Kids/Parenting: It’s fine, everything is fine.

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  • RickRudeRickRude Registered User regular
    So my daughter came out of the womb with some legions on her knee. Doctors weren't worried figured she scratched herself in the womb or bit herself. Wasn't worried.

    Flash forward 4 months. It hasn't healed. We see a dermatologist. He's worried it could be Incontinentia pigmenti. We have a biopsy next week.

    Long story short, if she has it, she's likely to go blind and have central nervous system problems. Praying it's something else, but I'm an absolute wreck right now who can't stop tears from falling down. I feel like a horrible parent

  • AimAim Registered User regular
    Wishing you good luck on the results.

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  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited February 2020
    Dang, I really hope it turns out to be something completely ignorable and benign!

    Mm, wish I had had better insurance for my births. First was complication-free vaginal hospital birth, second was an even shorter and easier homebirth. I paid around $8,000 out of pocket for the first and $6,000 or so for the second.

    The bill that most irked me was the $4,500 out-of-pocket from the OB who never actually ended up attending the birth. That bill was for the total ‘care’ he provided me throughout the pregnancy which was actually 6 x 5 minute appointments in which he told me nothing useful. I got 100% of my information about pregnancy and birth from mom chat groups.

    Janson on
  • RickRudeRickRude Registered User regular
    Aim wrote: »
    Wishing you good luck on the results.

    Just wanted to say thank you for this and all the agrees. It may be silly but it means a lot. Right now just trying to remember this is worst case scenario, it could be something else, and if it is, it doesn't change anything. She's my little princess and I'm going to do everything in my power to raise.her to be a bad bitch.

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  • MegaMan001MegaMan001 CRNA Rochester, MNRegistered User regular
    Just to chime in on sleep training, nothing works for everyone and every family is different.

    With that side, you'll likely have
    urahonky wrote: »
    Thanks for the responses everyone. It sounds like we do roughly the same thing. My wife ended up going in there and calming her down after 45 minutes. We have a rule that if one of us sends them into timeout then they are the only ones to get them out.

    I think if she doesn't get enough of an outlet she gets like this.... And with the weather being so cold it's impossible for her to burn it out of her. Shortly after she came out and apologized to everyone she was back to normal. Ate plenty of dinner and slept well.

    This is a goddamn landmark victory and I do sincerely hope you celebrated like out of a 50s news reel with cigars and brandy.

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  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    edited February 2020
    RickRude wrote: »
    Aim wrote: »
    Wishing you good luck on the results.

    Just wanted to say thank you for this and all the agrees. It may be silly but it means a lot. Right now just trying to remember this is worst case scenario, it could be something else, and if it is, it doesn't change anything. She's my little princess and I'm going to do everything in my power to raise.her to be a bad bitch.

    Its amazing how often we as parents jump to, or focus on, the absolute worst-case-scenario possible. My youngest had a persistent cough for a week that eventually became so bad he was coughing hard enough to vomit. My brain jumped straight to "he's going to be hospitalized due to pneumonia or lung cancer" for some ungodly reason. Yeah, it was just an upper respiratory infection, doc gave him some cough medicine and antibiotics, cough went away after another week.

    God willing you'll be telling a similar story a few months from now, Rick!

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  • CarpyCarpy Registered User regular
    Capt Howdy wrote: »
    RickRude wrote: »
    Aim wrote: »
    Wishing you good luck on the results.

    Just wanted to say thank you for this and all the agrees. It may be silly but it means a lot. Right now just trying to remember this is worst case scenario, it could be something else, and if it is, it doesn't change anything. She's my little princess and I'm going to do everything in my power to raise.her to be a bad bitch.

    Its amazing how often we as parents jump to, or focus on, the absolute worst-case-scenario possible. My youngest had a persistent cough for a week that eventually became so bad he was coughing hard enough to vomit. My brain jumped straight to "he's going to be hospitalized due to pneumonia or lung cancer" for some ungodly reason. Yeah, it was just an upper respiratory infection, doc gave him some cough medicine and antibiotics, cough went away after another week.

    God willing you'll be telling a similar story a few months from now, Rick!

    Dealt with this over Christmas, the baby caught bronchiolitis and was doing that same cough until he vomited thing. Ended up with doctors visits on both Christmas Eve and Christmas day plus a nebulizer for a couple weeks. So many sleepless nights where he had to be held upright all night because of mucus build up.

