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We're all just doing our best for our [Kids]

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  • bloodyroarxxbloodyroarxx Casa GrandeRegistered User regular
    Ohhh noooooo

    The Wiggles' Emma and Lachy split after two years of marriage

  • ProlegomenaProlegomena Frictionless Spinning The VoidRegistered User regular
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Siglet started grinding her bottom teeth against her top tooth tonight and it is driving me bonkers holy shit

    god the amount of volume they are able to produce doing this

    easily a top 5 worst noise of all time contender

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  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Now I feel better my son uses a sucker still. Sure its for babies, but he can't grind his teeth...

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
  • BolthornBolthorn Registered User regular
    Preacher wrote: »
    So last night because mom was sick and daddy was uhhh being lazy as hell... I let my son go to sleep with the kindle hoping he'd like watch for thirty minutes and then go to bed. Imagine my surprise when I went to bed two hours after I put him down and hear the kindle still going... Figuring maybe he just left it on I go in there to get it like a ninja "hi daddy"... BED NOW

    Yeah because of a similar incident our daughter is no longer allowed to have her chrome book even in her room when she goes to bed. She's too much like me and would stay up until she heard a weird noise, that noise being the first birds of the morning.

  • MNC DoverMNC Dover Full-time Voice Actor Kirkland, WARegistered User regular
    Crazy how much my son (first pic) still looks like his sister (second pic) at the same age:
    bhuo2vgndf3o.jpg
    1bh3im6jc2fi.jpg

    Bonus cute pic:

    etfvvj6cesri.jpg

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  • ElvenshaeElvenshae Registered User regular
    Our shields cannot repel cuteness of such magnitude!

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  • SeptusSeptus Registered User regular
    Little Gene Simmons!

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  • SelnerSelner Registered User regular
    edited August 2018
    In other happy kid news, six-year-old had a first appointment with a new pediatric dentist today which I was nervous about, not doubting his courage but because of my own anxiety about how much I hate going to the dentist. Was thrilled and relieved to get a text from my wife with a happy pic of a smiling little boy and a note that she LOVES this dentist.

    At the same time we got a call telling us a spot opened up in the next level of his swimming lessons which we had otherwise been wait-listed for, so long as I stop on the way home this evening and pay for it, which is awesome.

    Man, when you're a parent, it's funny that mundane stuff like that makes it feel like the BEST DAY EVER.

    With my older son (6y old now), we took him to our normal dentist at the start, and he flipped out. I think we had to pay for something like three "appointments" where he wouldn't let the nice dentist lady touch his mouth.

    The pediatric dentist was a godsend. Older son loves the dentist now, and his brother and sister also love the dentist (they never went to the normal dentist).
    So It Goes wrote: »
    Siglet started grinding her bottom teeth against her top tooth tonight and it is driving me bonkers holy shit

    My daughter has been grinding her teeth recently as well (4y old). It sounds like she's actively removing enamel. I ask her to please not do that every time.

    However, pretty much every time I get a new dental hygienist at the dentist, they ask me about me grinding my teeth. Which I'm not aware that I even do.

    Selner on
  • MNC DoverMNC Dover Full-time Voice Actor Kirkland, WARegistered User regular
    axktb0lmauy3.jpg

    Abigail was quite excited to meet the Chick-Fil-A cow today.

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  • MulysaSemproniusMulysaSempronius but also susie nyRegistered User regular
    Last night or little boy was insistent that Mommy loved him, and Daddy loves sister. And that Daddy didn't love him, and I didn't love his sister.
    This morning, he said me and him were super heroes, and his sister and Daddy were bad guys.

    If that's all there is my friends, then let's keep dancing
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  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    edited August 2018
    Took the kids to the grocery store to figure out what's for dinner while the wifey is doing sorority stuff.

    Me: Ooh, we can get organic chicken breast and I'll cut them into strips! Then you two can help season them with the flavors you want! I can grill any veggies you choose and make mashed potatoes too!
    Youngest son: I want dinosaur nuggets.
    Oldest son: I'll have regular nuggets.
    Me: ...
    Oldest son: Can we get the microwave French fries too?

