Saw my GP today, and it went very well. She's logged my changed name in their database as my preferred name, with a note to update it once I get my name changed legally. I really really like that the software a lot of GP clinics here use allows for doing that so easily.
Got a referral to a psychiatrist about ADD stuff, and general other mental health stuff, some updated prescriptions for my existing medication, and a new one for an actual anti-depressant we're going to try me on.
After we've sorted out that stuff it'll be time to talk about some anti-androgens or similar
After we've sorted out that stuff it'll be time to talk about some anti-androgens or similar
huminahuhwhat now? did we know about this! I knew about the name change but I didn’t that you were ready for The Next Stage, congratssssssssssss
ahaha well, it's more like the penultimate Stage for me. I think I mentioned this earlier this year! I suspect with a light dosage of AAs, and then some lasers on my face, plus some non-medical related stuff (weight loss, hair stuff, better fashion sense), I'll be at my desired level of gender: ??
I feel I fucked up with the psychiatrist because the test gave high results for interpersonal loyalty and I told her I do care a lot about their wellbeing
She now wants me to come out to them before I can start HRT but doing so might jeopardize my living situation before I can attain some sort of security by knowing I at least have access to anti-androgens and hormones
Have to think about whether a carrot dangling in front of my face gives me enough inner power to change my living situation, unfortunately what I heard from other people isn't good (one girl who came to the local trans meetup is a skilled carpenter and the job service straight up told her she wouldn't be "placeable" due to being trans)
Re: romantic relationships, they all assume I'll gravitate more towards lesbian relationships because I've never had sex with a man (never had sex with a woman either) or because they just assume things don't work out between dudes and trans women
I need to at least find a doctor who'll prescribe me finasteride, the one I talked to was averse to the idea because he felt it would be akin to getting started with HRT
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Erin The RedThe Name's Erin! Woman, Podcaster, Dungeon Master, IT nerd, Parent, Trans. AMABaton Rouge, LARegistered Userregular
It really frustrates me how many hurdles there are between someone realizing they're trans and being able to apply that knowledge to making their body a more comfortable vessel for them to inhabit.
I'm sorry that y'all are running into roadblocks and slow downs. You are real and you are valid. Frustration absolutely makes sense, and I understand wanting to get on the road, so to speak.
Also! Speaking of getting on the road:
Packed up and waiting for the rest of the house to wake up and be ready so we can head to Texas for my pre-op appointment today! Then surgery is Friday. Gonna do my best not to die! I will be really out of it, but feel free to hit me up on Twitter if you wanna talk or check in or whatever
I made an an appointment for HRT regardless and the earliest they could give me was 11 September
I also screwed myself here because I couldn't handle all these things earlier due to my anxiety
I feel bad for complaining since it's "only" 77 days but I had to wait five to six months for the psychiatric appointment, this has all been going on for way too long
Also the other local trans people say it wasn't like this last year, that it only took one month
They have five hours per month for HRT and I was told it was a basically a ten-minute job since they don't run their own labs and make you get everything yourself (they basically look at the stuff you brought and write down prescriptions)
I'm also worried about the quality of the care if things are developing like this, they told another trans woman to get back in six months
I put in so much time and effort and I'm crying because of all this shit
well they aren't pseudoscience but they are only really useful in their original intended usage as a screening tool for severely developmentally disabled/delayed individuals. And even in that case they are just a screening tool.
Regardless of all that the idea that a person needs to take an IQ test before receiving treatment for gender dysphoria is straight up bigotry. There's no justifiable medical reason for requiring it unless you hold that a person must take an IQ test before consenting to any kind of medical treatment.
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Erin The RedThe Name's Erin! Woman, Podcaster, Dungeon Master, IT nerd, Parent, Trans. AMABaton Rouge, LARegistered Userregular
Updat: I made it to the condo. Parked a very big car in a very small spot. Doctor looked at/held my dick. Had Tex Mex. Cut my foot open real good opening a gate. I have a drink now. Very fuzzy. Love yall
Started a new job this week. First day in orientation, they had everyone put their preferred pronouns on their name tags. Then, noticed that the men's restroom had a while bunch of sanitary pads and such.
It costs the company nothing basically, but it's nice to see the gesture at least
not to be contrarian but the foundation of modern society in many ways is being petty and shit talking people regardless of a given logic or reason attached. ideally? there's less maliciousness and being catty stays just that: being catty
this one has been making the rounds but im kinda thinking about the reagan era again and the prevailing norms around that time. and also the fact social media radicalization has been let out of the box and is never going back in the box. im no centrist but i believe deeply that a conversation needs to be had around deradicalizing irony poisoned and alienated young people sooner rather than later because the major tech companies only seem to stoke these fires while talking a big one about approaching these problems seriously
And honestly. . I am proud of the woman I have become against the struggles I had to overcome to get here.