  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    Those nebulizers work miracles. I mean, it sucks trying to get a 5 year old to sit still for 15 minutes to breathe that stuff in, and it makes my youngest hyper as hell , but I can't argue with the results. Luckily they make little mask attachments so he can pretend to be Darth Vader.

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  • R-demR-dem Registered User regular
    My little critter turned 3.
    We currently survive on a diet of Cheetos, bananas, and milk, and request a bath at least twice a day.
    She has decided that she is a dog. She will happily chase you around on all fours, woofing at you and licking you. She plays fetch.
    She started preschool, which is apparently far more fun than hanging out at home with Mom and Dad and readily abandons us for.
    I have seen every episode of Oddbods and Paw Patrol more times than I can count. Everything is Paw Patrol. Trike, backpack, socks, water bottle, you name it. If it's got a doggo with a hat on it, she's all for it.

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  • CauldCauld Registered User regular
    Our oldest kid just got accepted to our preferred preschool. The only hangup is that he was put into the afternoon class. We would prefer morning since he usually takes a pretty long nap in the afternoon (2+ hours right now). He'll have just turned 3 when school starts in September, so I would think he'll still be napping then. Not really sure how we're going to handle the change.

  • kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    Cauld wrote: »
    Our oldest kid just got accepted to our preferred preschool. The only hangup is that he was put into the afternoon class. We would prefer morning since he usually takes a pretty long nap in the afternoon (2+ hours right now). He'll have just turned 3 when school starts in September, so I would think he'll still be napping then. Not really sure how we're going to handle the change.

    You can always see how he does without a nap before September? Maybe it'll be an easier adjustment than you're fearing?

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  • CauldCauld Registered User regular
    kime wrote: »
    Cauld wrote: »
    Our oldest kid just got accepted to our preferred preschool. The only hangup is that he was put into the afternoon class. We would prefer morning since he usually takes a pretty long nap in the afternoon (2+ hours right now). He'll have just turned 3 when school starts in September, so I would think he'll still be napping then. Not really sure how we're going to handle the change.

    You can always see how he does without a nap before September? Maybe it'll be an easier adjustment than you're fearing?

    That's basically my plan. We have plenty of time to adjust and kinda ease into things. The only issue is that if he doesn't nap I assume he'll either go to bed earlier or get up later. Either one of those would cut out a lot of the time I spend with him.

    kime
  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    You could try waking him up earlier and the trying to introduce an earlier nap.

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  • Jebus314Jebus314 Registered User regular
    Daycares and naps are the worst. I mean, it 100% makes sense that they are trying to homogenize everyone's schedule. I totally get it. But we have a later schedule that works really well for us, and it is basically the exact opposite of what they want (she should be napping when they want her awake and vice versa). So we basically have to adjust our entire day around when the daycare wants to provide naps.

    Or at least we will have to very soon. Currently she is young enough that they claim she can nap whenever, but basically she just ends up with terrible schedules on daycare days.

    Seriously though, why do most families want their kid to get up at like 6 am? Everything about that seems terrible. Our kid gets up at 8 and it is so great. More time with her after work. Less stress in the morning. I will miss our great schedule when it's stripped from us.

    "The world is a mess, and I just need to rule it" - Dr Horrible
  • MulysaSemproniusMulysaSempronius but also susie nyRegistered User regular
    It's the law around here that places provide naps for kids up to age 4 (?). If they won't nap, they have to be quiet during nap time.
    My kids stopped taking naps long before that. And my son gets into (minor) trouble, since he is almost incapable of being quiet for a long block of time. So that's fun when his teachers let me know what he tries to do instead.
    It's like, not all kids need the same thing. I know they have their hands tied, but

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  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    Age 4! My eldest stopped napping for me before she even turned 2, it was horrible. If she had attended a preschool like that she’d have absolutely been constantly in minor trouble.

    She’s always slept 2-4 hours less than the recommended period for her age; now that she’s 7 she often sleeps only as long as I do! (She goes to bed an hour earlier, but often wakes up an hour earlier, too). But after years of doing all I can I’ve accepted she’s just one of those people who needs less sleep (and we don’t see any health or behavioural issues).

