Yeah I think that dating apps are very flawed tbh, and they are bad for some people more than others
One thing I always worry if whether my pictures are better pictures of me than, you know, actually seeing me in person haha
I used to worry about that. But then I got good at taking selfies and now I know for a fact that I'm prettier in photos than in person, so I don't gotta worry about it anymore.
I'm not bothered if someone finds me attractive in person or not
But I would not want to have pictures which misrepresent me! I'd rather that I look like photo me. Which, inevitably, people go for the best photos of themselves which I get, but it does make me a teensy bit self-conscious.
Yeah I think that dating apps are very flawed tbh, and they are bad for some people more than others
One thing I always worry if whether my pictures are better pictures of me than, you know, actually seeing me in person haha
I used to worry about that. But then I got good at taking selfies and now I know for a fact that I'm prettier in photos than in person, so I don't gotta worry about it anymore.
I'm not bothered if someone finds me attractive in person or not
But I would not want to have pictures which misrepresent me! I'd rather that I look like photo me. Which, inevitably, people go for the best photos of themselves which I get, but it does make me a teensy bit self-conscious.
On the other hand, you know, what can you do?
Personally, I've found most people to be more attractive in person than in their photos, but ymmv I guess.
There's so much more to take from seeing a person in motion.
Yeah I think that dating apps are very flawed tbh, and they are bad for some people more than others
One thing I always worry if whether my pictures are better pictures of me than, you know, actually seeing me in person haha
I used to worry about that. But then I got good at taking selfies and now I know for a fact that I'm prettier in photos than in person, so I don't gotta worry about it anymore.
I'm not bothered if someone finds me attractive in person or not
But I would not want to have pictures which misrepresent me! I'd rather that I look like photo me. Which, inevitably, people go for the best photos of themselves which I get, but it does make me a teensy bit self-conscious.
On the other hand, you know, what can you do?
Personally, I've found most people to be more attractive in person than in their photos, but ymmv I guess.
There's so much more to take from seeing a person in motion.
You said I was handsome when I posted my pictures so I'm just going to take this to mean you're saying I'm even more handsome than that
Uriel I think you really need to take a close look at the cycle you are in:
1) Put self down and feel sad because you're stuck in a rut
2) Receive advice/support/suggestions
3) Do not implement any suggestions
Repeat at stage one.
I'm not sure you're aware of the cycle but you're stuck in it and have been for a while. I'm not suggesting things that cost money to make changes but like the book with CBT exercises you could get from a library and writing journals that balance out the negative thinking, and I'm certainly not going to suggest that your sadness can be overcome by doing a bit of yoga or meditating because we all know that's not how it works it would be condescending to suggest so. But you need to do something or the cycle is going to continue.
Also this isn't a prompt for a "sorry guys I shouldn't post about this sorry to waste your time" post like I sometimes see from folks but I'm just hoping to draw your attention to the cycle so you'll consciously try to break it.
I randomly matched with a cutie on bumble and she asked if I wanted to get drinks tomorrow night and like
Yeah
But also
No
I wish I could make up my mind. I fluctuate between wanting a relationship and then, when presented with the (very few and far between) prospect of trying to take the first steps to getting to know a person it's like, wait maybe this isn't what I want? I don't know if its apathy or the idea of getting out of my comfort zone or what? I've gone on dates. That is a thing I can do. Maybe it's the effort? I gotta be "fun" and ""engaging"" and """attractive""". Its exhausting and I just don't feel like I've got enough gas in the tank to try and impress somebody or make them see me in anything more than a platonic light.
Uriel I think you really need to take a close look at the cycle you are in:
1) Put self down and feel sad because you're stuck in a rut
2) Receive advice/support/suggestions
3) Do not implement any suggestions
Repeat at stage one.
I'm not sure you're aware of the cycle but you're stuck in it and have been for a while. I'm not suggesting things that cost money to make changes but like the book with CBT exercises you could get from a library and writing journals that balance out the negative thinking, and I'm certainly not going to suggest that your sadness can be overcome by doing a bit of yoga or meditating because we all know that's not how it works it would be condescending to suggest so. But you need to do something or the cycle is going to continue.
Also this isn't a prompt for a "sorry guys I shouldn't post about this sorry to waste your time" post like I sometimes see from folks but I'm just hoping to draw your attention to the cycle so you'll consciously try to break it.
Naw my bad. I'm just not trying hard enough as always.
