Stop me if you've heard this one before...

BoredGamer

bsjezz wrote: »

BoredGamer wrote: »

bsjezz wrote: »

quick! i need an italian

it is a matter of artistic emergency

Yes? What is it?

okay a character of mine has done a painting

it has to have an italian title and it has to be something to do with "the woman / lady / bella (her name is isabella) beside me" or next to me or in close proximity or whatever

but it has to sound beautiful, and roll off the tongue well

google language tools is pretty horrible at the aesthetics of the thing

Well...the correct translation of "The lady beside me" is "La signora al lato di me". I can't remember much Italian though, so sorry if it's not much help. Your best bet would be looking up an online language converter.

bsjezz

BoredGamer wrote: »

bsjezz wrote: »

BoredGamer wrote: »

bsjezz wrote: »

quick! i need an italian

it is a matter of artistic emergency

Yes? What is it?

okay a character of mine has done a painting

it has to have an italian title and it has to be something to do with "the woman / lady / bella (her name is isabella) beside me" or next to me or in close proximity or whatever

but it has to sound beautiful, and roll off the tongue well

google language tools is pretty horrible at the aesthetics of the thing

Well...the correct translation of "The lady beside me" is "La signora al lato di me". I can't remember much Italian though, so sorry if it's not much help. Your best bet would be looking up an online language converter.

what kind of half-arsed italian are you anyway!

it's all good, cheers for your help

BoredGamer

bsjezz wrote: »

BoredGamer wrote: »

bsjezz wrote: »

BoredGamer wrote: »

bsjezz wrote: »

quick! i need an italian

it is a matter of artistic emergency

Yes? What is it?

okay a character of mine has done a painting

it has to have an italian title and it has to be something to do with "the woman / lady / bella (her name is isabella) beside me" or next to me or in close proximity or whatever

but it has to sound beautiful, and roll off the tongue well

google language tools is pretty horrible at the aesthetics of the thing

Well...the correct translation of "The lady beside me" is "La signora al lato di me". I can't remember much Italian though, so sorry if it's not much help. Your best bet would be looking up an online language converter.

what kind of half-arsed italian are you anyway!

it's all good, cheers for your help

Not Italian, just know a bit. And could probably cut off the end of the sentence and have it as "La signora al lato" Without anyone really noticing or caring.

#pipe

Hey grug, when's Brispax?

I'm picturing you, me and cat sitting in a big room filled with half inflated balloons, shifting uncomfortably

Wise_a

Girlfriend in a coma I know, I know its serious

Wise_a

Bye Bye baby, Bye bye baby goodbye

Wise_a

Do you really think she'll pull through?

Wise_a

Girlfriend in a coma I know, I know its really seriousssssss

#pipe

boo

Wise_a

I wanted to see how many times I could get my posts next to each other there. Nobody loves Morrissey. He's unloved.

bsjezz

#pipe wrote: »

Hey grug, when's Brispax?

I'm picturing you, me and cat sitting in a big room filled with half inflated balloons, shifting uncomfortably

how about we meet halfway for a Coffs pax

we can have banana milkshakes and drink whiskey in the worst motel in Australia

BoredGamer

Wise_a wrote: »

Girlfriend in a coma I know, I know its really seriousssssss

http://www.morrisseydance.com/

#pipe

bsjezz wrote: »

#pipe wrote: »

Hey grug, when's Brispax?

I'm picturing you, me and cat sitting in a big room filled with half inflated balloons, shifting uncomfortably

how about we meet halfway for a Coffs pax

we can have banana milkshakes and drink whiskey in the worst motel in Australia

man, fuck coffs.

the big banana aint even that big.

seriously coffs can take a running jump at itself.

bsjezz

#pipe wrote: »

bsjezz wrote: »

#pipe wrote: »

Hey grug, when's Brispax?

I'm picturing you, me and cat sitting in a big room filled with half inflated balloons, shifting uncomfortably

how about we meet halfway for a Coffs pax

we can have banana milkshakes and drink whiskey in the worst motel in Australia

man, fuck coffs.

the big banana aint even that big.

seriously coffs can take a running jump at itself.

yeah well its negative nancies like you who lead to the disaster that was the big banana theme park. we could be riding banana-themed rollercoasters if it wasn't for you morons

#pipe

I'm a bitter dude, I'm sorry, I've got low bloodsugar

fuck coffs

bsjezz

[url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Banana]Wikipedia[/url] wrote:

Especially the artificial ski slope competes with ski areas in New Zealand for visitor numbers and popularity. Whilst the locals describe it as being rather 'tacky'.

Wait is that right

#pipe

ha ha ha what

The large recreational facilities attached to the statue are statistically measured the most popular leisure facilities on the Australian East Coast.

that's not right at all

Butters

The title implies a joke thread. This should be a joke thread.

bsjezz

#pipe wrote: »

ha ha ha what

The large recreational facilities attached to the statue are statistically measured the most popular leisure facilities on the Australian East Coast.

that's not right at all

strangely enough an article from 'the age' suggests that the place really does have a ski hill

maybe they just wiki'd their research

hilarious

#pipe

Butters wrote: »

The title implies a joke thread. This should be a joke thread.

that's exactly what I was thinking.

for some reason I've only been able to remember super racist jokes recently.

but I think people who tell jokes in regular conversation are stupid.

