Mods know too much about the [Conspiracy Theories] thread

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  • augustaugust where you come from is gone Registered User regular
    Pac Man's character is difficult to explain even to the Japanese -- he is an innocent character. He hasn't been educated to discern between good and evil. He acts more like a small child than a grown-up person. Think of him as a child learning in the course of his daily activities. If someone tells him guns are evil, he would be the type to rush out and eat guns. But he would most probably eat any gun, even the pistols of policemen who need them.
    BloodySlothCambiataMild ConfusionArbitraryDescriptorShadowfireGnome-InterruptusmarajiElvenshaeCaulk Bite 6NobeardLoisLane
  • ZavianZavian Senātus Populusque Rōmānus Registered User regular
    This is clearly a plot by the Social Distancing Cardboard Donut conglomerates
    7qhbldnsax6o.jpeg
    https://news.yahoo.com/guy-wore-giant-donut-public-213900223.html

    Polaritiewebguy20NitsuaGnome-InterruptusmarajiElvenshaeDoodmann21stCenturySealCaulk Bite 6EddyNobeard
  • augustaugust where you come from is gone Registered User regular
    Pac Man's character is difficult to explain even to the Japanese -- he is an innocent character. He hasn't been educated to discern between good and evil. He acts more like a small child than a grown-up person. Think of him as a child learning in the course of his daily activities. If someone tells him guns are evil, he would be the type to rush out and eat guns. But he would most probably eat any gun, even the pistols of policemen who need them.
  • evilmrhenryevilmrhenry Registered User regular
    august wrote: »

    "Trump is going around shaking everyone's hands and otherwise not taking even the most basic precautions to avoid infection, therefore the virus is fake" isn't even that bad of a logical leap, it's just missing the more obvious explanation. It's amazing what seems obvious once you remove "Trump is actually a moron who should never have been placed in a position of power" from the possibilities.

    CambiatafurlionSmrtnikElvenshaeGvzbgulCentipede DamascusNightDragonSleepHappy Little MachineGONG-00DisruptedCapitalistpainfulPleasanceMunkus BeaverCaulk Bite 6Lord_Asmodeusshryke
  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    "That's not possible, that would mean I voted badly, and this can't be MY fault. Holy crap, guys, he's right! If this isn't MY fault, then clearly Hilary has to be totally going to jail this time, for realsies!"

    Mild ConfusionElvenshaeL Ron Howardautono-wally, erotibot300SleeppainfulPleasanceLord_AsmodeusEddyLoisLane
  • augustaugust where you come from is gone Registered User regular
    Pac Man's character is difficult to explain even to the Japanese -- he is an innocent character. He hasn't been educated to discern between good and evil. He acts more like a small child than a grown-up person. Think of him as a child learning in the course of his daily activities. If someone tells him guns are evil, he would be the type to rush out and eat guns. But he would most probably eat any gun, even the pistols of policemen who need them.
    L Ron HowardMild ConfusionElvenshaeVishNubTOGSolidLord_Asmodeus
  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    Hoz wrote: »
    Caught this article on /r/science - https://www.nature.com/articles/s41591-020-0820-9

    The notable bit:
    "Our analyses clearly show that SARS-CoV-2 is not a laboratory construct or a purposefully manipulated virus."

    So this is something that could be used to combat conspiracy theory mongering.

    Cross quoting from one of the seven coronavirus threads:
    [quotes]It is improbable that SARS-CoV-2 emerged through laboratory manipulation of a related SARS-CoV-like coronavirus. As noted above, the RBD of SARS-CoV-2 is optimized for binding to human ACE2 with an efficient solution different from those previously predicted7,11. Furthermore, if genetic manipulation had been performed, one of the several reverse-genetic systems available for betacoronaviruses would probably have been used19. However, the genetic data irrefutably show that SARS-CoV-2 is not derived from any previously used virus backbone20. Instead, we propose two scenarios that can plausibly explain the origin of SARS-CoV-2: (i) natural selection in an animal host before zoonotic transfer; and (ii) natural selection in humans following zoonotic transfer. We also discuss whether selection during passage could have given rise to SARS-CoV-2.[/quote]

    The two bolded basically translate as, "It does a thing viruses do in a way we haven't seen before," and, "This wasn't built with any of the Lego pieces in the bucket." Basically, if this was made in a lab, it was made completely from scratch, which is beyond even hypothetical knowledge and why would the end product still fall into a known classification?

