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David [Chat] Pumpkins

AiouaAioua Ora OccidensOra OptimaRegistered User regular
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rS00xWnqwvI

It's nearly Hallowe'en chat. That time of year when we gather around the campfire, and tell spooky stories of that demon of the night, David S. Pumpkins.

I heard he once followed a young couple into the woods and danced angrily at them for hours.

I heard he once hid under a child's bed, humming the theme song from Jaws.

I heard he once bought every pumpkin jacket available and resold them on ebay for a huge markup.

What have you heard about David S. Pumpkins?

life's a game that you're bound to lose / like using a hammer to pound in screws
fuck up once and you break your thumb / if you're happy at all then you're god damn dumb
that's right we're on a fucked up cruise / God is dead but at least we have booze
bad things happen, no one knows why / the sun burns out and everyone dies
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Posts

  • DoodmannDoodmann Registered User regular
    I'm going as the magic school bus.

    Whippy wrote: »
    nope nope nope nope abort abort talk about anime
    I like to ART
  • LudiousLudious I just wanted a sandwich A temporally dislocated QuiznosRegistered User regular
    I heard he beat a dead horse until it was more dead.

  • Desktop HippieDesktop Hippie Registered User regular
    @Orphane I was quoting that news post from memory. It will probably take me a while to find it.

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    I actually got a chick tract in Seattle at a dicks drive in. It was very weird.

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • VanguardVanguard But now the dream is over. And the insect is awake.Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    Ludious wrote: »
    I heard he beat a dead horse until it was more dead.

    i heard his real name was ludious

  • ChelleYeahChelleYeah Mrs. Ludious Living it up in Cinderella's CastleRegistered User regular
    another coworker quote of the day "the epa came out saying we had to change our standard of living to meet environmental guidelines. things like turn off our ac and refrigerators."

    of course i know where this is going because he is a climate change denier so i passively say
    "well hopefully they can just come out with technology to fix things" he says "its not worry about fixing things, its about control, they want to control everything we do."

    yes the epa wants you to turn off your refrigerator.

    I post Makeup stuff and Schnauzers on instagram.

    Ludious wrote: »
    I react like a dyslexic crash test dummy. Hit the wall then the brakes.
  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    owned @amateurhour

  • Evil MultifariousEvil Multifarious Registered User regular
    I thought the Pumpkins sketch was barely funny. It made it, but only just.

    There were better sketches from that episode for sure.

  • AiouaAioua Ora Occidens Ora OptimaRegistered User regular
    Ludious wrote: »
    I heard he beat a dead horse until it was more dead.

    it's only three days old, mang

    it's still breathing

    life's a game that you're bound to lose / like using a hammer to pound in screws
    fuck up once and you break your thumb / if you're happy at all then you're god damn dumb
    that's right we're on a fucked up cruise / God is dead but at least we have booze
    bad things happen, no one knows why / the sun burns out and everyone dies
  • IlpalaIlpala Just this guy, y'know TexasRegistered User regular
    I heard they had coworkers who have kooky conspiracy theories that don't even pass the "Even if they are actually doing this, how do they benefit?" test.

    FF XIV - Qih'to Furishu (on Siren), Battle.Net - Ilpala#1975
    Switch - SW-7373-3669-3011
    Fuck Joe Manchin
  • EchoEcho ski-bap ba-dapModerator mod
    Ludious wrote: »
    I heard he beat a dead horse until it was more dead.

    deadhorse.gif

  • Hahnsoo1Hahnsoo1 Make Ready. We Hunt.Registered User regular
    Vanguard wrote: »
    Ludious wrote: »
    I heard he beat a dead horse until it was more dead.

    i heard his real name was ludious
    But... how is Ludious still posting??

    SPOOPY!

    8i1dt37buh2m.png
  • LudiousLudious I just wanted a sandwich A temporally dislocated QuiznosRegistered User regular
    @Orphane I was quoting that news post from memory. It will probably take me a while to find it.

    *stares at finger nails*
    I didn't even really try very hard..

    https://www.penny-arcade.com/news/post/2010/09/10/the-eighth-attraction


    I guess google just likes me

  • SixSix Caches Tweets in the mainframe cyberhex Registered User regular
    @STATE OF THE ART ROBOT There's a dog costume contest in a park near us every year called The Great PUPkin and some of the costumes are nuts. Dogs in chariots being pulled by other dogs in horse armor, Star Wars dogs riding speeder bikes, etc. It's gotten so big that it takes hours to finish now because every dog gets to come up on stage as part of a parade.

    We took Archie once but we were totally outclassed.

    yOqaNz3.png

    can you feel the struggle within?
  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Wifes coworker is quitting meaning she'll have to take saturday shifts leaving me alone with ollie even more often. I love my job.

