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[TRENCHES] Friday, August 21, 2015 - Why Else Would They Be So Defensive

GethGeth LegionPerseus VeilRegistered User, Moderator, Penny Arcade Staff, Vanilla Staff vanilla
edited August 2015 in The Penny Arcade Hub
Why Else Would They Be So Defensive


Why Else Would They Be So Defensive
http://trenchescomic.com/comic/post/why-else-would-they-be-so-defensive

Pinch this one off

Anonymous

I worked at a successful - but poorly managed - App development kit company. After failing to be acquired by some big names in the business, the CEO - who had been hired, it seemed, expressly for this purpose - was starting to get aggressive in finding solutions in getting the ship moving in the right direction..

Based out of California, several states away, he had no context of the day-to-day operations. He just wanted to see progress, and threw anyone under the bus with the board who seemed to be hindering his success.

After several of our better developers jumped ship, or quit outright due to his mismanagement, his finger of blame landed on the studio director - who, up until that point, had been a staunch ally of the product. He was forced out… and his place, a man was hired who’s technical resume was - on paper - fairly convincing. The CEO bought in 100%, throwing his support behind the new “Technical Director” and pushing us on to what he claimed would be fresh view and an unquestionable path to success.

On his first day, it became readily apparent why the new director’s reputation around town was entirely accurate. He immediately destroyed the Agile processes we’d been using since another reorganization (a successful one, to that point) - insisting that a more “fluid” approach really helped developers shine. (His fluid approach: No methodology) He made it abundantly clear that no one, including production or QA, had any right to “tell devs what to do” because they “couldn’t code and don’t really understand it”. He then insisted that instead of a producer, all development and studio activity would pass through him. He jumped on the company forums, posting sweeping changes he’d planned for the next few months - re-birthing the entire product and taking the reigns to, I quote, “Clean up this shitstorm”. It was clear to us internally that he was overpromising to a degree hitherto unknown to mortals… but he was confident in his own powers.

He essentially made himself King of the studio, and ruled accordingly, hiring lackeys who could tolerate his constant barrage of fecal metaphors, horrible jokes, discriminatory comments, passive aggressiveness, narcissism and megalomania. The man was a clusterbomb of horrible personality traits. He went on to replace good people with his own private stash of lackeys, and elevating anyone in the organization who was willing to kiss his ass appropriately. One example, a woman who worked in QA, quickly became his confidant - and after a very short period - they (both married) began a very thinly-veiled affair. Shortly thereafter they proclaimed their love, she was graciously elevated from a “lowly QA” to a engineer position - with no real experience.

Months later, having jumped ship myself and landed in a much more stable, healthy environment, I lament my friends still caught at the company. To this day, not a single one of his grandiose claims or plans has come to pass. The tool kit continues to languish with the same poorly written shortcomings that their competitors have overcome a year ago or more.

I’m sure that when, and it’ll be a definite “when”, the company finally tanks due to his poor leadership and skills, he’ll have a fecal metaphor to crown that, too.


Geth on

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    fortyforty Registered User regular
    Digiorno is great and I don't understand the title of this one.

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    RatherDashing89RatherDashing89 Registered User regular
    Even if it is overexplained, this one is actually pretty good.

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    streeverstreever Registered User regular
    forty wrote: »
    Digiorno is great and I don't understand the title of this one.

    Digiorno ads could be read as being defensive, that is what the title refers to.

    On a side note: Digiorno is definitely not great. New Haven, New York, these are the places where you can get a truly great pizza. Digiorno is on par with chain pizza. LET THE GREAT PIZZA WARS COMMENCE.

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    The WolfmanThe Wolfman Registered User regular
    I've had many a frozen pizza. Some are good. Others are really good. I'd even rank some above certain delivery places.

    The Digiorno idea that you couldn't tell the difference though? Bullshit. There's a difference, and you can absolutely tell.

    "The sausage of Green Earth explodes with flavor like the cannon of culinary delight."
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    Gamer8585Gamer8585 Registered User regular
    I've had Digiorno only once. Was looking for a good frozen pizza and decided to try it based on the adds; fucking terrible even by frozen pizza standards.

    If you want a good frozen pizza Newman's Own is the way to go. Even Mama Celeste will do if you're looking for something cheap. Like Q said Digiorno is bullshit.

    Oh and I think this makes the 3rd good comic in a row. Looks like Ty is finally getting into the swing.

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    Finnish_LineFinnish_Line Registered User regular
    You can find Digiorno on sale sometimes REALLY cheap. If you're broke it's a good option instead of spending 5x as much on delivered pizza.

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    RatherDashing89RatherDashing89 Registered User regular
    I make zero foods from scratch. I am not a from scratch food maker. But I find pizza to be so easy to make by buying a crust and ingredients that, while I appreciate takeout (it tastes better, or in the case of Little Caesers, is ready now), I just don't understand frozen pizza. Now that I'm married to someone who can actually make dough out of flour and other stuff I don't understand, I see even less reason to consider frozen pizza. Plus the good ones are the ginormous ones at Walmart that don't fit in any ovens ever.

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    jothkijothki Registered User regular
    I'm a fan of Ellio's myself. Plain cheese, throw on some pepperoni, cook until the pepperoni is crispy. Semi-bland goodness.

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    fortyforty Registered User regular
    Y'all are a bunch of blasphemous heathens.

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    metroidkillahmetroidkillah Local Bunman Free Country, USARegistered User regular
    Plus the good ones are the ginormous ones at Walmart that don't fit in any ovens ever.
    Get the ultimate meat pizza; throw on fresh onion, green pepper, mushrooms, whatever you want; and extra mozzerella; and BAM- one of the best pizza you've ever eaten. Make sure to turn on the broiler of a few minutes at the end to get a proper brown on the cheese and crisp to the crust.

    For realsies.

    I'm not a nice guy, I just play one in real life.
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