[Kids] are the best of times, the worst of times

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  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    Ellie's 4 and hasn't spent a night away from us yet either.

    I don't trust Ecco's parents and they're not involved anyways, and my parents are on the other side of the planet.

    it's just not been a thing that's been possible.

  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    I am so grateful for my parents, brother in law and sister in law, who all enjoy having Little King stay with them for a night or a few days. I wouldn't be able to to cope with my partner's depression without them. :(

  • honoverehonovere Registered User regular
    We wanted to go to Greece next month so my wife's friends and family over there could meet our girl. With how it looks right now her family is trying to make a little video with my wife's grandparents so our daughter might have something of them if she never meets them before they're gone. It's depressing and hitting my wife pretty hard.

    With the pregnancy and and then Corona we haven't been to her home for over a year.

  • Mojo_JojoMojo_Jojo Like a bad lobster in a dark cellar Registered User regular
    Burpette has been away to her grandparents in France a good few times without us. It's pretty great as she lives it and we get to take care of stuff you can't do with a small child around (cleaning the oven! Taking stuff to the charity shop without drama! Sleeping until 7am!)

    Weirdly she's never stayed over with my parents, who are much closer (a 3.5hour drive north). It's just never come up.

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  • RanlinRanlin Oh gosh Registered User regular
    Ours is about to be 7 and hasn't spent a night away from us.

    We...don't have particularly good, reliable friends or family in the area.

  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    Same here. My parents are not involved and the in laws are already primary caregivers for my nieces and nephew.

    One thing we did the first two years is each of us took a solo vacation. Wasn't ideal, but it was nice for me to go visit my brother and sleep in at a hotel and then my wife went to Sonoma with friends.

    I am in the business of saving lives.
  • Kayne Red RobeKayne Red Robe Master of Magic ArcanusRegistered User regular
    Called out sick because Lorelei refused to sleep last night and Mrs. Red Robe consequently has a migraine. This morning the little terror is behaving great of course. Still not sleeping though.

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  • PantsBPantsB Registered User regular
    edited May 12
    Before quarantine, we had a good system with my in-laws or my mother watching Patrick (13 months now) about once a week each when my wife worked a weekday (12 hr shifts roughly 2x a work week plus every 3rd weekend averaging to 30 hrs a week). I've been taking days off to watch him when she has been going in, and occasionally just not doing work, but we might have to bring the grandparents back in soon. They haven't seen him from closer than 10-15 feet in 2 months now after seeing him at least once or twice a week for the rest of his life, and I only have so many hours.

    A funnier story- a few weekends back my wife was working so I was solo Dadding it. Patrick is a big kid (99%... if he was 5 months older), so I didn't want to carry him out to let the dogs in from our fenced in yard. It's only like 15 feet from the porch so it would be fine, right? My little dog has even jumped back over the almost 6 foot fence from the neighbors from playing with their dog to come in. Thirty seconds after putting him down in the living room, I'm turning back to come in.

    As we get to the door, it slams shut. My child has crawled the length of the house and slammed the door on us, locking us out. I have no phone and no keys.

    I then scramble around the house twice with my dogs confused and following, wanting to go in or go back to playing. I was finally able to put a patio chair under the only unlocked window, and barely haul myself in as Patrick giggles and claps.

    My wife did not think it was funny. I have now hidden a spare key in the yard.

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  • DisruptedCapitalistDisruptedCapitalist rugged, weathered Registered User regular
    edited May 12
    That's the problem with kids. Just when you think you've outsmarted them, they surprise you.

    Like when my youngest figured out how to bypass the child safety lock on the frontdoor and let herself out. Her babysitters still can't figure out that lock but she has it down pat.

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  • KalnaurKalnaur I See Heat Waves . . . Centralia, WARegistered User regular
    Within the past few weeks my son has figured out how to untie the ties we use to now tie the baby gates because before the quarantine he'd already figured out the entire locking mechanism for them. And his tiny, tricky little fingers just undo knots with the greatest of ease, unless there's like 20 knots all together.

