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It's our [Job] thread

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    TamTam Registered User regular
    this job went down the toilet into the Ur-toilet
    I think maybe if employees are expected to stay up to two hours after closing at the bank, something is not being run correctly
    Also any time there is a sales goal deficit now, the daily goals are doubled
    Why don't they just slam my head on my desk

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    ??
    that makes no sense.

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    BarcardiBarcardi All the Wizards Under A Rock: AfganistanRegistered User regular
    Well it is my job today and tomorrow to go on some business travel, basically so that I can stand there and be completely outnumbered in a room by the client and contractor.

    Take basic fear of public speaking, little knowledge on what's actually going to happen, and my job on the line and you can imagine my stress level right now.

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    TamTam Registered User regular
    edited February 2015
    tynic wrote: »
    ??
    that makes no sense.

    If we fall short of the daily goalby enough the next day's goals are doubled
    WE NEED TO MAKE UP THE GAP NIC

    Tam on
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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    capitalism is so dumb.

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    FlarneFlarne Registered User regular
    now that's just good business sense

    see when you make a sales budget the world instantly spawns the amount of people needed to buy your product and sets them on the path to your business

    you never know when during the year they'll show up, but they will

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    TamTam Registered User regular
    I look forward to the events you described in the Christmas card

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    FlarneFlarne Registered User regular
    Tam wrote: »
    I look forward to the events you described in the Christmas card

    was it that you'll be the first against the wall when the revolution comes?

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    if he keeps climbing the corporate structure he might be

    You better be undermining them from the inside, Tam, if you know what's good for you

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    DedwrekkaDedwrekka Metal Hell adjacentRegistered User regular
    Kochikens wrote: »
    TheStig wrote: »
    Had a little girl come in to the ER tonight for a popcorn kernel stuck in her ear. She was seen by a doc earlier somewhere else who referred her to a specialist to get it removed because they couldn't get it out. It was causing her too much pain so the dad wanted to get her checked.

    I got that shit out in like 5 minutes 8-) 8-) 8-)

    that is awesome

    but stuff stuck in your ear is my nightmare

    Behind spoilers if you don't want them nightmares:
    A friend of mine went to the ER because of a loud scratching sound in his ears. Turned out a small cockroach crawled in there and had to be dragged out. :?
    Been there. I had a trouble hearing out of my ear one day in high school, and something blocking my pinky from getting in there (I know, but I was young and reckless and wouldn't let the man tell me what couldn't be used to clean my ears). I pulled it out with tweezers. My reaction at the time was "huh", but I slept with cotton balls in my ears for a month.

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    ThegreatcowThegreatcow Lord of All Bacons Washington State - It's Wet up here innit? Registered User regular
    Tam wrote: »
    this job went down the toilet into the Ur-toilet
    I think maybe if employees are expected to stay up to two hours after closing at the bank, something is not being run correctly
    Also any time there is a sales goal deficit now, the daily goals are doubled
    Why don't they just slam my head on my desk

    Ahhhh memories. Not meeting your goals?
    Raise em up!
    Doing too well at your goals and exceeding them?
    Well you're doing so well, lets raise your targets!
    Branch as a whole not meeting quotas for checking accounts and credit cards?
    Lets "canvass" the neighborhood and go door to door asking if folks would be interested in signing up for our friendly neighborhood services!

    Why yes I have good memories....why do you ask? *twitch*

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    CambiataCambiata Commander Shepard The likes of which even GAWD has never seenRegistered User regular
    I've been at this company for 8 years now. All that time I could have been using the free tuition policy to improve myself for the job market, but I foolishly thought I'd be with Verizon for like 30 years, loading up on the union seniority. Sigh. I'll probably have to go back to phone support for my next job.

    "If you divide the whole world into just enemies and friends, you'll end up destroying everything" --Nausicaa of the Valley of Wind
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    hippofanthippofant ティンク Registered User regular
    MadEddy wrote: »
    Brb, screaming forever.

    Can't hear you over this weird scratching noise in my ear.

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    hippofanthippofant ティンク Registered User regular
    Liiya wrote: »
    Today in class my team won a bag of apples for knowing most about boundaries.

