As was foretold, we've added advertisements to the forums! If you have questions, or if you encounter any bugs, please visit this thread: https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/240191/forum-advertisement-faq-and-reports-thread/
Options

[Bad Food Thread] How To Cook Durian For Forty Humans

18081838586101

Posts

  • Options
    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    Yeah, they're like, crazy delicious.

    The best part about durian pizza is, you know how durian makes you burp like whoa after you eat it? (Seriously this is the reason I don't eat durian all the time now that I know it's amazing.) Well the durian they use on the pizza has been like processed or something. No burps! No bad breath! IT'S A MIRACLE FOOD, SARUKUN.

    RUVCwyu.jpg
    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
  • Options
    knitdanknitdan In ur base Killin ur guysRegistered User regular
    You are an insane woman

    “I was quick when I came in here, I’m twice as quick now”
    -Indiana Solo, runner of blades
  • Options
    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Yeah, they're like, crazy delicious.

    The best part about durian pizza is, you know how durian makes you burp like whoa after you eat it? (Seriously this is the reason I don't eat durian all the time now that I know it's amazing.) Well the durian they use on the pizza has been like processed or something. No burps! No bad breath! IT'S A MIRACLE FOOD, SARUKUN.

    I'm coming to singapore specifically for this.

  • Options
    #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited September 2017
    Inquisitor wrote: »
    I tried Egg Slut earlier this week and it was very disappointing. I got their egg sandwich. It was mostly bread with a little bacon and one egg on it. One egg! THAT'S HARDLY SLUTTY, GEEZE.

    which sandwich did you get? The Fairfax is the most popular one and it doesn't have bacon. And personally I wouldn't be able to look past this sandwich which now that I look doesn't even seem to be on the menu???
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PQe9hnkCDTQ

    #pipe on
  • Options
    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Sandra I do not believe you

    this is a trap

  • Options
    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    I'm not lying! Why would I lie! I was VERY RETICENT to try it!

    I mean if you dislike durian in the first place, caveat emptor, but if you like it except for the post-consumption durian burps/breath... Durian frickin' pizza!

    Also Nic, I'm in Shenzhen right now, so I am not 100% sure if it's gonna be the same in Singers.

    RUVCwyu.jpg
    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
  • Options
    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    I'm not lying! Why would I lie! I was VERY RETICENT to try it!

    I mean if you dislike durian in the first place, caveat emptor, but if you like it except for the post-consumption durian burps/breath... Durian frickin' pizza!

    Also Nic, I'm in Shenzhen right now, so I am not 100% sure if it's gonna be the same in Singers.

    aww
    I doubt I'll be in in Shenzhen in the foreseeable future so i'll just have to make some

  • Options
    NightDragonNightDragon 6th Grade Username Registered User regular
    I've heard so many things about durian over the years now that I feel I have to try it.

    This will be extra fun since I have Oral Allergy Syndrome and will probably end up being allergic to it

    But lo, my curiosity must be sated

  • Options
    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
  • Options
    NightDragonNightDragon 6th Grade Username Registered User regular
    The problem is they're also SO FRICKIN BIG. That's a goddamn commitment to a tasting trial. And what if I don't like it?? Or if I'm allergic to it?? I can't throw out perfectly good food - that's illegal.

  • Options
    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Make icecream out of the leftovers.

  • Options
    NightDragonNightDragon 6th Grade Username Registered User regular
    mmmmm allergy sweets

  • Options
    KetarKetar Come on upstairs we're having a partyRegistered User regular
    The problem is they're also SO FRICKIN BIG. That's a goddamn commitment to a tasting trial. And what if I don't like it?? Or if I'm allergic to it?? I can't throw out perfectly good food - that's illegal.

    Find an Asian bakery or restaurant that makes durian desserts or shakes to try it first. I can think of a few Thai and Chinese places in Chicago that do it. Maybe one Vietnamese too. There have to be some in Boston that do as well.

