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Kids/Parenting: It’s fine, everything is fine.

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  • Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    edited September 2019
    Brody wrote: »
    tbloxham wrote: »
    enc0re wrote: »
    My little girl is 18 months old. This is the year for us to decide if we will have a second. So far we are leaning "no" (maybe 60% lean) mostly because we have a great, easy-going kid and our life is busy but really good and fun. I'm worry about upsetting that balance, taking the risk of a second kid, and then maybe it isn't so fun anymore. I can't help but think of when we went from one dog to two. The workload basically doubled but the enjoyment only went up a bit. After all how much more fun is it to play with two dogs as opposed to one? Also, our first dog is super easy while the second one requires a much firmer hand to stay in line.

    Of course I've asked for advice from my friends, but all of them have two kids (and one has four). Human brains and rationalization being what they are, they are all team two kids. So how about you all? Are there any posters of team one and done? I would love to hear your thoughts. And of course anyone else's that wants to chime in.

    Two kids is not actually twice the work of one, but, that's because you can trim all the fact off the first kids parenting strategy and get twice the amount done without twice the work.

    Effectively the decision you have to make is,do you want to be a ringmaster, or a clown. If you have two then if they are close in age for the first like 10 years of their lives they will play together, and your job will be to keep that play safe and happy. If you have one, then you will have to get involved and help create the games.

    Two kids are also an emotional support network for each other in ways that will be hard for you to achieve. There is an inherent trust between children when they are young (assuming you create a positive and nurturing environment) that can help, and your child can have a home life that doesn't revolve entirely around you.

    But, two kids are double the chance of needing a sick day. Double the time spent helping with homework. Double the burden on the solo parent if you decide to have one of you go and do an activity.

    I mean, I hate to be stereotypical, but if you have an easy going girl and you get a middle of the road boy, he's going to burst through your happily ordered life like an atom bomb.

    I don't understand why you're writing this so authoritatively. There's a lot here I disagree with. Our kids are spaced pretty close together, and while there are some great times where they entertain each other, that didn't really start until #1 was maybe 4 or 5? And even now, with ages 8, 6, 5, there's still plenty of friction and varying interest/capabilities for different games (#1 loves to play board games but #2 often struggles to understand the mechanics involved and then #1 gets frustrated. Or #1 and #2 will go outside to play kickball and #3 wants to play but she gets frustrated that she can't kick as well as her brothers and throws a fit).

    On top of that, two kids, especially in the early years, means chasing one toddler around while holding an infant. Or putting one kid down for nap and instead of getting to nap yourself, having to go deal with the other kid that's been waiting for your attention all day. Double the chances of a kid getting sick, or not sleeping well that night. Double the chances that one just has a shitty day for whatever reason.

    And then of course, you hit school and they start getting old enough to do things like go over to a friend's house without you or get dropped off for a birthday party alone, and wait you still have these other kids to either entertain or take to their own activities. So I don't really agree.

    Yeah, but aren't you also on record as stating that 3 kids wasn't enough, and you won't be happy until your children blot out the sun?

    Oh yeah, I love my kids and I would have more if porp was on board, but going from 1 to 2 was definitely a huge jump in work/effort. Going from 2 to 3 much less so. The biggest thing with going from 2 to 3 was all the damn activities starts to really add up when you have, say, 3 kids in soccer, 3 kids doing swim lessons, 2 kids in dance, 1 in gymnastics, etc etc

    That and whenever you try to do something fun and special as a family, the odds of one of them acting up starts to approach 100%

    Sir Landshark on
    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
    spool32
  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    I mean, we are preparing to work on our second. I sometimes think we are crazy, but we're still planning on going a head with it.

    "I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."

    The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson

    Steam: Korvalain
    RedTidespool3238thDoeNitsua
  • enc0reenc0re Registered User regular
    edited September 2019
    As to the original question, why did you have the first kid? And are those reasons still there, or are you pretty satisfied?

