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Emergency [chat] Protocol 7-B

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    VishNubVishNub Registered User regular
    Should we run this by our chief counsel SiG to check for ethics problems?

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    ShivahnShivahn Unaware of her barrel shifter privilege Western coastal temptressRegistered User, Moderator mod
    Wait are we scientist crowdsourcing a fruit ripening machine?

    How have none of you just decided to make it salt the fruit slightly and say that it's providing even more vital electrolytes than other fruit

    I feel there needs to be more vague health benefits

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    ArchArch Neat-o, mosquito! Registered User regular
    also we should DEFINITELY have a co-working space right near all the science-y equipment and battery acid vats

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    BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    I feel like someone should stop you scheming scientists

    It's not going to be me, but

    Someone, maybe

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    VanguardVanguard But now the dream is over. And the insect is awake.Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    Arch wrote: »
    whose salaries do we need to pay now

    Cas Eddy- CEO/Internet Connectivity
    Cred- 3d modeling, visual algorithms
    Arch- Biological consultant/ machine learning assistance
    Vish- Chemical consultant / battery acid

    I’ll do the marketing

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    VishNubVishNub Registered User regular
    Arch wrote: »
    VishNub wrote: »
    credeiki wrote: »
    Arch wrote: »
    credeiki wrote: »
    Arch wrote: »
    whose salaries do we need to pay now

    Cas Eddy- CEO/"Internet Connectivity"
    Cred- "3d modeling", "visual algorithms"
    Arch- "Biological consultant"/ "machine learning assistance"
    Vish- "Chemical consultant" / battery acid

    I thought I was just chief bullshitter
    are you going to make me do tech work? I mean I guess I could, if I really had to/got a lot of equity. Or you can just put my resume on the website because it does match the resume of someone who can do algorithms development and makes us look more reputable.
    This is a very non-diverse team of founders though...

    sorry hold on i fixed it

    oh much better

    do we want to just mostly pocket the money and work out of a hip coworking space or do we want to blow a bunch of it on unnecessary office perks in our own place? I'm leaning towards the former

    We will need somewhere to put the batteries. That's not in quotes, so I assume I have to actually do it.

    I just assumed you had battery acid on you at all times, just like if I put bugs up there it wouldn't be in quotes

    That's fair, I suppose. I think I have about 8 liters of it in the lab.

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    So It GoesSo It Goes We keep moving...Registered User regular
    VishNub wrote: »
    Should we run this by our chief counsel SiG to check for ethics problems?

    No I don't want to know anything

    Just give me my check

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    Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    a
    VishNub wrote: »
    Should we run this by our chief counsel SiG to check for ethics problems?

    hahaha what

    ethics

    what are you, mother cabrini?

    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
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    VishNubVishNub Registered User regular
    edited May 2018
    Shivahn wrote: »
    Wait are we scientist crowdsourcing a fruit ripening machine?

    How have none of you just decided to make it salt the fruit slightly and say that it's providing even more vital electrolytes than other fruit

    I feel there needs to be more vague health benefits

    Add some bicarb and call it alkaline fruit? Put some soap on it and call it micellar fruit? Do nothing and call it magnetic fruit?

    VishNub on
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    PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    MrMister wrote: »
    "Why do people who post these videos feel they have to put str8 or first time in the title? The guy is wearing the gay version of crotchless panties. The top shoves his cock in like he's shoving a quarter in a soda machine..."

    That metaphor is definitely gonna stay with me

    someone needs to tell this anonymous commenter he has a gift

    I'm glad to know that virgin videos exist for gay porn too and they are equally confusing.

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
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    ShivahnShivahn Unaware of her barrel shifter privilege Western coastal temptressRegistered User, Moderator mod
    VishNub wrote: »
    Shivahn wrote: »
    Wait are we scientist crowdsourcing a fruit ripening machine?

    How have none of you just decided to make it salt the fruit slightly and say that it's providing even more vital electrolytes than other fruit

    I feel there needs to be more vague health benefits

    Add some bicarb and call it alkaline fruit? Put some soap on it and call it micellar fruit? Do nothing and call it magnetic fruit?

    Hmm

    We can probably leverage the radioactivity of potassium-heavy fruits to something something cancer

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    credeikicredeiki Registered User regular
    Vanguard wrote: »
    Arch wrote: »
    whose salaries do we need to pay now

    Cas Eddy- CEO/Internet Connectivity
    Cred- 3d modeling, visual algorithms
    Arch- Biological consultant/ machine learning assistance
    Vish- Chemical consultant / battery acid

    I’ll do the marketing

    excuse me, I am already doing so

    we can't dilute our science brand since we're going for a high-tech image

    hm wait although if I can outsource that work to someone else, then I don't have to do any work at all

    yes, you're hired

    Steam, LoL: credeiki
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    tyrannustyrannus i am not fat Registered User regular
    edited May 2018
    PantsB wrote: »
    tyrannus wrote: »
    hello fish

    also that girl i was seeing broke it off before my trip

    so ugh back to the grind

    The good news is at first I thought she said she broke off your tip

    yeah no

    but she did break my balls tho
    So It Goes wrote: »
    VishNub wrote: »
    Should we run this by our chief counsel SiG to check for ethics problems?