I randomly matched with a cutie on bumble and she asked if I wanted to get drinks tomorrow night and like
Yeah
But also
No
I wish I could make up my mind. I fluctuate between wanting a relationship and then, when presented with the (very few and far between) prospect of trying to take the first steps to getting to know a person it's like, wait maybe this isn't what I want? I don't know if its apathy or the idea of getting out of my comfort zone or what? I've gone on dates. That is a thing I can do. Maybe it's the effort? I gotta be "fun" and ""engaging"" and """attractive""". Its exhausting and I just don't feel like I've got enough gas in the tank to try and impress somebody or make them see me in anything more than a platonic light.
Meeting new people is terrifying as fuck if you have social anxiety.
I struggle with meeting people from online which I do occasionally and every time it's the same "holy shit what if I do something stupid" and I have panic attacks about it.
not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
I actually don't really have social anxiety. I don't think, anyway. I mean I do, but I think it's the normal amount of anxiety that everybody has.
I can make myself be fun and boisterous and likable but it's more in a host-y kind of way? I work better in large groups where I can bounce from person to person and sort of entertain and make people laugh and feel included in conversations. I'm good at that! But one on one individual interactions where there are like, stakes are a huge drain. It feels like an inordinate amount of effort to try and get a person to like me in a romantic sense because I can't really "turn off." At least not at first. And I gotta turn off. My base operating system is sad shamble man.
Uriel I think you really need to take a close look at the cycle you are in:
1) Put self down and feel sad because you're stuck in a rut
2) Receive advice/support/suggestions
3) Do not implement any suggestions
Repeat at stage one.
I'm not sure you're aware of the cycle but you're stuck in it and have been for a while. I'm not suggesting things that cost money to make changes but like the book with CBT exercises you could get from a library and writing journals that balance out the negative thinking, and I'm certainly not going to suggest that your sadness can be overcome by doing a bit of yoga or meditating because we all know that's not how it works it would be condescending to suggest so. But you need to do something or the cycle is going to continue.
Also this isn't a prompt for a "sorry guys I shouldn't post about this sorry to waste your time" post like I sometimes see from folks but I'm just hoping to draw your attention to the cycle so you'll consciously try to break it.
Naw my bad. I'm just not trying hard enough as always.
It's not about trying harder it's about trying something different. This cycle is bad for you and it's hurting you, and we don't want to see you hurt, we want you to be happy! Everyone here wants that, we are your friends. But at the moment you're bouncing off a wall so clearly we need to try another way or we're going to get nowhere.
I actually don't really have social anxiety. I don't think, anyway. I mean I do, but I think it's the normal amount of anxiety that everybody has.
I can make myself be fun and boisterous and likable but it's more in a host-y kind of way? I work better in large groups where I can bounce from person to person and sort of entertain and make people laugh and feel included in conversations. I'm good at that! But one on one individual interactions where there are like, stakes are a huge drain. It feels like an inordinate amount of effort to try and get a person to like me in a romantic sense because I can't really "turn off." At least not at first. And I gotta turn off. My base operating system is sad shamble man.
Uriel I think you really need to take a close look at the cycle you are in:
1) Put self down and feel sad because you're stuck in a rut
2) Receive advice/support/suggestions
3) Do not implement any suggestions
Repeat at stage one.
I'm not sure you're aware of the cycle but you're stuck in it and have been for a while. I'm not suggesting things that cost money to make changes but like the book with CBT exercises you could get from a library and writing journals that balance out the negative thinking, and I'm certainly not going to suggest that your sadness can be overcome by doing a bit of yoga or meditating because we all know that's not how it works it would be condescending to suggest so. But you need to do something or the cycle is going to continue.
Also this isn't a prompt for a "sorry guys I shouldn't post about this sorry to waste your time" post like I sometimes see from folks but I'm just hoping to draw your attention to the cycle so you'll consciously try to break it.
Naw my bad. I'm just not trying hard enough as always.
It's not about trying harder it's about trying something different. This cycle is bad for you and it's hurting you, and we don't want to see you hurt, we want you to be happy! Everyone here wants that, we are your friends. But at the moment you're bouncing off a wall so clearly we need to try another way or we're going to get nowhere.
