This Thread Will Go Down in [History]

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  • PeasPeas Registered User regular
    Timothy Dexter: The Dumbest Rags-to-Riches Story 9:06

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  • PeasPeas Registered User regular
    A Japanese UFO? - The Utsuro-Bune Incident of 1803 17:23

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  • PeasPeas Registered User regular
    Letter from Genghis Khan Asking for the Secret of Eternal Life // (1219) Invitation to Taoist Monk 5:37


    By the end of his reign, Genghis Khan was the most powerful man in history. As he oversaw his vast empire, there was one final enemy he found himself facing - his own mortality. Here we have the letter Genghis wrote to the famous Taoist monk Qiu Chuji urging him to cross the vast distance to come to his court, as the Supreme Khan wished to discover the secret of "preserving life" - immortality.

    Check out the original source (and the story of the monk) at this excellent website:
    https://depts.washington.edu/silkroad...

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  • VeeveeVeevee WisconsinRegistered User regular
    Probably been linked before, but here is a digital collection of over 150,000 historical maps https://www.davidrumsey.com/

    here's a selection of 120 maps over google earth https://rumsey.geogarage.com/

    Enjoy

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  • MayabirdMayabird Pecking at the keyboardRegistered User regular
    Reposted from D&D's history thread, for those who don't head over there.


    First, a thread on the tomb of Khnumhotep and Niankhkhnum of ancient Egypt:















    EEfxxjsWkAA9-RS?format=jpg&name=small

    For those who can't see the Twitter thread, the text is under spoilers here (to keep it neater).
    OKAY JUST A COUPLE OF THINGS.

    Egyptians wrote down a lot; it's why we know so much about them.

    HOWEVER. Their opinions on queer love/sex remain opaque. Researchers have never found anything condemning it. But they've never found anything saying We Love This, it's Cool, either.

    Buuuuut there is This One Mastaba (tomb) from the Fifth Dynasty (The Old Kingdom), meant for the remains of two men, Khnumhotep and Niankhkhnum.

    Khnumhotep and Niankhkhnum shared the title "Overseers of the Royal Manicurists," which was prestigious; not just anybody could touch the royal family, who are, naturally, living gods.

    They were also both married to women, and both had children.

    But they were buried together.

    The frescoes on the walls of their mastaba depict them hunting together, feasting, embracing, and bumping noses (widely accepted to be a depiction of kissing).

    Their kids and wives are also shown, but usually off to the side. And they're never shown embracing their wives.

    In Ancient Egypt, people buried together anticipated spending eternity together. Sharing a tomb is a testament to an unwillingness to be separated, even in death.

    There's a strong argument here that Khnumhotep and Niankhkhnum are the first same-sex couple in recorded history.

    Do we have a concrete declaration anywhere that their love was explicitly romantic? Okay, no. But Egyptians typically entombed themselves with family, spouses, and pets.

    Not besties.

    And personally speaking? This walks like a duck, and it quacks like a duck.

    It's leaving feathers everywhere.

    It just laid an egg.

    It's a duck.

    But that's just one tomb, right? Could just be an aberration...

    ENFlMAcXYAAAWMN?format=jpg

    Though officially

    ENFlMAZXUAAmEXB?format=jpg

    Sure, just like with those two men in the tomb, they're depicted exactly the way married couples are only same sex, but that's just two...

    ENIVLXNWkAE4rPa?format=jpg&name=medium

    ENIVLJ2WkAALRUy?format=jpg&name=medium

    You know, I'm starting to see two patterns here.


    Tl;dr Ancient Egypt doesn't seem nearly as homophobic as the archaeologists who have tried to study them.

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  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    They're just... real good friends, that's all!

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  • FencingsaxFencingsax It is difficult to get a man to understand, when his salary depends upon his not understanding GNU Terry PratchettRegistered User regular
    Cousins. They're cousins.

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  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    Moriveth wrote: »
    They're just... real good friends, that's all!

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    guys being bros, ya know?

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  • GundiGundi Serious Bismuth Registered User regular
    gives a whole new meaning to walk like an egyptian

  • Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    They might be relatives or colleagues. Those are the only two options.