    No I don't want to know anything

    Just give me my check

    it's in the mail. 100%. absolutely did not post date it.

    tyrannus on
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    ArchArch Neat-o, mosquito! Registered User regular
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    ShivahnShivahn Unaware of her barrel shifter privilege Western coastal temptressRegistered User, Moderator mod
    Arch wrote: »
    what's ethics

    Ethics is that thing that is handicapping our competition, that's what I say

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    FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    Arch wrote: »
    also we should DEFINITELY have a co-working space right near all the giant pile of wasp eggs

    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
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    credeikicredeiki Registered User regular
    edited May 2018
    The worst thing about all of this is, I am making a powerpoint describing a future product to investors (/sponsors) right now and we have 4 workdays to get the accompanying demo working and it is all exactly this skillset and the product is only slightly less imaginary

    credeiki on
    Steam, LoL: credeiki
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    RiemannLivesRiemannLives Registered User regular
    I think you all are missing the most important ingredient for any startup: a rich and connected relative to introduce you to all the suckers who will be funding it.

    The founder having her dad in the Bush admin was enough to get that total scam Theranos off the ground. Even though it eventually crashed and burned those involved had a decade to skim off a hell of a lot of money.

    Attacked by tweeeeeeees!
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    VishNubVishNub Registered User regular
    edited May 2018
    Shivahn wrote: »
    VishNub wrote: »
    Shivahn wrote: »
    Wait are we scientist crowdsourcing a fruit ripening machine?

    How have none of you just decided to make it salt the fruit slightly and say that it's providing even more vital electrolytes than other fruit

    I feel there needs to be more vague health benefits

    Add some bicarb and call it alkaline fruit? Put some soap on it and call it micellar fruit? Do nothing and call it magnetic fruit?

    Hmm

    We can probably leverage the radioactivity of potassium-heavy fruits to something something cancer

    Ooh. Eating this fruit suppresses hunger, so it's good for weight loss.

    VishNub on
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    credeikicredeiki Registered User regular
    I think you all are missing the most important ingredient for any startup: a rich and connected relative to introduce you to all the suckers who will be funding it.

    The founder having her dad in the Bush admin was enough to get that total scam Theranos off the ground. Even though it eventually crashed and burned those involved had a decade to skim off a hell of a lot of money.

    My uncle-in-law is an 8 figure kind of person who invests in shit so I have this covered

    Steam, LoL: credeiki
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    VishNubVishNub Registered User regular
    credeiki wrote: »
    I think you all are missing the most important ingredient for any startup: a rich and connected relative to introduce you to all the suckers who will be funding it.

    The founder having her dad in the Bush admin was enough to get that total scam Theranos off the ground. Even though it eventually crashed and burned those involved had a decade to skim off a hell of a lot of money.

    My uncle-in-law is an 8 figure kind of person who invests in shit so I have this covered

    I have no objections to conning your family.

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    Casual EddyCasual Eddy The Astral PlaneRegistered User regular
    i've heard cas eddy would do it for the experience

    I just passed on a job that wanted me to work for free! (they didn't have anyone with more experience than me)

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    Casual EddyCasual Eddy The Astral PlaneRegistered User regular
    MrMister wrote: »
    "Why do people who post these videos feel they have to put str8 or first time in the title? The guy is wearing the gay version of crotchless panties. The top shoves his cock in like he's shoving a quarter in a soda machine..."

    That metaphor is definitely gonna stay with me

    someone needs to tell this anonymous commenter he has a gift

    I love the occasional brilliant porn comment

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    ArchArch Neat-o, mosquito! Registered User regular
    BeNarwhal wrote: »
    I feel like someone should stop you scheming scientists

    It's not going to be me, but

    Someone, maybe

    BeNards who would stand in the way of the greatest of pursuits

    parting a fool and their money

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    NecoNeco Worthless Garbage Registered User regular
    And I’m Neco!

