important as everyone else's so if she doesn't want to go with her mother, she doesn't need to.
It's sort of a touchy area in general with custody if the child refuses to go with a parent, so the lawyer would be the best one to talk to about that situation. I'm also reluctant to bring up the kind of stuff that desperate and crazy people will do, too, because I don't want to paint with a broad brush, but... I just have this nagging suspicion for some reason so I apologize if it seems crass.
not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
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KoopahTroopahThe koopas, the troopas.Philadelphia, PARegistered Userregular
Yeah I hadn't thought to go that angle. I think we're going to talk with my sister first before we take extra measures like having the school get involved. I'll be sure to let her know that she doesn't have to go with my mom if she randomly shows up to pick her up instead of us.
You might want to have the lawyer talk to your sister and give her the proper wording to use with school officials.
Your sister doesn't have to leave with your mother if she feels unsafe, or, doesn't want to go. Might be a useful time to let her know that she's a person and her wants and desires are just as important as everyone else's so if she doesn't want to go with her mother, she doesn't need to.
It's sort of a touchy area in general with custody if the child refuses to go with a parent, so the lawyer would be the best one to talk to about that situation. I'm also reluctant to bring up the kind of stuff that desperate and crazy people will do, too, because I don't want to paint with a broad brush, but... I just have this nagging suspicion for some reason so I apologize if it seems crass.
Depending on the state I think school officials are still obligated to protect the child if they feel a parent is behaving erratically or is putting the childs welfare at risk. The lawyer should be able to draft a letter to give to the principal/teacher of the school with the proper legal language that says, "If someone attempts to remove my child from school, I would like to be notified immediately". Also, depending on where you're at, you can't just show up and pull your kid from school because you want to. There normally has to be some reason. If the school were to call and tell your dad that your mom took her from the school because of a death in the family or something, you'd know something was up and you'd have a record of it.
Actually, on the topic of school it might not be a bad idea for your dad to give them a heads up on the whole divorce thing and impending custody issue. Not only for your sister's safety but because if they have a counselor of some type on staff it might be alright for her to talk to somebody that's just flat out neutral. Though I now remember you said she sees a therapist so that role is probably covered.
Actually, on the topic of school it might not be a bad idea for your dad to give them a heads up on the whole divorce thing and impending custody issue. Not only for your sister's safety but because if they have a counselor of some type on staff it might be alright for her to talk to somebody that's just flat out neutral. Though I now remember you said she sees a therapist so that role is probably covered.
I have to agree with Devoutly. Leaving the school out of the loop could be a recipe for disaster. One staff member not aware of the circumstances and your mother could manage to take your sister even if she put up a fuss. Better to have the bases covered so everyone is safe.
KoopahTroopahThe koopas, the troopas.Philadelphia, PARegistered Userregular
edited February 2015
Hmm. I'll run it by my dad.
We just cooked up a fire in our fireplace and all of us are reading various stuff in the living room while the cats are playing with each other.
Before my sister came down to join us she handed me her phone and asked me how to block someone. When I asked if there was something wrong she mentioned that my mom was guilt tripping her again. My dad just had a conversation with her about not seeing mom for a little bit while the documents get officially filed, so I dunno if she mentioned it to mom or if she's just tired of hearing her crap. So I set it up for her. My moms calls will automatically go to her voicemail and her texts will go to her spam messages until she turns off the filters. I taught her how to do it so she can turn them off herself when she's ready.
I think she deserves a break from madness for a bit.
kaliyamaLeft to find less-moderated foraRegistered Userregular
edited February 2015
I don't know what your mom's issue is, but her behaviors generally remind me of borderline - it could be bpd, it could be bipolar or something else - remote diagnosis is impossible - but you guys might find this helpful reading and you could see if it fits http://www.amazon.com/Hate-You-Dont-Leave-Understanding-Personality/dp/0399536213
Well, I'll just reiterate what I said earlier. You guys are the victims of your mom's erratic behavior, so while she probably should get psychiatric help, you guys can't be the ones to get it for her. You'll just be victimized again. In the case of my family, the spouse-in-law eventually moved in with parents who, though reluctant, realized that my sibling's family (both the parent and adult children) could not be involved anymore because they were the victims.
EDIT: It was at my sibling's insistence that the spouse get tested for Huntington's disease because we knew it was hereditary and the spouse's father had it too. Once the testing came back positive things only continued to go downhill over the course of a few months which led to the divorce. The spouse's father likewise had gone through a nasty divorce when his disease started getting worse. I'd say it's probably too late for you guys to insist on anything. So sorry, but I hope you can begin the healing soon.
