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If I had one wish that I could wish this holiday season,

The GeekThe Geek Oh-Two Crew, OmeganautRegistered User, ClubPA regular
it would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace.

If I had two wishes that I could wish for this holiday season, the first would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of harmony and peace.. and the second would be for $30 million a month to be given to me, tax-free in a Swiss bank account.

You know, if I had three wishes that I could make this holiday season, first, of course, would be for all the children to get together and sing, the second would be for the $30 million every month to me, and the third would be for all encompassing power over every living being thing in the entire universe.

And if I had four wishes that I could make this holiday season, first would be the crap about the kids, second would be for the $30 million, the third would be for all the power, and the fourth would be to set aside one month each year for an extended 31-day orgasm, to be brought about slowly by Rosanna Arquette and that model Paulina somebody, I can't think of her name, of course my lovely wife could come, too. She's behind me 100% on this, I guarantee you.

Wait a minute, maybe that sex thing should be the first wish! So, if I made that the first wish, because, you know, it could all go boom tomorrow, and then what have you got? No, no, the kids singing would be great, that would be nice. No, no, who am I kidding! I mean, they're not gonna be able to get all those kids together! I mean, the logistics of the thing is impossible! It's more trouble than it's worth! So, we reorganize: here we go. First, the sex - we go with that; second, the money. No! We go with the power second, then the money, and then the kids. Oh, wait, oh geez! I forgot about revenge against my enemies! Okay, revenge against all my enemies, they should die like pigs in Hell! That would be the fourth wish! And of course, my fifth wish would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of peace and harmony.

Thank you, everybody.

BLM - ACAB
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Posts

  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    I wish that for you The Geek

  • JebusUDJebusUD Adventure! Candy IslandRegistered User regular
    and I wonder about my neighbors even though I don't have them
    but they're listening to every word I say
  • Mysterious FoxMysterious Fox Registered User regular
    I would wish for wings that work.

  • JebusUDJebusUD Adventure! Candy IslandRegistered User regular
    ...and then their boss said, I wish they were back before noon!

    and I wonder about my neighbors even though I don't have them
    but they're listening to every word I say
  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    I'm going to wish for infinite wishes. Then I'm going to infinite wish for infinite wishes.

    Miss me? Find me on:

    Twitch (I stream most days of the week)
    Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
  • MarathonMarathon Registered User regular
    Sounds like Steve Martin in here

  • TamTam Registered User regular
    the discovery of a cheap method of fusion

  • RT800RT800 Registered User regular
    I would wish for the best ham sandwich.

    No!

    Two ham sandwiches.

  • Virgil_Leads_YouVirgil_Leads_You Proud Father House GardenerRegistered User regular
    Restored Teeth

    VayBJ4e.png
  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    MORE WISHES

  • UnbrokenEvaUnbrokenEva HIGH ON THE WIRE BUT I WON'T TRIP ITRegistered User regular
    Well, for starters I would wish to be a little bit taller

  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    Would you also, pray tell, wish to be a baller?

  • EndEnd Registered User regular
    RT800 wrote: »
    I would wish for the best ham sandwich.

    No!

    Two ham sandwiches.

    but only one of them is best

    I wish that someway, somehow, that I could save every one of us
    zaleiria-by-lexxy-sig.jpg
  • UnbrokenEvaUnbrokenEva HIGH ON THE WIRE BUT I WON'T TRIP ITRegistered User regular
    Would you also, pray tell, wish to be a baller?

    Well, I don't want to be greedy, but yeah. That would be pretty great.

  • GoatmonGoatmon Companion of Kess Registered User regular
    A pancreas that fucking works.

    Switch Friend Code: SW-6680-6709-4204


  • SagatSatanSagatSatan Segat Satan!Registered User regular
    edited December 2014
    -

    SagatSatan on
  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
  • GoatmonGoatmon Companion of Kess Registered User regular
    Fearghaill wrote: »
    Well, for starters I would wish to be a little bit taller

    How tall are you?

