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Cthulhu [chat]s

BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Fighting The Rising OddsRegistered User, Moderator mod
edited June 2015 in Debate and/or Discourse
Behold, insignificant mortals! Your doom has come in the form of brightly coloured Great Old Ones. Your cities are ash, your seas are boiling, and all that is left is to fight over the smouldering remnants.

8mF5R0J.jpg?1

This is Cthulhu Wars, a boardgame for up to four people (more can play with expansions), where each player is an unknowable, dread entity from beyond time and space. We played it last weekend. Mojo won, with the Crawling Chaos that is Nyarlathotep. I was the Black Goat, SHUB NIGGURATH, Japan and Bob were Cthulhu himself, and French Girl was Hastur, the King In Yellow.

Fun was had, souls were consumed, mistakes were made.

Bogart on
spacekungfumansurrealitycheckThomamelasRiemannLivesHakkekageNo-QuarterRMS OceanicBethrynKid PresentableQuidGimBeNarwhalSealPLAChanusthatassemblyguyJacobkoshTehSlothjakobaggerZilla360HaphazardEvigilantmysticjuicer
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Posts

  • RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic regular Registered User regular
    The Old Ones should all be the Colour Out Of Space

  • BethrynBethryn regular Registered User regular
    This chat brought to you by Geth's Finest Selection of British [chat]terrers.

    surrealitycheckZilla360
  • tyrannustyrannus regular Registered User regular
    japan

    Big 4 would be a pretty ballin' place to work

  • spacekungfumanspacekungfuman Poor and minority-filled Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    That is a very large image.

    7zh9uu9etcor.jpg
    Chanus wrote:
    It's been a butt come true! I get to work with the absolute best boobs in the business. What more could a money ask for? Kids, aim for the freeloaders !

    @chanus
  • ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    @japan,

    It's a pilot story. The odds of it being bullshit is very high. But it's amusing and illustrates why having a nuclear rocket could be handy.
    DARTS vs VIPERS
    Two Air Defense Interceptor Pilots vs Two Tactical Fighter Pilots
    By S. Michael Townsend, LTC, USAF (Ret.)
    “Viper 1, Pierre, Bucko, Genie, FMO, Rafsob”
    Circa 1984

    I was a Captain stationed at Tyndall AFB as an F-106 Instructor. This day my wingman, a fellow Captain and
    Instructor, and I were scheduled for Dissimilar AirCombat Training (DACT) with two F-16s from Shaw AFB. I
    was to be the Instructor for the training on the Air Combat Maneuvering Instrumentation Range (ACMI) over
    the Gulf of Mexico, a highly accurate tracking system that would record all maneuvers in the airspace by the
    aircraft, score all shots taken and simulate any kills. None of us had ever fought against the other type fighter.
    TacticalAir Command pilots considered Air Defensepilots a lesser breed.
    I started the preflight briefing after introductions with the Lieutenant Colonel (LTC) and his wingman a
    Lieutenant (LT). The LTC immediately interrupted and informed me that he had no idea why they were
    scheduled for DACT with aircraft that were far inferior to the F-16 and that it would not be much of a
    challenge for them resulting in very little effective training. He stated that we should engage with full up all
    weapons capability for both fighter types even stating that though they only had heaters (heat seeking
    missiles) and guns he saw no disadvantage for them.I hid the fact that he had pissed us off and verified that
    he meant for us to use the full weapons capability of the F-106. He replied, of course you can! Obviously he
    had no idea what we carried between our legs, a clueless state of mind! I smiled as I looked at my wingman
    while stroking the inside of my thigh; this pecker checker was going to get hammered when the Genie popped
    up!

    I briefed the LTC to take his flight to the farthest most southern point of the airspace and be prepared to
    attack the coastline that we would defend. We would place ourselves on “Five” (five minute alert) and
    scramble when we saw him takeoff giving him the advantage of being ready when we arrived. I told him to be
    sure to look at the F-106 ramp on takeoff to verifythat we there on “Five” and this would be important during
    the debrief. We briefed two engagements followed byjoin up for 1v1 basic fighter maneuvers (BFM), him
    versus me and the wingmen against each other.