    They provide an interesting theory I haven't seen before. We've matched it to a previously known coronavirus that infects bats, but they propose that it could have jumped to humans almost any point in the past and been a benign or mild coronavirus that escaped detection, and the severe strain emerged in humans rather than jumping to humans.

    Mayabirdmaraji
  • ZavianZavian Senātus Populusque Rōmānus Registered User regular
    UNVERIFIED CONSPIRACY THEORY: Nature has bioengineered the virus as a form of population control as it feels humanity is overpopulated and a threat to Nature.

    #BanNature
    #WarOnNature

    augustMild ConfusionKayne Red RobeSleep
  • [Expletive deleted][Expletive deleted] The mediocre doctor NorwayRegistered User regular
    Zavian wrote: »
    UNVERIFIED CONSPIRACY THEORY: Nature has bioengineered the virus as a form of population control as it feels humanity is overpopulated and a threat to Nature.

    #BanNature
    #WarOnNature

    I've known Nature was evil since they refused to publish my paper.

    But I'll show them. I'll show them all!

    Sic transit gloria mundi.
    OrcamarajiMild ConfusionShadowfireElvenshaePolaritieGONG-00David WalgasTynnanLord_Asmodeusshryke
  • Gabriel_PittGabriel_Pitt (effective against the Irish) Registered User regular
    Zavian wrote: »
    UNVERIFIED CONSPIRACY THEORY: Nature has bioengineered the virus as a form of population control as it feels humanity is overpopulated and a threat to Nature.

    #BanNature
    #WarOnNature

    #OhshitBlueGenderWasRight.

    I for one will scream in terror and flee from our bug overlords.

    Caulk Bite 6Nyysjan
  • DiannaoChongDiannaoChong Registered User regular
    a
    august wrote: »

    "Trump is going around shaking everyone's hands and otherwise not taking even the most basic precautions to avoid infection, therefore the virus is fake" isn't even that bad of a logical leap, it's just missing the more obvious explanation. It's amazing what seems obvious once you remove "Trump is actually a moron who should never have been placed in a position of power" from the possibilities.

    I think its pretty clear, he can't catch it because he's too rich and important to catch it.(also its just habit) Just like doctors shunned the idea of hygiene when it was first getting pushed because they were educated higher cast members, how dare you infer that they could be unclean.

    steam_sig.png
    painfulPleasanceCaulk Bite 6
  • marajimaraji Registered User regular
    edited March 18
    Hevach wrote: »
    Hoz wrote: »
    Caught this article on /r/science - https://www.nature.com/articles/s41591-020-0820-9

    The notable bit:
    "Our analyses clearly show that SARS-CoV-2 is not a laboratory construct or a purposefully manipulated virus."

    So this is something that could be used to combat conspiracy theory mongering.

    Cross quoting from one of the seven coronavirus threads:
    It is improbable that SARS-CoV-2 emerged through laboratory manipulation of a related SARS-CoV-like coronavirus. As noted above, the RBD of SARS-CoV-2 is optimized for binding to human ACE2 with an efficient solution different from those previously predicted7,11. Furthermore, if genetic manipulation had been performed, one of the several reverse-genetic systems available for betacoronaviruses would probably have been used19. However, the genetic data irrefutably show that SARS-CoV-2 is not derived from any previously used virus backbone20. Instead, we propose two scenarios that can plausibly explain the origin of SARS-CoV-2: (i) natural selection in an animal host before zoonotic transfer; and (ii) natural selection in humans following zoonotic transfer. We also discuss whether selection during passage could have given rise to SARS-CoV-2.