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    MrMisterMrMister Jesus dying on the cross in pain? Morally better than us. One has to go "all in".Registered User regular
    To make up for the crassness of (not so) oblique references to pornography, have the allegro from this guitar concerto:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UOj6ECjgFPI

    I've been listening to it over and over, because MrMrMister exposes me to Culture

    Fun fact: there are relatively few guitar concertos, because guitars aren't that loud and they struggle to compete with the orchestra--a problem largely solved in this composition through having them alternate (passing themes back and forth and etc)

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    Casual EddyCasual Eddy The Astral PlaneRegistered User regular
    other things to startup:

    my eyebrows are getting kind of bushy. can we do something about that?
    cooking is hard but I don't want a meal delivery service. what I want is delivery burritos at a greatly reduced price, also I want them immediately.
    also the burritos should make you skinny

    let's get some venture capital yall

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    credeikicredeiki Registered User regular
    other things to startup:

    my eyebrows are getting kind of bushy. can we do something about that?
    cooking is hard but I don't want a meal delivery service. what I want is delivery burritos at a greatly reduced price, also I want them immediately.
    also the burritos should make you skinny

    let's get some venture capital yall

    aren't bushy eyebrows trendy, or is the big eyebrow thing only in women's fashion?

    Steam, LoL: credeiki
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    ArchArch Neat-o, mosquito! Registered User regular
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    PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Caterpilling is only for ladies, with dudes they go "Whoa hold on there Eugene Levy" and its hurtful

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
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    ShivahnShivahn Unaware of her barrel shifter privilege Western coastal temptressRegistered User, Moderator mod
    VishNub wrote: »
    Shivahn wrote: »
    VishNub wrote: »
    Shivahn wrote: »
    Wait are we scientist crowdsourcing a fruit ripening machine?

    How have none of you just decided to make it salt the fruit slightly and say that it's providing even more vital electrolytes than other fruit

    I feel there needs to be more vague health benefits

    Add some bicarb and call it alkaline fruit? Put some soap on it and call it micellar fruit? Do nothing and call it magnetic fruit?

    Hmm

    We can probably leverage the radioactivity of potassium-heavy fruits to something something cancer

    Ooh. Eating this fruit suppresses hunger, so it's good for weight loss.

    Our ripening process increases the number of "probiotics" (via we're basically letting it rot more quickly than other fruit).

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    RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    This whole thread, in which a man foolishly signed up to help with a school trip is incredible


    Was this guy on the Apprentice

    He reminds me of a guy who was on the Apprentice

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    ShivahnShivahn Unaware of her barrel shifter privilege Western coastal temptressRegistered User, Moderator mod
    Arch wrote: »
    what if ethics were wasp eggs

    My life would be very different right now, I tell you hwat.

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    VishNubVishNub Registered User regular
    Arch wrote: »
    what if ethics were wasp eggs

    In the sense that they get implanted in you and then burrow out and kill you?

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    Evil MultifariousEvil Multifarious Registered User regular
    edited May 2018
    A man steals into your home late at night. He has the key, but he is still very quiet. You are sleeping on your side, and he crouches beside your slack face. Something gleams in his hand, and descends toward your eye, agonizingly slow. Then he plucks, quickly, once twice thrice, pauses, and plucks four more times. You make a noise and move a hand to your face; your eyes flutter open, but there is nothing, and then you drift off again. Tomorrow is the end of the month and you will see a charge for $250 on your credit card. Your eyebrows are perfect.

    Evil Multifarious on
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    Casual EddyCasual Eddy The Astral PlaneRegistered User regular
    credeiki wrote: »
    other things to startup:

    my eyebrows are getting kind of bushy. can we do something about that?
    cooking is hard but I don't want a meal delivery service. what I want is delivery burritos at a greatly reduced price, also I want them immediately.
    also the burritos should make you skinny

    let's get some venture capital yall

    aren't bushy eyebrows trendy, or is the big eyebrow thing only in women's fashion?

    Bushy isn’t the right word. Just that some eyebrow hairs are longer than others. Like, grandpa eyebrows

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    KrathoonKrathoon Registered User regular
    Drinking chlorophyll helps with weight loss. Allegedly.

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    spool32spool32 Contrary Library Registered User regular
    Arch wrote: »
    also we should DEFINITELY have a co-working space right near all the science-y equipment and battery acid vats

    Arch I want in to run the Social Media campaign.

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    wazillawazilla Having a late dinner Registered User regular
    Milkshakes are tastier than margaritas so why is it that I've had 5 margaritas in 2 hours but never more than 1 milkshake in a day?

    What is this "life"

    Psn:wazukki
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    VanguardVanguard But now the dream is over. And the insect is awake.Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    credeiki wrote: »
    other things to startup:

    my eyebrows are getting kind of bushy. can we do something about that?
    cooking is hard but I don't want a meal delivery service. what I want is delivery burritos at a greatly reduced price, also I want them immediately.
    also the burritos should make you skinny

    let's get some venture capital yall

    aren't bushy eyebrows trendy, or is the big eyebrow thing only in women's fashion?

    Bushy isn’t the right word. Just that some eyebrow hairs are longer than others. Like, grandpa eyebrows

    Got it

    We’re going to make burritos from our eyebrow that make you skinny and deliver them faster than Jimmy Johns

This discussion has been closed.