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[Bad News Gone Right]: 2019 - We Are All Filthy Animals, Apparently

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    AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    XBL: Nox Aeternum / PSN: NoxAeternum / NN:NoxAeternum / Steam: noxaeternum
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    I ZimbraI Zimbra Worst song, played on ugliest guitar Registered User regular
    Goose hands man his whole ass, continues his family outing.

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    ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    Geese are assholes.

    WiiU: Windrunner ; Guild Wars 2: Shadowfire.3940 ; PSN: Bradcopter
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    HevachHevach Registered User regular
    edited June 2018
    We don't see the beginning of that exchange, but the guy appears to have stopped, put on his hazards, gotten out of the car, and approached an animal. This is the point at which all sympathy dies. I don't care if that was the goddamn Puppy Dog Pals, whatever happens at this point happens because you did something stupid.

    I almost want to think he had the bright idea that he'd help the baby goose that couldn't jump up the curb, and that just makes it stupider, because as much as you do not fuck with animals, you fuck with their babies at infinitely greater risk.


    Guy in the big truck opens his door like he's going to come help and then thinks better of it, because he knows the one thing worse than fucking with an animal's babies is getting between it and its prey.

    Hevach on
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    FryFry Registered User regular
    Gone right: gosling eventually makes it up onto the curb. You can do anything if you set your mind to it!

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    AridholAridhol Daddliest Catch Registered User regular
    Don't get out of your God damned vehicle on a roadway to help animals. You're gonna make your children orphans to save some dumb ass ducklings.

    There's a hundred of these stories:
    http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/montreal/emma-czornobaj-loses-appeal-1.4152387

    No animal is worth killing yourself or others!

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    ChiselphaneChiselphane Registered User regular
    I mostly agree with that sentiment with one exception: I stop and help turtles cross when I see them, and am going to keep doing so. People out here tend to aim for them and I gather that's not just a local phenomenon.

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    AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular

    In followup, the raccoon has reached the roof, where he has been fed and humanely trapped, to be released to the wild.

    XBL: Nox Aeternum / PSN: NoxAeternum / NN:NoxAeternum / Steam: noxaeternum
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    hawkboxhawkbox Registered User regular
    Wooo! Go Bert!

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    WiseManTobesWiseManTobes Registered User regular
    hawkbox wrote: »
    Wooo! Go Bert!

    God I loved that cartoon as a kid

    Steam! Battlenet:Wisemantobes#1508
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    AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular


    Because of course a Russian water bottle is going to be a survival tool/impromptu weapon.

    XBL: Nox Aeternum / PSN: NoxAeternum / NN:NoxAeternum / Steam: noxaeternum
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    jothkijothki Registered User regular
    Shadowfire wrote: »
    Geese are assholes.

    It's interesting to compare them to ducks, who will let you do all sorts of things to their babies while they stand at a distance and glare at you in disapproval.

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    MortiousMortious The Nightmare Begins Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    I want one of those water bottles.

    Move to New Zealand
    It’s not a very important country most of the time
    http://steamcommunity.com/id/mortious
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    AridholAridhol Daddliest Catch Registered User regular
    I mostly agree with that sentiment with one exception: I stop and help turtles cross when I see them, and am going to keep doing so. People out here tend to aim for them and I gather that's not just a local phenomenon.

    That's awful. I will try to safely avoid animals if at all possible and trying to hit them is sadistic.

    Not trying to moralize for anyone here but your family doesn't give a shit about turtles in comparison to you so be safe :)

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    ZundeZunde Registered User regular
    I mostly agree with that sentiment with one exception: I stop and help turtles cross when I see them, and am going to keep doing so. People out here tend to aim for them and I gather that's not just a local phenomenon.

    *Stares in open mouth horror* But why would you aim for them. What kind of person would do that to an innocent turtle.

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    Dark Raven XDark Raven X Laugh hard, run fast, be kindRegistered User regular
    I'm struggling to think of why even some dick would do that - wouldn't the hard shell fuck up your wheels?

    Oh brilliant
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    knitdanknitdan In ur base Killin ur guysRegistered User regular
    Unfortunately I know from experience they do not. (I didn’t do it on purpose!)

    It’s two hard shells with a lot of soft tissue in the middle.

    And people do it because they don’t see animals as worthy of concern or care.

    “I was quick when I came in here, I’m twice as quick now”
    -Indiana Solo, runner of blades
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    Mr RayMr Ray Sarcasm sphereRegistered User regular
    Zunde wrote: »
    I mostly agree with that sentiment with one exception: I stop and help turtles cross when I see them, and am going to keep doing so. People out here tend to aim for them and I gather that's not just a local phenomenon.

    *Stares in open mouth horror* But why would you aim for them. What kind of person would do that to an innocent turtle.

