As was foretold, we've added advertisements to the forums! If you have questions, or if you encounter any bugs, please visit this thread: https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/240191/forum-advertisement-faq-and-reports-thread/
We're funding a new Acquisitions Incorporated series on Kickstarter right now! Check it out at https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/pennyarcade/acquisitions-incorporated-the-series-2

How do you wash your hands?

24

Posts

  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Soap on dry hands, rinse.
    Man, I suddenly feel like I fell through some sort of time portal

  • KetBraKetBra Dressed Ridiculously Registered User regular
    Larlar
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    KetBra wrote: »
    Also, people who pad their toilet seats and then just leave that shit sitting there after they leave are the wooooorst people ever

    Even worse than people who deliberately piss on the toilet seat?

    Those people are animals who have accidentally been allowed into the bathroom.

    KGMvDLc.jpg?1
    Duke 2.0
  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    One time here at work I found that someone had taken a messy dump in the toilet, not flushed, and also left several shit-encrusted bits of toilet paper around the toilet.

  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    Moriveth wrote: »
    One time here at work I found that someone had taken a messy dump in the toilet, not flushed, and also left several shit-encrusted bits of toilet paper around the toilet.

    what else are you supposed to do when there's no trash bin to throw your shit paper into

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • NightDragonNightDragon 6th Grade Username Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    It's the same way that I wash dishes - water on them first, then the dish soap (or, more usually, dish soap on a damp sponge, rather than directly on a surface).

    Concentrated soaps on dry surfaces can be a bit harder to remove. They seem to really cling to the surface, which can be a bit annoying.

    Also yeah, wet toothbrush prior to toothpaste person checking in

    ASimPersonDronus86Stilts
  • KetBraKetBra Dressed Ridiculously Registered User regular
    Larlar
    Hello, geneva?

    Yes, I would like to report bowen for committing bathroom crimes.

    KGMvDLc.jpg?1
    bowenPeenDuke 2.0Romanian My EscutcheonNothingDonovan Puppyfucker
  • UnbrokenEvaUnbrokenEva HIGH ON THE WIRE BUT I WON'T TRIP ITRegistered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    Someone on the finance department at my work used to use, with no exaggeration, at least 6 feet of paper towel whenever they used the toilet. That's not a mistake, paper towel, not toilet paper.

    I'm not sure what they were using it for, just that the toilet in the shared bathroom would be full of paper towel that either they didn't flush, or couldn't, blocking it up until maintenance could clear it out

  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Soap on dry hands, rinse.
    In some countries it's actually pretty common to have old piping which can't handle toilet paper

    So people there put any used toilet paper in the bin

    It's really gross but oh well

    bowenDuke 2.0tynicMadEddyGrobianMuddy Water
  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    how can you not wet a toothbrush before putting toothpaste on

    it's so uncomfortable, like nails on a chalkboard almost

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
    Muddy Water
  • PLAPLA The process.Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    I don't touch things with wet hands.

  • jgeisjgeis Registered User regular
    In my sophomore year of college I wrote a paper about medical/health information in the bible (for a Bible as Literature class) and learned that before germ theory had been proven a lot of doctors would go around doing surgeries and delivering babies back to back while rinsing off their hands in a single big bowl of water and they were really at a loss for why so many babies dying in infancy and people not surviving otherwise successful surgeries.

    And like, at first I was like "Well no shit they died" but then I was like "holy fuck that must have been frustrating" because they just didn't know.

  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    have you guys ever been over at a friends house and went to wash your hands and then go to dry them off and it's clearly a towel they use to shower with and you just freeze with "oh no what do I do now" ?

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
    IronKnuckle's GhostDronus86
  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Soap on dry hands, rinse.
    In some countries it's actually pretty common to have old piping which can't handle toilet paper

    So people there put any used toilet paper in the bin

    It's really gross but oh well

    Even when you flush it down, toilet paper itself can be really gross to people from other cultures which predominantly use water

  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    Soap on dry hands, rinse.
    bowen wrote: »
    have you guys ever been over at a friends house and went to wash your hands and then go to dry them off and it's clearly a towel they use to shower with and you just freeze with "oh no what do I do now" ?

    I lack hand towels

    I also didn't know that some people have decorative towels that aren't intended for use

    basically I grew up used to grabbing the first threadbare towel that came to hand, or rooting around for one in the airing cupboard that may or may not be covered in cat hair (because the cat was permitted to nap in the airing cupboard where all the clean clothes were stored), so my towel etiquette is not up to par

    bowen
  • Magic PinkMagic Pink Tur-Boner-Fed Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    it's actually EXTREMELY easy to pee and not touch Mr. Johnson even once. That ain't even a thing.

    Why should one avoid anti-bacterial soap tho?