Let them talk. It's not keeping me in a cage anymore and it's just the venom of their hearts which has more to do with their smallness and less to do with any truth about me.
Seidkona on
Mostly just huntin' monsters.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
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CambiataCommander ShepardThe likes of which even GAWD has never seenRegistered Userregular
Having nearly finished my stint on the grand jury, I have learned that people can both be catty bitches at strangers they just met AND ruin society at the same time, so I'm not really on board with the idea that being catty somehow saves society at large.
"If you divide the whole world into just enemies and friends, you'll end up destroying everything" --Nausicaa of the Valley of Wind
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Erin The RedThe Name's Erin! Woman, Podcaster, Dungeon Master, IT nerd, Parent, Trans. AMABaton Rouge, LARegistered Userregular
Final stretch, y'all. Liquid diet today and I just want a gotdamn croissant or burger. There's a Jamaican place a block away and it looks and smells incredible and just. Aaaagh
I also just realized that this dress they've had a lot longer is more or less the bi flag. I didn't notice since those are also "space" colors to me and I thought of this as the space dress:
The reasons this is my favorite dress shop are:
- come in a wide range of sizes, but also make dresses according to your unique measurements for only $10 extra
- Most all the dresses have pockets
- You can customize the dresses in ways other than just the sizing - for that same $10 you can add sleeves, change dress length, change neckline. You don't have to pay per customization, it's just $10 to change the dress as you like.
"If you divide the whole world into just enemies and friends, you'll end up destroying everything" --Nausicaa of the Valley of Wind
I'm about at a zen point with gender and sexuality. I accepted it's not going to fit into any neat boxes and I'm just going to have to forge a big gay path into the unknown.
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CambiataCommander ShepardThe likes of which even GAWD has never seenRegistered Userregular
I was watching a Vice interview today of a suburban mom, and she was wearing a t-shirt with a cardigan over it. The t-shirt had writing on it but was partially blocked by the sweater, so for a long time it looked like her shirt said, "world's gayest mom" and I was like "cool." Only for it to be revealed later that it only said, "world's okayest mom."
Please fund my kickstarter to make "world's gayest mom" t-shirts, ty.
"If you divide the whole world into just enemies and friends, you'll end up destroying everything" --Nausicaa of the Valley of Wind
Saw my psychologist today! Towards the end of the session I just casually told him straight up that I'm nb and he was like 'yeah?' as if he already knew, which is intensely funny to me because he keeps being far more perceptive about things than I expect. I guess this is why he's so good that I keep going back to see him.
But yeah, no shock, no gatekeeping, no asking me to clarify it or anything, just instant acceptance and acknowledgement. Talking about whether to be semi-public about it he just said 'do it, be you'
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Brovid Hasselsmof[Growling historic on the fury road]Registered Userregular
I went to a wildflower identification workshop yesterday. At one point the instructor was talking about plants with male flowers and plants with female flowers, and then referred to 'transgender' flowers that exhibit some combination of traits. It was clearly intended as a joke.
I can't decide if I want to email and say something about it. It was such a minor thing. I can't tell if it's actually a problem or if I'm just so hypersensitive to anyone whose character I'm not sure of even mentioning transgender that I'm putting too much into it.
Posts
And I hope I can get an appointment to start HRT afterwards - fingers crossed that I don't have to wait another 3+ months
I've been doing worse and worse again lately because of the gatekeeping and my general irritation with my body and being in the closet
Got a referral to a psychiatrist about ADD stuff, and general other mental health stuff, some updated prescriptions for my existing medication, and a new one for an actual anti-depressant we're going to try me on.
After we've sorted out that stuff it'll be time to talk about some anti-androgens or similar
huminahuhwhat now? did we know about this! I knew about the name change but I didn’t that you were ready for The Next Stage, congratssssssssssss
ahaha well, it's more like the penultimate Stage for me. I think I mentioned this earlier this year! I suspect with a light dosage of AAs, and then some lasers on my face, plus some non-medical related stuff (weight loss, hair stuff, better fashion sense), I'll be at my desired level of gender: ??