    I think I found the culprits.
    ec360cec34b3c928cd25b07c27368dbc.jpg

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    MuzzmuzzMuzzmuzz Registered User regular
    I once had to guard a four foot snake (rather uncommon in my area) while it decided to bask in the sun an a dirt road. Of course, I couldn’t help it, I just persuaded it to move by waving my arms like a crazy teenager.

    Turns out, that snake was either endangered or a threatened species, so it was worth it.

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    DecomposeyDecomposey Registered User regular
    When I was super young, like 3 or thereabouts, I saw another child deliberately step on a baby bird that had fallen out of its nest. So I learned at a very young age that sometimes other people are just shit.

    Before following any advice, opinions, or thoughts I may have expressed in the above post, be warned: I found Keven Costners "Waterworld" to be a very entertaining film.
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    CouscousCouscous Registered User regular
    Zunde wrote: »
    I mostly agree with that sentiment with one exception: I stop and help turtles cross when I see them, and am going to keep doing so. People out here tend to aim for them and I gather that's not just a local phenomenon.

    *Stares in open mouth horror* But why would you aim for them. What kind of person would do that to an innocent turtle.

    My hypothesis is that about 1 in 50 people are huge, huge dicks.

    https://www.pressherald.com/2012/12/27/college-students-turtle-project-takes-dark-twist/
    “They aren’t thinking, really. It is not something people think about. It just seems fun at the time,” Herzog said. “It is the dark side of human nature.”
    The first time Weaver went out to collect data on turtles, he chose a spot down the road from a big apartment complex that caters to students. He counted 267 vehicles that passed by, seven of them intentionally hitting his rubber reptile.
    Running over turtles even has a place in Southern lore.

    In South Carolina author Pat Conroy’s semi-autobiographical novel “The Great Santini,” a fighter-pilot father squishes turtles during a late-night drive when he thinks his wife and kids are asleep. His wife confronts him, saying: “It takes a mighty brave man to run over turtles.”

    The father denies it at first, then claims he hits them because they are a road hazard. “It’s my only sport when I’m traveling,” he says. “My only hobby.”

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    mrpakumrpaku Registered User regular
    I had an old high school friend who used to hop his car up onto the sidewalk chasing down squirrels and rabbits because he knew it got a super-strong negative reaction from me. He also used to brag about going out to the hills with his dad and a couple of rifles to "pop" prarie dogs. And now that I'm going down this particular memory hole, I seem to remember some ancient tale of him and another guy murdering with a bat and cooking a goose who had the poor sense to be at a park when these middle school sociopaths wandered by

    And yeah, I finally realized "maybe this person is complete garbage", although way way later than I obviously should have

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    MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    Only time I've run over animals is when I was first doing a paper route in a big ol' van and as I was driving down a road in the dark of morning suddenly jackrabbits started bolting from the yards they were eating stuff in back towards the desert on the other side. A whole swarm of them crossing right in front of the van before I even realized what was happening. Whole thing lasted maybe three seconds before I regained presence of mind and by that point the remainder had completed their journey into the desert brush and vanished.

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    AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    XBL: Nox Aeternum / PSN: NoxAeternum / NN:NoxAeternum / Steam: noxaeternum
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    ElvenshaeElvenshae Registered User regular
    I mean, at least half the work there was being done by friction around the bend in the door.

    But still. :D

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    KruiteKruite Registered User regular
    Elvenshae wrote: »
    I mean, at least half the work there was being done by friction around the bend in the door.

    But still. :D

    smart kitty

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    Bliss 101Bliss 101 Registered User regular
    Decomposey wrote: »
    When I was super young, like 3 or thereabouts, I saw another child deliberately step on a baby bird that had fallen out of its nest. So I learned at a very young age that sometimes other people are just shit.

    My granparents' summer house was in an area that was absolutely infested with mildly venomous adders. I must have been around 8 - 9 years old at the time. I thought the snakes were really cool and would follow them around, or just sit really quietly at sunny spots so that the snakes would come bask in the sun next to me. A bit risky I guess, since for a child a bite might have meant a trip to the hospital, but I felt it was worth the risk and usually wore long boots when I was out looking for snakes. My grandfather, however, would kill every snake in sight, so I quickly became the local Protector of Snakes. Whenever grandpa was around, I'd guard the area around the house, gently chasing away any snakes before he could see them. He never caught on; he thought the apparent lack of snakes was because he had been so effective at killing them.

    Another animal protection adventure happened when I was around 10 - 12 and happened upon these three idiot kids my age who were trying to burn a little lizard with a magnifying glass. I tried to stop them, which led to a big brawl where I was thoroughly beaten up and got the first black eye in my life. But the lizard managed to get away, so, mission accomplished! I felt like a hero and was really proud of myself for days. Still feels nice to look back and think that I was a pretty decent kid.