    Like... geography boundaries or don't touch people boundaries?

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    NaphtaliNaphtali Hazy + Flow SeaRegistered User regular
    dear airlines,

    why did you get rid of all of the good flights to greenville/spartanburg

    love,
    gofuckyourselves

    Steam | Nintendo ID: Naphtali | Wish List
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    LiiyaLiiya Registered User regular
    hippofant wrote: »
    Liiya wrote: »
    Today in class my team won a bag of apples for knowing most about boundaries.

    Like... geography boundaries or don't touch people boundaries?

    All boundaries! Geographical, emotional, social, political, economical. All the boundaries you need to think about when designing a space!

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    JebusUDJebusUD Adventure! Candy IslandRegistered User regular
    Dedwrekka wrote: »
    Kochikens wrote: »
    TheStig wrote: »
    Had a little girl come in to the ER tonight for a popcorn kernel stuck in her ear. She was seen by a doc earlier somewhere else who referred her to a specialist to get it removed because they couldn't get it out. It was causing her too much pain so the dad wanted to get her checked.

    I got that shit out in like 5 minutes 8-) 8-) 8-)

    that is awesome

    but stuff stuck in your ear is my nightmare

    Behind spoilers if you don't want them nightmares:
    A friend of mine went to the ER because of a loud scratching sound in his ears. Turned out a small cockroach crawled in there and had to be dragged out. :?
    Been there. I had a trouble hearing out of my ear one day in high school, and something blocking my pinky from getting in there (I know, but I was young and reckless and wouldn't let the man tell me what couldn't be used to clean my ears). I pulled it out with tweezers. My reaction at the time was "huh", but I slept with cotton balls in my ears for a month.

    Is this real life? I tend to pass this stuff off as urban legend, but someone here saying it personally happened to them rather than their friend friend makes me think twice.

    and I wonder about my neighbors even though I don't have them
    but they're listening to every word I say
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    JebusUDJebusUD Adventure! Candy IslandRegistered User regular
    hippofant wrote: »
    Liiya wrote: »
    Today in class my team won a bag of apples for knowing most about boundaries.

    Like... geography boundaries or don't touch people boundaries?

    Liiya only person to not ask what next weeks assignment will be 2 inches from professors face.

    and I wonder about my neighbors even though I don't have them
    but they're listening to every word I say
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    LuvTheMonkeyLuvTheMonkey High Sierra Serenade Registered User regular
    JebusUD wrote: »
    Dedwrekka wrote: »
    Kochikens wrote: »
    TheStig wrote: »
    Had a little girl come in to the ER tonight for a popcorn kernel stuck in her ear. She was seen by a doc earlier somewhere else who referred her to a specialist to get it removed because they couldn't get it out. It was causing her too much pain so the dad wanted to get her checked.

    I got that shit out in like 5 minutes 8-) 8-) 8-)

    that is awesome

    but stuff stuck in your ear is my nightmare

    Behind spoilers if you don't want them nightmares:
    A friend of mine went to the ER because of a loud scratching sound in his ears. Turned out a small cockroach crawled in there and had to be dragged out. :?
    Been there. I had a trouble hearing out of my ear one day in high school, and something blocking my pinky from getting in there (I know, but I was young and reckless and wouldn't let the man tell me what couldn't be used to clean my ears). I pulled it out with tweezers. My reaction at the time was "huh", but I slept with cotton balls in my ears for a month.

    Is this real life? I tend to pass this stuff off as urban legend, but someone here saying it personally happened to them rather than their friend friend makes me think twice.

    I can only pass on a friend's story but said friend absolutely had a bug in his ear many years ago. Had to flush it out with water.

    Molten variables hiss and roar. On my mind-forge, I hammer them into the greatsword Epistemology. Many are my foes this night.
    STEAM | GW2: Thalys
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    LiiyaLiiya Registered User regular
    JebusUD wrote: »
    hippofant wrote: »
    Liiya wrote: »
    Today in class my team won a bag of apples for knowing most about boundaries.

    Like... geography boundaries or don't touch people boundaries?

    Liiya only person to not ask what next weeks assignment will be 2 inches from professors face.

    Haha!