    So now he's interested in dragging a chair over and climbing over the (intentionally) unclimbable gates.

    Toddlers, uh, find a way.


    My inlaws are no longer alive, my dad I haven't seen in over two decades, so it's just my mom as far as grandparents, and she's chronically ill. Besides one of my wife's cousins and my sister, we really don't have anyone my wife trusts with our kiddo ATM, so he's been babysat a total of twice in three years, and never overnight.

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  • sponospono Mining for Nose Diamonds Registered User regular
    Oh jeez, the boy just recently figured how to open the interior doors

    Just when we were getting the upper hand with that locking trash can too...

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  • mrpakumrpaku Registered User regular
    Tiny Wonder has figured out how to disable the child locks on all the doors with some patience, how to unstick the gate upstairs through sheer physical strength, frequently takes it upon himself to let the dog in and out through the twice-locked back door (and will decide it's time for her to come in by standing at the back door, clapping and yelling unintelligibly at her like he is her Boss), and occasionally will let himself outside to go sit on the swing and acts confused about why we don't think that's okay. He is a delightful little menace

    The kids have had sleepovers with my parents back when we talked to them, and my wife's parents whenever they're here, and have a regular babysitter who's stopped by to wave at them a few times during all this but hasn't ever watched them overnight. We were literally about to take our Florida trip right before all *waves frantically*, and my ongoing hopeful fantasy to get me through all this is the day I can leave them supervised with some in laws and can go wade in the beach and not have to think or worry about them getting sick for thirty-plus minutes

    Elvenshae
  • MulysaSemproniusMulysaSempronius but also susie nyRegistered User regular
    My kids are 4 and 6, and have not spent overnight away from us. We don't even get babysitters very often. They do daycare, school and summer camps, but outside of our working hours they're generally with us. My mil is older and has problems taking care of them for long periods of time. And my parents live several states away.
    But this summer, if summer camps are not being held, we're making plans on sending them to my parents. My parents don't work, and we're probably going to have to go in ourselves one or twice a week. Without camp, we'd have a lot of issues. Also, they have a big backyard ( as opposed to our small apartment). I'm hoping it doesn't come to that, but

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  • FishmanFishman Good night, Westley; good work. Sleep well, I'll most likely kill you in the morning. Registered User regular
    edited May 13
    My parents decided this year to have one of their grandkids for a sleepover each month, on a rotational basis.
    My oldest was trying to schedule his to coincide with European football finals, which usually occur at 6am local time.

    Obviously the whole thing is out the window with lockdown, but even losing one kid for a night makes the whole weekend much easier to deal with.


    My kids have definitely been missing their grandparents during lockdown. They usually each get to go on an outing with my parents once a week and then also all their cousins and uncles at the family dinner most weekends; my wife's parents also usually do an outing with the two boys together on the weekends. So a couple months ago they were basically seeing at least one set of grandparents most days of the week, which just instantly reduced to nothing. Fortunately restrictions ease tomorrow and my wife's parents have already booked themselves in to take both boys up the coast to the beach where they live.

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  • MNC DoverMNC Dover Game Designer/Stay-at-home Dad Kirkland, WARegistered User regular
    My daughter loves staying the night at grandma's house, because she gets to eat and do whatever she wants. She's actually been there since Saturday. They both missed each other greatly and they'd both been almost non-stop isolated for weeks so we figured it was safe.

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  • Banzai5150Banzai5150 Registered User regular
    My sister, who always offered to watch Kate if we were closer, will watch Kate for us if we ask. We just don’t like to put people out by asking very often. My mother, who lives across the street from my sister, asks to watch Kate quite often and they both enjoy it. But since my Mother is the prime “at risk” age, we’ve not had Kate visit during this time. Though my mom will come by once a week and drop off some fast food or ice cream for the kids and have a little visit with them while she sits in her car, which is nice. Of course my Sister took her family and my Mom to St Pete beach to go to PJ’s over the weekend since the lockdown is no longer in effect. Makes me wanna slap my sister.

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  • TaramoorTaramoor Storyteller Registered User regular
    Our six-year-old asked if she could do her math homework alone. She’s doing it on an app prescribed by the teacher and it produces usage and speed statistics and such.