    MSL59.jpg
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    DecomposeyDecomposey Registered User regular
    Yeah, I got detention in the 4th grade when I tore open the back of another kids neck with my razor sharp little girl fingernails to make him stop tormenting a cat.

    Well, I got in trouble for ripping open his neck, I got detention for refusing to apologize.

    Before following any advice, opinions, or thoughts I may have expressed in the above post, be warned: I found Keven Costners "Waterworld" to be a very entertaining film.
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    CalicaCalica Registered User regular
    edited June 2018
    Shadowfire wrote: »
    Geese are assholes.

    My experience with geese is that if you leave them alone they'll return the favor. Canada geese nested in a park I visited sometimes as a kid, and they were so used to people they'd build nests and raise their goslings in the flowerbeds next to the paths. They were fine as long as you didn't get closer than a few feet.

    edit: I know most geese aren't that chill. Still, they don't attack unless you give them a reason, or they've learned that preemptively attacking is safest.

    Calica on
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    hawkboxhawkbox Registered User regular
    I shot a prairie chicken when I was about 11 to be a "Hunter" with a bb gun, it took forever and even though I ate it after ward when my mom cleaned it I've never shot anything again. I'm a farm kid and pragmatic, but I don't need to do that kind of thing so why would I?

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    Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    Calica wrote: »
    Shadowfire wrote: »
    Geese are assholes.

    My experience with geese is that if you leave them alone they'll return the favor. Canada geese nested in a park I visited sometimes as a kid, and they were so used to people they'd build nests and raise their goslings in the flowerbeds next to the paths. They were fine as long as you didn't get closer than a few feet.

    edit: I know most geese aren't that chill. Still, they don't attack unless you give them a reason, or they've learned that preemptively attacking is safest.

    My new walk home takes me along a canal towpath which is currently occupied by geese and goslings. I've been hissed at a few times, but I just keep walking and try not to get between a parent and its young. They're still my least favourite bird on balance, but the level of sociopathy currently being discussed makes me want to hug one and reassure it that not everybody is horrible.

    [Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]
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    KaplarKaplar On Google MapsRegistered User regular

    In followup, the raccoon has reached the roof, where he has been fed and humanely trapped, to be released to the wild.


    That raccoon knows exactly where to get that delicious cat food now.

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    SoggybiscuitSoggybiscuit Tandem Electrostatic Accelerator Registered User regular



    Calica wrote: »
    Shadowfire wrote: »
    Geese are assholes.

    My experience with geese is that if you leave them alone they'll return the favor. Canada geese nested in a park I visited sometimes as a kid, and they were so used to people they'd build nests and raise their goslings in the flowerbeds next to the paths. They were fine as long as you didn't get closer than a few feet.

    edit: I know most geese aren't that chill. Still, they don't attack unless you give them a reason, or they've learned that preemptively attacking is safest.

    Yeah, the campus I'm at right is currently playing host a population of a few geese with goslings.

    I keep clear and don't make eye contact. Geese are assholes, and I'm not looking to provoke them.

    Of course, the silly geese freshman currently touring the campus and doing orientation are stopping and taking pictures precariously close to the goslings. So something is bound to happen eventually.

    Steam - Synthetic Violence | XBOX Live - Cannonfuse | PSN - CastleBravo | Twitch - SoggybiscuitPA
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    HevachHevach Registered User regular
    edited June 2018
    Calica wrote: »
    Shadowfire wrote: »
    Geese are assholes.

    My experience with geese is that if you leave them alone they'll return the favor. Canada geese nested in a park I visited sometimes as a kid, and they were so used to people they'd build nests and raise their goslings in the flowerbeds next to the paths. They were fine as long as you didn't get closer than a few feet.

    edit: I know most geese aren't that chill. Still, they don't attack unless you give them a reason, or they've learned that preemptively attacking is safest.

    Geese are filthy and loud and destructive, but they're generally not aggressive. They are, however, very defensive, especially of their nests and young, and strong enough to mess a human up fairly well*. And humans are very stupid about communication with animals that can't say, "Fuck off, asshole." So YouTube is full of shit like this of humans who were probably warned as thoroughly as a goose can manage.

    *-I mean, you're not going to get killed, but you're going to get beaten around the head and neck a lot and when you finally run away you're going to get a nasty bite on your ass with a high risk of infection.

    Hevach on
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    CalicaCalica Registered User regular
    Hevach wrote: »
    Calica wrote: »
    Shadowfire wrote: »
    Geese are assholes.

    My experience with geese is that if you leave them alone they'll return the favor. Canada geese nested in a park I visited sometimes as a kid, and they were so used to people they'd build nests and raise their goslings in the flowerbeds next to the paths. They were fine as long as you didn't get closer than a few feet.

    edit: I know most geese aren't that chill. Still, they don't attack unless you give them a reason, or they've learned that preemptively attacking is safest.