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    JebusUD wrote: »
    Dedwrekka wrote: »
    Kochikens wrote: »
    TheStig wrote: »
    Had a little girl come in to the ER tonight for a popcorn kernel stuck in her ear. She was seen by a doc earlier somewhere else who referred her to a specialist to get it removed because they couldn't get it out. It was causing her too much pain so the dad wanted to get her checked.

    I got that shit out in like 5 minutes 8-) 8-) 8-)

    that is awesome

    but stuff stuck in your ear is my nightmare

    Behind spoilers if you don't want them nightmares:
    A friend of mine went to the ER because of a loud scratching sound in his ears. Turned out a small cockroach crawled in there and had to be dragged out. :?
    Been there. I had a trouble hearing out of my ear one day in high school, and something blocking my pinky from getting in there (I know, but I was young and reckless and wouldn't let the man tell me what couldn't be used to clean my ears). I pulled it out with tweezers. My reaction at the time was "huh", but I slept with cotton balls in my ears for a month.

    Is this real life? I tend to pass this stuff off as urban legend, but someone here saying it personally happened to them rather than their friend friend makes me think twice.

    I can only pass on a friend's story but said friend absolutely had a bug in his ear many years ago. Had to flush it out with water.

    My sister had an inch-ant in her ear when she was a kid. Can definitely happen.

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    GizzyGizzy i am a cat PhoenixRegistered User regular
    edited February 2015
    Kochikens wrote: »
    TheStig wrote: »
    Had a little girl come in to the ER tonight for a popcorn kernel stuck in her ear. She was seen by a doc earlier somewhere else who referred her to a specialist to get it removed because they couldn't get it out. It was causing her too much pain so the dad wanted to get her checked.

    I got that shit out in like 5 minutes 8-) 8-) 8-)

    that is awesome

    but stuff stuck in your ear is my nightmare

    Behind spoilers if you don't want them nightmares:
    A friend of mine went to the ER because of a loud scratching sound in his ears. Turned out a small cockroach crawled in there and had to be dragged out. :?

    More spoilers for disturbing -
    I once dated a guy who lost hearing in one ear due to ....
    When he was around 3 his parents came to the states from Vietnam and lived in really crappy apartments for a while. A roach got in his ear and ATE part of it (the eardrum?). After the roach was removed - because his parents couldn't understand or read English well, they put medicine in his ear that was meant to be taken orally. Even though he was super young - the whole experience was so horrifying he remembers it vividly.

    Gizzy on
    Switch Animal Crossing Friend Code: SW-5107-9276-1030
    Island Name: Felinefine
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    QanamilQanamil x Registered User regular
    edited February 2015
    So we just had an active shooter situation a few blocks away on the campus (USC, if it isn't obvious). Heck of an hour until the rumors that it was a murder-suicide rather than active shooter were confirmed. All sorts of bad reports of shooting in other areas during that hour though and it was a bit harrowing.

    The danger passed, absolutely no work is getting done now.

    Qanamil on
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    JebusUDJebusUD Adventure! Candy IslandRegistered User regular
    Qanamil wrote: »
    So we just had an active shooter situation a few blocks away on the campus (USC, if it isn't obvious). Heck of an hour until the rumors that it was a murder-suicide rather than active shooter were confirmed. All sorts of bad reports of shooting in other areas during that hour though and it was a bit harrowing.

    The danger passed, absolutely no work is getting done now.

    Man, we had a guy shooting at the cops here the other day. Then some crazy chase, and they had a SWAT team come in and escort everyone out of a nearby Byerly's.

    One of the lady's coworkers was in Byerly's (a fancy grocery) at the time, and it was apparently the first time she had been there.

    and I wonder about my neighbors even though I don't have them
    but they're listening to every word I say
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    UsagiUsagi Nah Registered User regular
    I just got very angry that my mouse had up and shat itself and no amount of shaking or banging on the desk would fix it

    ...and then I realized I was holding an orange


    Mouse works fine, I however am broken as fuck

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    NaphtaliNaphtali Hazy + Flow SeaRegistered User regular
    Usagi wrote: »
    I just got very angry that my mouse had up and shat itself and no amount of shaking or banging on the desk would fix it

    ...and then I realized I was holding an orange


    Mouse works fine, I however am broken as fuck

    to be fair oranges aren't usb compatible, just ps/2

    Steam | Nintendo ID: Naphtali | Wish List
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    Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    Usagi wrote: »
    I just got very angry that my mouse had up and shat itself and no amount of shaking or banging on the desk would fix it

    ...and then I realized I was holding an orange


    Mouse works fine, I however am broken as fuck

    this is incredible

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    JoeUserJoeUser Forum Santa Registered User regular
    Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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    JoeUserJoeUser Forum Santa Registered User regular
    edited February 2015
    Whoops!