    The two bolded basically translate as, "It does a thing viruses do in a way we haven't seen before," and, "This wasn't built with any of the Lego pieces in the bucket." Basically, if this was made in a lab, it was made completely from scratch, which is beyond even hypothetical knowledge and why would the end product still fall into a known classification?

    They provide an interesting theory I haven't seen before. We've matched it to a previously known coronavirus that infects bats, but they propose that it could have jumped to humans almost any point in the past and been a benign or mild coronavirus that escaped detection, and the severe strain emerged in humans rather than jumping to humans.

    Blah blah blah. You can’t believe scientists, they probably made this Corolla virus thingy!

    maraji on
    Elvenshae
  • ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    Zavian wrote: »
    UNVERIFIED CONSPIRACY THEORY: Nature has bioengineered the virus as a form of population control as it feels humanity is overpopulated and a threat to Nature.

    #BanNature
    #WarOnNature

    #OhshitBlueGenderWasRight.

    I for one will scream in terror and flee from our bug overlords.

    The Happening is happening.

    WiiU: Windrunner ; Guild Wars 2: Shadowfire.3940 ; PSN: Bradcopter
    21stCenturyBloodySlothmarajiCentipede Damascus
  • Ninja Snarl PNinja Snarl P My helmet is my burden. Ninja Snarl: Gone, but not forgotten.Registered User regular
    I'd prefer my "Earth has an immune system" in the form of kaiju, thank you very much.

    Virus is a pretty boring route, and nature never seems able to come up with one that really does the job. There's always some persistent percentage of the population that just won't die, and then what do you have? A disease that doesn't work on killing humans anymore. What a waste.

    Gnome-InterruptusGvzbgulfurlionKayne Red RobemarajiCambiatadurandal4532DoodmannMoridin889ForarHappy Little MachineGONG-00Mild Confusionyossarian_livesCaulk Bite 6Lord_Asmodeus
  • marajimaraji Registered User regular
    I'd prefer my "Earth has an immune system" in the form of kaiju, thank you very much.

    Virus is a pretty boring route, and nature never seems able to come up with one that really does the job. There's always some persistent percentage of the population that just won't die, and then what do you have? A disease that doesn't work on killing humans anymore. What a waste.

    Nuke it from orbit - it’s the only way to be sure?

  • PhyphorPhyphor Building Planet Busters Tasting FruitRegistered User regular
    Zavian wrote: »
    UNVERIFIED CONSPIRACY THEORY: Nature has bioengineered the virus as a form of population control as it feels humanity is overpopulated and a threat to Nature.

    #BanNature
    #WarOnNature

    Planet is fighting back, still this is better than mind worms

    ElvenshaeAuralynxGONG-00Kayne Red Robemjn6172AresProphet
  • ZavianZavian Senātus Populusque Rōmānus Registered User regular
    I'd prefer my "Earth has an immune system" in the form of kaiju, thank you very much.

    Virus is a pretty boring route, and nature never seems able to come up with one that really does the job. There's always some persistent percentage of the population that just won't die, and then what do you have? A disease that doesn't work on killing humans anymore. What a waste.

    Might need some humans left to fight aliens

  • Ninja Snarl PNinja Snarl P My helmet is my burden. Ninja Snarl: Gone, but not forgotten.Registered User regular
    Zavian wrote: »
    I'd prefer my "Earth has an immune system" in the form of kaiju, thank you very much.

    Virus is a pretty boring route, and nature never seems able to come up with one that really does the job. There's always some persistent percentage of the population that just won't die, and then what do you have? A disease that doesn't work on killing humans anymore. What a waste.

    Might need some humans left to fight aliens

    If I've learned anything about kaiju, it's that they're great for fighting aliens. Just keep those bad boys buried, sucker the aliens in with all that liquid water and biomass, then WHAMMO, out come the flying turtles and radioactive sea dragons! It's a perfect system.