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • LudiousLudious I just wanted a sandwich A temporally dislocated QuiznosRegistered User regular
    Aioua wrote: »
    Ludious wrote: »
    I heard he beat a dead horse until it was more dead.

    it's only three days old, mang

    it's still breathing

    anything that chat posts more than 4 times is dead

    I don't make these rules

  • DoodmannDoodmann Registered User regular
    Six wrote: »
    @STATE OF THE ART ROBOT There's a dog costume contest in a park near us every year called The Great PUPkin and some of the costumes are nuts. Dogs in chariots being pulled by other dogs in horse armor, Star Wars dogs riding speeder bikes, etc. It's gotten so big that it takes hours to finish now because every dog gets to come up on stage as part of a parade.

    We took Archie once but we were totally outclassed.

    I assume he still won some kind of award for majesty right? That is one majestic looking pup.

    Whippy wrote: »
    nope nope nope nope abort abort talk about anime
    I like to ART
  • P10P10 An Idiot With Low IQ Registered User regular
    an SNL bit that's somewhat funny? a halloween miracle

    Shameful pursuits and utterly stupid opinions
  • SixSix Caches Tweets in the mainframe cyberhex Registered User regular
    Doodmann wrote: »
    Six wrote: »
    @STATE OF THE ART ROBOT There's a dog costume contest in a park near us every year called The Great PUPkin and some of the costumes are nuts. Dogs in chariots being pulled by other dogs in horse armor, Star Wars dogs riding speeder bikes, etc. It's gotten so big that it takes hours to finish now because every dog gets to come up on stage as part of a parade.

    We took Archie once but we were totally outclassed.

    I assume he still won some kind of award for majesty right? That is one majestic looking pup.

    The best compliment we got that day was that he looked "creepily human."

    I think it was the little overalls.

    can you feel the struggle within?
  • amateurhouramateurhour One day I'll be professionalhour The woods somewhere in TennesseeRegistered User regular
    Dude the porn companies had Nailin Palin out like half way through the elections.

    Why don't we have "Erection 2016: Make America Fellate Again! Starring The Dongald and Cliton"

    are YOU on the beer list?
  • emnmnmeemnmnme Registered User regular
    ChelleYeah wrote: »
    another coworker quote of the day "the epa came out saying we had to change our standard of living to meet environmental guidelines. things like turn off our ac and refrigerators."

    of course i know where this is going because he is a climate change denier so i passively say
    "well hopefully they can just come out with technology to fix things" he says "its not worry about fixing things, its about control, they want to control everything we do."

    yes the epa wants you to turn off your refrigerator.

    Actually, I found a proposal by the EPA to ban all non-Energy Star appliances by 2019.

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Because no one is sexually attracted to either candidate

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • SixSix Caches Tweets in the mainframe cyberhex Registered User regular
    Preacher wrote: »
    Because no one is sexually attracted to either candidate

    Does Kate McKinnon's Hillary count?

    can you feel the struggle within?
  • wanderingwandering Russia state-affiliated media Registered User regular
    The best chick tract is the one R. Crumb did

    6h0zgDL.jpg

  • P10P10 An Idiot With Low IQ Registered User regular
    Dude the porn companies had Nailin Palin out like half way through the elections.

    Why don't we have "Erection 2016: Make America Fellate Again! Starring The Dongald and Cliton"
    no one needs that image in their head

    Shameful pursuits and utterly stupid opinions
  • ChanusChanus Harbinger of the Spicy Rooster Apocalypse The Flames of a Thousand Collapsed StarsRegistered User regular
    emnmnme wrote: »
    ChelleYeah wrote: »
    another coworker quote of the day "the epa came out saying we had to change our standard of living to meet environmental guidelines. things like turn off our ac and refrigerators."

    of course i know where this is going because he is a climate change denier so i passively say
    "well hopefully they can just come out with technology to fix things" he says "its not worry about fixing things, its about control, they want to control everything we do."

    yes the epa wants you to turn off your refrigerator.

    Actually, I found a proposal by the EPA to ban all non-Energy Star appliances by 2019.

    hey thats like totally the same thing

    Allegedly a voice of reason.
  • Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    emnmnme wrote: »
    ChelleYeah wrote: »
    another coworker quote of the day "the epa came out saying we had to change our standard of living to meet environmental guidelines. things like turn off our ac and refrigerators."

    of course i know where this is going because he is a climate change denier so i passively say
    "well hopefully they can just come out with technology to fix things" he says "its not worry about fixing things, its about control, they want to control everything we do."

    yes the epa wants you to turn off your refrigerator.

    Actually, I found a proposal by the EPA to ban all non-Energy Star appliances by 2019.

    without clicking the link, the typical way EPA goes about this stuff is banning new sales and letting the products phase out

    they aren't gonna go to any houses and start turning off AC and refrigerators

    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
  • matt has a problemmatt has a problem Points to 'off' Points to 'on'Registered User regular
    P10 wrote: »
    Dude the porn companies had Nailin Palin out like half way through the elections.