    A mix of factors, in no particular order: Having a next generation exist. Wanting to fully experience life and raising a child is part of that. My wife and I having super lives and there was time and space for a little one. Love for each other and the idea of creating a new being made of our DNA. Passing on our perspectives. Having a family to do things together.

    The benefit of all of these goes up with number 2. But so does the cost.

    enc0re on
  • MulysaSemproniusMulysaSempronius but also susie nyRegistered User regular
    Two kids is a lot of work. It is especially hard when the youngest starts out colicky and keeps going full-bore while you're trying to keep the older kid engaged in their own activities so they aren't steamrolled by their younger sibling. Both of our kids are great, but our eldest is definitely lower-maintenance. Two is more than twice as hard as one, I'd say, because you have to engage them separately on their own terms, and that gets difficult when they are very young. We separate them a lot, with one parent per child, and they have fun playing by themselves or with us. But get them together, and it's more work keeping them from fighting. Youngest is 3, so we're seeing a lot more of them playing together as he gets older. But we're not quite at the age where we can tell them to just go play together yet.
    I wouldn't have more than one kid for the benefit of the first kid, though. Have two kids (or more) if you feel you can take care of more, and want more. There's no guarantee they will get along, or that they will get anything out of it that they wouldn't get out of hanging out with other kids in school or the neighborhood.

    If that's all there is my friends, then let's keep dancing
    enc0re
  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    There's a LOT of variables. I think a big one is how close together they are in age. Mine are just far enough apart that they won't be in the same school year. They're in the same age group for toys, they like the same things (different favorites but enough overlap to avoid arguments).

    And they're just about synchronized in sizes so every couple months Sam's closet goes into Tony's closet and Tony's goes in the donate/give away/sell box but if one of them randomly insists on wearing THAT SHIRT THAT ONE THAT ONE it doesn't matter, it all fits well enough. Tony always wants to do exactly what Sam does, so he weaned earlier, walked earlier, big boy bed earlier, started potty training earlier, etc - everything earlier and with less effort because once his big brother does something, he's excited to try, too, so we never have to motivate him.

    So, overall, it's a lot less than twice the work. But for the same reasons it's more than twice the chaos. It's never one kid underfoot, it's two. It's never one kid banging pots and pans, its the other one, too. It's never one kid drawing on the walls, its both of them. Nothing is ever just the one.

    Elvenshaeenc0retbloxhamLoisLane
  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    We are one and done.

    Ellie is now 3.5 and I sometimes do have guilty feelings that she does not have a her own playmate in the house. It would relieve my husband of some of his time that she spends attached to him, because he is her playmate.

    The primary reason we are only 1 child though, is me. I hated being pregnant. Hated it. I hated the disbelief from other people when they looked at my already obese body and didn't see the 'bump'. I hated the pain in my hips and pelvis from about 3 months until the end. I hated the gestational diabetes and taking metformin and then insulin (ok I didn't hate the insulin as much as the metformin). I hated the pain of being pregnant, the misery, the fear, the anxiety. I hated feeling the baby kick. Hated it. I hated having this parasite that was controlling my life. I hated not being able to properly roll over in bed without having to wake up first. I hated my childbirth classes, I hated my delivery options, I hated the hospital ward and everything about my stay in hospital. I hated the spinal headache that I got from the epidural. I hated the inability to breastfeed, the expectation to breastfeed. I hated being a cow on call for this stupid machine that sucked milk out of me. I hated the first 5 months of my child's life. I was miserable. I hated the hormonal shift that took about 2 years to figure out that turned me into a raving maniac once a month.


    so, I just try to remind myself of that anytime that stupid biological ticking kicks in and makes me think about a 2nd. I do not want to go through all of that again. I don't want to put my husband through all of that again. I don't want to put my daughter through all of that. We have a nice balance, a good world that works for the 3 of us.

    So, it's mostly me being selfish as hell not wanting a 2nd, but I wouldn't do it again.

    enc0reJaysonFourEvermourn
  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    We are one and done.

    Ellie is now 3.5 and I sometimes do have guilty feelings that she does not have a her own playmate in the house. It would relieve my husband of some of his time that she spends attached to him, because he is her playmate.