    ElvenshaemarajiMoridin889RingoGONG-00furlionMild ConfusionpainfulPleasanceCaulk Bite 6NyysjanLord_Asmodeus
  • ZavianZavian Senātus Populusque Rōmānus Registered User regular
    Zavian wrote: »
    I'd prefer my "Earth has an immune system" in the form of kaiju, thank you very much.

    Virus is a pretty boring route, and nature never seems able to come up with one that really does the job. There's always some persistent percentage of the population that just won't die, and then what do you have? A disease that doesn't work on killing humans anymore. What a waste.

    Might need some humans left to fight aliens

    If I've learned anything about kaiju, it's that they're great for fighting aliens. Just keep those bad boys buried, sucker the aliens in with all that liquid water and biomass, then WHAMMO, out come the flying turtles and radioactive sea dragons! It's a perfect system.
    Clearly we need to allow vast domestic nuclear weapons testing in the hopes of creating American Godzilla to protect us from space alien kaiju. Those damn hippies are gonna get us killed!

    Elvenshae
  • OptyOpty Registered User regular
    a
    august wrote: »

    "Trump is going around shaking everyone's hands and otherwise not taking even the most basic precautions to avoid infection, therefore the virus is fake" isn't even that bad of a logical leap, it's just missing the more obvious explanation. It's amazing what seems obvious once you remove "Trump is actually a moron who should never have been placed in a position of power" from the possibilities.

    I think its pretty clear, he can't catch it because he's too rich and important to catch it.(also its just habit) Just like doctors shunned the idea of hygiene when it was first getting pushed because they were educated higher cast members, how dare you infer that they could be unclean.

    And then the man who figured out the answer to "why are so many women dying after child birth" was "because we're not cleaning our hands before delivering babies, we should clean our hands before delivering babies" was ostracized and eventually institutionalized for that very reason.

    Mayabirdautono-wally, erotibot300
  • MayabirdMayabird Pecking at the keyboardRegistered User regular
    The founder of Judicial Watch, the right-wing conspiracy theory "activist" group that basically does nothing but grift old people and rabidly snarl Clinton/Obama hate, is suing China for $20 trillion claiming that SARS2 is a Chinese bioweapon that got loose, siting a bunch of tabloids and fellow conspiracy theorists.

    I have no idea what he thinks he's actually going to get out of this. Cred with the rubes? Or is he drinking his own Flavor Aid?

    SoggybiscuitmarajiCambiata
  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    Mayabird wrote: »
    The founder of Judicial Watch, the right-wing conspiracy theory "activist" group that basically does nothing but grift old people and rabidly snarl Clinton/Obama hate, is suing China for $20 trillion claiming that SARS2 is a Chinese bioweapon that got loose, siting a bunch of tabloids and fellow conspiracy theorists.

    I have no idea what he thinks he's actually going to get out of this. Cred with the rubes? Or is he drinking his own Flavor Aid?

    Seems to be a true believer. The fraudsters never seem to put skin in the game. They talk and talk and might get sued because they don't understand where the legal lines are, but they generally live by the principle "don't start nothing won't be nothing," while winding up others to start shit themselves.

    True believers do shit like volunteer for a job just to sue the army for giving him orders from an illegal president, or shoot a congresswoman, or try to cut the power lines to a cell tower and shoot the cops who show up. Their identity is tied into the delusion so the believe they already have skin in the game.

    Gnome-InterruptusmarajiSmrtnikCambiataMild ConfusionpainfulPleasanceshryke
  • RingoRingo HE KEEPS REPEATING THE LINE I'M GONNA CRY BLEASE LET HIM LIVE YOU MADE ME WATCH SO MUCH KISSING IN THIS FILM LET INIGO LIVERegistered User regular
    Zavian wrote: »
    Zavian wrote: »
    I'd prefer my "Earth has an immune system" in the form of kaiju, thank you very much.