    We forgot, however, that one of the triplets had dragged a baby monitor into the room she was using for privacy.

    “Siri, what’s 18 - 7?”
    ...

    So... new rule.

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  • FishmanFishman Good night, Westley; good work. Sleep well, I'll most likely kill you in the morning. Registered User regular
    edited May 13
    The children are out of the house. Repeat, the children are out of the house.


    ... what is this sound? That thing, where there's no crying or shrieking or squealing or crashes or breaks or complaining or the constant constant unending questions and interruptions? I know it's got a name... Sil-something?

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  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    Monday.

    Monday I will be able to answer your question, Fishman.

  • joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    Is it weird that on kid #4 I can smell the poop in their diaper and know the exact shape, consistency, and volume that awaits me before I even get in there?

    #weirdsuperpowers

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  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    I had a solid delivery of "Clever girl..." When we saw Ripley open the baby gate for th first time.

    I got no reaction because my wife was raised without tv or movies and has a pop culture void a mile wide.

    I was more upset I didn't get a strong response to my line than our baby is now free roaming.

    I am in the business of saving lives.
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  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    Is anyone here reading more of a book book with their kid, like at night or w/e, as opposed to still doing a board book every night, and what age did ya'll start if you are. Books are such a huge part of who I am, and I really want to start sharing them with my daughter, but I pretty sure she just doesn't have the attention span for it. I think my dad probably started with The Hobbit when I was around 5, but that just seems like such a long wait.

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  • kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    Brody wrote: »
    Is anyone here reading more of a book book with their kid, like at night or w/e, as opposed to still doing a board book every night, and what age did ya'll start if you are. Books are such a huge part of who I am, and I really want to start sharing them with my daughter, but I pretty sure she just doesn't have the attention span for it. I think my dad probably started with The Hobbit when I was around 5, but that just seems like such a long wait.

    I read the Dresden Files to my daughter when she was a few months old. I uhh. Don't think that counts, though :P

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  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    we're doing more picture books now. Like the Little Critter books, or the Mandela Effect Bears books. I had bought some chapter books to see fi she was ready to have a chapter a night, but not yet.

    We've been doing the bigger/longer picture books pretty much since she's been 2.5/3?

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  • DisruptedCapitalistDisruptedCapitalist rugged, weathered Registered User regular
    edited May 16
    we're doing more picture books now. Like the Little Critter books, or the Mandela Effect Bears books. I had bought some chapter books to see fi she was ready to have a chapter a night, but not yet.

    We've been doing the bigger/longer picture books pretty much since she's been 2.5/3?

    Ask your daughter how the name is spelled. Perhaps at a young age children are still capable of observing both realities.

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  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    I read the Dragon series by Patricia Wrede when Ripley was a baby but now it's all picture and simple books cause she wants to participate.

    I can't wait until her reading has improved so I can read full books to her.

    I am in the business of saving lives.
  • Banzai5150Banzai5150 Registered User regular
    edited May 16
    Brody wrote: »
    Is anyone here reading more of a book book with their kid, like at night or w/e, as opposed to still doing a board book every night, and what age did ya'll start if you are. Books are such a huge part of who I am, and I really want to start sharing them with my daughter, but I pretty sure she just doesn't have the attention span for it. I think my dad probably started with The Hobbit when I was around 5, but that just seems like such a long wait.

    I was JUST thinking about this last night while reading a book to my daughter. And I was thinking if I could get a decent Illustrated version she might actually enjoy it. She’s 4.5 right now and her attention to things is about 30 seconds if she doesn’t have something to look at. As it is, she climbs on me like a jungle gym while I read her her books anyway. I would like to get to reading her something a little longer but I feel it’s probably a while out still.

    Edit: just found The Wiggles on Netflix. I think I was more excited than her as she said “I’ve watched this already”.