    The fun began as they lifted off and saw us on the edge of the ramp, “communicating”, with a raisedfinger
    over two rising moons! We had a hard time getting our crew chiefs to stop laughing so we could launch.A gate
    (full afterburner) climb to 41,000 feet put us in the airspace in 6 minutes when I called “fight’s on”! I felt sorry
    for my wingman because he would not get a shot on this first engagement. One minute later I called “Fox 3,
    KILL, two F-16s north bound at 18,000 feet. Nock- it off, nock-it off, fights over, return to your safe area,” was
    immediately passed to the Viper pilots. The LTC wasso confused that the ground control intercept (GCI)
    controller had to tell him he had been shot by a “NUC” (Genie nuclear tipped rocket) and that him and his
    wingman were DEAD so return to your point! I told GCI to inform him that we had one more Genie but that we
    wouldn’t use it on the next engagement. Score: Darts 2, Vipers 0

    I put my wingman in four mile trail as we began the next engagement from 41,000 feet at 1.2 MACH racing
    down to their altitude of 18,000 feet, dumb a - - he didn’t even change his altitude to make it harderon us.
    Since they had face heaters (firing heat seekers inour face), we cooled our jets by retarding the engines to idle
    power to cool them off and denying the face shot while maintaining supersonic on our downhill slide. They
    took the bait, the leader rolled out behind me, thewingman behind mine. We had them right where we
    wanted them! Not even an F-16 can sustain a climb followed by a 9 G turn and roll out 2 miles behind a
    supersonic target and chase them down so the missile will make the kill. The leader found himself in front of
    my wingman who easily “Doe popped” him with two missiles while outrunning the F-16 wingman. Score:
    Darts 1, Vipers 0

    After a fuel check we split for 1v1 BFM. Starting from line abreast each fighter turns 45 degrees awayfrom
    the other to gain spacing. At the fight’s on call the fighters turn toward each other passing canopy to canopy
    with no advantage. The knife fight begins in earnest as they turn to gain six o’clock on the other fora guns kill.
    Hands are helpful in explaining what happens next. Obviously the Viper can out turn a Dart and the LTCwas
    behind me closing for guns! My next maneuver required exact timing or it would turn out all bad. As heclosed
    for the shot I presented him with the infamous “F-106 Barn Door”. This is a frightening experience foranyone
    who has never seen the Dart act in such an unbelievable aerodynamic manner. Never attempt this maneuver
    at home as it should only be done by a highly trained and experienced Dart driver! With him captured solidly
    at my six, in a hard four G turn, closing for the kill, fangs out and dripping, I held the G while applying full
    opposite rudder. The Dart responds beautifully withan opposite direction roll through the vertical toa full
    nose down dive where I apply full afterburner and dash for the deck. From the Viper’s cockpit it looked just
    like someone opened a barn door in his face, nowhere to go and no idea what to do. Suddenly the Dart
    disappears. His only option was to call nock-it offbecause he lost sight having never squeezed the trigger.
    Meanwhile our wingman had to nock-it off because the LT was low on fuel. Score: Darts 0, Vipers 0
    I sent the Vipers home and my wingman and I played for a while. My debriefing was short and sweet. The
    Fighterpilots had to fly again to get some real training.It went something like this: Know your enemy. Never
    underestimate your enemy. Never enter a gun fight with a knife. Never engage an enemy when you don’t
    have a clue. Lose sight lose the fight. Pecker checkers should be well endowed. When the Genie pops up,
    you’re goanna die! Nothing was ever said about the moons, I believe we “communicated” effectively!
    Final Score: Darts 3, Vipers 0 America remained safe from attack!!

    S. Michael Townsend, LTC, USAF Ret. “Viper 1, Pierre, Bucko, Genie, FMO, Rafsob”

    AManFromEarthjapanBogart
  • BethrynBethryn regular Registered User regular
    That image looked like it was going a very different way when loading:
    KXkgiz2.jpg

    (also it's a wee bit over 500kb)

  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Fighting The Rising Odds Registered User, Moderator mod
    We also Sherlock Holmesed it up over pizza in Consulting Detective, and guessed the murderer correctly but flubbed the precise reason. Holmes was a smug douche about it in the case lecture.

    We took notes and everything, like real detectives. It is a very fine game.

    surrealitycheck
  • surrealitychecksurrealitycheck lonely, but not unloved dreaming of faulty keys and latchesRegistered User regular
    did u see how polite i was brogart

    i waited

    because i am english and not a welshman

    also

    if i went back in time i would tell myself to focus more on fighting games and less on fps, fpses get boring way faster

    obF2Wuw.png
    BethrynBogart
  • VariableVariable Mouth Congress Stroke Me Lady FameRegistered User regular
    Bogart wrote: »
    We also Sherlock Holmesed it up over pizza in Consulting Detective, and guessed the murderer correctly but flubbed the precise reason. Holmes was a smug douche about it in the case lecture.