    Virus is a pretty boring route, and nature never seems able to come up with one that really does the job. There's always some persistent percentage of the population that just won't die, and then what do you have? A disease that doesn't work on killing humans anymore. What a waste.

    Might need some humans left to fight aliens

    If I've learned anything about kaiju, it's that they're great for fighting aliens. Just keep those bad boys buried, sucker the aliens in with all that liquid water and biomass, then WHAMMO, out come the flying turtles and radioactive sea dragons! It's a perfect system.
    Clearly we need to allow vast domestic nuclear weapons testing in the hopes of creating American Godzilla to protect us from space alien kaiju. Those damn hippies are gonna get us killed!

    Add in some Super Soldier Serum annnnnd....
    5stdd5r8ste21.jpg

    Sterica wrote: »
    I know my last visit to my grandpa on his deathbed was to find out how the whole Nazi werewolf thing turned out.
    Edcrab's Exigency RPG
    ElvenshaeDark Raven XmarajikimefurlionShadowfireMild ConfusionCaulk Bite 6Lord_AsmodeusEddyNobeardLoisLanemjn6172
  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus premium Registered User regular
    Ringo wrote: »
    Zavian wrote: »
    Zavian wrote: »
    I'd prefer my "Earth has an immune system" in the form of kaiju, thank you very much.

    Virus is a pretty boring route, and nature never seems able to come up with one that really does the job. There's always some persistent percentage of the population that just won't die, and then what do you have? A disease that doesn't work on killing humans anymore. What a waste.

    Might need some humans left to fight aliens

    If I've learned anything about kaiju, it's that they're great for fighting aliens. Just keep those bad boys buried, sucker the aliens in with all that liquid water and biomass, then WHAMMO, out come the flying turtles and radioactive sea dragons! It's a perfect system.
    Clearly we need to allow vast domestic nuclear weapons testing in the hopes of creating American Godzilla to protect us from space alien kaiju. Those damn hippies are gonna get us killed!

    Add in some Super Soldier Serum annnnnd....
    5stdd5r8ste21.jpg

    American Kaiju's real name is Tod Ziller.

    dt3GeqU.png
    Gamertag: PrimusD | Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
    ElvenshaeNinja Snarl PDark Raven XRingoBloodySlothMild ConfusionCaulk Bite 6Lord_AsmodeusshrykeNobeard
  • Gnome-InterruptusGnome-Interruptus Registered User regular
    New conspiracy - Trump is bungling the COV-19 response hoping that if it gets bad enough in the USA, then Mexico WILL pay to build the wall.

    steam_sig.png
    MWO: Adamski
    NightDragonAimmarajipainfulPleasanceshryke
  • Ninja Snarl PNinja Snarl P My helmet is my burden. Ninja Snarl: Gone, but not forgotten.Registered User regular
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    Ringo wrote: »
    Zavian wrote: »
    Zavian wrote: »
    I'd prefer my "Earth has an immune system" in the form of kaiju, thank you very much.

    Virus is a pretty boring route, and nature never seems able to come up with one that really does the job. There's always some persistent percentage of the population that just won't die, and then what do you have? A disease that doesn't work on killing humans anymore. What a waste.

    Might need some humans left to fight aliens

    If I've learned anything about kaiju, it's that they're great for fighting aliens. Just keep those bad boys buried, sucker the aliens in with all that liquid water and biomass, then WHAMMO, out come the flying turtles and radioactive sea dragons! It's a perfect system.
    Clearly we need to allow vast domestic nuclear weapons testing in the hopes of creating American Godzilla to protect us from space alien kaiju. Those damn hippies are gonna get us killed!

    Add in some Super Soldier Serum annnnnd....
    5stdd5r8ste21.jpg

    American Kaiju's real name is Tod Ziller.

    The guy uses the power of military spending gone haywire to turn into a gigantic rage-powered lizard-man bearing the American flag and screams "USA".