I've been doing literally everything I know how to do and have been reaching the end of my rope with it all the past few months. Trying to work with OOD so I can get a job and make my budget more comfortable (and not look like a worthless mooch regardless of how well I manage my own shit, that's just the stigma) in social situations for example. Or getting out to that larp event that was almost more draining than officiating my friends wedding... Or signing up for bumble and getting shit all for any dates on the rare occasion I get a match at all. How am I supposed to think literally anything else will be different? How am I supposed to find the energy for it? Shit I'm getting major dental surgery next week too so I have the whole anxiety about that and the way it'll be harder to date when I'm wearing a top denture...
I actually don't really have social anxiety. I don't think, anyway. I mean I do, but I think it's the normal amount of anxiety that everybody has.
I can make myself be fun and boisterous and likable but it's more in a host-y kind of way? I work better in large groups where I can bounce from person to person and sort of entertain and make people laugh and feel included in conversations. I'm good at that! But one on one individual interactions where there are like, stakes are a huge drain. It feels like an inordinate amount of effort to try and get a person to like me in a romantic sense because I can't really "turn off." At least not at first. And I gotta turn off. My base operating system is sad shamble man.
If I'm honest? I think that dating for you is not good for you right now. Like dating is hard on people, emotionally it's hard, it takes up time, it can cost loads, and online dating is the worst for all those things. It's not making you happy, it's making you stressed and upset and frustrated.
So maybe free yourself from it. Turn off the apps, let it go for a while. You can always come back to it and you don't need it or what it might bring.
I actually don't really have social anxiety. I don't think, anyway. I mean I do, but I think it's the normal amount of anxiety that everybody has.
I can make myself be fun and boisterous and likable but it's more in a host-y kind of way? I work better in large groups where I can bounce from person to person and sort of entertain and make people laugh and feel included in conversations. I'm good at that! But one on one individual interactions where there are like, stakes are a huge drain. It feels like an inordinate amount of effort to try and get a person to like me in a romantic sense because I can't really "turn off." At least not at first. And I gotta turn off. My base operating system is sad shamble man.
Ah you're a real Jay Gatsby then
Yes.
Wait.
No.
I've never read this book.
He’s a real cool guy who never does anything wrong and everyone likes him!
If I'm honest? I think that dating for you is not good for you right now. Like dating is hard on people, emotionally it's hard, it takes up time, it can cost loads, and online dating is the worst for all those things. It's not making you happy, it's making you stressed and upset and frustrated.
So maybe free yourself from it. Turn off the apps, let it go for a while. You can always come back to it and you don't need it or what it might bring.
Fair
I did delete bumble and that's basically what I was saying in the first place.
It's just real shitty to confront the fact that no one wants to touch you or be near you or spend time with you and the longer I wait the more it approaches impossible.
Look I don't think that's a good way to see it, and I don't think it's true either.
I'm not going to patronise you or preach to you but when you say "it is approaching impossible for anyone to want to be with me" well that's not correct and it's important to challenge that.
I dunno. I know what my needs are and the whole problem is I feel helpless in finding a way to get them met.
Sometimes people need physical and emotional affection, or one on one quality time with someone they enjoy, trusting support and a shoulder to cry on and so on.
I am not expecting any of this to be less complicated or painful or messy than I know it to be. I am tired... Exhausted of being made to feel inadequate or otherwise wrong as a person by it systemically.
Far be it from me to criticize other people's expectations but they seem almost universally misaligned with me and mine. I don't expect a woman to be my mother because I'm disabled... I don't expect a woman to do the emotional labor to fix me, I'm bearing that cross myself already I just want to be accepted that despite my flaws I am still a valuable and whole person... I am looking for a friend, and a partner to whom I can extend all the same respect to as a person.
I actually don't really have social anxiety. I don't think, anyway. I mean I do, but I think it's the normal amount of anxiety that everybody has.
I can make myself be fun and boisterous and likable but it's more in a host-y kind of way? I work better in large groups where I can bounce from person to person and sort of entertain and make people laugh and feel included in conversations. I'm good at that! But one on one individual interactions where there are like, stakes are a huge drain. It feels like an inordinate amount of effort to try and get a person to like me in a romantic sense because I can't really "turn off." At least not at first. And I gotta turn off. My base operating system is sad shamble man.
Ah you're a real Jay Gatsby then
Yes.
Wait.
No.
I've never read this book.
He’s a real cool guy who never does anything wrong and everyone likes him!
I feel like a bougie 20's playboy because I just got sushi bite-squaded to the bar I'm at.