    I'm, I'm just going to go lay down in traffic for a few minutes. Damn kids.

    Capt Howdy on
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  • ProlegomenaProlegomena Frictionless Spinning The VoidRegistered User regular
    William has been making his own breakfast for ages now, but in the early days he engaged in some... flavour experimentation.

    "Daddy, I had porridge, with cinnamon..."

    "Oh, that sounds delicious!"

    "... and basil, and thyme, and cumin."

    "Did... did you eat all of it?"

    "I ate... some of it."

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  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    Making chicken nuggets from scratch is easy enough, although I understand if you don’t want to deal with the oil.

  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    Moriveth wrote: »
    Making chicken nuggets from scratch is easy enough, although I understand if you don’t want to deal with the oil.

    No no. It had to be the Tyson ones. It's like taking box mac n cheese over real mac n cheese. Madness I tell you.

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  • Captain InertiaCaptain Inertia Registered User regular
    So I have a baby coming in 11 weeks

    What do I do

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  • MNC DoverMNC Dover Full-time Voice Actor Kirkland, WARegistered User regular
    So I have a baby coming in 11 weeks

    What do I do

    Enjoy your free time as much as possible.

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  • FishmanFishman Put your goddamned hand in the goddamned Box of Pain. Registered User regular
    The night before my firstborn was induced, I stayed up till 3am watching Army of Darkness.

    I'm not saying it was the best use of that time, but I'm not saying it wasn't, either.

    X-Com LP Thread I, II, III, IV, V
    That's unbelievably cool. Your new name is cool guy. Let's have sex.
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  • plufimplufim Dr Registered User regular
    Nothing to fill these times are a waste if you enjoy them. Especially when it's a movie or game you won't be able to watch around young kids

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  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    So I have a baby coming in 11 weeks

    What do I do

    Anything and everything you want to do that could be interrupted by a tiny crying creature that absolutely requires all your attention to stay alive.

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  • Captain InertiaCaptain Inertia Registered User regular
    Fishman wrote: »
    The night before my firstborn was induced, I stayed up till 3am watching Army of Darkness.

    I'm not saying it was the best use of that time, but I'm not saying it wasn't, either.

    This is a good movie to watch around October 20...

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    Yeah enjoy the few days you have left where you aren't obligated to an emotional terrorist

    I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.

    pleasepaypreacher.net
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  • ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    Learn to slouch. Some of my best Destiny playing time was when Jaina was a couple months old and sleeping on my chest.

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  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    MNC Dover wrote: »
    So I have a baby coming in 11 weeks

    What do I do

    Enjoy your free time as much as possible.

    Honestly, this.

    It really is a great time for a baby moon, or to simply just play a lot of games and do anything that requires a lot of your attention!

    So I’ve mentioned Niko is like me (loves chocolate, obsessive personality, tidy & organized, keeps a good mental inventory of his belongings). Anya, meanwhile, is just like @Moriveth - they share many positive traits, such as being avid readers at a young age, but then there’s also this...

    Niko: I put my shoes on!
    Me: Oh, you did! Well done Niko! Anya, can you put your shoes on, please?
    *a couple of minutes later*
    Me: Anya, you have one shoe on and it’s on the wrong foot.
    Anya: Oh, silly me! *pulls her shoe off*
    Me: Anya... they’re still on the wrong feet.
    Anya: Whoops! I forgot!
    Me: Well, if they’re on the wrong feet, just switch them around.
    Anya *pulls off her shoes and tries again*
    Me: Anya... how on earth did you get them on the wrong feet again?
    Anya: My silly brain! I forgot again.

    Anya: Mommmmm, where’s my necklace?
    Me: Well, you were wearing it when I buckled you in the car seat, and you haven’t moved, so... are you still wearing it?
    Anya: No I’m not!
    *pause*
    Anya: Oh wait, I am.