  • JedocJedoc Once to start a new life and once just to start a fireRegistered User regular
    They might be relatives or colleagues. Those are the only two options.

    If I could make a livin' outta lovin' you
    I'd have us both entombed at the feet of Khufu
    I'd rock the Field of Reeds right next to my boo
    If I could make a livin' outta lovin' you

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  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    *wipes away tear*

  • PeasPeas Registered User regular
    edited January 23
    Holy cow I didn't know this was possible
    5kc6kwhovj0w.jpgExtreme heat from the Mount Vesuvius eruption in Italy was so immense it turned one victim's brain into glass, a study has suggested.

    BBC link:
    https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-51221334


    Edit:
    Scientists replicated a mummified Egyptian priest's voice with artificial vocal chords

    BBC link:
    https://www.bbc.com/news/world-middle-east-51223828

    Why?

    Peas on
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  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
    well that's fuckin metal

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  • HobnailHobnail Registered User regular
    edited January 23
    This is what I get for bein a month behind on History Magazine, non-topical frog murder

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    The back of the card reads "...unlike this unfortunate amphibian."

    Hobnail on
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  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Oh hello History Thread

    I didn't know until today that Brazilian troops fought in Europe during WW2

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  • GundiGundi Serious Bismuth Registered User regular
    that is

    the best christmas card i have ever seen

    The Cow King
  • MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    This is what I get for bein a month behind on History Magazine, non-topical frog murder

    SsVM4NS.jpg

    Scrooge gets croaked

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    PSN: AuthorFrost
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  • BaidolBaidol I will hold him off Escape while you canRegistered User regular
    I appreciate how the murdered frog had money, but no clothes. Poor chap was just looking to buy some pants.

    Steam Overwatch: Baidol#1957
  • HobnailHobnail Registered User regular
    Oh he had clothes, murderer frog has taken everything

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  • JedocJedoc Once to start a new life and once just to start a fireRegistered User regular
    Platy wrote: »
    Oh hello History Thread

    I didn't know until today that Brazilian troops fought in Europe during WW2

    Man, that's a bunch of troops.

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    Elvenshae
  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    well that's fuckin metal

    Dude it says it's glass right there

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  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    (I hate myself for making that joke)

  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
    Platy wrote: »
    Oh hello History Thread

    I didn't know until today that Brazilian troops fought in Europe during WW2

    SMOKIN COBRAS BABEEEEYYYYY

    Gvzbgul
  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    It's kind of amazing like, as an example of the sheer scale of the war

    A whole reinforced division! And yet such a tiny drop in the ocean people don't even remember they were there at all

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  • JuggernutJuggernut Registered User regular
    I just came in to post about the Mummy voice.

    Man, what if we somehow completely recreate a synthetic human from history? Like a hyper realistic wax model but on a fully ambulatory skeletal system with functional vocal chords. You could go see a mummy and then actually see the guy running his Egyptian church services with his actual voice from 3000 years ago.

    Wait never mind I actually hate that idea that's terrible.

    The actual Egyptians probably would've been down with it, tho.

  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Juggernut wrote: »
    I just came in to post about the Mummy voice.

    Man, what if we somehow completely recreate a synthetic human from history? Like a hyper realistic wax model but on a fully ambulatory skeletal system with functional vocal chords. You could go see a mummy and then actually see the guy running his Egyptian church services with his actual voice from 3000 years ago.

    Wait never mind I actually hate that idea that's terrible.

    The actual Egyptians probably would've been down with it, tho.

    Sounds like a plot point from Jurassic Park III

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  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    Juggernut wrote: »
    I just came in to post about the Mummy voice.

    Man, what if we somehow completely recreate a synthetic human from history? Like a hyper realistic wax model but on a fully ambulatory skeletal system with functional vocal chords. You could go see a mummy and then actually see the guy running his Egyptian church services with his actual voice from 3000 years ago.

    Wait never mind I actually hate that idea that's terrible.

    The actual Egyptians probably would've been down with it, tho.

