The Even Worse Joke Thread

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  • Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    I'd never made that connection 🤦‍♂️

    SporkAndrewTastyfishDisruptedCapitalist
  • TaminTamin Registered User regular
    while attempting to pick up some trash with my toes, I thought, I could admit defeat
    then I snared it and thought, but I would rather claim victory with defeat

    Rhesus PositiveElvenshaedavidsdurionsDisruptedCapitalistH3KnucklesSporkAndrewPolaritieexpendable
  • WiseManTobesWiseManTobes Registered User regular
    Make someone in your life mad with this

    "I bet you a dollar I can guess where you got your shoes"
    You got em on your feet

    Steam! Battlenet:Wisemantobes#1508
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  • MichaelLCMichaelLC In what furnace was thy brain? ChicagoRegistered User regular
    From Carrot Weather:

    What do farmers use to fix a pumpkin?
    A pumpkin patch
    .

    Echo wrote: »
    Something working on the first try is a source of great suspicion.
    Rhesus PositiveRingoJedoctzeentchlingH3KnucklesSporkAndrewToxPolaritieElvenshaejoshofalltradesdarunia106
  • BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    I was having trouble staying alert so I chugged a Monster earlier.

    Unfortunately now my taste buds have turned into taste bros.



    H3KnucklesJedocRingoDisruptedCapitalistsarukuntzeentchlingToxRhesus PositivePolaritieElvenshaeknitdanjoshofalltrades
  • facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    Yeah "Cluedo" is literally just a pun based on Ludo. That's it.

    The pun wouldn't work in America so here it's just Clue.

    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
  • The GeekThe Geek Oh-Two Crew, Omeganaut Registered User, ClubPA regular
    knitdan wrote: »
    I can’t recall if it’s the line “the game’s afoot” or “elementary, my dear Watson” or both that never appears in a Conan Doyle-authored Sherlock Holmes work.

    IIRC they come entirely from one of the TV or film adaptations and yet they are indelibly linked to the property now.

    BLM - ACAB
    davidsdurionsknitdanH3Knuckles
  • RingoRingo HE KEEPS REPEATING THE LINE I'M GONNA CRY BLEASE LET HIM LIVE YOU MADE ME WATCH SO MUCH KISSING IN THIS FILM LET INIGO LIVERegistered User regular
    My roommate's cat, Jinx. She's so cute and soft I enthusiastically greet her every day!
    SWh9xo7.jpg

    Hi, Jinx!

    KQmlpp2.jpg

    To which she says
    SHENANIGANS!

    Sterica wrote: »
    I know my last visit to my grandpa on his deathbed was to find out how the whole Nazi werewolf thing turned out.
    Edcrab's Exigency RPG
    ElvenshaechromdomironsizidetzeentchlingH3KnucklesTynnanRhesus PositivePolaritieDisruptedCapitalistMichaelLCexpendable
  • chr1sh4ll3ttb3chr1sh4ll3ttb3 A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    facetious wrote: »
    Yeah "Cluedo" is literally just a pun based on Ludo. That's it.

    The pun wouldn't work in America so here it's just Clue.

    These posts are giving me Cluedo narrative dissonance.

    H3KnucklesRhesus PositiveRanlinSporkAndrewdjmitchellaJedoc
  • Ark EvensongArk Evensong The NetherlandsRegistered User regular
    facetious wrote: »
    Yeah "Cluedo" is literally just a pun based on Ludo. That's it.

    The pun wouldn't work in America so here it's just Clue.

    These posts are giving me Cluedo narrative dissonance.

    Pretty sure that pun doesn't work over here in the Netherlands either, but that's our name for it too. Except, it's pronounced as Clu-edo, with three syllables. And it's only this thread that made me realize that isn't the case in English. Huh.

    Sorry, no bad joke here, unless you wanna talk about my country's mangling of loan words.

    honovere[Expletive deleted]
  • Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    As ludo is "I play" in Latin, board game manufacturers should have leant into it for all UK versions of board games

    Monopoludo
    Ludoperation
    Buckarudo
    Ludiplomacy

    H3KnucklesSporkAndrewvalhalla130facetious
  • honoverehonovere Registered User regular
    facetious wrote: »
    Yeah "Cluedo" is literally just a pun based on Ludo. That's it.

    The pun wouldn't work in America so here it's just Clue.

    These posts are giving me Cluedo narrative dissonance.

    Pretty sure that pun doesn't work over here in the Netherlands either, but that's our name for it too. Except, it's pronounced as Clu-edo, with three syllables. And it's only this thread that made me realize that isn't the case in English. Huh.

