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The Happy Puppy [chat] Thread

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    AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Good point.

    AbsoluteZero on
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    AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Fuck. Now I want some cake.

    Thanks a lot, Obo.

    AbsoluteZero on
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    _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    It's not insecurities, ege, it's my acknowledged issues of days passing by while I skitter back and forth between medicines and doctors and houses and circumstances.

    I'd rather be exploring the space between people and places than the words "extenuating" and "prohibitive," "inhibitory" and "mutually-exclusive." There's not a lot of interesting ground that I've been covering, and when I see people who are having a grand old time just grinding up their Warlock being explicitly ridiculed I cannot help but seethe a little at the self-important snots who so desperately want to drive that person to feeling just that much more worthless.

    People like that have shit on me all my life, ege, and watching it play out in the necessarily slow-motion of a forum just makes it unbearable. Let them eat cake if they want cake! We advocate so many laissez faire policies on this board, why do some of the same people get stuck up on delineating and cordoning in the most important one?

    Was that Warlock part directed at me?

    _J_ on
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    IncenjucarIncenjucar VChatter Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    I was speaking strictly of giving it. Sorry.

    Giving it in the ass -definitely- has nothing to do with orientation.

    I've no personal experience, but my understanding is that it would usually be tighter (virgin-like), it would have more of the forbidden feeling, it is linked to dominance, it's an additional location of pleasurable sensations, and it's not going to get anyone pregnant.

    It's not much different than a more potentially unsanitary version of oral sex, with less teeth.

    --

    Oro: Aren't you still a -teenager-? If so. Re-fucking-lax.

    My life barely existed before I was 22.

    Incenjucar on
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    OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    anal sex is ridiculously painful, large penises are a bane before they're ever a boon, and in my experience homosexual sex is an exercise not unlike the board game Perfection

    EDIT: i'd love some damn cake, it's always a good time for cake

    Oboro on
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    MeizMeiz Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Yeah, if I was omnipotent, the first thing I'd do is make a planet rotating around in a solar system and put it way out in the middle of fucking nowhere amongst other solar systems with huge balls of gas rotating around them.

    Then I'd put shit on that planet to fuck with other shit. Like mosquitoes and taxes.

    Meiz on
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    ege02ege02 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    It's not insecurities, ege, it's my acknowledged issues of days passing by while I skitter back and forth between medicines and doctors and houses and circumstances.

    I'd rather be exploring the space between people and places than the words "extenuating" and "prohibitive," "inhibitory" and "mutually-exclusive." There's not a lot of interesting ground that I've been covering, and when I see people who are having a grand old time just grinding up their Warlock being explicitly ridiculed I cannot help but seethe a little at the self-important snots who so desperately want to drive that person to feeling just that much more worthless.

    People like that have shit on me all my life, ege, and watching it play out in the necessarily slow-motion of a forum just makes it unbearable. Let them eat cake if they want cake! We advocate so many laissez faire policies on this board, why do some of the same people get stuck up on delineating and cordoning in the most important one?

    The best way to deal with judgmental people is to ignore them, not whine about them in [chat] threads.

    ege02 on
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    _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    large penises are a bane before they're ever a boon

    damn it.

    _J_ on
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    MeizMeiz Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Or you can confront them when they're being pretentious, self-important, pseudo-intellectual assholes.

    Edit: then ignore them.

    Meiz on
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    IncenjucarIncenjucar VChatter Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    _J_ wrote: »
    Oboro wrote: »
    large penises are a bane before they're ever a boon

    damn it.

    Girl I know used to date stereotypically-endowed black guys as a fetish of hers.

    Now she -bitches- about how irritating said endowments were to, er, use.

    So if I ever flash her, I'm totally making sure to go swimming first.

    Incenjucar on
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    OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    ege02 wrote: »
    Oboro wrote: »
    It's not insecurities, ege, it's my acknowledged issues of days passing by while I skitter back and forth between medicines and doctors and houses and circumstances.