    Me: *tells Mori about the necklace*
    Mori: Well, when we were in the zoo earlier there was a tortoise sitting riiiight in front of the glass, and she couldn’t see it! It was RIGHT THERE!
    Me: Well, you’re one to talk.
    Mori: Hey!

    A short while later:

    Mori: Raaaachel, where’s your phone?
    Me: It’s on the bed.
    Mori: No it’s n- oh, it’s right in front of me.

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  • ProlegomenaProlegomena Frictionless Spinning The VoidRegistered User regular
    So I have a baby coming in 11 weeks

    What do I do

    Write your book, record your album, paint your masterpiece, whatever it is, do it now, now I say.

    Mojo_JojoCapt HowdySlacker71LoisLane
  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    I got my vasectomy scheduled, wooo!

    Sept 6, baybeee

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  • SeptusSeptus Registered User regular
    Moriveth wrote: »
    I got my vasectomy scheduled, wooo!

    Sept 6, baybeee

    Hmm, hopefully no more babies though.

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  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    Septus wrote: »
    Moriveth wrote: »
    I got my vasectomy scheduled, wooo!

    Sept 6, baybeee

    Hmm, hopefully no more babies though.

    Moriveth Diary: 7 September 2018.
    Mrs. Moriveth has informed me she is three weeks pregnant. I am also out of frozen peas.

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  • ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    Today was like a scene out of kindergarten cop at preschool for me. Jaina has a friend there named Zachariah, and she loves to talk about him.

    "What did you do with Zachariah today, honey?"
    "He's a boy! Boys have a penis!"
    .....
    "Girls have a vulva!"

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  • Drake ChambersDrake Chambers Lay out my formal shorts. Registered User regular
    Shadowfire wrote: »
    Today was like a scene out of kindergarten cop at preschool for me. Jaina has a friend there named Zachariah, and she loves to talk about him.

    "What did you do with Zachariah today, honey?"
    "He's a boy! Boys have a penis!"
    .....
    "Girls have a vulva!"

    My favorite variation of that was the out-of-the-blue, non sequitur statement of my friend's 4-year-old niece:

    "Girls have po-po's, boys have humma-humma's!

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  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    The predilection for kids to talk about their genitals is hilarious and hilariously awkward

    One time Niko refused to give me a hug and I jokingly said "Niko, you're a beast!"

    His response was "AND MY PENIS IS BIIIIIIIIIIG!"

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  • MNC DoverMNC Dover Full-time Voice Actor Kirkland, WARegistered User regular
    Can’t decide if I’m the best or the worst father for getting Abigail a donut this morning. Probably a little bit of both.

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  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    Should have given her a big powdered donut and had her play out scenes from Scarface.

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  • Drake ChambersDrake Chambers Lay out my formal shorts. Registered User regular
    Yesterday I had one of those moments where I was legitimately inspired to be a better person by my kid.

    Ian (6) has just started his second level of swimming lessons. The first stage didn't really involve getting his head fully submerged, so we've been working up to that and encouraging him to dunk his face during play in the kiddie pool in our backyard. JP (4) watched him do it and started doing it himself, which surprised mom and drew her attention and encouragement. Well Ian was having none of that, and immediately responded "I can dunk deeper than JP!" and proceeded to do so.

    This got me thinking about bravery, defined as doing something you need to do even though you're afraid to do it, and how genuinely brave little kids really have to be all the time. Life as a little kid is largely out of your control and consists of being shuttled to activities and forced into them during school and kids just suck it up and deal with it. I thought about how much of my life through high school involved feelings of anxiety about stuff I had to face, and it's a big chunk of growing up.

    Then you're an adult with autonomy and it's so much easier, when faced with something you don't want to do, to just not do it. Obviously adults have their share of have-to's as well but even in those cases you can often steer the ship towards something that's more comfortable.

    So today I have new resolve. There are things I should do that I haven't been doing because I could find an excuse, thereby avoiding something uncomfortable. Not today though! Today I'm going to be brave like my six-year-old son and just freaking do it.