DisruptedCapitalist on
"Simple, real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time." -Mustrum Ridcully in Terry Pratchett's Hogfather p. 142 (HarperPrism 1996)
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KoopahTroopahThe koopas, the troopas.Philadelphia, PARegistered Userregular
edited February 2015
Not a lot to update on. Things are going smoothly with my sister here at home and my mom out of the house. Though I feel like my sister is getting more personal with my dad with her questions. My mom said a lot of awful things to her which I think in turn is making her question some of those things, just to convince herself that they weren't true. For example, we'll be sitting there having a regular conversation and she'll just straight out ask something like, "Did you guys want me when mom was pregnant?". Ya know, and we tell her how we felt about it when we found out, and how much we love her, etc... It worries me a little that she's thinking about these things, but I know she's fine. In any case, she seems normal. She draws a lot, watches Markiplier, plays wii and 3ds. She's serious about being an artist which makes me super happy, I know I wish I drew more as a kid and realized where I wanted to go before I graduated high school.
To go over a couple things that were recommended here: I went over talking to the school with my dad, but he believes that since my mom is my sisters legal mother and there aren't any legal custody orders yet that she has the right to come and grab my sister out of school. In short, he doesn't think we should try to get the school involved, nor does he think that my mom will actually go to her school without asking/telling her. We also got my sister a new phone on our contract, since she used to be on my moms contract. So we're sending her old phone back to my mom because it's technically in her name. She hasn't given my mom her new number yet, but she understands that it's completely up to her if she wants to talk to my mom or not.
We just cooked up a fire in our fireplace and all of us are reading various stuff in the living room while the cats are playing with each other.
Before my sister came down to join us she handed me her phone and asked me how to block someone. When I asked if there was something wrong she mentioned that my mom was guilt tripping her again. My dad just had a conversation with her about not seeing mom for a little bit while the documents get officially filed, so I dunno if she mentioned it to mom or if she's just tired of hearing her crap. So I set it up for her. My moms calls will automatically go to her voicemail and her texts will go to her spam messages until she turns off the filters. I taught her how to do it so she can turn them off herself when she's ready.
I think she deserves a break from madness for a bit.
Not to divert too much, but is that the Loot Crate one? if so, high five fellow crater!
We just cooked up a fire in our fireplace and all of us are reading various stuff in the living room while the cats are playing with each other.
Before my sister came down to join us she handed me her phone and asked me how to block someone. When I asked if there was something wrong she mentioned that my mom was guilt tripping her again. My dad just had a conversation with her about not seeing mom for a little bit while the documents get officially filed, so I dunno if she mentioned it to mom or if she's just tired of hearing her crap. So I set it up for her. My moms calls will automatically go to her voicemail and her texts will go to her spam messages until she turns off the filters. I taught her how to do it so she can turn them off herself when she's ready.
I think she deserves a break from madness for a bit.
Not to divert too much, but is that the Loot Crate one? if so, high five fellow crater!
Yeah it is! I was so excited cause I had no idea what the theme of this month's crate was and I wanted to buy the book anyway.
Koop, actually, parents/guardians don't get a carte blanche for taking kids out of school. If your sister says she doesn't want to go with her mother, the school needs to acknowledge and respect that. That's the largest takeaway from it. It's not that you're preventing her from doing so, but just that if your sister is uncomfortable, they need to be aware and not force her to go.
not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
To go over a couple things that were recommended here: I went over talking to the school with my dad, but he believes that since my mom is my sisters legal mother and there aren't any legal custody orders yet that she has the right to come and grab my sister out of school. In short, he doesn't think we should try to get the school involved, nor does he think that my mom will actually go to her school without asking/telling her. We also got my sister a new phone on our contract, since she used to be on my moms contract. So we're sending her old phone back to my mom because it's technically in her name. She hasn't given my mom her new number yet, but she understands that it's completely up to her if she wants to talk to my mom or not.
Two things:
1) Google Voice number for your sister. This way the number she gives Mom is easily replaceable and can be sent straight to voicemail or other options. It'll even transcript it to text (poorly) so you don't have to listen to crazy or just scan it for crazy ahead of time. If she isn't being crazy it will just ring through to her real phone just like a normal number. No reason Mom even has to know you've given your sister some emotional safety gear.
2) Part of the school thing was to let them know that this major emotional event is happening in your sister's life. They have her for a major chunk of each day and a lot of kids act differently at home and at school. They can appreciate being given a warning and an having an understanding of any changes. I can see it being a bit of a privacy thing for your sister though.
