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Drunk People Have More Fun than [Chat]

KanaKana Registered User regular
edited November 2014 in Debate and/or Discourse
Woman Arrested After Early-Morning Wine and Pie Incident

After drinking a bottle of wine inside a Northgate grocery store early Monday morning, a 48-year-old woman roamed the store eating handfuls of pie before she was arrested by police.

The incident began around 6 AM, when an employee saw the woman drinking a bottle of wine in the store and asked her to leave. Instead, the woman drank the rest of the bottle and walked over to the store’s bakery where she picked up a blueberry pie. The woman then proceeded to eat fistfuls of the pie in the store’s coffee shop before ditching the dessert and walking out of the store.
At around 2:30 this morning, Seattle police got a call about a man rolling down the western side of Capitol Hill in an office chair, and found the man near Lakeview Boulevard and E. Highland Drive.

When officers contacted the man—who was carrying a set of drum sticks, had a hubcap tied to his arm, and was wearing motorcycle goggles and several scarves and purses—he sat down in his chair and told police he was “late for a gig.”

The 29-year-old man initially gave police a fake name and then told officers to handcuff him.

After obliging the man’s request, officers sat the man back down in the chair and rolled him over to the curb. The man then rolled himself back into traffic and fell out of his chair (it happens to the best of us) but was caught by one of the officers.

As police helped the man over to the curb and sat him down again, he spat at an officer. The man missed the officer, but warned his salvo of spittle was simply a “warning” shot.

Officers then searched the man and found he was carrying a 12″ crowbar, and had stuffed a belt buckle and necklace into his gloves.

And finally, for someone about to be served in wine...
Days after moving into the Leschi neighborhood, a man called police and said he was chagrined by fowl noises coming from a nearby home.

When officers arrived at the man’s home near East Alder Street and Erie Avenue around 8:15 Sunday morning they quickly identified the culprit.

“I could plainly hear the suspect rooster crowing,” Officer Elizabeth Consalvi wrote in her report of the incident. “The noise from the rooster was loud, raucous, frequent, continuous and repetitive.”

The rooster, Officer Consalvi wrote, was clearly in violation of Seattle’s noise laws. Futhermore, the cockerel also appeared to be in violation of the city’s stringent chicken restrictions, which—with some rare exceptions—prohibit Seattle residents from owning roosters.

Police contacted rooster’s owner, who told officers that up until last week, he “believed that the suspect chicken was a female.”

The owner then informed officers the bird would not be an issue much longer, as he planned to eat the rooster later that week.

rooster.jpg


There There, bud

A trap is for fish: when you've got the fish, you can forget the trap. A snare is for rabbits: when you've got the rabbit, you can forget the snare. Words are for meaning: when you've got the meaning, you can forget the words.
Kana on
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    ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    Coq au vin.

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    surrealitychecksurrealitycheck lonely, but not unloved dreaming of faulty keys and latchesRegistered User regular
    greetongs

    i am computer

    obF2Wuw.png
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    MazzyxMazzyx Comedy Gold Registered User regular
    I have spent my entire evening muderizing orcs.

    So much mudertunity.

    So little muder time.

    u7stthr17eud.png
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    Shazkar ShadowstormShazkar Shadowstorm Registered User regular
    Ok night ur all butts

    poo
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    CindersCinders Whose sails were black when it was windy Registered User regular
    It's probably going to be a week until I have sex again.

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    descdesc Goretexing to death Registered User regular
    Mazzyx wrote: »
    I have spent my entire evening muderizing orcs.

    So much mudertunity.

    So little muder time.

    Star Wars rebels is good

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    TehSlothTehSloth Hit Or Miss I Guess They Never Miss, HuhRegistered User regular
    ugh, my sinuses are exploding due to allergies, this is the blurst

    FC: 1993-7778-8872 PSN: TehSloth Xbox: SlothTeh
    twitch.tv/tehsloth
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    MazzyxMazzyx Comedy Gold Registered User regular
    desc wrote: »
    Mazzyx wrote: »
    I have spent my entire evening muderizing orcs.

    So much mudertunity.

    So little muder time.

    Star Wars rebels is good

    It is!

    u7stthr17eud.png
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    GreeperGreeper Registered User regular
    murdertunity's really taking off

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    skippydumptruckskippydumptruck begin again Registered User regular
    it took them 3 tries to get the epidural in the first time, then it kinked and stopped working

    so sarah just had to get a needle in the spine again

    @organichu maybe bab wont be today after all

    :l

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    descdesc Goretexing to death Registered User regular
    What is this

    We demand bab

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    skippydumptruckskippydumptruck begin again Registered User regular
    desc wrote: »
    What is this

    We demand bab

    talk to the uterus idk

    shit be cozy

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    syndalissyndalis Getting Classy On the WallRegistered User, Loves Apple Products regular
    I am actually dreading where I am going to go for norwegian stuff once I finish my pimsleur lessons.