    Honestly? Kind of an over-subtle critique of American nationalism. He really needs something stupidly flashy to get him over the top, like sparkly eye-beams, or a bigass lizard flag-cape that lets him fly.

  • MayabirdMayabird Pecking at the keyboardRegistered User regular
    Anti-vaxxers know what the REAL enemy is during the goddamn global pandemic: that's right, it's vaccinations! They fear that one day we'll have a vaccine to end the pandemic, and are already making plans.
    “If they fast-track some vaccine for coronavirus, how are all of us going to defend ourselves?” she asked. “I’ll let them vaccinate my daughter over my dead body.”

    Other members of the group, Tarrant County Crunchy Mamas, chimed in.

    “Hide in the floors like they hid the Jews from the Nazis,” one suggested. “Hide them in our gun safe (yes, it’s a big safe and yes, we love our guns),” said another.

    They're already holding COVID-19 parties, aren't they?

    Eddy
  • ZavianZavian Senātus Populusque Rōmānus Registered User regular
    Mayabird wrote: »
    Anti-vaxxers know what the REAL enemy is during the goddamn global pandemic: that's right, it's vaccinations! They fear that one day we'll have a vaccine to end the pandemic, and are already making plans.
    “If they fast-track some vaccine for coronavirus, how are all of us going to defend ourselves?” she asked. “I’ll let them vaccinate my daughter over my dead body.”

    Other members of the group, Tarrant County Crunchy Mamas, chimed in.

    “Hide in the floors like they hid the Jews from the Nazis,” one suggested. “Hide them in our gun safe (yes, it’s a big safe and yes, we love our guns),” said another.

    They're already holding COVID-19 parties, aren't they?

    Covid-19 gun safe parties don't sound very fun nor safe

    ElvenshaeKayne Red Robe
  • marajimaraji Registered User regular
    edited March 22
    Mayabird wrote: »
    Anti-vaxxers know what the REAL enemy is during the goddamn global pandemic: that's right, it's vaccinations! They fear that one day we'll have a vaccine to end the pandemic, and are already making plans.
    “If they fast-track some vaccine for coronavirus, how are all of us going to defend ourselves?” she asked. “I’ll let them vaccinate my daughter over my dead body.”

    Other members of the group, Tarrant County Crunchy Mamas, chimed in.

    “Hide in the floors like they hid the Jews from the Nazis,” one suggested. “Hide them in our gun safe (yes, it’s a big safe and yes, we love our guns),” said another.

    They're already holding COVID-19 parties, aren't they?

    I don’t actually know the answer to this, are gun safes airtight?

    maraji on
  • Ninja Snarl PNinja Snarl P My helmet is my burden. Ninja Snarl: Gone, but not forgotten.Registered User regular
    maraji wrote: »
    Mayabird wrote: »
    Anti-vaxxers know what the REAL enemy is during the goddamn global pandemic: that's right, it's vaccinations! They fear that one day we'll have a vaccine to end the pandemic, and are already making plans.
    “If they fast-track some vaccine for coronavirus, how are all of us going to defend ourselves?” she asked. “I’ll let them vaccinate my daughter over my dead body.”

    Other members of the group, Tarrant County Crunchy Mamas, chimed in.

    “Hide in the floors like they hid the Jews from the Nazis,” one suggested. “Hide them in our gun safe (yes, it’s a big safe and yes, we love our guns),” said another.

    They're already holding COVID-19 parties, aren't they?

    I don’t actually know the answer to this, are gun safes airtight?

    They can be, or near enough to it as not to make a difference. The point of gunsafes isn't to put something both portable and immensely valuable behind a near-impenetrable barrier, it's to just make it difficult to get access to the firearms without the key. A gunsafe that is also fire resistant is also going to be intentionally open somewhere, as that avenue of airflow is what keeps the contents from being cooked.

    But people will also put guns in regular safes, which are almost certainly completely airtight.

    But one way or another you probably don't want to be locked in a safe with the guns.