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I will be out that way in June to visit my family (I'm from that area), and I'll totally buy you a drink.
I mostly had wanted to know if you were close enough to my family that maybe they could help, but it sounds like you guys have everything under control.
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
I had a hard time sleeping last night because I was worried about my father's surgery this morning. So I ended up getting 3 or 4 hours of sleep before waking up today at 5:45am and driving my dad to the hospital for his hernia operation. I dropped him off and he was able to go in and get taken care of without me being there, so I drove home and tried to get more rest. I had laid down for an hour but couldn't really fall asleep. That's when my mom started texting me. Here's a direct transcript:
So this was around 8:50 to 9:15am. Afterwards I couldn't get it out of my head. First off, I admit I might have been a little harsh, but I really was holding back instead of just blowing up completely on her. But when she threatened to take the Verizon service, when she already has internet and TV at her house, just because she can, I flipped. Even after I offered a better solution that would have been easier for both parties, just to get told "No, sorry. Pack my shit." Second, I think the fact that she opened with generally being concerned about my father's health before trying to push me around to packing up her things for her really got to me. Next she went on to completely state the opposite that my father said had happened during the hearing, which just riled me up more. I even have the text from my sister from the following Saturday after she was taken that she wanted to live with us instead of my mom. I think just being in the new situation with my mom after a couple days was enough to realize the mood swings and constant yelling would never stop. Then... uh... "wiccan spells"? Are you serious? I legit scoffed at that one, like wh...what? Finally, to end the whole thing with my friends will believe her over me. Even if it were true, why the hell would I give a shit? Even if they did, then they're not my friends. Anyone with eyes can see that I'm just a nice guy trying to take care of his sister and wants zero personal gain. Period. Ugh, I was so frustrated with this it was incredible. So I laid down again and tossed and turned for two more hours until it was time to go get my dad.
My dad was done and ready to leave the hospital around 11am, so then I went over and helped him get dressed and escorted him to my car, where we drove to the pharmacy to pick up gauze, medical tape, and prescribed pain meds from the hospital. Now it's around noon and I texted my mom about my dad because I said I would.
So yeah she wants no stress or drama? Right... Anyways, moving along. My dad is home resting so I started doing some chores to help out around the house. I did my laundry, washed the dishes, cleaned out my cats litter box, and even attempted to give my cats a bath. Side note, giving cats baths is really difficult. I have scratches like crazy, but at least my kitties are clean and smell really nice! It's around 3pm now, so I took a shower and changed into some pajamas so I could relax, because I was just exhausted at this point. Well when I got out of the shower and changed, my sister had called me. Crying again.
She only said to come get her from mom's house. She didn't say why, she just said to hurry up. So I texted my mom to see what the hell is going on.
So I head over there immediately. My sister calls me while I'm on the way, still crying her eyes out. My mother had told my sister to pack her shit, and kicked her out of her fucking house. Like literally went through her room, threw her stuff at my sister and into garbage bags, pushed her outside and slammed the door on her in 16 degree F weather. She's ELEVEN YEARS OLD! How can you be such a cruel person to your own fucking child!? You're mad she's not doing what you want, so you kick her out of your house in freezing conditions. This blows, my fucking mind. I'm so furious that I speed over there as quick as I can, but it's now like 4pm on a Friday so there's tons of traffic. I finally get there, and my sister is standing there on the sidewalk with two ripped up trash bags full of clothes and her book bag. Probably the saddest thing I think I've had to see so far. Thank god she was bundled up in clothes because it was freezing outside today. I told her to pack her stuff into the car and wait there, and walk up to my mom's house and pummel on the door. My mom takes her sweet time coming to the door, screaming her head off, with her arms held out...
On the way home she texted me "You started the whole thing. ..stay away from me prick" and is now blocking my messages. So I took my sister to her psychologist appointment and tried to calm her down, and I talked with the psych for a bit too to calm myself down. I just can't believe she ripped her out of our home, and then kicked her out of her own house in the freezing cold. This. Is. Absurd. The good news is that the psych even realized that my mom is very very sick, and agrees that my sister should stay with us. Since this post is already long enough, I'll try to cut the rest short. I took her home, my grandmother came over with her boyfriend with lasagna, and we had the first real family dinner since Thanksgiving. Dad's new lawyer is filing an emergency custody order, and my mom blocked all three of our phone numbers so unless the police call us tomorrow with a time of her arrival to grab the rest of her shit, her coming to pick up stuff tomorrow isn't happening. If she just shows up we're calling the police ourselves, because she is dangerous and we're tired of fucking around.