    It really looks like there is a total lack of structured self-teaching courses to learn norwegian beyond the absolute basics.

    I think it is going to devolve into me with a dictionary and some TV/movies/books.

    It will be a bunch of me hearing them say they want something or that isn't something or they are going to somewhere.

    I kind of resent people who pick up languages quickly.

    SW-4158-3990-6116
    Let's play Mario Kart or something...
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    JeanJean Heartbroken papa bear Gatineau, QuébecRegistered User regular
    Cinders wrote: »
    It's probably going to be a week until I have sex again.

    at least you get laid once in a while!

    I'm too busy with books and stuff to get anywhere close to that point :)

    "You won't destroy us, You won't destroy our democracy. We are a small but proud nation. No one can bomb us to silence. No one can scare us from being Norway. This evening and tonight, we'll take care of each other. That's what we do best when attacked'' - Jens Stoltenberg
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    skippydumptruckskippydumptruck begin again Registered User regular
    also oh my god you guys the bed in this room

    in austin my bed was a thin ass matress on the window sill

    here it is this janky pull out couch with thick steel bars between each of the three segments

    on of them hits right mid shoulders, the other at my knees

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    Apothe0sisApothe0sis Have you ever questioned the nature of your reality? Registered User regular
    Is babby like ...hiccoughs or whatever?

    Could you go "Hey baby, I just wanted to let you know that I lllooo-BOO!"

    And then the babby shoots out and across the room?

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    spool32spool32 Contrary Library Registered User regular
    syndalis wrote: »
    I am actually dreading where I am going to go for norwegian stuff once I finish my pimsleur lessons.

    It really looks like there is a total lack of structured self-teaching courses to learn norwegian beyond the absolute basics.

    I think it is going to devolve into me with a dictionary and some TV/movies/books.

    It will be a bunch of me hearing them say they want something or that isn't something or they are going to somewhere.

    I kind of resent people who pick up languages quickly.

    rosetta stone?

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    skippydumptruckskippydumptruck begin again Registered User regular
    Apothe0sis wrote: »
    Is babby like ...hiccoughs or whatever?

    Could you go "Hey baby, I just wanted to let you know that I lllooo-BOO!"

    And then the babby shoots out and across the room?

    I'll test this theory and report on the results

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    tapeslingertapeslinger Space Unicorn Slush Ranger Social Justice Rebel ScumRegistered User regular
    that is so weird, I was just talking to a coworker today who had that happen with her first son and I about crawled out of my skin thinking about it

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    Belasco32Belasco32 Registered User regular
    so I made the mistake of reading something sort of icky on the forums, so I am go take break and kill things for a while

    much lub

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    GreeperGreeper Registered User regular
    Belasco32 wrote: »
    so I made the mistake of reading something sort of icky on the forums, so I am go take break and kill things for a while

    much lub

    this is why i only read my own posts

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    MsAnthropyMsAnthropy The Lady of Pain Breaks the Rhythm, Breaks the Rhythm, Breaks the Rhythm The City of FlowersRegistered User regular
    Apothe0sis wrote: »
    Is babby like ...hiccoughs or whatever?

    Could you go "Hey baby, I just wanted to let you know that I lllooo-BOO!"

    And then the babby shoots out and across the room?
    that is so weird, I was just talking to a coworker today who had that happen with her first son and I about crawled out of my skin thinking about it

    Wow, I had no idea the hiccup trick was so prevelant.

    Luscious Sounds Spotify Playlist

    "The only real politics I knew was that if a guy liked Hitler, I’d beat the stuffing out of him and that would be it." -- Jack Kirby
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    spool32spool32 Contrary Library Registered User regular
    skippy I heard that clapping really loudly over her stomach can induce labor

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    surrealitychecksurrealitycheck lonely, but not unloved dreaming of faulty keys and latchesRegistered User regular
    Belasco32 wrote: »
    so I made the mistake of reading something sort of icky on the forums, so I am go take break and kill things for a while

    much lub

    i blame spool

    obF2Wuw.png
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    OnTheLastCastleOnTheLastCastle let's keep it haimish for the peripatetic Registered User regular
    this babb is gonna be the exact opposite of sawyer

    all scowls

    all the time

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    Apothe0sisApothe0sis Have you ever questioned the nature of your reality? Registered User regular
    Put headphones playing Bruno Mars on babby hump.

    It will retreat in self defense.