    I'd rather be exploring the space between people and places than the words "extenuating" and "prohibitive," "inhibitory" and "mutually-exclusive." There's not a lot of interesting ground that I've been covering, and when I see people who are having a grand old time just grinding up their Warlock being explicitly ridiculed I cannot help but seethe a little at the self-important snots who so desperately want to drive that person to feeling just that much more worthless.

    People like that have shit on me all my life, ege, and watching it play out in the necessarily slow-motion of a forum just makes it unbearable. Let them eat cake if they want cake! We advocate so many laissez faire policies on this board, why do some of the same people get stuck up on delineating and cordoning in the most important one?

    The best way to deal with judgmental people is to ignore them, not whine about them in [chat] threads.
    do you not understand you are doing now exactly what you were called out for doing, and then denied

    What people widely interpret as my whining is just par-for-the-course conversation for me. My comment and feelings were corroborated, and I was pretty well off done with it until you galumphed in here to defend yourself.

    I'll gladly keep at it, too, because I'm so absolutely starved for maek poast that I'll do it about anything. If it's not this, it's me "pity-mongering" by recounting my day-to-day events, and invoking the ire of Dynagrip or someone else.

    I mean, it's lose-lose for me either way.

    Or, I can quote more craigslist responses into [chat]!

    I think we all know what the right answer is.

    Oboro on
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    _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    ege02 wrote: »
    Oboro wrote: »
    It's not insecurities, ege, it's my acknowledged issues of days passing by while I skitter back and forth between medicines and doctors and houses and circumstances.

    I'd rather be exploring the space between people and places than the words "extenuating" and "prohibitive," "inhibitory" and "mutually-exclusive." There's not a lot of interesting ground that I've been covering, and when I see people who are having a grand old time just grinding up their Warlock being explicitly ridiculed I cannot help but seethe a little at the self-important snots who so desperately want to drive that person to feeling just that much more worthless.

    People like that have shit on me all my life, ege, and watching it play out in the necessarily slow-motion of a forum just makes it unbearable. Let them eat cake if they want cake! We advocate so many laissez faire policies on this board, why do some of the same people get stuck up on delineating and cordoning in the most important one?

    The best way to deal with judgmental people is to ignore them, not whine about them in [chat] threads.
    do you not understand you are doing now exactly what you were called out for doing, and then denied

    What people widely interpret as my whining is just par-for-the-course conversation for me. My comment and feelings were corroborated, and I was pretty well off done with it until you galumphed in here to defend yourself.

    I'll gladly keep at it, too, because I'm so absolutely starved for maek poast that I'll do it about anything. If it's not this, it's me "pity-mongering" by recounting my day-to-day events, and invoking the ire of Dynagrip or someone else.

    I mean, it's lose-lose for me either way.

    Or, I can quote more craigslist responses into [chat]!

    I think we all know what the right answer is.

    Cake!

    _J_ on
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    IncenjucarIncenjucar VChatter Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    _J_ wrote: »
    Cake!

    God. Today was horrible.

    There were two very delicious cakes. One was a carrot cake with tons of icing, the other was this fancy-as-hell super chocolate thing with gigantic chocolate ..er... substance... shavings on top about twice as high as the cake itself.

    But I couldn't have any.

    Diets are cruel.

    Incenjucar on
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    AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    anal sex is ridiculously painful, large penises are a bane before they're ever a boon, and in my experience homosexual sex is an exercise not unlike the board game Perfection

    EDIT: i'd love some damn cake, it's always a good time for cake

    I only tried it once and the girl said it felt like her ass was split in half like a lumberjack chopping a log. As a result it lasted all of 3 seconds and I honestly don't remember what it felt like for me. I was too distracted by the "EEEEP!!! Take it out!!"

    Also, all I have on hand is cheesecake. Cheesecake is certainly good, but it is not a cake.

    AbsoluteZero on
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    ege02ege02 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    do you not understand you are doing now exactly what you were called out for doing, and then denied

    No, I was hoping the subtlety would go right over your head.

