college freedom vrs dream car *solved*

HolyHesus

I have been pretty hesitant to dorm in Seattle University. The college is 25min from where I live (Bellevue). Personally I am not to thrilled about dorming with a stranger at all. I also am terrified of leaving the comforts of home (I am barely domesticated and can't even do laundry). My parents are pretty restrictive. No boys in the room. Be home at 12 maybe 12:30, no going to boy's houses ,and church every Sunday. One thing I am looking forward too is the freedom of college life.

I have been obsessing with the new Toyota Yaris Liftback. I looove cars, just love love cars. My parents presented me an offer I couldn't refuse. They said they would give me the car, pay for all expenses including parking at the school, as well as move me to the basement with a back door entrance, and supposedly no curfew. I would just die for that car, but the freedom, and college experience as well as the convenience of dorming may be priceless. I have a few friends attending UW, and a lot who will be attending Western Washington and not much attending Seattle U. So I wonder which choice would grant me enough freedom to see them. Although they claim I would have no curfew they would be less than thrilled to allow me to sleep over somewhere.

My main concerns are if I will end up being sick of the commute to SU too back home and especially if my parents will fall through with the freedom part. Also into consideration is that living on campus in SU is about a total of $12,000 a year... the same price as the car.


I am so conflicted.

Newton

Move out and forget about the car. College, particularly your first year, is as much a social experience as it is an academic one, and you will miss out on a lot by living at home.

Godfather

College freedom.


Don't even think about the consequences and just go with it. The whole setup your parents presented you with just sounds like an elaborite excuse for them to keep their daughter in check, no matter the cost.

Don't do it.

Lewisham

Fuck the car.

Go to college, go to a dorm room, and begin your steps to becoming your own person. Your development will be so stunted by living in your parent's gaze, I can't even tell you. No-one knows how to cook/clean when they leave their parents. I learnt how to clean clothes by reading the backs of washing powder boxes. I learnt how to cook by reading the recipes on the back of sauce jars.

All the best shit happens out of school time. Don't be that girl who goes "No, sorry, I have to get home, I can't drink-drive/traffic will be bad"

Thanatos

Laundry is ridiculously easy. You'll have a dining program that will have an mandatory minimum sufficient to feed a family of five.

Really, living in a dorm only resembles actual real life in the most superficial of ways, but the most important of those ways is that it gets you the fuck away from your parents. You really don't feel like you're a part of the college as a commuter student, especially living with your parents. It'll basically turn college into "High School redux."

Big Dookie

I don't know if I can give you a solid answer, but I will say this: be careful when your parents start making deals with you. They may initially tell you that you'll have the basement room, no cerfew, all expenses paid, etc - but in reality it often doesn't work out that way. Be aware that if you don't continue following their choice of lifestyle for you (going to church, being home at a reasonable time, no guys allowed, etc*), there's a good chance that they will badger you about it constantly and generally make your life miserable. And with the car, sure they may be paying for everything now, but that may change with time. And really, it should. As you become more able to, you should start taking over all your own payments, because that's what being independent is all about. Just note that things aren't going to go exactly how they may want you to believe in order to get you to stay there.

Another thing to consider is that, yes, this may be a great car... right now. In five or six years though, it'll have a ton of miles on it from commuting back and forth to school, it'll start showing wear and tear, and you won't hold it in quite as high regard as you do now, and eventually you'll end up trading it in for a new one. Cars come and go, even if they mean the world to you right now. However, the college experience is something that, once it's over, you probably won't get that opportunity again. It can help teach you about freedom and responsibility, and will help build you as a person. An invaluable experience.

Now, I'm not saying for sure one way or another, as everyone's situation is different. Just try to imagine yourself ten years from now, and ask yourself: If I could go back to 2007, would I have taken the car and stayed with my parents, or would I have gone out on my own? The answer to that could be very different from whatever way you're leaning right now while you're still in the moment.


*Not that I'm saying these are bad things, but they may not be the choices you want to make

MrOletta

I have been commuting for 4 years while attending college. I'll be finishing this July and heading up to Austin.

If I had to do it over again, I would without a doubt live close to the campus.

clsCorwin

That dorm room with stranger that your fear? Thats the college experience, and if you miss it you will regret it later.

Cars can come later. Better cars, than you can afford on your own, and no grocery getter Toyotas... aim for the Toyota powered track fury Lotus Elise.

Big Dookie

MrOletta wrote: »

I have been commuting for 4 years while attending college. I'll be finishing this July and heading up to Austin.

If I had to do it over again, I would without a doubt live close to the campus.

I think most people would say this. I've done both, and living on campus was a far better experience. It's not even close.

Chief1138

Dorm room, definitely. You're going to have to learn how to live on your own eventually, and believe me, there's something to be said for being able to stumble in to your room at 5 in the morning and not have to answer to anybody but yourself (and the hangover the next morning :P). I go to college out-of-state, and whenever I go back for breaks and the summer I feel like I'm in high school again. Once you get a taste of the freedom you'll never want to go back....

Trowizilla

I'm going to jump here with everyone saying "dorm room!" You can always get an awesome car later, but you're only going to be an undergrad once. I'm graduating soon and moving back in with my parents for about a month, and while my folks are reasonably unrestrictive, I'm still going to miss the freedom of school like crazy. Rooming with a stranger isn't bad; they can be someone you really like and end up great friends with, they can be someone you're kind of meh about but who doesn't make a bad roommate, or they can be crappy and you can sic the RA on them or apply for a change in rooms. It's rare that someone gets truly stuck with a roommate they despise.

As far as food and laundry goes: if you haven't learned that from living with your parents all this time, what makes you think that environment will help you learn in the next few years? The best way to learn is by doing. Just read the labels on your shirts and the laundry detergent. It's hard to go wrong washing everything in cold water and drying it on low. As far as food goes, a microwave and the campus meal plan should keep you well-fed.

Don't worry too much about your friends at the other school. The ones who are truly your friends will make an effort to see you, and the rest will drop away (as it should be.) Besides, you're going to make a truly dizzying amount of friends in college.

Beware of parental bargains. They'll very likely try to guilt you into doing what they want (what you've been doing this whole time) if you live with them. Part of growing up is making your own decisions and dealing with the consequences. Besides, everyone I know who commuted from their parents' house for college either really regrets it or is kind of screwed up, socially. Not to say it's not a valid option if that's the only way you can afford school, but if you've got the choice, go to the dorms!

durandal4532

Get on campus and find friends right the hell now. The only people unsastisfied with college are those unfortunates that commute. Hell, I don't even live on campus anymore, but 90% of my friends come directly from talking to people in my dorm.

As for friends at other schools, no worries. I have a lot of friends still in high school, and a lot at different schools. It can sort of divide people you know into "my college" and "other", but mostly it just lets you hang out with the people you really like. If you care, you make time.

Obs

College Freedom man. That's not even a good car. Frankly it's even a shitty car to have as a dream car in the first place, I've heard some bad reviews about. Maybe if the choice was between a ferrari or something, then we would be in a bigger dilemma.

HolyHesus

Haha, alright I am pretty convinced! Thanks for all your comments! made the decision pretty easy for someone who is indecisive.