  • Options
    KetarKetar Come on upstairs we're having a partyRegistered User regular
    Also, durian definitely tastes better than it smells.

  • Options
    MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    Considering taste is linked to smell, and I know that I can't eat goat cheese, I also know I'd never be able to down a durian.

  • Options
    KetarKetar Come on upstairs we're having a partyRegistered User regular
    Madican wrote: »
    Considering taste is linked to smell, and I know that I can't eat goat cheese, I also know I'd never be able to down a durian.

    That's where finding a place that makes a dessert with it is key. The smell is far less of an issue in a prepared dessert.

  • Options
    King RiptorKing Riptor Registered User regular
    We got durian in at my job once for a demo. The smell was hideous and they hadn't even cut it yet. The flesh's texture was like cream cheese vomit and I had to leave at that point because I think I would have thrown up my intestines had I stayed

    I have a podcast now. It's about video games and anime!Find it here.
  • Options
    BrainleechBrainleech 機知に富んだコメントはここにあります Registered User regular
    Ketar wrote: »
    Also, durian definitely tastes better than it smells.

    I still find it funny in New Leaf when one of the animals gave me a durian I went and looked it up as I had no idea what it was
    I heard of them just I never made the contection

  • Options
    sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    I'm not lying! Why would I lie! I was VERY RETICENT to try it!

    I mean if you dislike durian in the first place, caveat emptor, but if you like it except for the post-consumption durian burps/breath... Durian frickin' pizza!

    Also Nic, I'm in Shenzhen right now, so I am not 100% sure if it's gonna be the same in Singers.

    I just don't even care.

    Ain't nobody trying' to get sloppy smooches off this face, I'ma eat what I want.

  • Options
    PinfeldorfPinfeldorf Yeah ZestRegistered User regular
    edited September 2017
    Someone at work brought it some durian cookies and I swear to Christ it smelled like a shit took a fart. The smell pervaded my sinuses like a liquid and I smelled it for hours afterwards every time I took in a deep breath. I want no more exposure to that fruit for the remainder of my life.

    Pinfeldorf on
  • Options
    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    i still think about the durian flavoured coconut candies i got when I went to vietnam 3 or 4 years back

    good stuff

  • Options
    bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Ketar wrote: »
    Also, durian definitely tastes better than it smells.

    Probably a genetic component like cilantro, for those repulsed by it.

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • Options
    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    Ketar wrote: »
    Madican wrote: »
    Considering taste is linked to smell, and I know that I can't eat goat cheese, I also know I'd never be able to down a durian.

    That's where finding a place that makes a dessert with it is key. The smell is far less of an issue in a prepared dessert.

    Oooh so...

    Ymmv here, kids.

    Every durian dessert I've tried, except for fresh durian covered in coconut skin, I've found ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING.

    That's why I was really reluctant to try the real deal. Good news! The real deal is totally different and delicious.

    RUVCwyu.jpg
    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
  • Options
    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    I did have a decentish bite of a snowskin mooncake with durian filling last week though.

    RUVCwyu.jpg
    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
  • Options
    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    At least a fresh durian has the decency to smell like it is up front.

    Durian desserts are just liars pretending to be something pleasant until its too late.

  • Options
    MadEddyMadEddy Creepy house watching youRegistered User regular
    The first person to eat a durian must have been so hungry. Or maybe anosmic.

    ruby-red-sig.jpg
  • Options
    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    But fresh durian is so tasty...

    RUVCwyu.jpg
    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
  • Options
    LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    one of my local grocers sells whole durians and i kinda want to buy one, but i feel like my housemates wouldn't forgive me

  • Options
    bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Near as I can tell durian is one of those polarizing things.

    The smell has almost nothing to do with the taste for the people who love it, there's something they can taste that overwhelms the smell.

    I wonder as a super taster how I'd fare with it, I'd be interested in trying it.