    He'd end up giving his life for tourism

    Elvenshae
  • JedocJedoc Once to start a new life and once just to start a fireRegistered User regular
    I bet you're really not superstitious until you're alone in the lab after dark waiting for your computer to finish processing so it can talk to you in a dead man's voice.

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  • DouglasDangerDouglasDanger PennsylvaniaRegistered User regular
    I play games on ps3 and ps4. My PSN is DouglasDanger.
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  • TheStigTheStig Registered User regular
    Moriveth wrote: »
    They're just... real good friends, that's all!

    2wa6lk8kcsyc.jpg

    bnet: TheStig#1787 Steam: TheStig
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  • StraightziStraightzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User regular
    Can we please not try to not post homophobic things here

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  • TheStigTheStig Registered User regular
    edited January 25
    The joke is that click bait websites often jump to the conclusion of homosexuality whenever two men are depicted together in history. The articles sensationalize and exploit homosexuality for traffic and further cement the modern western belief that two men can't have any sort of affection for each other without being gay. It's the click bait websites that are homophobic.

    Can we not accuse me of being homophobic?

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  • StraightziStraightzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User regular
    Listen I am all about talking about the historic representations of sexuality, I think that while sexuality is heavily adjusted to a heteronormative curve in our retellings of history, immediately leaping to a modern conception of homosexuality is a potential overcorrection

    But boiling that down to "lol gay bois"?

    Nah, miss me with that

    Dee Kae
  • VeeveeVeevee WisconsinRegistered User regular
    edited January 26
    I think it might be time to agree to disagree and hug it out

    Veevee on
  • Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited January 26
    Also, given the context, 'could have been gay lovers' is about as tame and non-clickbaity as you can get

    like given how much non-cishet erasure has happened throughout history i don't think acknowledging that two men found embracing as they faced certain death might have been gay (or just lovers/romantically connected, to avoid modern labels) is particularly problematic

    Houk the Namebringer on
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  • SkeithSkeith Registered User regular
    edited January 26
    The Seattle branch of the National Archives has been sold to a housing developer. The records are to be moved to Riverside, CA and Kansas City, MI. This is illegal since the OMB has to engage local stakeholders before making a closure like that, which wasn't done, but it's not like this administration gives a shit about the law and the people in a position to enforce it are no better. That said, a number of Congressional Representatives and all the Senators from Alaska, Idaho, Washington, and Oregon sent a letter to the acting director of the OMB. We'll see what happens but I don't have much hope. The records that were moved from Anchorage when that branch of the National Archives was closed down wound up in Seattle, so those will end up even further afield. The knock on effect is that this will do a lot of damage to First Nations research and scholarship, because a lot of those records pertain to the tribes in the Pacific Northwest.

    Skeith on
    mts wrote: »
    heres how i see it being a total win situation for you
    1. stay with your wife while she dog sits. this wins husband points since she knows its out of your comfort zone
    2. have sex all over her friends house so that the next time you see her friend look at you condescendingly, you can wink back knowing you did the freaky deaky where she eats her cheerios.
  • valhalla130valhalla130 13 Dark Shield Perceives the GodsRegistered User regular
    We need an angry agree button.

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  • MayabirdMayabird Pecking at the keyboardRegistered User regular
    Reposted from D&D.


    Let's talk about something a bit lighter for a moment: a most incredibly ironically named cringe statue called Napoleon as Mars the Peacemaker.

    [NOT PICTURED: A NSFW double-life-size marble nude statue of Napoleon with attachable fig leaf over his crotch.]

    You can look it up if it won't get you in trouble and you want to for some reason. If you want to see it in person, it is located by a stairwell at Apsley House, the townhouse of the Dukes of Wellington.

    Wait, you might say, with ellipses. ...The Duke of Wellington, as in, like, Napoleon's nemesis? Why would he have a double-life-size marble nude statue of Napoleon in a prominent place in his house? For that answer, we need to go back to the beginning.

    Napoleon loved his propaganda. Everything from strict censorship on the press so only glowing reports were written about him to commissioning grand artistic works to glorify him in heroic ways.