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  • DisruptedCapitalistDisruptedCapitalist screaming Registered User regular
    edited March 2020
    Same with my eldest. She gets by just fine on 8 hours of sleep ever since she was 5. If we advanced her bedtime or delayed her bedtime she'd still sleep only 8 hours. So we eventually came to accept it.

    Edit: of course I should mention that now she's a teenager and sleeping in a lot more.

    DisruptedCapitalist on
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  • CauldCauld Registered User regular
    Man, I would estimate my 2 yr old sleeps an average of 12 hrs a day. Typically he'll fall asleep between 8:30 - 9 and get up between 6-6:30 and then a nap of at least 2 and up to 4 hrs.

    Capt Howdy
  • urahonkyurahonky Dayton, OHRegistered User regular
    Kind of gross but does anyone have any suggestions on keeping my 5 year old son from picking his nose and eating it? I call him out on it all the time amd have tissues always available but he just does it out of habit.

    The problem is that he's been sick twice the last month and when he gets sick then so do I.

  • ChaosHatChaosHat Trick of the lightRegistered User regular
    urahonky wrote: »
    Kind of gross but does anyone have any suggestions on keeping my 5 year old son from picking his nose and eating it? I call him out on it all the time amd have tissues always available but he just does it out of habit.

    The problem is that he's been sick twice the last month and when he gets sick then so do I.

    Pick your nose and then make him eat it.
    Line his nostrils with a bitterant.
    Tell him he's not leaving the dinner table until he eats this whole carton of boogers in front of you.
    Dress up as his favorite cartoon character and talk about how none of the ninja turtles? would want boogers on their pizza.
    Dress up as his least favorite cartoon character/person and describe how enjoyable booger picking is and what a great thing it is to do.
    Get an invisible fencing company to put a tiny collar on his finger and tiny fencing around his nose.
    Debooger him yourself regularly, cutting off the supply.
    Tiny nose muzzle.
    Chinese finger trap.
    Install a mesh screen over the nostrils like you do for windows.

    This took me like five minutes. Pick your favorite! I like the eat the booger carton one because like where do you even get that!

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  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    ChaosHat wrote: »
    This took me like five minutes. Pick your favorite! I like the eat the booger carton one because like where do you even get that!

    Mashed potatoes and food coloring.

  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    You could rub his fingers with habaneros. This will have the added effect of making him not rub his eyes, which is a good practice with all these bugs and viruses going around.

    He'll have to pee without his hands, but you can't have everything.

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  • ChaosHatChaosHat Trick of the lightRegistered User regular
    Capt Howdy wrote: »
    You could rub his fingers with habaneros. This will have the added effect of making him not rub his eyes, which is a good practice with all these bugs and viruses going around.

    He'll have to pee without his hands, but you can't have everything.

    Easy solve teach him to plank on the toilet. Core workout too.

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  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    I like that line of thought. Physical fitness is very important for children.

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  • shadowaneshadowane Registered User regular
    urahonky wrote: »
    Kind of gross but does anyone have any suggestions on keeping my 5 year old son from picking his nose and eating it? I call him out on it all the time amd have tissues always available but he just does it out of habit.

    The problem is that he's been sick twice the last month and when he gets sick then so do I.

    A slightly more serious answer is there isn't really a way to get him to stop directly, but reminding him not to do it and getting tissues is probably your best bet in curtailing the behavior as he gets older.

    Rich on Beer - I talk about drinking beer. You read about it.
  • ChaosHatChaosHat Trick of the lightRegistered User regular
    shadowane wrote: »
    urahonky wrote: »
    Kind of gross but does anyone have any suggestions on keeping my 5 year old son from picking his nose and eating it? I call him out on it all the time amd have tissues always available but he just does it out of habit.

    The problem is that he's been sick twice the last month and when he gets sick then so do I.

    A slightly more serious answer is there isn't really a way to get him to stop directly, but reminding him not to do it and getting tissues is probably your best bet in curtailing the behavior as he gets older.

    I mean I don't know how lining their nostrils with a bitterant isn't a serious answer! I don't know where you get it from though. You could maybe pulverize a bunch of Switch cartridges into dust.