    We took notes and everything, like real detectives. It is a very fine game.

    I like the sound of this

    BNet-Vari#1998 | Switch-SW 6960 6688 8388 | Steam | Twitch
    Bogart
  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Fighting The Rising Odds Registered User, Moderator mod
    Ballsacks. It's over 500k? I can't tell on my iPad.

  • P10P10 An Idiot With Low IQ Registered User regular
    scheck u could focus on fight games now

    Shameful pursuits and utterly stupid opinions
    surrealitycheck
  • QuidQuid I don't... what... hnnng Registered User regular
    Z76MbOS.jpg

    RMS OceanicBogartBethrynBelasco32Zilla360
  • Harry DresdenHarry Dresden regular Registered User regular
    cthulhu-dagon.png

    BogartBethrynDelmainAresProphetZilla360
  • No-QuarterNo-Quarter Nothing To Fear But Fear ItselfRegistered User regular
    OMG I JUST ORDERED THAT GAME IN THE OP!

    eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
    EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

    @nexuscrawler @tapeslinger @Variable @Casual Eddy

    BogartsurrealitycheckVariableJacobkoshBelasco32Casual Eddy
  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Fighting The Rising Odds Registered User, Moderator mod
    I have changed the image. Maybe this one is under 500k. I can't tell!

  • BethrynBethryn regular Registered User regular
    The new one is even bigger!

    http://imgur.com/1gXVYEY here is the old one resized down to ~400kb

    Bogartspacekungfuman
  • surrealitychecksurrealitycheck lonely, but not unloved dreaming of faulty keys and latchesRegistered User regular
    P10 wrote: »
    scheck u could focus on fight games now

    no i am focusing on the real purpose of existence

    eating burgers and masturbating to pictures of spaniels

    obF2Wuw.png
  • P10P10 An Idiot With Low IQ Registered User regular
    Bogart wrote: »
    I have changed the image. Maybe this one is under 500k. I can't tell!
    nope
    banned 5 ever

    Shameful pursuits and utterly stupid opinions
    spacekungfuman
  • QuidQuid I don't... what... hnnng Registered User regular
    Bogart wrote: »
    I have changed the image. Maybe this one is under 500k. I can't tell!

    Nope

    Here you go

    Bogart
  • P10P10 An Idiot With Low IQ Registered User regular
    P10 wrote: »
    scheck u could focus on fight games now

    no i am focusing on the real purpose of existence

    eating burgers and masturbating to pictures of spaniels
    but my dreams

    Shameful pursuits and utterly stupid opinions
    surrealitycheck
  • surrealitychecksurrealitycheck lonely, but not unloved dreaming of faulty keys and latchesRegistered User regular
    P10 wrote: »
    P10 wrote: »
    scheck u could focus on fight games now

    no i am focusing on the real purpose of existence

    eating burgers and masturbating to pictures of spaniels
    but my dreams

    gJmBcSH.gif

    obF2Wuw.png
    RMS OceanicGimdescJacobkoshjakobaggerZilla360
  • Kid PresentableKid Presentable regular Registered User regular
    edited June 2015
    You guuuyyyys I wanted to feel good about the menial task of providing the link to a resized image for Bogart to use you're all too faaaassstttt

    *dejectedly closes imgur window*

    Kid Presentable on
    surrealitycheck
  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Fighting The Rising Odds Registered User, Moderator mod
    Cheers homps.

  • Kid PresentableKid Presentable regular Registered User regular
    Bogart wrote: »
    I have changed the image. Pray I don't change it any further.

    BethrynHarry DresdensurrealitycheckP10BogartRMS OceanicBeNarwhalJacobkoshBelasco32jakobagger
  • wazillawazilla regular Registered User regular
    scheck collects 499KB images.

    Posts at random

    Psn:wazukki
    surrealitycheckRMS OceanicQuidBeNarwhalPLABelasco32
  • P10P10 An Idiot With Low IQ Registered User regular
    "collects" he's a giffer

    Shameful pursuits and utterly stupid opinions
    surrealitycheck
  • spacekungfumanspacekungfuman Poor and minority-filled Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    Bogart wrote: »
    We also Sherlock Holmesed it up over pizza in Consulting Detective, and guessed the murderer correctly but flubbed the precise reason. Holmes was a smug douche about it in the case lecture.

    We took notes and everything, like real detectives. It is a very fine game.

    How much opium did you use while playing?