Uriel I think above all else, you need to change the way you talk about yourself. I'm not sure I've ever seen you post a single positive thing about yourself, it's always super negative and self-defeating. CBT would be super, super helpful to you to reframe the way you talk about yourself and how you talk to yourself. I agree with Liiya that a CBT book would be a great start. That kind of therapy has been super useful to me personally, and it's been surprising how much kinder/nicer I am to myself as a result. It's a really positive change you can start making right now. Dating is exhausting, putting yourself out there is exhausting, but if all you're getting from it is a feeling of negative self-worth, it might be time to take a step back and allow yourself some time to work on you, so you can feel better about yourself, and offer your next partner a better you.
I actually don't really have social anxiety. I don't think, anyway. I mean I do, but I think it's the normal amount of anxiety that everybody has.
I can make myself be fun and boisterous and likable but it's more in a host-y kind of way? I work better in large groups where I can bounce from person to person and sort of entertain and make people laugh and feel included in conversations. I'm good at that! But one on one individual interactions where there are like, stakes are a huge drain. It feels like an inordinate amount of effort to try and get a person to like me in a romantic sense because I can't really "turn off." At least not at first. And I gotta turn off. My base operating system is sad shamble man.
Ah you're a real Jay Gatsby then
Yes.
Wait.
No.
I've never read this book.
He’s a real cool guy who never does anything wrong and everyone likes him!
I feel like a bougie 20's playboy because I just got sushi bite-squaded to the bar I'm at.
So my wife said that my Valentine's Day gift would be on the 15th this year and come to my office, instead of our house. Huh. Okay.
I am called up to open a nondescript cardboard box, which contained a deeply concerning box within!
The deeply concerning box itself turned out to contain...
A literal bouquet of salamis and a bull-head pinata which itself contains jerky and preserved meats.
My wife, she is the best.
Update: apparently the deeply concerning box was because for an extra $10 you can get them to wrap it in several layers of duct tape to frustrate the recipient. Fortunately for me and much to my wife's chagrin, I've carried a semi-serrated utiliknife with me at basically all times it's practical/allowable to carry a folding knife since I was like 19, so after 5 seconds of trying to figure out how I was supposed to open it I just cut a hatch in the box.
+14
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JedocIn the scupperswith the staggers and jagsRegistered Userregular
Bite Squad. Its basically postmates I guess? I live in the boonies and this is really the only food delivery service to show up here.
But they actually hire their employees as opposed to using "independent contractors" to get around like, minimum wage and healthcare stuff.
That's rad. I love ordering food on the weekend in my pajamas, but I am deeply worried about the people who bring me my food. I really wish they had benefits, and I'm going to do some research to see if that's something I can support around here.
It’s easy and a defense mechanism to be self-deprecating; I know I definitely have a tendency to do myself down as a way to shield myself from outside criticism. The problem is, that the more you believe it yourself, the more other people believe it.
It took me way too long to learn the above in a work environment; I would be coy and modest about the work I had done, and all that happened was that my bosses would take me at my word and didn’t value the work I had done as a result, because I didn’t sell my work as having any value.
I make damn sure everybody knows both how and why I’m such a good language teacher, because people repeat that mess to their friends when it comes up, and it means more students asking for me.
I have one more class before it’s time to get ready for Valentine’s Day 2019.
This woman is a notorious canceler, and I would like money but today I would be very happy if she cancels last minute.
sarukun on
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KetarCome on upstairswe're having a partyRegistered Userregular
My wife doesn't make too big of a deal out of Valentine's, thankfully, but she does like to go out to dinner so we end up doing that most years. We both had to work last night though, so we decided we'd go out tonight instead. Made some dinner reservations, I took our kids to go visit their grandparents, stopped off at the fancy chocolate place on the way back to buy my wife's favorite truffles and everything was in order for a nice evening.
Then my wife called me to tell me there was an active shooter at a business nearby, straight down the road. Did you hear about the workplace shooting in Illinois today? Yeah, it was that one. My wife was running the ICU at the nearest hospital. The first she heard about it was when someone from the hospital rushed in and told her there was an active shooter and they needed to clear as many beds as possible in the ICU for an unknown number of incoming patients. The person notifying them was in such a rush that they ended up thinking the shooter was in the hospital with them. It took a couple of minutes to clear that up, apparently. After moving patients that were stable enough to leave the ICU and clear some beds my wife headed to the ER to help coordinate, since patients there would likely end up coming to her next. 6 people died in the shooting, including the gunman. 5 police officers were wounded. She said the worst part of the afternoon wasn't even when she thought there was a shooter in her building, it was down there by the ER. It was just chaos, and patients were sent to at least 4 area hospitals. And the worst part was the desperate, panicked family members trying to find out if their loved ones were in that hospital or somewhere else. The wife of one of the police officers, in particular, stood out.
