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Hardly Working in the [Job] Thread

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    ElbasunuElbasunu Registered User regular
    Tox wrote: »
    Heard around the office today:

    Person 1: Wow there's a lot of guys requesting name changes today
    Person 2: Yup
    Person 1: I wonder why that is?
    Person 2: ...wait for it
    Person 3:
    Person 2:
    Person 3: ooooooh

    I'm not sure I get it!

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    Steam ID: Obos Vent: Obos
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    Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    tynic wrote: »
    From Friday, I'm available for freelance consulting. I know nothing whatsoever about your field, but hey.

    edit: also this kind of forward-thinking does not bode well for your company's ability to stay in business.

    Nurses suffer a lot of back injuries and shit from helping patients in and out of bed and stuff. I have a basic idea for a thing that could help them with that. All I need is for you to design, engineer, test, bring into mass production, and market these things, and you can have 5% of the net income of THE CHRIS and Tynic COMPANY THAT MAKES A THING FOR TO HELP NURSES GET INJURED AT WORK LESS Pty. Ltd.

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    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Liiya wrote: »
    tynic wrote: »
    Liiya wrote: »
    @Tynic are you enjoying the hot weather. I have nearly disintegrated twice.

    ...hot? Where?

    (Also it's barely hitting 23 down here, I'm still taking a jacket everywhere).

    It is 28/9 degrees in Manchester!! Plus I am bang in the city centre nearly so it is a heat bubble.

    I'll swap with you, but i'll have to remember to bring a jumper.

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    ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    Elbasunu wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    Heard around the office today:

    Person 1: Wow there's a lot of guys requesting name changes today
    Person 2: Yup
    Person 1: I wonder why that is?
    Person 2: ...wait for it
    Person 1:
    Person 2:
    Person 1: ooooooh

    I'm not sure I get it!

    yeah I don't know why I added a 3rd person there.

    Gay marriage is legal here now, so men are marrying other men, which increases the number of men changing their legal name!

    Twitter! | Dilige, et quod vis fac
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    YukiraYukira Registered User regular
    Goose! wrote: »
    So, IT help desk folk, what do I gotta do to get into your field. Do I need a degree?

    Sound pleasant on the phone, and actually fill in what's going on in the ticket with some detail*, and take screenshots*.

    *
    Judging by most helpdesk employees, anything more than "Computer Problem," to paraphrase, is going above and beyond expectations.**

    **
    With notable exceptions

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    NocrenNocren Lt Futz, Back in Action North CarolinaRegistered User regular
    Tox wrote: »
    Heard around the office today:

    Person 1: Wow there's a lot of guys requesting name changes today
    Person 2: Yup
    Person 1: I wonder why that is?
    Person 2: ...wait for it
    Person 1:
    Person 2:
    Person 1: ooooooh

    I love seeing the "delayed-dawning reaction" in the wild. It's something that should only be in cartoons or sitcoms, but it's real.

    newSig.jpg
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    ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    Yeah I decided to end that conversation there. The rest of it....is not nearly as cute.

    Twitter! | Dilige, et quod vis fac
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    SheriSheri Resident Fluffer My Living RoomRegistered User regular
    Madican wrote: »
    I wonder what dunderhead made these envelopes that explicitly say "Do Not Seal" and then added that sticky-when-wet patch on the back that enables inmates to seal them.

    We get mail from inmates sometimes

    We file it directly into the trash

    Sorry folks

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    mullymully Registered User regular
    What on earth would an inmate want to say to Disney?

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    SyphyreSyphyre A Dangerous Pastime Registered User regular
    "The first 10 minutes of Up made me cry. Thanks Disney"

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    Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    "Frozen is my favourite out of the movies they let us watch if we are well-behaved"?

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    SheriSheri Resident Fluffer My Living RoomRegistered User regular
    Yeah sometimes it's just letters about movies or the parks, and sometimes it's nonsensical and kind of creepy drawings

    There's a range

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    ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    Sheri wrote: »
    Yeah sometimes it's just letters about movies or the parks, and sometimes it's nonsensical and kind of creepy drawings

    There's a range

    "...wear you like a coat, etc"

    Twitter! | Dilige, et quod vis fac
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    SheriSheri Resident Fluffer My Living RoomRegistered User regular
    A few weeks ago we had drawings that included a Donnie Darko-style bunny with a gun, and one was a ninja with a sword

    I mean bunny ninja I get

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    FaranguFarangu I am a beardy man With a beardy planRegistered User regular
    Are there forumers that help to improve resumes? Because work atmosphere is getting to the point that I'll probably want to start looking soon, and mine is probably in need of a punch-up.