  • NobeardNobeard North Carolina: Failed StateRegistered User regular
    edited March 2020
    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eating_mucus

    A few years ago I heard something about booger eating possibly having beneficial effects on the immune system by exposing the immune system to pathogens and allergens, thus strengthening it and teaching it what allergens do and do not deserve an immune response. My research led me to that wikipedia page. While it doesn't tell you how to get kids to stop eating boogers, it is interesting in general. As for the potential health benefits of eating boogers, I don't immediately dismiss it out of hand. Training the immune system by exposing it to pathogens is the foundation of all vaccines. The theory has not been scientifically tested and peer reviewed, though, so it's probably quackery.

    Nobeard on
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  • Jebus314Jebus314 Registered User regular
    shadowane wrote: »
    urahonky wrote: »
    Kind of gross but does anyone have any suggestions on keeping my 5 year old son from picking his nose and eating it? I call him out on it all the time amd have tissues always available but he just does it out of habit.

    The problem is that he's been sick twice the last month and when he gets sick then so do I.

    A slightly more serious answer is there isn't really a way to get him to stop directly, but reminding him not to do it and getting tissues is probably your best bet in curtailing the behavior as he gets older.

    Yeah I would say the critical step missing is reinforcing the good behavior. So you need to constantly be having him blow his nose with a tissue, or use the tissue to pick his nose, or whatever. This needs to be done on a regular basis, before he would pick his nose on his own. That way he is building a habit of using tissue, instead of just relying on his old habit and then trying to remember at the last second to do something different.

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  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    edited March 2020
    Nobeard wrote: »
    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eating_mucus

    A few years ago I heard something about booger eating possibly having beneficial effects on the immune system by exposing the immune system to pathogens and allergens, thus strengthening it and teaching it what allergens do and do not deserve an immune response. My research led me to that wikipedia page. While it doesn't tell you how to get kids to stop eating boogers, it is interesting in general. As for the potential health benefits of eating boogers, I don't immediately dismiss it out of hand. Training the immune system by exposing it to pathogens is the foundation of all vaccines. The theory has not been scientifically tested and peer reviewed, though, so it's probably quackery.

    Living in squalor and eating spoiled food also have beneficial immune effects, for the same reason - exposing the immune system to more things, because it is primarily reactive and not proactive. Doesn't mean I'd recommend either one as a lifestyle change.

    Hevach on
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  • urahonkyurahonky Dayton, OHRegistered User regular
    That's interesting! I assumed that since everything is telling us to wash our hands and to avoid eyes/nose/mouth touching that eating boogers would be a bad thing haha. But I'll just keep going with what I'm doing. I put a box of tissues next to him everywhere he goes just so he can grab em.

  • NobeardNobeard North Carolina: Failed StateRegistered User regular
    urahonky wrote: »
    That's interesting! I assumed that since everything is telling us to wash our hands and to avoid eyes/nose/mouth touching that eating boogers would be a bad thing haha. But I'll just keep going with what I'm doing. I put a box of tissues next to him everywhere he goes just so he can grab em.

    Yea with coronavirus it"s much more imperative to stop booger eating and nose picking than usual.

    I'm not saying we are going to have an autocratic dystopia, but things keep happening that look like they come from an autocratic dystopia.
  • NobeardNobeard North Carolina: Failed StateRegistered User regular
    Hevach wrote: »
    Nobeard wrote: »
    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eating_mucus

    A few years ago I heard something about booger eating possibly having beneficial effects on the immune system by exposing the immune system to pathogens and allergens, thus strengthening it and teaching it what allergens do and do not deserve an immune response. My research led me to that wikipedia page. While it doesn't tell you how to get kids to stop eating boogers, it is interesting in general. As for the potential health benefits of eating boogers, I don't immediately dismiss it out of hand. Training the immune system by exposing it to pathogens is the foundation of all vaccines. The theory has not been scientifically tested and peer reviewed, though, so it's probably quackery.

    Living in squalor and eating spoiled food also have beneficial immune effects, for the same reason - exposing the immune system to more things, because it is primarily reactive and not proactive. Doesn't mean I'd recommend either one as a lifestyle change.

    Penicillin comes from mold. Therefore, the moldier the food, the more healthy it is. It's simple scientificking.