My wife ended up staying at the hospital for hours beyond the end of her shift. We skipped our dinner out. She went to tae kwon do for a while so she could hit something. We had a fairly quiet dinner at home and I tried to help her vent. She talked about moving to another country, and that's not so outlandish given her medical background and having already uprooted from one country to another when she was a teenager. We might try to go out tomorrow night instead, but we'll see. She's working in the same ICU again tomorrow and being there is going to keep her anger and frustration burning. I'll just do my best to be an outlet for her as needed and take it from there.
Jesus @Ketar , I'm so sorry your wife's having to go through that, I can't imagine. It sounds like you're being a great support to her, I'm sure it's well appreciated. That's awful all around. :sad:
Posts
I'm not bothered if someone finds me attractive in person or not
But I would not want to have pictures which misrepresent me! I'd rather that I look like photo me. Which, inevitably, people go for the best photos of themselves which I get, but it does make me a teensy bit self-conscious.
On the other hand, you know, what can you do?
It's more like a bayou hovel.
I am called up to open a nondescript cardboard box, which contained a deeply concerning box within!
The deeply concerning box itself turned out to contain...
A literal bouquet of salamis and a bull-head pinata which itself contains jerky and preserved meats.
My wife, she is the best.
It's impolite to ask people about their sex lives!!!
These fortnite expansions are getting out of hand.
Personally, I've found most people to be more attractive in person than in their photos, but ymmv I guess.
There's so much more to take from seeing a person in motion.
Steam ID - VeldrinD | SS Post | Wishlist
You said I was handsome when I posted my pictures so I'm just going to take this to mean you're saying I'm even more handsome than that
Happy days
1) Put self down and feel sad because you're stuck in a rut
2) Receive advice/support/suggestions
3) Do not implement any suggestions
Repeat at stage one.
I'm not sure you're aware of the cycle but you're stuck in it and have been for a while. I'm not suggesting things that cost money to make changes but like the book with CBT exercises you could get from a library and writing journals that balance out the negative thinking, and I'm certainly not going to suggest that your sadness can be overcome by doing a bit of yoga or meditating because we all know that's not how it works it would be condescending to suggest so. But you need to do something or the cycle is going to continue.
Also this isn't a prompt for a "sorry guys I shouldn't post about this sorry to waste your time" post like I sometimes see from folks but I'm just hoping to draw your attention to the cycle so you'll consciously try to break it.
Yeah
But also
No
I wish I could make up my mind. I fluctuate between wanting a relationship and then, when presented with the (very few and far between) prospect of trying to take the first steps to getting to know a person it's like, wait maybe this isn't what I want? I don't know if its apathy or the idea of getting out of my comfort zone or what? I've gone on dates. That is a thing I can do. Maybe it's the effort? I gotta be "fun" and ""engaging"" and """attractive""". Its exhausting and I just don't feel like I've got enough gas in the tank to try and impress somebody or make them see me in anything more than a platonic light.
Naw my bad. I'm just not trying hard enough as always.
Meeting new people is terrifying as fuck if you have social anxiety.
I struggle with meeting people from online which I do occasionally and every time it's the same "holy shit what if I do something stupid" and I have panic attacks about it.
I can make myself be fun and boisterous and likable but it's more in a host-y kind of way? I work better in large groups where I can bounce from person to person and sort of entertain and make people laugh and feel included in conversations. I'm good at that! But one on one individual interactions where there are like, stakes are a huge drain. It feels like an inordinate amount of effort to try and get a person to like me in a romantic sense because I can't really "turn off." At least not at first. And I gotta turn off. My base operating system is sad shamble man.
It's not about trying harder it's about trying something different. This cycle is bad for you and it's hurting you, and we don't want to see you hurt, we want you to be happy! Everyone here wants that, we are your friends. But at the moment you're bouncing off a wall so clearly we need to try another way or we're going to get nowhere.