    Switch Friend Code: SW-6680-6709-4204


  • AirAir Registered User regular
    I would look deep into my girlfriends eyes and tell her my wish already came true


    And that a ps4 would be alright

    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
  • ButtcleftButtcleft Registered User regular
    I wish I was capable of trusting another human being.

  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    Buttcleft wrote: »
    I wish I was capable of trusting another human being.

    fall back into my arms buttcleft

    I will catch you.

  • knitdanknitdan Registered User regular
    I wish people would stop being downers for the holidays.

    “I was quick when I came in here, I’m twice as quick now”
    -Indiana Solo, runner of blades
  • AirAir Registered User regular
    Haha catch him but then drop him right after
    That brief glimmer of hope makes it funnier

    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
  • UsagiUsagi Nah Registered User regular
    I would wish for a do over

  • UnbrokenEvaUnbrokenEva HIGH ON THE WIRE BUT I WON'T TRIP ITRegistered User regular
    Goatmon wrote: »
    Fearghaill wrote: »
    Well, for starters I would wish to be a little bit taller

    How tall are you?

    Pretty much six feet exactly

    So really, I'd be looking to grow about nine inches or so.

  • knitdanknitdan Registered User regular
    Xaquin wrote: »
    Buttcleft wrote: »
    I wish I was capable of trusting another human being.

    If you fall I will catch you
    I'll be waiting

    Time after time

    “I was quick when I came in here, I’m twice as quick now”
    -Indiana Solo, runner of blades
  • ButtcleftButtcleft Registered User regular
    Air wrote: »
    Haha catch him but then drop him right after
    That brief glimmer of hope makes it funnier

    Hi Mom

  • JebusUDJebusUD Adventure! Candy IslandRegistered User regular
    Fearghaill wrote: »
    Goatmon wrote: »
    Fearghaill wrote: »
    Well, for starters I would wish to be a little bit taller

    How tall are you?

    Pretty much six feet exactly

    So really, I'd be looking to grow about nine inches or so.

    HEYO! Grow. Nine inches. We'll make your wish come true.

    and I wonder about my neighbors even though I don't have them
    but they're listening to every word I say
  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    Fearghaill wrote: »
    Goatmon wrote: »
    Fearghaill wrote: »
    Well, for starters I would wish to be a little bit taller

    How tall are you?

    Pretty much six feet exactly

    So really, I'd be looking to grow about nine inches or so.

    man, you can't make a wish like this. You're going to end up with a cone head or really long finger nails or like super long shins or something.

    Djinn need specifics.

  • ButtcleftButtcleft Registered User regular
    Would you also, pray tell, wish to be a baller?

    How about a girl who looked good, would you call her?

  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    Buttcleft wrote: »
    Would you also, pray tell, wish to be a baller?

    How about a girl who looked good, would you call her?

    :nod:

  • VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    I'd wish for

    beach volleyball

  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    j5P60RC.gif

  • AirAir Registered User regular
    The hell is this snap crackle pop crap
    And agree and awesome
    Is this reddit

    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
  • PoorochondriacPoorochondriac Ah, man Ah, jeezRegistered User regular
    Air wrote: »
    The hell is this snap crackle pop crap
    And agree and awesome
    Is this reddit

    Good one

  • DJ EebsDJ Eebs Moderator, Administrator admin
    Air wrote: »
    The hell is this snap crackle pop crap
    And agree and awesome
    Is this reddit

    yes yeah you caught us

  • CorporateLogoCorporateLogo The toilet knows how I feelRegistered User regular
    Do not have a cow, mortal.

    c9PXgFo.jpg
  • AirAir Registered User regular
    Seriously though do crackle and pop have any implied meaning

    darjeelingshortsig95.jpg
  • KetBraKetBra Dressed Ridiculously Registered User regular
    edited December 2014
    It's roughly analogous to "So Raven?"

    KetBra on
    KGMvDLc.jpg?1
  • The GeekThe Geek Oh-Two Crew, Omeganaut Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Air wrote: »
    Seriously though do crackle and pop have any implied meaning

    Of course. You can't tell?

    BLM - ACAB
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