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  • ArdArd Registered User regular
    Brody wrote: »
    Is anyone here reading more of a book book with their kid, like at night or w/e, as opposed to still doing a board book every night, and what age did ya'll start if you are. Books are such a huge part of who I am, and I really want to start sharing them with my daughter, but I pretty sure she just doesn't have the attention span for it. I think my dad probably started with The Hobbit when I was around 5, but that just seems like such a long wait.

    My oldest is four and started showing interest in the book I was reading a few months ago so I started reading him the hobbit. We got up to the wood elves after a few weeks before he stopped asking for it every night.

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  • KetarKetar Come on upstairs we're having a partyRegistered User regular
    Brody wrote: »
    Is anyone here reading more of a book book with their kid, like at night or w/e, as opposed to still doing a board book every night, and what age did ya'll start if you are. Books are such a huge part of who I am, and I really want to start sharing them with my daughter, but I pretty sure she just doesn't have the attention span for it. I think my dad probably started with The Hobbit when I was around 5, but that just seems like such a long wait.

    I read The Wild Robot to my kids around a year and a half ago, I think. A few chapters per night depending on length. They would have been 6/7 and 4 at the time. Not quite as stimulating as The Hobbit, but my son's 3rd grade teacher read it to his class over the course of several months this year. It's listed for ages 8-12 online and is almost 300 pages long. It went really well - any night that we got to bed late and didn't have time to read they would both be in or close to tears because they wanted more, and they would always beg for "just one more chapter" every time I would call it a night.

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  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    We had Ellie's best friend and his family over for dinner tonight. First time she's seen him since his birthday party, about 7 weeks ago.

    There were some re-entry issues. Not wanting to play together. "I'm scared to play with Him!" Why? "I don't know how to do it! I don't know how to play with him!"

    But eventually, they bonded over the doll house and my My Little Ponies, and the dump truck and race cars. And then they had dinner together and then jell-o for dessert and then they watched Moana a bit and when he left, he left his matchbox race car here with her so that when he came back to play he could play with it and they could defeat the monster together.

    Overall, it was encouraging.

    Please, please let Monday be ok.

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  • ArdArd Registered User regular
    edited May 16
    Ard wrote: »
    Brody wrote: »
    Is anyone here reading more of a book book with their kid, like at night or w/e, as opposed to still doing a board book every night, and what age did ya'll start if you are. Books are such a huge part of who I am, and I really want to start sharing them with my daughter, but I pretty sure she just doesn't have the attention span for it. I think my dad probably started with The Hobbit when I was around 5, but that just seems like such a long wait.

    My oldest is four and started showing interest in the book I was reading a few months ago so I started reading him the hobbit. We got up to the wood elves after a few weeks before he stopped asking for it every night.

    Welp, related, this apparently hasn't gone away. They were just playing in the guest bedroom, and my oldest ran out to attack mommy, and, in his words "we're goblins, we're escaping back to goblintown", which was the blanket on the bed in the bedroom.

    Ard on
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  • TaramoorTaramoor Storyteller Registered User regular
    Ard wrote: »
    Ard wrote: »
    Brody wrote: »
    Is anyone here reading more of a book book with their kid, like at night or w/e, as opposed to still doing a board book every night, and what age did ya'll start if you are. Books are such a huge part of who I am, and I really want to start sharing them with my daughter, but I pretty sure she just doesn't have the attention span for it. I think my dad probably started with The Hobbit when I was around 5, but that just seems like such a long wait.

    My oldest is four and started showing interest in the book I was reading a few months ago so I started reading him the hobbit. We got up to the wood elves after a few weeks before he stopped asking for it every night.

    Welp, related, this apparently hasn't gone away. They were just playing in the guest bedroom, and my oldest ran out to attack mommy, and, in his words "we're goblins, we're escaping back to goblintown", which was the blanket on the bed in the bedroom.



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  • ArdArd Registered User regular
    Yeah we did a viewing of that movie a few weeks ago. He actually made it most of the way through on one sitting.