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • Options
    VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    edited September 2017
    MadEddy wrote: »
    The first person to eat a durian must have been so hungry. Or maybe anosmic.

    9And lo, the LORD did look upon the fruit, and was pleased, and bade Adam partake.
    10When Adam had received the fruit, he was vexed greatly, for the spines thereof were numerous and a terrible savour gathered.
    11Adam cried unto the LORD "Surely no man would take such evil into himself, lest he die"
    12The LORD's wrath grew hot against Adam, and he smote the fruit in twain.
    13But Adam did fear the LORD, and did partake of the fruit before him.
    14And Adam did find pleasure in the fruit, and sang praises unto the LORD, and he named the fruit Durian, for it is the King of Fruits.
    15And the LORD was like "haha gross"

    Veldrin on
  • Options
    NaphtaliNaphtali Hazy + Flow SeaRegistered User regular
    But fresh durian is so tasty...

    I'm thinking this was the problem with the durian pizza I had in china last year. The durian must have been off, but with that smell how can you tell?

    Steam | Nintendo ID: Naphtali | Wish List
  • Options
    Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    Shrug!

    I don't even think it usually smells that unpleasant. Just strong.

    I guess end of the story for me is, everyone should try durian once! Start with the fresh thing imo and branch out to other stuff if you enjoy it.

    My ratings so far from best to worst:
    Durian
    Durian pizza
    Fresh durian with coconut skin
    Durian snowskin mooncake
    Durian ice cream
    Durian candy
    Durian kueh

    RUVCwyu.jpg
    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
  • Options
    The Escape GoatThe Escape Goat incorrigible ruminant they/themRegistered User regular
    oh yeah, I also tried steak 'n shake for the first time today

    unbelievably better than five guys tbh

    Now that I'm properly awake, a little more on this:

    I tried the Garlic Steakburger, which was neat in that by default it came without all the unnecessary stuff people throw on burgers. Bun, garlic sauce, cheese, burger, that's it. The meat was thin, but that's why it defaults to a double patty, and notably the buns were a really good approximation of good garlic bread. And it was a great sort of juicy, which Five Guys hasn't been in my experience. Although it definitely looked like the sort of establishment where quality would vary a lot between locations, I just happened to hit up a good one. It's not Shake Shack level but probably the closest I'll be getting as a fast food burg 'round here.

    As to Five Guys, I think I'm just going to start getting the hotdogs from now on. The more I've had the burgers the less I've liked them.

    9uiytxaqj2j0.jpg
  • Options
    Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Registered User regular
  • Options
    ShortyShorty touching the meat Intergalactic Cool CourtRegistered User regular
    I'm already certain I can't eat durian, very strong and rich foods are tough for me

    I can't even eat very strong cheese on its own without a cracker and some jam

  • Options
    Raw ConcreteRaw Concrete Registered User regular
    I suck at the photoshops or there'd be a picture of Lex Luthor with 40 durian pizzas to go with the thread title.

    Oh, come and shake me 'till I'm dry
  • Options
    tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Shorty wrote: »
    I'm already certain I can't eat durian, very strong and rich foods are tough for me

    I can't even eat very strong cheese on its own without a cracker and some jam

    Durian tastes pretty mild.

  • Options
    ShortyShorty touching the meat Intergalactic Cool CourtRegistered User regular
    I've never heard it described that way

  • Options
    bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    edited September 2017
    It smells like a moldy butthole but tastes like a nice clean butt (I have no idea what it tastes like)

    bowen on
    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • Options
    V1mV1m Registered User regular
    Also for some reason sourdough toast is better than any other kind. It's not even the flavour, it just *toasts* really well.
    Lalabox wrote: »
    one of my local grocers sells whole durians and i kinda want to buy one, but i feel like my housemates wouldn't forgive me

    Just buy more durians until they plea for mercy. Let them hate, as long as they fear.

This discussion has been closed.