    Why don't we have "Erection 2016: Make America Fellate Again! Starring The Dongald and Cliton"
    no one needs that image in their head

    Entire nation goes blind. Pornography companies all bankrupted.

    nibXTE7.png
  • Grape ApeGrape Ape Registered User regular
    Aioua wrote: »
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rS00xWnqwvI

    It's nearly Hallowe'en chat. That time of year when we gather around the campfire, and tell spooky stories of that demon of the night, David S. Pumpkins.

    I heard he once followed a young couple into the woods and danced angrily at them for hours.

    I heard he once hid under a child's bed, humming the theme song from Jaws.

    I heard he once bought every pumpkin jacket available and resold them on ebay for a huge markup.

    What have you heard about David S. Pumpkins?

    I am deep in the weeds on [chat]

  • Desktop HippieDesktop Hippie Registered User regular
    Ludious wrote: »
    @Orphane I was quoting that news post from memory. It will probably take me a while to find it.

    *stares at finger nails*
    I didn't even really try very hard..

    https://www.penny-arcade.com/news/post/2010/09/10/the-eighth-attraction


    I guess google just likes me

    I had just found it. I bow to your superior Google-Fu!

  • Donkey KongDonkey Kong Putting Nintendo out of business with AI nips Registered User regular
    I thought the Pumpkins sketch was barely funny. It made it, but only just.

    There were better sketches from that episode for sure.

    Black Jeopardy was perfect. Good premise, didn't overstay, ended on two outstanding jokes.

    Thousands of hot, local singles are waiting to play at bubbulon.com.
  • emnmnmeemnmnme Registered User regular
    without clicking the link,

    ...
    ...................................................

  • BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    @Thomamelas

    Remembering they ought to at least test it on dry land first is admittedly more responsibility and safety-consciousness than I assumed the post-war military would bother with.

  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    wandering wrote: »
    The best chick tract is the one R. Crumb did

    6h0zgDL.jpg

    There must be some misunderstanding

  • milskimilski Poyo! Registered User regular
    Dude the porn companies had Nailin Palin out like half way through the elections.

    Why don't we have "Erection 2016: Make America Fellate Again! Starring The Dongald and Cliton"

    So yeah I got linked election themed Rule 34 and let me tell you your best guess is not going to be as bad as it was.

    I ate an engineer
  • DoodmannDoodmann Registered User regular
    I'm listening to a podcast talking about the new federal overtime rules.

    "Its a problem for broadcasters because out culture is such that sometimes you work 60-90 hours"

    Hey, guess what, your culture sucks. You should be getting overtime, or not working 40 hours.

    Jesus why is anyone other than greedy fucks against this. Yes, you're going to have to figure out how to make this work, but thats because the current system is fucked.

    Whippy wrote: »
    nope nope nope nope abort abort talk about anime
    I like to ART
  • ChanusChanus Harbinger of the Spicy Rooster Apocalypse The Flames of a Thousand Collapsed StarsRegistered User regular
    Grape Ape wrote: »
    Aioua wrote: »
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rS00xWnqwvI

    It's nearly Hallowe'en chat. That time of year when we gather around the campfire, and tell spooky stories of that demon of the night, David S. Pumpkins.

    I heard he once followed a young couple into the woods and danced angrily at them for hours.

    I heard he once hid under a child's bed, humming the theme song from Jaws.

    I heard he once bought every pumpkin jacket available and resold them on ebay for a huge markup.

    What have you heard about David S. Pumpkins?

    I am deep in the weeds on [chat]

    you know how like [chat] will latch onto something that is kind of good and then drive it into the ground and then salt the earth behind us?

    Allegedly a voice of reason.
  • amateurhouramateurhour One day I'll be professionalhour The woods somewhere in TennesseeRegistered User regular
    I heard David S. Pumpkins likes to scream right before something happens in a scary movie so that you miss it every time.

    are YOU on the beer list?
  • IlpalaIlpala Just this guy, y'know TexasRegistered User regular
    milski wrote: »
    Dude the porn companies had Nailin Palin out like half way through the elections.

    Why don't we have "Erection 2016: Make America Fellate Again! Starring The Dongald and Cliton"

    So yeah I got linked election themed Rule 34 and let me tell you your best guess is not going to be as bad as it was.

    There are some days I fondly wish for the cleansing fire.

    FF XIV - Qih'to Furishu (on Siren), Battle.Net - Ilpala#1975
    Switch - SW-7373-3669-3011
    Fuck Joe Manchin
  • Grape ApeGrape Ape Registered User regular
    milski wrote: »
    Dude the porn companies had Nailin Palin out like half way through the elections.

    Why don't we have "Erection 2016: Make America Fellate Again! Starring The Dongald and Cliton"

    So yeah I got linked election themed Rule 34 and let me tell you your best guess is not going to be as bad as it was.

    Pence/Kaine with Ted Cruz as the intrusive cameraguy?

This discussion has been closed.