  • mageormikemageormike Registered User regular
    1 Week from start of potty training, and the little guy has started to resist prompting. Also wants to get up from the potty almost immediately once we get him to sit down.
    Reading the "Oh Crap" potty training book, it seems like I might have been over-prompting him a bit and sounded nagging. I need to back off a bit with the "it's potty time now!", maybe once per hour? I was trying to have him go every thirty minutes before. Reading books seems to work to have him sit on there, but he hasn't pee'd so far today. Super frustrated but trying to be understanding and patient as best I can.

  • schussschuss Registered User regular
    mageormike wrote: »
    1 Week from start of potty training, and the little guy has started to resist prompting. Also wants to get up from the potty almost immediately once we get him to sit down.
    Reading the "Oh Crap" potty training book, it seems like I might have been over-prompting him a bit and sounded nagging. I need to back off a bit with the "it's potty time now!", maybe once per hour? I was trying to have him go every thirty minutes before. Reading books seems to work to have him sit on there, but he hasn't pee'd so far today. Super frustrated but trying to be understanding and patient as best I can.

    What helped us is that our prompts are transition based, so before screen time/car/outside, they go pee. It gets less resistance as you can say things like "you don't want to have to stop playing outside to go potty do you?" And they agree. We had no luck with purely time based prompts either

    Aldo
  • mageormikemageormike Registered User regular
    Unfortunately he’s a little speech delayed and those kinds of questions are a little early for him. We can still try more during transitions though. Thanks!

  • BeastehBeasteh THAT WOULD NOT KILL DRACULARegistered User regular
    My niece is 3 weeks old now

    xetcb27tpzm2.jpeg

    She's a cutie and I hope to see her as soon as the lockdown is over

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  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    Sids toys in Toy Story 1 is some real nightmare fuel

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  • m!ttensm!ttens Registered User regular
    Sleep rant
    Our daughter has been an amazing sleeper pretty much her whole life, up until about 4 nights ago. I think it has something to do with her napping (or lack thereof) schedule. She had been a good 2 nap per day kid, and in the before times, the long long ago, her daycare was starting to transition to 1 nap per day. That didn't work great when we started shelter in place so we moved back to 2 per day and everything was fine up until this week. On Wednesday she wanted to stay up until after lunch, then it was a bit of a trial to get her down but then she slept from 12:30 to almost 3:00. Thursday was okay, she did 2 brief naps, one in the morning and one shortly after lunch. Friday was another weird one, she fell asleep early (10:30 am) and slept until almost 1:00. Today has been a nightmare where she has been acting tired but refusing to nap all day until eventually she passed out on the couch next to me for 45 minutes this afternoon and has been screaming (since we put her to bed 90 minutes ago. Thought she might still be hungry so we got her another cup of milk and read some stories and did some snuggles but she went from quiet and pleasant to rage screaming as soon as I put her into her crib :bigfrown:

    please send help

  • MNC DoverMNC Dover Game Designer/Stay-at-home Dad Kirkland, WARegistered User regular
    edited May 17
    My daughter is 4.5 now and has been getting pretty bossy lately. She has to be reminded to say please, laughs and looks away when I’m talking to her, and that general stuff. Part of me says she’s 4 and empathy hasn’t set in yet.

    Earlier today, we were playing in the sunroom. We store some puzzle pieces and cars in large ziplock bags. I turned to see my daughter put the ziplock bag over my son’s head.

    Immediately I got it off and started yelling at her. She kept laughing, smiling, and squirming away and not looking at me. I tried repeatedly to get her to focus, but she just wouldn’t listen. Finally, I told her something and she said, “ok, you’re in charge” in a very dismissive voice.

    That set me to anger level 9. I countered with a “do you want to go to your room!” and she screamed “No don’t say that!” That was it, I yanked her up and carried her upstairs and put her in her room.

    Being alone in her room is the worst for her. She really only responds with guilt feelings when I get super angry like that, probably because it doesn’t happen often.

    Can some of the parents out there with older kids please tell me this is a common phase at this age. The non-listening thing is so frustrating. I don’t want to say my kid has ADD or whatever, and it’s just how kids are at this age.

    Sorry for the rant post. I’m just coming down from the anger and frustration of watching the kids all day. Typing it all out here just...helps. Thanks!

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