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    Bad-BeatBad-Beat Registered User regular
    Turns out I have to give a 3-5 slide presentation for this interview next week. Then, after a further half hour discussion about my skills etc, I'll be left on my own for half and hour to formulate a letter regarding a specific industry issue. Finished off with analysis of said letter.

    The managing director doesn't fuck around when it comes to interviews!!

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    DocshiftyDocshifty Registered User regular
    I have an interview tomorrow for a guard position. At a security agency.

    At Indiana Packers. The place I just quit.

    Oh world, you so crazy.

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    Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond Hubbard Mordor XenuRegistered User regular
    Sheri wrote: »
    A few weeks ago we had drawings that included a Donnie Darko-style bunny with a gun, and one was a ninja with a sword

    I mean bunny ninja I get

    The idea of convicted felons starting up their own animation studio (Big House Studios) is both hilarious to me and somewhat worrying that I actually find it funny.

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    DocshiftyDocshifty Registered User regular
    What's really funny is I didn't actually finish the application, I submitted my resume and filled out their questionnaire, then got distracted by dogs needing to be taken care of.

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    NocrenNocren Lt Futz, Back in Action North CarolinaRegistered User regular
    Docshifty wrote: »
    I have an interview tomorrow for a guard position. At a security agency.

    At Indiana Packers. The place I just quit.

    Oh world, you so crazy.

    I had the inverse happen to me when I applied for MediCal state position and I was also a guard for the building. I wasn't the only one either.

    newSig.jpg
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    DocshiftyDocshifty Registered User regular
    Nocren wrote: »
    Docshifty wrote: »
    I have an interview tomorrow for a guard position. At a security agency.

    At Indiana Packers. The place I just quit.

    Oh world, you so crazy.

    I had the inverse happen to me when I applied for MediCal state position and I was also a guard for the building. I wasn't the only one either.

    I mean, they call this town Dead Fly instead of Delphi for a reason, so I can't imagine they're getting too many applicants.

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    ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    Ugh

    just got done doing some preliminary job hunting.

    Yes please tell me how your entry level helpdesk position requires a 4-year degree, at least 1 year of experience, A+ and/or Net+ certification, completely open availability 24/7 including holidays, and pays a whopping $10/hr!

    Like oh man who's dick do I have to suck to get that job.

    Twitter! | Dilige, et quod vis fac
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    MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    mully wrote: »
    What on earth would an inmate want to say to Disney?

    Inmates fucking love Disney movies. Frozen is one of the most requested movies around here.

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    bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Tox wrote: »
    Ugh

    just got done doing some preliminary job hunting.

    Yes please tell me how your entry level helpdesk position requires a 4-year degree, at least 1 year of experience, A+ and/or Net+ certification, completely open availability 24/7 including holidays, and pays a whopping $10/hr!

    Like oh man who's dick do I have to suck to get that job.

    IT is kind of weird.

    Those positions stay open perpetually.

    There's one here in Syracuse that's been open for about 8 years now.

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
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    DidgeridooDidgeridoo Flighty Dame Registered User regular
    45 minutes left of work, then I'm off for the summer until school starts back up again for the kids.

    ...I think I've been sucked into a parallel dimension where time passes at an agonizingly slow crawl

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    ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    edited June 2015
    I just don't get it.

    Like

    are you intentionally putting over-the-top qualifications on an entry level job just to psyche people out?

    How do you justify calling a job entry level and requiring prior experience?

    Let me sit in your brain while you explain that to me.

    Tox on
    Twitter! | Dilige, et quod vis fac
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    bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Tox wrote: »
    I just don't get it.

    Like

    are you intentionally putting over-the-top qualifications on an entry level job just to psyche people out?

    How do you justify calling a job entry level and requiring prior experience?

    Let me sit in your brain while you explain that to me.