I poured a glass of honey whiskey and now I'm ready to shut down for the day, because today was straight garbage.
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
I hope your Dad's surgery recovery is quick and simple!
Kicking an eleven year old out of the house in normal weather is suspect. In freezing weather it would be abuse I suspect, but we don't get that situation here really. It is either more or less extreme. Calling CPS might also help bolster your case and protect your sister from the next mood swing. Check with your dad first out of courtesy, but if you feel she is still in harm's way call one way or the other. Your dad won't suffer, your sister will be a little more stressed briefly, and she will be more likely to be kept safe permanently. It is more a preventative step, but more precautions never hurts. It might not even be a case honestly because of how awesome you are, but it would create a record of the behavior for future incidents.
The last officer who was here when my sister was taken was at the door explaining that my mom was here now to get her things. So my dad retreated to his room and locked the door and my sister came down here to the basement, I started disconnecting Verizon stuff, and the officer escorted my mom (who showed up by herself?) in and up to her room. As she was going upstairs she asked if I collected the Verizon stuff, and I said I'm hurrying to do that now. We had 5 rooms connected with different boxes and a router. So I'm scurrying around to collect everything as fast as I could. While I'm doing this she's mouthing off at the officer. He kept saying that he's just there to keep violence from happening, not to move stuff, and he'll end this trip right then if there's profanity tossed around anymore. Etc. I disconnect all the cable boxes and the router from the whole house and pack everything into a big Amazon box. I pack my HD cable box and pack that into its own separate box since we still had that. I grab her new cable box which just showed up in the mail for some reason. I go up to her room and tell the officer I think that's all of it. I offer to carry anything outside for her and I did, I grabbed all the cable stuff and packed her Blazer. She was mouthing off at the officer again cause he couldn't carry anything, even though it's not his job. Then I grabbed her mail that we have been saving for her and gave it to her. She packed whatever other small things she could, said thanks for the mail and drove off. Most pleasant experience yet. After she left the officer explained to my dad that she said she wanted furniture and stuff out of the garage, but she's going to have to call counsel and a mover for that. The police aren't a moving company.
All in all not a bad experience. I expected much worse. My sister is still here, we don't have TV or internet for a couple days because we didn't order new service until yesterday, and mom's out of the house and barred contact til May.
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
You need to be able to show immediate risk of harm to self or others for what you are thinking. The good news is that typically any blood relative can file for forced hospitalization with some local authority. I can't think of a state that doesn't allow the adult children to file for it. It is the coroner here, but I don't know how other states work.
Do keep an eye on communications between your mother and sister if your sister is ok with that - the last thing you need is your mother causing more drama and stress for her.
If it were me, I'd not respond to a text unless it were something that needs a response. "I need the verizon stuff packed up" would be "okay, it will be ready for you to pick up on (X)".
You might also want to double check that she actually transferred it.
Everything else, ignore it. She'll probably keep talking regardless, but you'll feel better, and, better yet, she may stop doing it if people stop giving her attention. Nothing good comes from responding to shit like "he put a wiccan spell on me".
I think I'm going to block communication from my sisters phone to my mom. Yesterday she mentioned that mom was already guilt tripping her and sending her nasty texts. Then again the more written evidence to put in front of a judge to show that she doesn't need custody the better. I dunno. I think I care more about my sisters feelings at this point. The messages we have, along with the latest incident, my sisters statement of what happened, and hopefully a recommendation from the psychologist supervisor should be enough. I'll ask her if mom's still harassing her when she gets home from school.
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
And yeah. Shes already blocked me so I can't respond even if she did text me. We called Verizon a couple hours after I picked up my dad from surgery. My mom's account service is getting discontinued and we're getting new service in my dad's name sometime this week.
I'm just glad I had portal 2 already installed so my sister and I can still co-op in offline steam.
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
It seems to me you're doing the right thing, and in fact no longer communicating via text (but recording everything) is the best way to make sure this gets finished up as quickly as possible so you can get your affairs as far away from your mother as possible.
I would run that blocking thing by your lawyer. I would be leery of blocking communications between a minor and their legal guardian during a custody dispute. That could be spun poorly for you.
Though I hope your lawyer is fine with it because it sounds like that's horrible for your sister.
i thnk you would be better off just changing the name to don't pick up or ignore rather than outright block for the reasons provided. that way she can ignore it, but you still would have her being able to contact her and also to provide more evidence
Unfortunately until my dad and I asked her about saving her text messages today, she had been deleting all of them after the conversation was over. So she didn't save any of the other messages on her phone, but she will from now on.