    ElvenshaeKayne Red Robe
  • evilmrhenryevilmrhenry Registered User regular
    maraji wrote: »
    Mayabird wrote: »
    Anti-vaxxers know what the REAL enemy is during the goddamn global pandemic: that's right, it's vaccinations! They fear that one day we'll have a vaccine to end the pandemic, and are already making plans.
    “If they fast-track some vaccine for coronavirus, how are all of us going to defend ourselves?” she asked. “I’ll let them vaccinate my daughter over my dead body.”

    Other members of the group, Tarrant County Crunchy Mamas, chimed in.

    “Hide in the floors like they hid the Jews from the Nazis,” one suggested. “Hide them in our gun safe (yes, it’s a big safe and yes, we love our guns),” said another.

    They're already holding COVID-19 parties, aren't they?

    I don’t actually know the answer to this, are gun safes airtight?

    It might be a walk-in gun safe. Those should have ventilation.

    The good news is a plague is a good way to get people interested in ways not to get the plague, so getting herd immunity should be easier than usual with a working vaccine. (Assuming nobody does anything stupid like charging people for it.) I assume the usual suspects who have "concerns" about vaccines will be getting this one, as it's a bit too obvious what it would be protecting people from. There will be fools, because there are always fools, but as long as we can hit herd immunity, it doesn't matter. (And there's enough attention on this one to push for a full eradication campaign.)

  • GvzbgulGvzbgul Ask me about my scrotalist agenda Registered User regular
    My sister who's a teacher heard from one of the parents that the China made Corona vaccine is what is reallly gonna kill everyone.

  • augustaugust where you come from is gone Registered User regular
    When someone fails to show deference to Trump, a group of people need to hypnotize themselves into believing that said person is guilty of crimes that merit imprisonment or execution.

    In this case: Dr. Fauci created Covid-19

    Pac Man's character is difficult to explain even to the Japanese -- he is an innocent character. He hasn't been educated to discern between good and evil. He acts more like a small child than a grown-up person. Think of him as a child learning in the course of his daily activities. If someone tells him guns are evil, he would be the type to rush out and eat guns. But he would most probably eat any gun, even the pistols of policemen who need them.
    ElvenshaeMild ConfusionEddyLoisLane
  • MayabirdMayabird Pecking at the keyboardRegistered User regular
    Mayabird wrote: »
    They're already holding COVID-19 parties, aren't they?

    Yep. Already one report of a coronavirus party in Kentucky with at least one infection from it. Undoubtedly more that aren't being reported (yet). Good job, dumbasses.

    ElvenshaemarajiKayne Red RobeMild ConfusionGnome-Interruptus
  • Caulk Bite 6Caulk Bite 6 One of the multitude of Dans infesting this place Registered User regular
    august wrote: »

    I had to look up TRU News and... uh that is not satire, apparently

    jnij103vqi2i.png
  • Dongs GaloreDongs Galore Registered User regular
    Are you prepared to have your mind blown out your ass by a daunting revelation?

    Here it is: a cabal of Australian nationalists is responsible for both world wars.

    The story begins in 1893, with Archduke Franz Ferdinand's visit to Australia. There he met a young Billy Hughes, staunch patriot and future Prime Minister of Australia. In his correspondence with Frederick Jordan, future Chief Justice of New South Wales, Hughes revealed a deep hatred of the Austrian archduke, whom he describes as a self-indulgent cretin. This hatred festered for more than a decade.

    In 1909, and again in 1911, Hughes' close friend and confidante Frank Tudor, future leader of the Australian Labour Party, visited Belgrade. On both occasions, Tudor was hosted by Colonel Dragutin Dimitrijević - the future Chief of Serbian Military Intelligence, and architect of the plot which killed Franz Ferdinand.

    There is no direct evidence that Billy Hughes ever met Colonel Dimitrijević, however, there is correspondence between members of the Serbian Black Hand that refers to a mysterious "little corporal" behind Dimitrijević's schemes. In Australia, Billy Hughes was derisively known as the Little Corporal before winning the more affectionate nickname "little digger" during the war. Following the assassination of Franz Ferdinand, one member of the Black Hand also claimed his masters had been following the orders of an unknown Englishman.