    406px-Jacques_Louis_David_-_Bonaparte_franchissant_le_Grand_Saint-Bernard%2C_20_mai_1800_-_Google_Art_Project.jpg
    [PICTURED: Propaganda]

    So naturally, having lots of money and influence, he could hire the best of the best across Europe, including Antonio Canova, an Italian neoclassical sculptor considered one of the, if not the, best in the world. Canova was something of a Mozart of carving marble, building fine shrines before he hit double-digits in years and only going up from there.

    389px-Antonio_Canova_Selfportrait_1792.jpg
    [PICTURED: Canova's self-portrait, because why not be a great painter too?]

    Antonio Canova also HATED Napoleon. Loathed, held with contempt, detested Napoleon with all his being, for multiple reasons from political, religious, to artistic. He absolutely did not want to glorify Napoleon, but he also didn't want to martyr himself refusing a commission. He could do a terrible job, sure, but that would also insult his own pride and dignity; he would not compromise his principles which included his aesthetic and artistic ones. So...

    And so, after years of work, the statue was finally unveiled in Paris. Napoleon's head, but on a body of classical athletic beauty, holding an orb and staff and oh yeah his dick just hanging out right there at eye level since it was double-life-size. Crane your neck up to avoid Napoleon's ding-dong and you see this sculpted chest and body and don't really see the face. [I was unable to determine when exactly the detachable fig leaf was bundled with the statue; since it is very slightly too small to properly cover the junk and actually kinda makes it look even more ridiculous, I like to think that was Canova too.]

    Canova had done exactly, precisely, to the letter what he was commissioned to do. It's definitely a neoclassical statue built with Classical sensibilities and magnificently carved and sculpted and a heroic pose, giant-sized, and all the other things that he was supposed to do and did. More importantly though, it's just weird and awkward as all heck. It's Napoleon with his balls out. Of course it is, Canova could say. Neoclassical art is all about nudity for admiring the ideal human form. Why, he had done plenty of sculptures of nude figures.

    [NOT PICTURED: Lots of NSFW marble penises and breasts from Canova's previous works]

    Now sure, Canova was often a bit more subtle about the nudity than many of his contemporaries, but this wasn't supposed to be a subtle work, right? Napoleon wanted a big in-your-face propaganda statue, and it's big and it sure is in your face. The detachable fig leaf ensures that when you really need that in-your-face effect, you can get it full frontal!

    In response, Napoleon muttered something about the statue looking "too athletic" and had it tucked away from the public so no one would ever see it. The fact that Napoleon was getting a bit tubby probably worked as a good enough excuse so they need never mention it again. Canova got paid, did not get arrested, and generally Got Away With It.


    Fast forward a few years. After the Battle of Waterloo, the British army found itself in possession of a large number of looted artworks, as one does. There were negotiations afterwards with the new French government about returning artworks back to the Louvre.
    Britain: So...what about this double-life-size marble nude statue of Napoleon with detachable fig leaf? Want it back?
    France: Naw.

    So now the government of Britain finds itself in possession of this enormous, intentionally cringeworthy marble statue of a defeated enemy. What are they going to do with it?
    Britain: Hey, Duke of Wellington, you're a fan of Canova, right?
    Duke of Wellington: Certainly! Who isn't?
    Britain: Well then, in honour of your great services to God and His Majesty, here's an original Canova!
    Duke of Wellington: [presented with a double-life-size marble heroic nude statue of the guy he beat in battle by His Majesty's Government] ...I don't think I am allowed to refuse this.

    So what do you do when given such a grand gift by your government? Well, I guess you have to display it in your house, because that would be rude or something otherwise. The statue was so big and heavy that the floor needed to be reinforced to support it, and once it was placed by the stairwell - it's not like anyone was interested in trying to move the damn thing again. And thus it has stayed in Apsley House ever since.

    For many years, houseguests hung their umbrellas on the statue.


    Tl;dr No one wanted this.

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  • MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    I can only hope they hung their umbrellas on the dong

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