  • NightDragonNightDragon 6th Grade Username Registered User regular
    edited November 2017
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    bowen wrote: »
    have you guys ever been over at a friends house and went to wash your hands and then go to dry them off and it's clearly a towel they use to shower with and you just freeze with "oh no what do I do now" ?

    I keep my towels clean. My towels are used only to dry off a clean me after I take a shower, or dry off my clean hands after I've washed them.

    I guess I always hope that the same is happening at other peoples' houses and they haven't used a small corner of their bath towel to wipe their ass or something I guess.

    NightDragon on
  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Soap on dry hands, rinse.
    Magic Pink wrote: »
    it's actually EXTREMELY easy to pee and not touch Mr. Johnson even once. That ain't even a thing.

    How

  • Magic PinkMagic Pink Tur-Boner-Fed Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    Magic Pink wrote: »
    it's actually EXTREMELY easy to pee and not touch Mr. Johnson even once. That ain't even a thing.

    How

    i'd be happy to give demonstrations to all but it basically unzip, out she comes, pee. it doesn't flail around like a fire hose

  • PoorochondriacPoorochondriac Ah, man Ah, jeezRegistered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    Magic Pink wrote: »
    it's actually EXTREMELY easy to pee and not touch Mr. Johnson even once. That ain't even a thing.

    How

    It's all in the hips

  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    edited November 2017
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    jgeis wrote: »
    In my sophomore year of college I wrote a paper about medical/health information in the bible (for a Bible as Literature class) and learned that before germ theory had been proven a lot of doctors would go around doing surgeries and delivering babies back to back while rinsing off their hands in a single big bowl of water and they were really at a loss for why so many babies dying in infancy and people not surviving otherwise successful surgeries.

    And like, at first I was like "Well no shit they died" but then I was like "holy fuck that must have been frustrating" because they just didn't know.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ignaz_Semmelweis

    e: the worst part was that doctors thought he was crazy that he suggest that a proper gentlemen was causing these deaths because they were "unclean" and fought tooth and nail against washing their hands at first

    bowen on
    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
    tynicDarkPrimusIronKnuckle's GhostRear Admiral Choco
  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Soap on dry hands, rinse.
    That seems physically impossible to me from my own perspective

  • GustavGustav Friend of Goats Somewhere in the OzarksRegistered User regular
    There was once in high school that the entire campus became enraptured in a week long mystery. Faculty and students were trying to figure out who took the Monster Dump of 2005.

    No one flushed it. How could you? It was beyond that. There were lines to the bathroom to see this towering mass of rusted coils. Whoever did it became a gripping source of intrigue. Do we congratulate them? Do we send them to a doctor? Was it a student or was it faculty?

    And like the greatest of mysteries, this one had now answer.

    aGPmIBD.jpg
  • NightDragonNightDragon 6th Grade Username Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    Magic Pink wrote: »
    it's actually EXTREMELY easy to pee and not touch Mr. Johnson even once. That ain't even a thing.

    How

    giphy.gif

    KetBratynicTonkkaMagic PinkDuke 2.0TynnanVeldrinGvzbgulNothingDonovan PuppyfuckerRear Admiral Choco
  • PoorochondriacPoorochondriac Ah, man Ah, jeezRegistered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    Gustav wrote: »
    There was once in high school that the entire campus became enraptured in a week long mystery. Faculty and students were trying to figure out who took the Monster Dump of 2005.

    No one flushed it. How could you? It was beyond that. There were lines to the bathroom to see this towering mass of rusted coils. Whoever did it became a gripping source of intrigue. Do we congratulate them? Do we send them to a doctor? Was it a student or was it faculty?

    And like the greatest of mysteries, this one had now answer.

    American Vandal season two

    GustavtynicMuddy WaterHermanoRear Admiral Choco
  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    Hand washing is for squares
    Hand washing is for squares

    HEY SATAN! HERE'S MY WISHLIST! GO NUTS YOU DEVIL!

    https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/1JI9WWSRW1YJI
  • GustavGustav Friend of Goats Somewhere in the OzarksRegistered User regular
    edited November 2017
    Gustav wrote: »
    There was once in high school that the entire campus became enraptured in a week long mystery. Faculty and students were trying to figure out who took the Monster Dump of 2005.

    No one flushed it. How could you? It was beyond that. There were lines to the bathroom to see this towering mass of rusted coils. Whoever did it became a gripping source of intrigue. Do we congratulate them? Do we send them to a doctor? Was it a student or was it faculty?

    And like the greatest of mysteries, this one had now answer.

    I'm Aaron Mahnke. And this is Lore.