    JoeUser on
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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    well now I'm only half as glad.

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    DisruptedCapitalistDisruptedCapitalist I swear! Registered User regular
    Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

    hAh


    I got a good one, taught to me by my 6-year-old:

    KNOCK KNOCK
    Who's there?

    CHICKEN!
    Chicken who?
    COCKADOODLE DOO!

    KNOCK KNOCK! (etc. etc. ad nauseam)

    "Simple, real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time." -Mustrum Ridcully in Terry Pratchett's Hogfather p. 142 (HarperPrism 1996)
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    Slacker71Slacker71 subgenius RentonRegistered User regular
    I first wondered why you were upset about mouse poop? It is what mice do. You did not have to kill poor Algernon.

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    Librarian's ghostLibrarian's ghost Librarian, Ghostbuster, and TimSpork Registered User regular
    So I have this desktop monitoring software that lets me see live views of all the computers in the library and take them over and issue commands. We use it to make sure kids aren't playing quake or something.

    There is this company default logo that comes up when I hit the button that blanks their screens.

    I might have just changed it to a black screen with a red Hyrda and the words "Hail Hydra" below it.

    (Switch Friend Code) SW-4910-9735-6014(PSN) timspork (Steam) timspork (XBox) Timspork


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    facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    I feel like the forums should automatically add Hail Hydra buttons for posts that reference Hail Hydra.

    Although I realize that all that would mean would be that every post would have a random Hail Hydra in it.

    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
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    WeaverWeaver Who are you? What do you want?Registered User regular
    I may have to call in today depending on how the next hour goes. Just tweaked my back pretty bad at the gym. Scared to stand up.

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    WassermeloneWassermelone Registered User regular
    Usagi wrote: »
    I just got very angry that my mouse had up and shat itself and no amount of shaking or banging on the desk would fix it

    ...and then I realized I was holding an orange


    Mouse works fine, I however am broken as fuck

    With all the talk of timspork's literal mice, it took me far too long for me to realize you were not talking about mistaking an orange for a rodent pooping itself. It was a strange journey.

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    MadEddyMadEddy Creepy house watching youRegistered User regular
    Qanamil wrote: »
    So we just had an active shooter situation a few blocks away on the campus (USC, if it isn't obvious). Heck of an hour until the rumors that it was a murder-suicide rather than active shooter were confirmed. All sorts of bad reports of shooting in other areas during that hour though and it was a bit harrowing.

    The danger passed, absolutely no work is getting done now.

    I've been incredibly unproductive this afternoon because of that. Glad you're okay.

    ruby-red-sig.jpg
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    MadEddyMadEddy Creepy house watching youRegistered User regular
    Naphtali wrote: »
    dear airlines,

    why did you get rid of all of the good flights to greenville/spartanburg

    love,
    gofuckyourselves

    That's my home airport!

    And the answer is because they hate all that is good in the world.

    ruby-red-sig.jpg
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    WeaverWeaver Who are you? What do you want?Registered User regular
    Yeah my back is fucked. Called in, nearly collapsed outside the gym, had to take a cab home. I'll go to the VA hospital if I can't move more by tomorrow.

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    CambiataCambiata Commander Shepard The likes of which even GAWD has never seenRegistered User regular
    edited February 2015
    Yep, the official annoucement came down that Verizon Wireline in FL, TX, and CA are being sold off. At least I have a year to find a new job.

    Cambiata on
    "If you divide the whole world into just enemies and friends, you'll end up destroying everything" --Nausicaa of the Valley of Wind
This discussion has been closed.