    Hughes was enthusiastic about the outbreak of the First World War. He seized on it as a chance to assert Australia militarily on the world stage, making an absolute commitment to support the British war effort. It was during this war that some of Australia's foundational national myths took shape, and the war weakened the British Empire to the point that the Dominions were able to assert sovereignty on a level that was unthinkable before 1914.

    During the Paris Peace Conference, Japan demanded that the new League of Nations recognize the racial equality of the asiatic races. It was the Australian delegation which refused point blank to accept any such agreement, forcing Woodrow Wilson to deny Japan's requests. This humiliating rejection was a key factor in the rise of Japanese militarism and the collapse of the Anglo-Japanese Alliance, leading directly to the Second World War in the Pacific - and with it the demise of Britain as a world power, permanently ending Australia's political and economic dependence on her former suzerain.

    By the time Billy Hughes died in 1952, Australia had attained her place in the sun. His old enemy Franz Ferdinand was dead, and his life's work was complete.

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  • PolaritiePolaritie Sleepy Registered User regular
    Are you prepared to have your mind blown out your ass by a daunting revelation?

    Here it is: a cabal of Australian nationalists is responsible for both world wars.

    The story begins in 1893, with Archduke Franz Ferdinand's visit to Australia. There he met a young Billy Hughes, staunch patriot and future Prime Minister of Australia. In his correspondence with Frederick Jordan, future Chief Justice of New South Wales, Hughes revealed a deep hatred of the Austrian archduke, whom he describes as a self-indulgent cretin. This hatred festered for more than a decade.

    In 1909, and again in 1911, Hughes' close friend and confidante Frank Tudor, future leader of the Australian Labour Party, visited Belgrade. On both occasions, Tudor was hosted by Colonel Dragutin Dimitrijević - the future Chief of Serbian Military Intelligence, and architect of the plot which killed Franz Ferdinand.

    There is no direct evidence that Billy Hughes ever met Colonel Dimitrijević, however, there is correspondence between members of the Serbian Black Hand that refers to a mysterious "little corporal" behind Dimitrijević's schemes. In Australia, Billy Hughes was derisively known as the Little Corporal before winning the more affectionate nickname "little digger" during the war. Following the assassination of Franz Ferdinand, one member of the Black Hand also claimed his masters had been following the orders of an unknown Englishman.

    Hughes was enthusiastic about the outbreak of the First World War. He seized on it as a chance to assert Australia militarily on the world stage, making an absolute commitment to support the British war effort. It was during this war that some of Australia's foundational national myths took shape, and the war weakened the British Empire to the point that the Dominions were able to assert sovereignty on a level that was unthinkable before 1914.

    During the Paris Peace Conference, Japan demanded that the new League of Nations recognize the racial equality of the asiatic races. It was the Australian delegation which refused point blank to accept any such agreement, forcing Woodrow Wilson to deny Japan's requests. This humiliating rejection was a key factor in the rise of Japanese militarism and the collapse of the Anglo-Japanese Alliance, leading directly to the Second World War in the Pacific - and with it the demise of Britain as a world power, permanently ending Australia's political and economic dependence on her former suzerain.

    By the time Billy Hughes died in 1952, Australia had attained her place in the sun. His old enemy Franz Ferdinand was dead, and his life's work was complete.

    ...See, now I don't know what to believe. That reads depressingly plausible, but then I look at the thread title and...

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  • Ninja Snarl PNinja Snarl P My helmet is my burden. Ninja Snarl: Gone, but not forgotten.Registered User regular
    edited March 25
    I think it's something somebody came up with just to prove they were right in History class when they screwed up and said an Australian started WWI and then doubled down when corrected to "Austrian", saying "what's the difference?"

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  • OrcaOrca Registered User regular
    What the fuck?

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