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  • SolventSolvent Econ-artist กรุงเทพมหานครRegistered User regular
    Hello fellow parents. There is a stupidly, ridiculously long coach ride in my future. Please recommend for me simple Android games that might distract my 2 year old for some hours.
    Requirements: works offline, no in-app purchases. I can pay a few dollars if the recommendation is suitably enthusiastic.

    I don't know where he got the scorpions, or how he got them into my mattress.

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  • Mojo_JojoMojo_Jojo We are only now beginning to understand the full power and ramifications of sexual intercourse Registered User regular
    Solvent wrote: »
    Hello fellow parents. There is a stupidly, ridiculously long coach ride in my future. Please recommend for me simple Android games that might distract my 2 year old for some hours.
    Requirements: works offline, no in-app purchases. I can pay a few dollars if the recommendation is suitably enthusiastic.

    Nothing can occupy a two year old for hours

    We use sticker books with some success on flights. We probably get 30 minutes of engagement with that if she's in the mood

    Homogeneous distribution of your varieties of amuse-gueule
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  • SporkAndrewSporkAndrew Registered User, ClubPA regular
    Mojo_Jojo wrote: »
    Solvent wrote: »
    Hello fellow parents. There is a stupidly, ridiculously long coach ride in my future. Please recommend for me simple Android games that might distract my 2 year old for some hours.
    Requirements: works offline, no in-app purchases. I can pay a few dollars if the recommendation is suitably enthusiastic.

    Nothing can occupy a two year old for hours

    We use sticker books with some success on flights. We probably get 30 minutes of engagement with that if she's in the mood

    Sticker books, colouring books, games of snap, cheap jigsaw puzzles, anything.

    For long plane journeys in the past we've been to the local pound shop and just grabbed handfuls of "activity book" things. Some of them came with crayons or stickers, but wrapped up they gave a few things to do - unwrap, inspect the contents, flick through the book, stick some stickers, colour some pictures, then get bored and want to do something else after 20-30 minutes.

    Intersperse that with eating, watching an episode of something they enjoy, and some time spent playing games on the tablet / phone and the time will fly by*

    As for app recommendations - mine loves the Toca series of games. Toca Farm on Android is fun because he likes piling people up inside the cowsheds and getting the tractor stuck in mud. Get some headphones for them if you get the Toca game that lets you make music, though, for your own sanity.

    * Go on forever and ever and never end

    The one about the fucking space hairdresser and the cowboy. He's got a tinfoil pal and a pedal bin
    ElvenshaeSmrtnik
  • Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Solvent wrote: »
    Hello fellow parents. There is a stupidly, ridiculously long coach ride in my future. Please recommend for me simple Android games that might distract my 2 year old for some hours.
    Requirements: works offline, no in-app purchases. I can pay a few dollars if the recommendation is suitably enthusiastic.

    NyQuil?

    *Editor's note - giving children adult medications can be deadly, this advice was given in jest, not a serious suggestion.

    Capt HowdyPreacherSmrtnik
  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    Solvent wrote: »
    Hello fellow parents. There is a stupidly, ridiculously long coach ride in my future. Please recommend for me simple Android games that might distract my 2 year old for some hours.
    Requirements: works offline, no in-app purchases. I can pay a few dollars if the recommendation is suitably enthusiastic.

    NyQuil?

    *Editor's note - giving children adult medications can be deadly, this advice was given in jest, not a serious suggestion.

    I think Chris meant to suggest children's melatonin, but he might hate meat sacks, so who knows.

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  • SolventSolvent Econ-artist กรุงเทพมหานครRegistered User regular
    Well I guess I was unclear, I didn't mean hours at a stretch like: "here kiddo, take my phone and play, dad's going to sleep now". I am familiar with the attention span of my child.
    I meant hours cumulative.

    Hmmm, sticker books. I wonder if it's possible to find something like that around here.

    I don't know where he got the scorpions, or how he got them into my mattress.

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