    7zh9uu9etcor.jpg
    Chanus wrote:
    It's been a butt come true! I get to work with the absolute best boobs in the business. What more could a money ask for? Kids, aim for the freeloaders !

    @chanus
  • surrealitychecksurrealitycheck lonely, but not unloved dreaming of faulty keys and latchesRegistered User regular
    wazilla wrote: »
    scheck collects 499KB images.

    Posts at random

    i actualy hand craft each one in the photoshop mines

    obF2Wuw.png
    BeNarwhal
  • spacekungfumanspacekungfuman Poor and minority-filled Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    @bogart - if you save image locally then upload you will see the file size.

    7zh9uu9etcor.jpg
    Chanus wrote:
    It's been a butt come true! I get to work with the absolute best boobs in the business. What more could a money ask for? Kids, aim for the freeloaders !

    @chanus
    Bogart
  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Fighting The Rising Odds Registered User, Moderator mod
    I should get those little t-shaped pushy stick things they used to move around models of fighter formations on maps during the war and move the plastic monstrosities around the map with those.

    wazillasurrealitycheckBethrynKid PresentableGimPLA
  • spacekungfumanspacekungfuman Poor and minority-filled Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    Guys, you press the button and just go back in time one day and put all your money into whatever stock had the biggest gain the day before at its lowest point, then sell at the high point. It's free money, and your life isn't otherwise changed.

    7zh9uu9etcor.jpg
    Chanus wrote:
    It's been a butt come true! I get to work with the absolute best boobs in the business. What more could a money ask for? Kids, aim for the freeloaders !

    @chanus
    BeNarwhalPLABelasco32
  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Fighting The Rising Odds Registered User, Moderator mod
    Bogart wrote: »
    We also Sherlock Holmesed it up over pizza in Consulting Detective, and guessed the murderer correctly but flubbed the precise reason. Holmes was a smug douche about it in the case lecture.

    We took notes and everything, like real detectives. It is a very fine game.

    How much opium did you use while playing?

    None. We drank two bottles of fizz and several litres of beer, however. Boardgames are thirsty work.

  • japanjapan regular Registered User regular
    I feel the need to point out that for a decent chunk of the duration of that game we were quaffing champagne

    BogartMojo_Jojo
  • DelmainDelmain regular Registered User regular
    I and my avatar approve of the topic of this [chat]

    syndalis wrote: »
    Apple is a terrible company.
    GimBelasco32
  • BethrynBethryn regular Registered User regular
    Guys, you press the button and just go back in time one day and put all your money into whatever stock had the biggest gain the day before at its lowest point, then sell at the high point. It's free money, and your life isn't otherwise changed.
    Well that's your use of the button.

    What if mine is to go back in time and abolish the wage system?

    P10Kid Presentablejakobagger
  • AiouaAioua Ora Occidens Ora OptimaRegistered User regular
    I'm going to go fuck with wu tang clan.

    life's a game that you're bound to lose / like using a hammer to pound in screws
    fuck up once and you break your thumb / if you're happy at all then you're god damn dumb
    that's right we're on a fucked up cruise / God is dead but at least we have booze
    bad things happen, no one knows why / the sun burns out and everyone dies
    surrealitycheck
  • DasUberEdwardDasUberEdward regular Registered User regular
    edited June 2015
    I just had a terrifying thought.

    What if this reality.

    is the result of me going back in time to fix a perceived problem.

    and this terrible world is what I got.

    i. . .

    DasUberEdward on
    steam_sig.png
    Kid PresentableBethrynBelasco32AresProphetZilla360
  • Kid PresentableKid Presentable regular Registered User regular
    When Darth Vader tells Lando Calrissian to "pray" that he doesn't alter the deal any further, what do you think that means in the Star Wars universe?

    Does this suggest the existence of religions and deities? How does The Force fit into this scheme? When Luke Skywalker's lightsaber flies from the ground into his hand allowing him to free himself from the frozen wampa prison, did he do that with his own power or was he actually just praying to The Force to move it for him?

    Our Force, who art in heaven, please shoot lightning out of my hands, amen.

    Belasco32
  • Kid PresentableKid Presentable regular Registered User regular
    I just had a terrifying thought.

    What if this reality.

    is the result of me going back in time to fix a perceived problem.

    and this terrible world is what I got.

    i. . .

    DUE

    What have you done

    descBelasco32
  • BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    Aioua wrote: »
    I'm going to go fuck with wu tang clan.

    N-no!

    He/Him
    Narwhal, you should make "Sometimes while someone is explaining something to me, I am thinking about rockets" your signature
    Delmain
This discussion has been closed.