Ah you're a real Jay Gatsby then
I've been doing literally everything I know how to do and have been reaching the end of my rope with it all the past few months. Trying to work with OOD so I can get a job and make my budget more comfortable (and not look like a worthless mooch regardless of how well I manage my own shit, that's just the stigma) in social situations for example. Or getting out to that larp event that was almost more draining than officiating my friends wedding... Or signing up for bumble and getting shit all for any dates on the rare occasion I get a match at all. How am I supposed to think literally anything else will be different? How am I supposed to find the energy for it? Shit I'm getting major dental surgery next week too so I have the whole anxiety about that and the way it'll be harder to date when I'm wearing a top denture...
Yes.
Wait.
No.
I've never read this book.
So maybe free yourself from it. Turn off the apps, let it go for a while. You can always come back to it and you don't need it or what it might bring.
He’s a real cool guy who never does anything wrong and everyone likes him!
Fair
I did delete bumble and that's basically what I was saying in the first place.
It's just real shitty to confront the fact that no one wants to touch you or be near you or spend time with you and the longer I wait the more it approaches impossible.
I'm not going to patronise you or preach to you but when you say "it is approaching impossible for anyone to want to be with me" well that's not correct and it's important to challenge that.
Sometimes people need physical and emotional affection, or one on one quality time with someone they enjoy, trusting support and a shoulder to cry on and so on.
I am not expecting any of this to be less complicated or painful or messy than I know it to be. I am tired... Exhausted of being made to feel inadequate or otherwise wrong as a person by it systemically.
Far be it from me to criticize other people's expectations but they seem almost universally misaligned with me and mine. I don't expect a woman to be my mother because I'm disabled... I don't expect a woman to do the emotional labor to fix me, I'm bearing that cross myself already I just want to be accepted that despite my flaws I am still a valuable and whole person... I am looking for a friend, and a partner to whom I can extend all the same respect to as a person.
I feel like a bougie 20's playboy because I just got sushi bite-squaded to the bar I'm at.
The future is now!
Bite what now
But they actually hire their employees as opposed to using "independent contractors" to get around like, minimum wage and healthcare stuff.
Update: apparently the deeply concerning box was because for an extra $10 you can get them to wrap it in several layers of duct tape to frustrate the recipient. Fortunately for me and much to my wife's chagrin, I've carried a semi-serrated utiliknife with me at basically all times it's practical/allowable to carry a folding knife since I was like 19, so after 5 seconds of trying to figure out how I was supposed to open it I just cut a hatch in the box.
That's rad. I love ordering food on the weekend in my pajamas, but I am deeply worried about the people who bring me my food. I really wish they had benefits, and I'm going to do some research to see if that's something I can support around here.
I've read articles and experienced both sides and
It's completely normal that you feel like you're screaming into a void and it reflects much less poorly on you than you might think
It took me way too long to learn the above in a work environment; I would be coy and modest about the work I had done, and all that happened was that my bosses would take me at my word and didn’t value the work I had done as a result, because I didn’t sell my work as having any value.
This woman is a notorious canceler, and I would like money but today I would be very happy if she cancels last minute.
Then my wife called me to tell me there was an active shooter at a business nearby, straight down the road. Did you hear about the workplace shooting in Illinois today? Yeah, it was that one. My wife was running the ICU at the nearest hospital. The first she heard about it was when someone from the hospital rushed in and told her there was an active shooter and they needed to clear as many beds as possible in the ICU for an unknown number of incoming patients. The person notifying them was in such a rush that they ended up thinking the shooter was in the hospital with them. It took a couple of minutes to clear that up, apparently. After moving patients that were stable enough to leave the ICU and clear some beds my wife headed to the ER to help coordinate, since patients there would likely end up coming to her next. 6 people died in the shooting, including the gunman. 5 police officers were wounded. She said the worst part of the afternoon wasn't even when she thought there was a shooter in her building, it was down there by the ER. It was just chaos, and patients were sent to at least 4 area hospitals. And the worst part was the desperate, panicked family members trying to find out if their loved ones were in that hospital or somewhere else. The wife of one of the police officers, in particular, stood out.
My wife ended up staying at the hospital for hours beyond the end of her shift. We skipped our dinner out. She went to tae kwon do for a while so she could hit something. We had a fairly quiet dinner at home and I tried to help her vent. She talked about moving to another country, and that's not so outlandish given her medical background and having already uprooted from one country to another when she was a teenager. We might try to go out tomorrow night instead, but we'll see. She's working in the same ICU again tomorrow and being there is going to keep her anger and frustration burning. I'll just do my best to be an outlet for her as needed and take it from there.