Butters

So Dracula walks into a bar and orders a cup of hot water. The bartender complies and Dracula pulls out a used tampon and starts to dip it in the water. The Bartender asks, "What are you doing?" Dracula says, "I'm making tea."

Wise_a

#pipe wrote: »

Butters wrote: »

The title implies a joke thread. This should be a joke thread.

that's exactly what I was thinking.

for some reason I've only been able to remember super racist jokes recently.

but I think people who tell jokes in regular conversation are stupid.

This is true. I hate people who ask "Hey, did you hear the one about..." I stay as far away from those people as possible. Its ok to be funny and make jokes and shit, but not reciting jokes that other people made up. Thats why we have Carlos Mencia.

lostwords

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

Dam.

ba-dum-psh.

For some reason, I love silly, stupid jokes like that. I r dum

<3

wtf is going on here?

bsjezz

so this guy is walking along the street and he meets a beautiful woman. he's all like<3 "what's your name?"

and the lady says "daisy, because when i was born a daisy petal floated in from the window of the hospital ward and landed softly on my forehead."

he's like bye! then he meets an even prettier woman and he's all like again, "what's your name?"

"my name's rose, because when i was born a rose petal fell from a beautiful boquet and landed on my cheek."

"great," he says and goes along his merry way. then he meets probably the ugliest girl he's ever seen, and is all like :shock:

"What's your name?" he asks

"fridge" she says

Wise_a

As7

Ever notice that all those cult leaders look like they know what they are spewing is total bull?

Defender

They always get this little smirk right after they talk about how you should kill yourself to join the aliens in heaven.

lostwords

I like the cult leaders that are in it to score with as many chicks as possible and to get money from dumb people. They're not crazy, they're just living the american dream. The ones who actually believe what they're talking about are the ones that are scary as hell.

Defender

HOLY FUCK THIS GUY IS UGLY AS SHIT IT LOOKS LIKE HE JUST GOT PUNCHED IN HE FACE RIGHT AS THE PICTURE WAS BEING TAKEN JESUS CHRIST

Butters

A man walks into his son's room and tells him "You know, kiddo, you keep masturbating and you're gonna go blind!"

The son replies, "I'm over here, dad!"

Ruckus

After a long night, the last call for one particular RCMP officer was a car accident on the highway. So he's writing notes, and comes across the head of one of the victims:

*writing*
"Head of driver, car 2, located approximately 20 feet away, 12 inches from the b-u-l-i... b-o-u-l-e..."

<_<

>_>

*Thwack*

"Head of driver, car 2, located approximately 20 feet away, 3 feet in the ditch."

#pipe

Wise_a wrote: »

Defender

lostwords wrote: »

I like the cult leaders that are in it to score with as many chicks as possible and to get money from dumb people. They're not crazy, they're just living the american dream. The ones who actually believe what they're talking about are the ones that are scary as hell.

Although sometimes they're weeeiiiiird about it and just marry like a dozen 9-year-olds.

That's not the American Dream. The American Dream is, maybe, to get double-teamed by 18-year-olds. But a dozen 9-year-olds? That's retarded. That's not even the Dutch Dream.

Defender

Butters wrote: »

A man walks into his son's room and tells him "You know, kiddo, you keep masturbating and you're gonna go blind!"

The son replies, "I'm over here, dad!"

I never got how that "masturbation makes you go blind and grow hairy palms" thing got perpetuated. I mean, every single man who has a son KNOWS FOR A FACT that it's bullshit. Why would you let your kid believe that garbage?

As7

Defender wrote: »

Butters wrote: »

A man walks into his son's room and tells him "You know, kiddo, you keep masturbating and you're gonna go blind!"

The son replies, "I'm over here, dad!"

I never got how that "masturbation makes you go blind and grow hairy palms" thing got perpetuated. I mean, every single man who has a son KNOWS FOR A FACT that it's bullshit. Why would you let your kid believe that garbage?

It was them WOMEN that did it. Always trying to stifle a mans self pleasure.

You know...hairy palms might not feel half bad...

Callius

Defender wrote: »

I never got how that "masturbation makes you go blind and grow hairy palms" thing got perpetuated. I mean, every single man who has a son KNOWS FOR A FACT that it's bullshit. Why would you let your kid believe that garbage?

lostwords

Arsenic7 wrote: »

Defender wrote: »

Butters wrote: »

A man walks into his son's room and tells him "You know, kiddo, you keep masturbating and you're gonna go blind!"

The son replies, "I'm over here, dad!"

I never got how that "masturbation makes you go blind and grow hairy palms" thing got perpetuated. I mean, every single man who has a son KNOWS FOR A FACT that it's bullshit. Why would you let your kid believe that garbage?

It was them WOMEN that did it. Always trying to stifle a mans self pleasure.

You know...hairy palms might not feel half bad...

silly boy, a man's palms shouldn't cook or clean. So why would women feel competition there?

As7

That's right, Jesus...just a little lower.

#pipe

oh my god.

look at his blank glare.