    Geese are filthy and loud and destructive, but they're generally not aggressive. They are, however, very defensive, especially of their nests and young, and strong enough to mess a human up fairly well*. And humans are very stupid about communication with animals that can't say, "Fuck off, asshole." So YouTube is full of shit like this of humans who were probably warned as thoroughly as a goose can manage.

    *-I mean, you're not going to get killed, but you're going to get beaten around the head and neck a lot and when you finally run away you're going to get a nasty bite on your ass with a high risk of infection.

    Oof, those black and white swans(?). That is not how you clip a bird's wings. I'd be pissed too.

    I wonder if they're more aggressive because they're completely grounded and can't fly or even glide away from threats?

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    knitdanknitdan In ur base Killin ur guysRegistered User regular
    Kaplar wrote: »

    In followup, the raccoon has reached the roof, where he has been fed and humanely trapped, to be released to the wild.


    That raccoon knows exactly where to get that delicious cat food now.

    In my experience, once a raccoon has been trapped it is impossible to trap again, even with delicious cat food.

    “I was quick when I came in here, I’m twice as quick now”
    -Indiana Solo, runner of blades
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    KaplarKaplar On Google MapsRegistered User regular
    Bad news: I ordered pick-up from dominoes. One of the things we ordered was a large thin crust with chicken, mushrooms, and salami. They screwed it up.

    Gone right: Called to tell them they actually gave us a hand tossed instead so they offered us a free pizza made the right way. All is well with bonus pizza.

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    Steel AngelSteel Angel Registered User regular
    knitdan wrote: »
    Kaplar wrote: »

    In followup, the raccoon has reached the roof, where he has been fed and humanely trapped, to be released to the wild.


    That raccoon knows exactly where to get that delicious cat food now.

    In my experience, once a raccoon has been trapped it is impossible to trap again, even with delicious cat food.

    Different types of live catch traps exist for a reason. Some are just a lot less convenient than the box traps you don't have to leave attended.

    Now possums? They're keep going after food in the same trap over and over again. A lost pet tracker I've used told me about a family she helped who kept catching a possum in the trap they left out for their cat. They weren't sure if they just were surrounded by possums or if it was just one very persistent one. One of the brothers decided to apply some paint to it before releasing and sure enough it was the same marked possum that refused to learn a lesson beyond where food was.

    Big Dookie wrote: »
    I found that tilting it doesn't work very well, and once I started jerking it, I got much better results.

    Steam Profile
    3DS: 3454-0268-5595 Battle.net: SteelAngel#1772
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    PolaritiePolaritie Sleepy Registered User regular
    knitdan wrote: »
    Kaplar wrote: »

    In followup, the raccoon has reached the roof, where he has been fed and humanely trapped, to be released to the wild.


    That raccoon knows exactly where to get that delicious cat food now.

    In my experience, once a raccoon has been trapped it is impossible to trap again, even with delicious cat food.

    Different types of live catch traps exist for a reason. Some are just a lot less convenient than the box traps you don't have to leave attended.

    Now possums? They're keep going after food in the same trap over and over again. A lost pet tracker I've used told me about a family she helped who kept catching a possum in the trap they left out for their cat. They weren't sure if they just were surrounded by possums or if it was just one very persistent one. One of the brothers decided to apply some paint to it before releasing and sure enough it was the same marked possum that refused to learn a lesson beyond where food was.

    How to get free food is a useful thing to learn.

    Steam: Polaritie
    3DS: 0473-8507-2652
    Switch: SW-5185-4991-5118
    PSN: AbEntropy
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    AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular
    Polaritie wrote: »
    knitdan wrote: »
    Kaplar wrote: »

    In followup, the raccoon has reached the roof, where he has been fed and humanely trapped, to be released to the wild.


    That raccoon knows exactly where to get that delicious cat food now.

    In my experience, once a raccoon has been trapped it is impossible to trap again, even with delicious cat food.

    Different types of live catch traps exist for a reason. Some are just a lot less convenient than the box traps you don't have to leave attended.

    Now possums? They're keep going after food in the same trap over and over again. A lost pet tracker I've used told me about a family she helped who kept catching a possum in the trap they left out for their cat. They weren't sure if they just were surrounded by possums or if it was just one very persistent one. One of the brothers decided to apply some paint to it before releasing and sure enough it was the same marked possum that refused to learn a lesson beyond where food was.

    How to get free food is a useful thing to learn.

    Case in point: this is a life skill that successful grad students pick up very quickly.

    XBL: Nox Aeternum / PSN: NoxAeternum / NN:NoxAeternum / Steam: noxaeternum
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