    Seems like I underestimated you, Trebek!

    ege02 on
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    GimGim a tall glass of water Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Mmm, Tang. You are both tasty and evil, hence your tastiness.

    No, not vagina you bastards.

    Gim on
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    OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    all i can ask for out of life is enjoyment im an out doors guy i have a farm and raise horses
    im romantic and sentimental and i like nothing better than to curl up on the sofa, and cuddle and caress, because thats what makes the heart beat strongly and life worth living. inner beauty is what appeals to me ... I like that you are kinky as well and can be a sub in the bedroom becasue i can be very dominant and like BDSM where you would be totally controlled and made weak and helpless so your willingness to gladly take anything from bondage to violent S&M, humiliation, cumplay, rapeplay, roleplay would be perfect
    I am Dan. This is Dan. How's your day? I am so extremely busy. I didn't get chance to leave my desk for bathroom. Things are so crazy the past couple months. Hopefully things will be better afterward. I hope I am able to catch-up the work before my co-workers start to take the vacations. It's raining this morning did you bring the umbrella? Take care. Can I see your cosplay pictures?

    Oboro on
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    IncenjucarIncenjucar VChatter Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Also, all I have on hand is cheesecake. Cheesecake is certainly good, but it is not a cake.

    Dude, you... you really should research that before even trying it.

    There's, like, rules, on how to not split asses.



    ..

    Look, women tell me things, okay.

    Incenjucar on
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    _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    anal sex is ridiculously painful, large penises are a bane before they're ever a boon, and in my experience homosexual sex is an exercise not unlike the board game Perfection

    EDIT: i'd love some damn cake, it's always a good time for cake

    I only tried it once and the girl said it felt like her ass was split in half like a lumberjack chopping a log. As a result it lasted all of 3 seconds and I honestly don't remember what it felt like for me. I was too distracted by the "EEEEP!!! Take it out!!"

    Also, all I have on hand is cheesecake. Cheesecake is certainly good, but it is not a cake.

    Blarg.

    My ex girlfriend completely fucked me up.

    We didn't have sex, because i'm that way, but she would always talk about when she had sex with other guys. And on and on and god fucking damn it.

    _J_ on
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    MeizMeiz Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    I don't know.

    "What if I were to put my dick in your butt?" never came up in any of my conversations with ex's.

    Meiz on
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    _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Meiz wrote: »
    I don't know.

    "What if I were to put my dick in your butt?" never came up in any of my conversations with ex's.

    I wasn't asking if I could. We were talking about "past experiences" (which seems to always be a mistake) and she started talking about it.

    Blarg.

    _J_ on
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    IncenjucarIncenjucar VChatter Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    _J_ wrote: »
    We didn't have sex, because i'm that way, but she would always talk about when she had sex with other guys. And on and on and god fucking damn it.

    I've found the best way to get a woman to stop talking about sex is to put something in her mouth.



    Just make sure she's not a biter.


    Goddamn my finger hurt after that.

    Incenjucar on
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    AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    I did! I totally did. It is probably not koscher to go into details so I won't, but suffice to say that I did everything in my power not to cause ass-splitting pain.

    AbsoluteZero on
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    _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    all i can ask for out of life is enjoyment im an out doors guy i have a farm and raise horses
    im romantic and sentimental and i like nothing better than to curl up on the sofa, and cuddle and caress, because thats what makes the heart beat strongly and life worth living. inner beauty is what appeals to me ... I like that you are kinky as well and can be a sub in the bedroom becasue i can be very dominant and like BDSM where you would be totally controlled and made weak and helpless so your willingness to gladly take anything from bondage to violent S&M, humiliation, cumplay, rapeplay, roleplay would be perfect
    I am Dan. This is Dan. How's your day? I am so extremely busy. I didn't get chance to leave my desk for bathroom. Things are so crazy the past couple months. Hopefully things will be better afterward. I hope I am able to catch-up the work before my co-workers start to take the vacations. It's raining this morning did you bring the umbrella? Take care. Can I see your cosplay pictures?