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
To get around this, without resorting to taking screen shots of every single message your mom sends, you and your dad should just plug up your sister's phones with conversations so she doesn't have to see your mom's.
In other words, after your mom contacts your sister, you should text your sister. Your dad should text your sister. You should text your dad and your sister as a multi-party text. Have your other relatives text your sister, even if it's just blank messages. That way your mom's conversation will be pushed down so your sister doesn't have to look at it.
Steam Me
Oh and no word from Verizon yet unfortunately. Steam withdrawal is at an all time high. :bigfrown:
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
Your sister doesn't have to leave with your mother if she feels unsafe, or, doesn't want to go. Might be a useful time to let her know that she's a person and her wants and desires are just as important as everyone else's so if she doesn't want to go with her mother, she doesn't need to.
It's sort of a touchy area in general with custody if the child refuses to go with a parent, so the lawyer would be the best one to talk to about that situation. I'm also reluctant to bring up the kind of stuff that desperate and crazy people will do, too, because I don't want to paint with a broad brush, but... I just have this nagging suspicion for some reason so I apologize if it seems crass.
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
It makes me think she's not to far away from "well if he cast it on me, I'll cast one on him, all I need is some human blood"
Depending on the state I think school officials are still obligated to protect the child if they feel a parent is behaving erratically or is putting the childs welfare at risk. The lawyer should be able to draft a letter to give to the principal/teacher of the school with the proper legal language that says, "If someone attempts to remove my child from school, I would like to be notified immediately". Also, depending on where you're at, you can't just show up and pull your kid from school because you want to. There normally has to be some reason. If the school were to call and tell your dad that your mom took her from the school because of a death in the family or something, you'd know something was up and you'd have a record of it.
I have to agree with Devoutly. Leaving the school out of the loop could be a recipe for disaster. One staff member not aware of the circumstances and your mother could manage to take your sister even if she put up a fuss. Better to have the bases covered so everyone is safe.
We just cooked up a fire in our fireplace and all of us are reading various stuff in the living room while the cats are playing with each other.
Before my sister came down to join us she handed me her phone and asked me how to block someone. When I asked if there was something wrong she mentioned that my mom was guilt tripping her again. My dad just had a conversation with her about not seeing mom for a little bit while the documents get officially filed, so I dunno if she mentioned it to mom or if she's just tired of hearing her crap. So I set it up for her. My moms calls will automatically go to her voicemail and her texts will go to her spam messages until she turns off the filters. I taught her how to do it so she can turn them off herself when she's ready.
I think she deserves a break from madness for a bit.
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
EDIT: It was at my sibling's insistence that the spouse get tested for Huntington's disease because we knew it was hereditary and the spouse's father had it too. Once the testing came back positive things only continued to go downhill over the course of a few months which led to the divorce. The spouse's father likewise had gone through a nasty divorce when his disease started getting worse. I'd say it's probably too late for you guys to insist on anything. So sorry, but I hope you can begin the healing soon.
To go over a couple things that were recommended here: I went over talking to the school with my dad, but he believes that since my mom is my sisters legal mother and there aren't any legal custody orders yet that she has the right to come and grab my sister out of school. In short, he doesn't think we should try to get the school involved, nor does he think that my mom will actually go to her school without asking/telling her. We also got my sister a new phone on our contract, since she used to be on my moms contract. So we're sending her old phone back to my mom because it's technically in her name. She hasn't given my mom her new number yet, but she understands that it's completely up to her if she wants to talk to my mom or not.
Also, Verizon equipment finally showed up today.
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
Not to divert too much, but is that the Loot Crate one? if so, high five fellow crater!
Yeah it is! I was so excited cause I had no idea what the theme of this month's crate was and I wanted to buy the book anyway.
Twitch: KoopahTroopah - Steam: Koopah
Two things:
1) Google Voice number for your sister. This way the number she gives Mom is easily replaceable and can be sent straight to voicemail or other options. It'll even transcript it to text (poorly) so you don't have to listen to crazy or just scan it for crazy ahead of time. If she isn't being crazy it will just ring through to her real phone just like a normal number. No reason Mom even has to know you've given your sister some emotional safety gear.
2) Part of the school thing was to let them know that this major emotional event is happening in your sister's life. They have her for a major chunk of each day and a lot of kids act differently at home and at school. They can appreciate being given a warning and an having an understanding of any changes. I can see it being a bit of a privacy thing for your sister though.