    I'm not saying we are going to have an autocratic dystopia, but things keep happening that look like they come from an autocratic dystopia.
    Brody
  • RickRudeRickRude Registered User regular
    Biopsy on our daughter was done today. Was excruciating watching it be done. Now we have to wait up to two weeks. I'm going to be a wreck

  • quovadis13quovadis13 Registered User regular
    Hoping for the best man. Good luck

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  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    urahonky wrote: »
    That's interesting! I assumed that since everything is telling us to wash our hands and to avoid eyes/nose/mouth touching that eating boogers would be a bad thing haha. But I'll just keep going with what I'm doing. I put a box of tissues next to him everywhere he goes just so he can grab em.

    Would eating boogers be any less healthy than picking your nose to begin with? Like, aren't you just potentially transferring germs from one place in your body to another place in your body?

    I would assume that once you're mining nose gold, the damage is done.

    As to getting him to stop it, my kids had all sorts of gross habits that they grew out of once they started caring what others thought. Reinforce good behavior and all, but your kid might just be That Kid for a little while. No big, a lot of kids are That Kid at some point.

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  • Ninja Snarl PNinja Snarl P My helmet is my burden. Ninja Snarl: Gone, but not forgotten.Registered User regular
    Just do what my parents did: tell them it's disgusting and then never ever ever actually spend the time and effort showing them to blow their nose decently. Then you can look forward to years of them still doing it but just hiding it from you until they figure out what tissues are for; you won't have to deal with it, which is the same as having actually dealt with it properly in the first place.

    But seriously, it's one of those thing they'll have to grow out of a bit and you just gotta kinda keep on them about blowing their nose until they give up on the nosepicking. Five is a bit young to get why it's gross because pretty much anything gross is funny at five anyway. Just don't shame them about it or else they seriously will just hide it from you without fixing the behavior, which is obviously not helpful. They shouldn't need to be too much older before they figure out that it's way better to use a tissue over getting nasty crap on their hands and clothes.

  • electricitylikesmeelectricitylikesme Registered User regular
    Hello parenting thread.

    Bulgarian girl just had a positive pregnancy test. This is a good result as we have been deliberately trying. I'm happy but also in the middle of low-grade freaking out. I assume this is normal.

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  • CauldCauld Registered User regular
    Hello parenting thread.

    Bulgarian girl just had a positive pregnancy test. This is a good result as we have been deliberately trying. I'm happy but also in the middle of low-grade freaking out. I assume this is normal.

    bolded basically sums up my feelings since my wife got pregnant (oldest is 2.5 now)

    schuss
  • RickRudeRickRude Registered User regular
    OMG I'm about to lose my mind. I had to move in with my parents about a year ago or so. My kid is 4 months. My brother is with a girl with 3 kids from a previous relationship or 2, and has a kid with him who is about 16 months. My nephew. They had to move in about 6 months ago or so.

    I get yelled at for every little thing when my nephew is sleeping. Even if I sneeze i feel the wrath of my parents. But when my little girl is sleeping, those 3 brats are loud as fuck, my nephew is doing whatever and yelling, doors get slammed, adults are loud. It's just fucking frustrating. I'm a middle child and it feels like it's the same old shit 39 years later. Everything I do is wrong, but my little brother, he's a fucking angel. Silence in the house for my nephew, but fuck my little girl. Who may have a serious condition.

    I could go on and would like to, just wanted to vent. Got woken up by the kids and my brother being loud, which woke up my daughter, which woke up me. And this is a regular thing.

    God I miss my own house.

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  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    RickRude wrote: »
    OMG I'm about to lose my mind. I had to move in with my parents about a year ago or so. My kid is 4 months. My brother is with a girl with 3 kids from a previous relationship or 2, and has a kid with him who is about 16 months. My nephew. They had to move in about 6 months ago or so.

    I get yelled at for every little thing when my nephew is sleeping. Even if I sneeze i feel the wrath of my parents. But when my little girl is sleeping, those 3 brats are loud as fuck, my nephew is doing whatever and yelling, doors get slammed, adults are loud. It's just fucking frustrating. I'm a middle child and it feels like it's the same old shit 39 years later. Everything I do is wrong, but my little brother, he's a fucking angel. Silence in the house for my nephew, but fuck my little girl. Who may have a serious condition.

    I could go on and would like to, just wanted to vent. Got woken up by the kids and my brother being loud, which woke up my daughter, which woke up me. And this is a regular thing.

    God I miss my own house.

    Being extra tired certainly doesn't help being stressed about shit.

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