    The last two are scary and the first one probably has sex with those horses.

    I like the "Can I see your cosplay pictures?" in that 3rd post. That's classy.

    _J_ on
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    ege02ege02 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    _J_ wrote: »
    Oboro wrote: »
    anal sex is ridiculously painful, large penises are a bane before they're ever a boon, and in my experience homosexual sex is an exercise not unlike the board game Perfection

    EDIT: i'd love some damn cake, it's always a good time for cake

    I only tried it once and the girl said it felt like her ass was split in half like a lumberjack chopping a log. As a result it lasted all of 3 seconds and I honestly don't remember what it felt like for me. I was too distracted by the "EEEEP!!! Take it out!!"

    Also, all I have on hand is cheesecake. Cheesecake is certainly good, but it is not a cake.

    Blarg.

    My ex girlfriend completely fucked me up.

    We didn't have sex, because i'm that way, but she would always talk about when she had sex with other guys. And on and on and god fucking damn it.

    What, do you always start talking about the semantics and implications behind the word "sex" every time you are about to start having it?

    ege02 on
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    IncenjucarIncenjucar VChatter Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    I did! I totally did. It is probably not koscher to go into details so I won't, but suffice to say that I did everything in my power not to cause ass-splitting pain.

    So you took a week or two of practice with smaller insertion materials?

    Incenjucar on
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    MikeManMikeMan Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    hay guys i heer best not to uze lube mirite

    MikeMan on
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    _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    ege02 wrote: »
    _J_ wrote: »
    Oboro wrote: »
    anal sex is ridiculously painful, large penises are a bane before they're ever a boon, and in my experience homosexual sex is an exercise not unlike the board game Perfection

    EDIT: i'd love some damn cake, it's always a good time for cake

    I only tried it once and the girl said it felt like her ass was split in half like a lumberjack chopping a log. As a result it lasted all of 3 seconds and I honestly don't remember what it felt like for me. I was too distracted by the "EEEEP!!! Take it out!!"

    Also, all I have on hand is cheesecake. Cheesecake is certainly good, but it is not a cake.

    Blarg.

    My ex girlfriend completely fucked me up.

    We didn't have sex, because i'm that way, but she would always talk about when she had sex with other guys. And on and on and god fucking damn it.

    What, do you always start talking about the semantics and implications behind the word "sex" every time you are about to start having it?

    It wasn't a semantic thing. It was supposed to be a romantic thing. But it mostly just turned out to be a very, very crappy thing.

    _J_ on
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    OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    i figure that someday someone will be nice enough to use some sort of lubricant

    but for now i am 0/2

    only 1/2 on blood though, so i guess i'm out of the running for "totally fucking fucked over"

    Oboro on
    words
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    _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    MikeMan445 wrote: »
    hay guys i heer best not to uze lube mirite

    Weren't you going to sleep?

    _J_ on
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    OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    MikeMan445 wrote: »
    hay guys i heer best not to uze lube mirite
    People die.

    We need public education about the importance of lubricant in anal intercourse or play now. I demand it!

    Won't someone please think of the Oboro?!

    Oboro on
    words
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    IncenjucarIncenjucar VChatter Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Seriously man, lube is a like a requirement. If the ass is making its own, -you maybe shouldn't be in there-.

    --

    _J_: Wait. She wanted sex, and you refused? Oh gods man. That's... that's like saying she's fat and ugly. You poor fuck you.

    --

    Seriously. Lube.

    Incenjucar on
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    _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    MikeMan445 wrote: »
    hay guys i heer best not to uze lube mirite
    People die.

    We need public education about the importance of lubricant in anal intercourse or play now. I demand it!

    Won't someone please think of the Oboro?!

    If females just communicate these things it would all be a lot easier.