    Gustav on
    aGPmIBD.jpg
  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    bowen wrote: »
    have you guys ever been over at a friends house and went to wash your hands and then go to dry them off and it's clearly a towel they use to shower with and you just freeze with "oh no what do I do now" ?

    I keep my towels clean. My towels are used only to dry off a clean me after I take a shower, or dry off my clean hands after I've washed them.

    I guess I always hope that the same is happening at other peoples' houses and they haven't used a small corner of their bath towel to wipe their ass or something I guess.

    The worst is when they have a lot of pets and they can't keep them clean and it's covered in hair too.

    And because your hands are wet that 2 week old cat hair sticks to your hands.

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
    Janson
  • KetBraKetBra Dressed Ridiculously Registered User regular
    Larlar
    Gustav wrote: »
    There was once in high school that the entire campus became enraptured in a week long mystery. Faculty and students were trying to figure out who took the Monster Dump of 2005.

    No one flushed it. How could you? It was beyond that. There were lines to the bathroom to see this towering mass of rusted coils. Whoever did it became a gripping source of intrigue. Do we congratulate them? Do we send them to a doctor? Was it a student or was it faculty?

    And like the greatest of mysteries, this one had now answer.

    American Vandal season two

    Actually it's the subject of the new season of S-town

    KGMvDLc.jpg?1
  • AuralynxAuralynx Darkness is a perspective Watching the ego workRegistered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    Magic Pink wrote: »
    Magic Pink wrote: »
    it's actually EXTREMELY easy to pee and not touch Mr. Johnson even once. That ain't even a thing.

    How

    i'd be happy to give demonstrations to all but it basically unzip, out she comes, pee. it doesn't flail around like a fire hose

    I'll pass on giving demonstrations but if it's flailing even a little it's usually a sign that something's gone wrong. In general it just sort of does its thing - the organ's hydraulic to begin with, more or less.

    kshu0oba7xnr.png

  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Soap on dry hands, rinse.
    But how would you align it

    We're talking about peeing standing up, right

  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    Magic Pink wrote: »
    it's actually EXTREMELY easy to pee and not touch Mr. Johnson even once. That ain't even a thing.

    Why should one avoid anti-bacterial soap tho?

    Soap works by basically breaking surface tension of water (makes water wetter). So soap is, usually, more than enough to get bacteria and dirt off your hands.

    Anti-bacterial is a waste because the bacteria are already gone and best case scenario it does nothing, and worst case is it's another drop in the bucket of bacterial resistance.

    Also yes it is super easy to pee without holding your johnson... I'm actually surprised I'm the first to mention it.

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
    PLADronus86
  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    But how would you align it

    We're talking about peeing standing up, right

    Unless your pee angles itself out of the penis, or you've got a curve while flaccid, it's pretty much straight out in front of you?

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • AuralynxAuralynx Darkness is a perspective Watching the ego workRegistered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    But how would you align it

    We're talking about peeing standing up, right

    Most of ours have a default position that is pretty workable for that kind of thing.

    kshu0oba7xnr.png

    bowenMagic Pink
  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.
    Yeah grabbing onto it doesn't really impart any better aim before you start peeing. It just gives you more correctability after you start going. Several years of experience and most of us can predict where our stream goes before we start.

    The worst is split/triple streams. There's no recovering from that one you just gotta let it happen.

    Fellas, make sure you pee after you have sex or masturbate not just for UTIs but to help prevent split streams.

    Only jerks don't clean up after themselves too.

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
    Magic Pink
  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Soap on dry hands, rinse.
    Auralynx wrote: »
    But how would you align it

    We're talking about peeing standing up, right

    Most of ours have a default position that is pretty workable for that kind of thing.

    I don't wanna go out and say that you guys have baby dick but

    Brovid Hasselsmofstimtokolos
  • Magic PinkMagic Pink Tur-Boner-Fed Registered User regular
    Rinse, lather, rinse.

    Auralynx wrote: »
    But how would you align it

    We're talking about peeing standing up, right

    Most of ours have a default position that is pretty workable for that kind of thing.

    I don't wanna go out and say that you guys have baby dick but

    or it's big and heavy enough it points that way and doesn;t move

  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Larlar
    so just so we're clear, this thread has devolved into a literal dick swinging contest?

    mcpDuke 2.0Brovid HasselsmofRaijin QuickfootVeldrinDonovan PuppyfuckerMadEddystimtokolosMuddy WaterStilts
  • SkwigelfSkwigelf Passed out in a cloud of farts and cigarette smoke.Registered User regular
    Well, I mean you pull it out and just rest it on the toilet paper padding you've placed on the toilet and just let it do its thing.

  • PlatyPlaty Registered User regular
    Soap on dry hands, rinse.
    No, I'm learning new things here

Sign In or Register to comment.