She now wants me to come out to them before I can start HRT but doing so might jeopardize my living situation before I can attain some sort of security by knowing I at least have access to anti-androgens and hormones
Have to think about whether a carrot dangling in front of my face gives me enough inner power to change my living situation, unfortunately what I heard from other people isn't good (one girl who came to the local trans meetup is a skilled carpenter and the job service straight up told her she wouldn't be "placeable" due to being trans)
It's so backwards
The personality test is super-awful because it produces results akin to what you'd read in a horoscope based on very few data points
No one should tell you how you transition or handle your body and life.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
I also screwed myself here because I couldn't handle all these things earlier due to my anxiety
Really angry
I'm sorry that y'all are running into roadblocks and slow downs. You are real and you are valid. Frustration absolutely makes sense, and I understand wanting to get on the road, so to speak.
Also! Speaking of getting on the road:
Packed up and waiting for the rest of the house to wake up and be ready so we can head to Texas for my pre-op appointment today! Then surgery is Friday. Gonna do my best not to die! I will be really out of it, but feel free to hit me up on Twitter if you wanna talk or check in or whatever
I feel bad for complaining since it's "only" 77 days but I had to wait five to six months for the psychiatric appointment, this has all been going on for way too long
Also the other local trans people say it wasn't like this last year, that it only took one month
They have five hours per month for HRT and I was told it was a basically a ten-minute job since they don't run their own labs and make you get everything yourself (they basically look at the stuff you brought and write down prescriptions)
I'm also worried about the quality of the care if things are developing like this, they told another trans woman to get back in six months
I put in so much time and effort and I'm crying because of all this shit
I cannot believe how these things are done here
Regardless of all that the idea that a person needs to take an IQ test before receiving treatment for gender dysphoria is straight up bigotry. There's no justifiable medical reason for requiring it unless you hold that a person must take an IQ test before consenting to any kind of medical treatment.
It costs the company nothing basically, but it's nice to see the gesture at least
3DS Friend Code: 3110-5393-4113
Steam profile
Great. They can all sit around and talk about how "weird" I am and how much they don't condone my "choices"
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
hey, fuck them!
People who have interesting shit to say, and their own thoughts, generally don't gossip.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2019/06/24/lgbtq-acceptance-millennials-decline-glaad-survey/1503758001/?fbclid=IwAR1dJYjsLKK4gZKShcNjrM68AzgwDxJbaHHZTfi5sY3nBO-V8hyh1QnsxUY
this one has been making the rounds but im kinda thinking about the reagan era again and the prevailing norms around that time. and also the fact social media radicalization has been let out of the box and is never going back in the box. im no centrist but i believe deeply that a conversation needs to be had around deradicalizing irony poisoned and alienated young people sooner rather than later because the major tech companies only seem to stoke these fires while talking a big one about approaching these problems seriously
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
Let them talk. It's not keeping me in a cage anymore and it's just the venom of their hearts which has more to do with their smallness and less to do with any truth about me.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
https://www.eshakti.com/shop/Dresses/Ombre-star-print-georgette-shoulder-ties-dress-CL0065969
It's currently on sale, too!
Need. . .
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
https://www.eshakti.com/shop/Dresses/Ombre-star-print-georgette-pleated-empire-dress-CL0065999
I also just realized that this dress they've had a lot longer is more or less the bi flag. I didn't notice since those are also "space" colors to me and I thought of this as the space dress:
https://www.eshakti.com/shop/Dresses/Ombre-star-print-georgette-shoulder-ties-dress-CL0051148
And another version of that dress with sleeves:
https://www.eshakti.com/shop/Dresses/Ombre-star-print-georgette-surplice-midi-dress-CL0057942
The reasons this is my favorite dress shop are:
- come in a wide range of sizes, but also make dresses according to your unique measurements for only $10 extra
- Most all the dresses have pockets
- You can customize the dresses in ways other than just the sizing - for that same $10 you can add sleeves, change dress length, change neckline. You don't have to pay per customization, it's just $10 to change the dress as you like.
I like it a lot.
E: They also didn't have the sleeve version when I ordered, if I remember right. I would probably prefer that one to the strap one.
Please fund my kickstarter to make "world's gayest mom" t-shirts, ty.
But yeah, no shock, no gatekeeping, no asking me to clarify it or anything, just instant acceptance and acknowledgement. Talking about whether to be semi-public about it he just said 'do it, be you'
I can't decide if I want to email and say something about it. It was such a minor thing. I can't tell if it's actually a problem or if I'm just so hypersensitive to anyone whose character I'm not sure of even mentioning transgender that I'm putting too much into it.