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    ElendilElendil Registered User regular
    offering money can also induce labor

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    OnTheLastCastleOnTheLastCastle let's keep it haimish for the peripatetic Registered User regular
    except joke on u

    she is the good one

    sawyer is the evil

    epic fight and 3 part movie

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    HappylilElfHappylilElf Registered User regular
    skippy blast the theme song from cowboy bebop on repeat

    maybe bebbe will come with a bitchin' spaceship

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    LeitnerLeitner Registered User regular
    The civil forfeiture thread seems like it could be pretty interesting if it wasn't for the fact that any serious debate would go straight to arguments about the constitution.

    You could make some very compelling arguments about requiring people to have a paper trail for serious amounts of money that would be great at cutting down corruption and people subverting the law, with most serious organised crime leaders and white collar crime to a large extent allowing people to be distant enough from the offence to make any real chance of prosecution and seizure of assets by proving direct links to the offence for the amounts.

    @Ronya Singapore sounds like it has something very similar to stop 'political gifts' and similar.

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    Apothe0sisApothe0sis Have you ever questioned the nature of your reality? Registered User regular
    You know the Dawson's Creek themesong? My best/worst Mondogreen in memory is

    "She had two legs, one was six foot one was three"

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    VariableVariable Mouth Congress Stroke Me Lady FameRegistered User regular
    @casual eddy how did you come to see it and what did you see? I heartily agree.

    BNet-Vari#1998 | Switch-SW 6960 6688 8388 | Steam | Twitch
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    spool32spool32 Contrary Library Registered User regular
    skippy jr is management material

    unbending in the labor dispute

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    VariableVariable Mouth Congress Stroke Me Lady FameRegistered User regular
    @jacobkosh a day late and I hit agree on your post but yes Mulaney has gotten better and yes a huge part of why I know this is that I kept watching because I like the dude, I enjoy his standup but I love him on Kroll so I wanted to like it. also I have a friend that watches loads of tv, both good and bad, so when I heard she was watching Mulaney I made sure we watched that before whatever else was on the dvr, so it was extra easy.

    martin short had a moment in last weeks where I was seriously unable to stop laughing. I can't be certain everyone would even laugh, the people around me didn't, but I about died.

    BNet-Vari#1998 | Switch-SW 6960 6688 8388 | Steam | Twitch
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    tapeslingertapeslinger Space Unicorn Slush Ranger Social Justice Rebel ScumRegistered User regular
    MrAnthropy wrote: »
    Apothe0sis wrote: »
    Is babby like ...hiccoughs or whatever?

    Could you go "Hey baby, I just wanted to let you know that I lllooo-BOO!"

    And then the babby shoots out and across the room?
    that is so weird, I was just talking to a coworker today who had that happen with her first son and I about crawled out of my skin thinking about it

    Wow, I had no idea the hiccup trick was so prevelant.

    yeah, no, I was talking about the "three jabs with the epidural"
    but now I can't shake out the other image so
    *continues cringing*

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    Apothe0sisApothe0sis Have you ever questioned the nature of your reality? Registered User regular
    Explain to the babby that if it doesn't come out right now that you'll let the forums name it.

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    OnTheLastCastleOnTheLastCastle let's keep it haimish for the peripatetic Registered User regular
    Variable wrote: »
    @jacobkosh a day late and I hit agree on your post but yes Mulaney has gotten better and yes a huge part of why I know this is that I kept watching because I like the dude, I enjoy his standup but I love him on Kroll so I wanted to like it. also I have a friend that watches loads of tv, both good and bad, so when I heard she was watching Mulaney I made sure we watched that before whatever else was on the dvr, so it was extra easy.

    martin short had a moment in last weeks where I was seriously unable to stop laughing. I can't be certain everyone would even laugh, the people around me didn't, but I about died.

    i felt like mulaney was a parody of a sitcom that was intentionally the worst sitcom in existence

    i guess i could try it again............

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    Donkey KongDonkey Kong Putting Nintendo out of business with AI nips Registered User regular
    also oh my god you guys the bed in this room

    in austin my bed was a thin ass matress on the window sill

    here it is this janky pull out couch with thick steel bars between each of the three segments

    on of them hits right mid shoulders, the other at my knees

    I have described a night on one of these as "about as restful as falling asleep doubled over the top of chainlink fence"

    Thousands of hot, local singles are waiting to play at bubbulon.com.
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    VariableVariable Mouth Congress Stroke Me Lady FameRegistered User regular
    did you watch more than 2?

    I'll give to 2 being bad. I have sincerely loved the last 3, since the halloween ep.

    I may just have terrible taste and a soft spot for certain comedians

    BNet-Vari#1998 | Switch-SW 6960 6688 8388 | Steam | Twitch
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    VanguardVanguard But now the dream is over. And the insect is awake.Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    Apothe0sis wrote: »
    Explain to the babby that if it doesn't come out right now that you'll let the forums name it.

    let's get warmed up and get a few names going

    i'll start

    dharma

This discussion has been closed.