    It sort of happens when they train people for call center. So they drop $1000 to train someone up for call answering. Then the person leaves to greener pastures because hey it's only $10 an hour and now that I'm experienced I can get $13 an hour doing something a lot better than this.

    So after a few months of this, the supervisor gets pissed at the under staffing and tells HR that they want someone who already knows what they're doing to save on churn. So he puts a pretty middle ground "we need someone who knows how to do the stuff we would train you on so you can hit the ground running and there's lower chance you'll want to leave after being here for a few months."

    They think it's brilliant. All it does is get them desperate for people to fill those seats. This in turn gets them desperate employees who have nothing better coming along.

    But anyone who knows anything about employment knows that it's much easier to get a job once you have one, so people still use this as a stepping stone. Then the supervisor puts even more stringent controls on it until it gets to the point that no one wants to work there ever and everyone is miserable.

    All of which would be fixed if they just take all that money and time and throw an extra few dollars an hour at a person. Oh it's a call center position that is pretty much terrible? Here's $15 an hour, you can get 40 hours and some overtime too, and some okay health coverage.

    This is the kind of job where you want to encourage longer term employment and give bonuses because of how shit the work is, but the race to the fucking bottom and "lean" is all people understand because they read it in a book somewhere.

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
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    ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    Seriously.

    I worked for helpdesk for Kangaroo gas stations and they paid us $16/hr as temps, paid lunches, and we could earn like an hour of sick time a week (for a temp on a ~6 month project that is insanely good). They did this because they wanted us to stick around, because they want to recruit folks, because something like 90% of their in-house IT staff started on the helpdesk.

    Twitter! | Dilige, et quod vis fac
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    DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    We get the occasional letter from inmates as well.

    One recent dude requested a grappling hook, game of thrones letter opener, and a my little pony plush.

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    bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Tox wrote: »
    Seriously.

    I worked for helpdesk for Kangaroo gas stations and they paid us $16/hr as temps, paid lunches, and we could earn like an hour of sick time a week (for a temp on a ~6 month project that is insanely good). They did this because they wanted us to stick around, because they want to recruit folks, because something like 90% of their in-house IT staff started on the helpdesk.

    This is how you do it.

    I bet it was amazing too, wasn't it? Something you were like "fuck yeah gonna get some free pizza today!" sort of thing almost every day.

    The littleist things go the furthest. A free lunch, a can of soda on your desk, a "hey man, good job, here's $100 giftcard to amazon". Just small tokens in the greater scheme and budget but... morale and recruiting it's amazing to be able to do that.

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
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    Goose!Goose! That's me, honey Show me the way home, honeyRegistered User regular
    edited June 2015
    Tox wrote: »
    Heard around the office today:

    Person 1: Wow there's a lot of guys requesting name changes today
    Person 2: Yup
    Person 1: I wonder why that is?
    Person 2: ...wait for it
    Person 1:
    Person 2:
    Person 1: ooooooh

    I miss something?

    EDIT: Ah, new page.

    Anyway, update to the previous post: I talked to the IT guy in my building and he told me to get my A+ certification and take the civil service test, so I will be doing both of those things ASAP.

    Goose! on
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    MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    We get the occasional letter from inmates as well.

    One recent dude requested a grappling hook, game of thrones letter opener, and a my little pony plush.

    My coworkers laughed when I made the half-joke to put MLP on the TV's. I don't watch it myself but I think the inmates would.

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    JayKaosJayKaos Registered User regular
    Madican wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    We get the occasional letter from inmates as well.

    One recent dude requested a grappling hook, game of thrones letter opener, and a my little pony plush.

    My coworkers laughed when I made the half-joke to put MLP on the TV's. I don't watch it myself but I think the inmates would.

    Yeah but then someone's gonna diss Fluttershy and then you've got a stabbing on your hands.

    Steam | SW-0844-0908-6004 and my Switch code
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    ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    edited June 2015
    bowen wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    Seriously.

    I worked for helpdesk for Kangaroo gas stations and they paid us $16/hr as temps, paid lunches, and we could earn like an hour of sick time a week (for a temp on a ~6 month project that is insanely good). They did this because they wanted us to stick around, because they want to recruit folks, because something like 90% of their in-house IT staff started on the helpdesk.