    Sorry, no bad joke here, unless you wanna talk about my country's mangling of loan words.

    same here in Germany

  • RingoRingo HE KEEPS REPEATING THE LINE I'M GONNA CRY BLEASE LET HIM LIVE YOU MADE ME WATCH SO MUCH KISSING IN THIS FILM LET INIGO LIVERegistered User regular
    English doesn't have problems with loan words only because they kidnap them, mangle them, and keep them forever

    Sterica wrote: »
    I know my last visit to my grandpa on his deathbed was to find out how the whole Nazi werewolf thing turned out.
    Edcrab's Exigency RPG
    ElvenshaeH3Knucklespimentovalhalla130joshofalltradestzeentchlingAngelHedgieironsizide
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    Virtually unrecognizable, it’s true.

  • Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    There's an article on my employer's intranet celebrating World Statistics Day entitled "Stats the way (I like it)"

    I want to meet them and kiss them on the mouth

    DisruptedCapitalistpimentoMichaelLCSporkAndrewjoshofalltradeschromdomtzeentchlingToxElvenshaejungleroomxironsizideRingoknitdanH3KnucklessarukunhonovereIvar
  • PolaritiePolaritie Sleepy Registered User regular
    There's an article on my employer's intranet celebrating World Statistics Day entitled "Stats the way (I like it)"

    I want to meet them and kiss them on the mouth

    Eh, you'll need to kiss more than them for a proper sample.

    Steam: Polaritie
    3DS: 0473-8507-2652
    Switch: SW-5185-4991-5118
    PSN: AbEntropy
    Rhesus PositivejoshofalltradesElvenshaeironsizidesarukun
  • The GeekThe Geek Oh-Two Crew, Omeganaut Registered User, ClubPA regular
    There's an article on my employer's intranet celebrating World Statistics Day entitled "Stats the way (I like it)"

    I want to meet them and kiss them on the mouth

    You may think that means you're some kind of original romantic but you're more of just a standard deviant.

    BLM - ACAB
    Rhesus PositiveJedocpimentoPolaritiejoshofalltradeschromdomToxElvenshaeDisruptedCapitalistironsizidechr1sh4ll3ttb3RingoknitdanH3KnucklessarukunJacques L'Homme
  • see317see317 Registered User regular
    edited October 20
    I saw a young boy crying by himself today, couldn't have been more than 3 or 4.
    I went up and asked him "What's wrong? Do you know where your parents are?"
    In response the young boy started crying even harder, big fat tears rolling down his cheeks.
    Anyway, that's how I got fired from the orphanage, how's your day been?

    see317 on
    Ringo wrote: »
    Well except what see317 said. That guy's always wrong.
    Rhesus PositivePolaritiejoshofalltradestzeentchlingToxdavidsdurionsElvenshaeironsizideRingoH3Knucklessarukunvalhalla130Jacques L'Homme
  • facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    I just realized the word "wholesome" is an oxymoron.

    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
    JedocdavidsdurionsElvenshaedestroyah87ironsizidePolaritieRingoMcFodderchromdomH3KnucklessarukunRhesus PositivejoshofalltradesJoolanderJacques L'Homme
  • facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    edited October 21
    Also today I was given a behind the scenes tour of my museum's static gallery museum by the woman who runs the operations. It recently reopened after a huge renovation and some exhibits are still yet to be installed. They were working on one gallery, and when one of my colleagues asked what was going in there, she said, "Clocks." After some discussion she added, "That's the one exhibit that has to be on time."

    (As per usual, this and my previous post are both true stories.)

    facetious on
    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
    JayKaosMichaelLCdestroyah87PolaritieRingodavidsdurionstzeentchlingH3KnucklessarukunSporkAndrewRhesus PositiveElvenshaejoshofalltradesvalhalla130expendableworksintheory
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    How do mathematicians scold their children?
    If I've told you n times, I've told you n+1 times...

    davidsdurionsElvenshaeH3KnucklesRingoRhesus Positivetzeentchlingknitdanchr1sh4ll3ttb3Jacques L'Hommeironsizidesarukun
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    Did you hear about the suicidal homeopath?

    He took 1/50th of the recommended dose.

    Rhesus PositiveSirToastychr1sh4ll3ttb3sarukun
  • Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    reminds me of

    The GeekH3Knucklesexpendable
  • BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    C3IBbH5.jpg



  • H3KnucklesH3Knuckles Jack of all interests... ...master of noneRegistered User regular
    edited October 28
    Aw, boo, the image was removed.

    H3Knuckles on
    If you're curious about my icon; it's an update of the early Lego Castle theme's "Black Falcons" faction.
    camo_sig2-400.png
    RingoDisruptedCapitalistRhesus PositiveBedlamElvenshae
  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    b09pv4kcm264.jpeg

    davidsdurionsBionicPenguinRhesus PositiveexpendableRingoBedlamsarukunTynnanToxH3Knucklesironsizide
  • BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    bvu24kq.jpeg

    4YoXGnj.jpg



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  • PinfeldorfPinfeldorf Realtor Santa ClaritaRegistered User regular
    The Dragon with the Girl Tattoo is a Bob's Burgers joke from like 2013!

  • TaminTamin Registered User regular
    edited 12:35PM
    AwP0bWy.jpg

    The book was published in 2010, so

    Tamin at
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