    It's like trying to go down on a girl while she's being self-conscious about it and won't give directions. That's not helping anyone involved.

    If the parties involved would just say, "Hey, THIS would make it better!" everyone could win.

    _J_ on
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    ElkiElki get busy Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    i figure that someday someone will be nice enough to use some sort of lubricant

    but for now i am 0/2

    only 1/2 on blood though, so i guess i'm out of the running for "totally fucking fucked over"

    dot dot dot

    How could you not use lube? My God.

    Elki on
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    OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    I've been told that I wasn't giving good enough head while he was fisting me in the ass.

    If I managed to hold my focus, he lost his and flinched, and would cause me all sorts of agony and cause me to flinch, which would cause him to be upset, which would get me upset, and

    there's a point where you stop saying "Hey, THIS would make it better!" and accept that some things require extensive practice or training from one or both parties or are just unreasonable requests.

    And yes, I realize I am shoehorning this into the conversation. It's the first I've actually talked in detail about what happened on Friday with Mister John Appleton, and goddamnit I'm getting it out of my system now for good.

    EDIT t Elks-- well, the one that drew blood was also technically rape (but I'd have a thread of people yelling at me for leading him on), and I was thankfully somewhat drugged.

    There is no feeling as horrible though as being alone in a bathroom, barely able to hold your head up, and moving the tissue in front of your face to just see this bloody, sticky, mess.

    Do you know that foreboding feeling of moisture from when you trip or whatever and scrape your knee beneath your pants, and you know when you roll up the leg you're going to be bleeding at least a little? That same feeling, inside of you.

    Oboro on
    words
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    IncenjucarIncenjucar VChatter Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited May 2007
    This is why it's nice that the women in my life and I have fairly open conversations about sex.

    Also because it is fairly amusing. Especially if you're good at forming mental images. ;-)

    --

    Fisting you in the... what the fuck, woman.

    Does he know you are not Lady Goatse?

    Incenjucar on
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    _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Incenjucar wrote: »
    _J_: Wait. She wanted sex, and you refused? Oh gods man. That's... that's like saying she's fat and ugly. You poor fuck you.

    She wanted to have sex because she was raped a week after we started dating. And before that happened we were all happy and snuggly and great, but then she was raped and wanted to have sex, but she wanted to use a condom, which is something she usually didn't do. So there was this whole psychological shit-storm surrounding it and a gigantic "I don't really want to have sex with you so much as I want to have sex and you are here" thing going on.

    It was terrifically terrible and complicated. I thought I was doing the right thing. I still don't know if I was.

    Hey, it's 1:47 a.m. and _J_ is talking about his ex girlfriend on the PA forums. GO TEAM.

    _J_ on
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    GimGim a tall glass of water Registered User regular
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    I've been told that I wasn't giving good enough head while he was fisting me in the ass.

    Good night, [chat]!

    Gim on
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    _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Oboro wrote: »
    I've been told that I wasn't giving good enough head while he was fisting me in the ass.

    If I managed to hold my focus, he lost his and flinched, and would cause me all sorts of agony and cause me to flinch, which would cause him to be upset, which would get me upset, and

    there's a point where you stop saying "Hey, THIS would make it better!" and accept that some things require extensive practice or training from one or both parties or are just unreasonable requests.

    And yes, I realize I am shoehorning this into the conversation. It's the first I've actually talked in detail about what happened on Friday with Mister John Appleton, and goddamnit I'm getting it out of my system now for good.

    What's neat is that the guys who fist girls in the ass can find girls to fist in the ass. But the guys who just want to...

    BLARG!!!

    _J_ on
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    OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited May 2007
    Incenjucar wrote: »
    Fisting you in the... what the fuck, woman.

    Does he know you are not Lady Goatse?
    From what I've experienced and heard second-hand about the dominating types, the tighter you are, the wider they want to get you. It's like some sort of sick extreme sport, except GoGurt hasn't made a TV spot based on it.

    Yet.

    Oboro on
    words
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