    This is how you do it.

    I bet it was amazing too, wasn't it? Something you were like "fuck yeah gonna get some free pizza today!" sort of thing almost every day.

    The littleist things go the furthest. A free lunch, a can of soda on your desk, a "hey man, good job, here's $100 giftcard to amazon". Just small tokens in the greater scheme and budget but... morale and recruiting it's amazing to be able to do that.

    Have I mentioned my shift started at 5am?

    and it was a ~45 minute drive?

    ...I was still always early for work, too, because yeah, it was fucking fun.

    Although to be fair the free pizza came from the temp agency, not Kangaroo. The staff at Kangaroo really just killed it by constantly being friendly and cool and like I'd be on smoke break with a buddy talking about a ticket I had to send up to tier 2 and one of the supervisors would be out there and overhear and be like, "Hey next time try x, y, z, see where that gets you." and it was like

    Ugh I miss that job. I wish they'd hired me.

    Tox on
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    DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    JayKaos wrote: »
    Madican wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    We get the occasional letter from inmates as well.

    One recent dude requested a grappling hook, game of thrones letter opener, and a my little pony plush.

    My coworkers laughed when I made the half-joke to put MLP on the TV's. I don't watch it myself but I think the inmates would.

    Yeah but then someone's gonna diss Fluttershy and then you've got a stabbing on your hands.

    Well no fucking shit. Rarity is best pony.

    I gotta find new employment

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    DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    Madican wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    We get the occasional letter from inmates as well.

    One recent dude requested a grappling hook, game of thrones letter opener, and a my little pony plush.

    My coworkers laughed when I made the half-joke to put MLP on the TV's. I don't watch it myself but I think the inmates would.

    I really appreciated the bravado it took to ask for a grappling hook. That's just some batman wall scaling levels of humor there. The letter opener...little less amused by. The pony? Whatever gets you through the day. (he mentioned it was for his kid who comes and visits.)

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    MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    JayKaos wrote: »
    Madican wrote: »
    DrZiplock wrote: »
    We get the occasional letter from inmates as well.

    One recent dude requested a grappling hook, game of thrones letter opener, and a my little pony plush.

    My coworkers laughed when I made the half-joke to put MLP on the TV's. I don't watch it myself but I think the inmates would.

    Yeah but then someone's gonna diss Fluttershy and then you've got a stabbing on your hands.

    Well no fucking shit. Rarity is best pony.

    I gotta find new employment

    Imagine the chaos I could sow if they had Internet access.

    Let me tell you about Homestuck.

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    SilverWindSilverWind Registered User regular
    Lady, "Please get me [important document] so I can prep for Friday morning" is not a request you should send mid afternoon on Tuesday, where Wednesday is a national holiday and it takes hours to pull it from the court file. Not unless you want to be hit with an out of office responder, and to get your document mid Thursday.

    Uuuugh, I do wish I could help but that's not a burden I'm placing on my coworker that is flying solo today, no siree.

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    CalicaCalica Registered User regular
    edited June 2015
    I came back to work from a 3-week vacation (woo!) to find several voicemails waiting for me. This is kind of weird because I'm a developer, and the only calls I ever get are wrong numbers - I actually unplugged my phone over a year ago and have never had cause to regret it. (Our voicemails are delivered electronically; we get an automated email with the message attached.)

    So these calls were from someone looking for a person named "Jeremy" at a different company entirely. I think, from context, that Jeremy is either an HR person or a recruiter? It doesn't matter. I called the number she left and left a message informing her it was a wrong number. But I really wonder how that happened. To reach me, you'd have to call the company I work for and either enter my extension, or type my name into the phone menu directory thing. Either way, you'd hear the message that says, "You've reached [Company]." So... how?

    Calica on
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    TofystedethTofystedeth Registered User regular
    Tox wrote: »
    Ugh

    just got done doing some preliminary job hunting.

    Yes please tell me how your entry level helpdesk position requires a 4-year degree, at least 1 year of experience, A+ and/or Net+ certification, completely open availability 24/7 including holidays, and pays a whopping $10/hr!

    Like oh man who's dick do I have to suck to get that job.

    Tox, where you live? Also you know some things about medical stuff?

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This discussion has been closed.