    The primary reason we are only 1 child though, is me. I hated being pregnant. Hated it. I hated the disbelief from other people when they looked at my already obese body and didn't see the 'bump'. I hated the pain in my hips and pelvis from about 3 months until the end. I hated the gestational diabetes and taking metformin and then insulin (ok I didn't hate the insulin as much as the metformin). I hated the pain of being pregnant, the misery, the fear, the anxiety. I hated feeling the baby kick. Hated it. I hated having this parasite that was controlling my life. I hated not being able to properly roll over in bed without having to wake up first. I hated my childbirth classes, I hated my delivery options, I hated the hospital ward and everything about my stay in hospital. I hated the spinal headache that I got from the epidural. I hated the inability to breastfeed, the expectation to breastfeed. I hated being a cow on call for this stupid machine that sucked milk out of me. I hated the first 5 months of my child's life. I was miserable. I hated the hormonal shift that took about 2 years to figure out that turned me into a raving maniac once a month.


    so, I just try to remind myself of that anytime that stupid biological ticking kicks in and makes me think about a 2nd. I do not want to go through all of that again. I don't want to put my husband through all of that again. I don't want to put my daughter through all of that. We have a nice balance, a good world that works for the 3 of us.

    So, it's mostly me being selfish as hell not wanting a 2nd, but I wouldn't do it again.

    I don't think its selfish. It is your body, it is your experience.

    "I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."

    The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson

    Steam: Korvalain
    kimeAimDisruptedCapitalistJaysonFourCauldkijunshiurahonky38thDoeCalicaNitsua
  • SummaryJudgmentSummaryJudgment The purity of angry tambourine. Registered User regular
    everyone has such an individualized reaction to it, and combined with a lot of after-the-fact rationalizing about decision making, I'm taking opinions both ways about 1 vs 2 kids with a grain of salt

    I guess we're at the point that, hey, if we had a special needs child, we'd be utterly destroyed now that we know how hard a normal (good, even!) kid is

    Because survival is insufficient.
  • tbloxhamtbloxham Registered User regular
    edited September 2019
    The only reason I raised my experience is that one of the truisms of parenting I've seen is that two is more than twice as hard as one, and my experience and those of most of the parents I know where they shared work was that it definitely wasn't. For two kids who are about the same level of challenge, having two was not twice as hard, because you are much better at parenting and are already working so hard that you just have to accept giving them less each. But, then that just makes you aware of all the pointless stuff you did for the first one.

    The difference between kids however easily overrides this. You have to consider your first, and your level of parenting sharing, and that will inform your personal experience of going 1 to 2 much more accurately.

    tbloxham on
    "That is cool" - Abraham Lincoln
  • AimAim Registered User regular
    I have three kids, I usually tell people that the first one took about 70% of our free time, and the second another 70%.
    Somehow, the third.one felt easier than the second one. Experience, maybe.

  • tbloxhamtbloxham Registered User regular
    You know how I know sexism is alive and well in the country, my sons school is having a bake sale next month, and they are looking for volunteers to make cakes and cookies (or even to buy them). I live in a very liberal area of the country, but, the list for bake sale volunteers looks like this.

    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Me (Man)
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman

    I'm like, is this a list from 1955 of bake sale volunteers?

    "That is cool" - Abraham Lincoln
  • ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    Blow them away with your culinary expertise.

    WiiU: Windrunner ; Guild Wars 2: Shadowfire.3940 ; PSN: Bradcopter
  • navgoosenavgoose Registered User regular
    My wife was staunchly against a single child because she is certain Only Children are all worse off for it.

    But we both wanted max 2 so we have 2.

    Going from 1 to 2 about 2.5 years apart was approximately double the work. Some things benefit from economy of scale but others seem compounded in difficulty.

    DisruptedCapitalistenc0re
  • CelestialBadgerCelestialBadger Registered User regular
    My kid’s school had a bake sale and chili competition on the same day. Presumably to encourage dads to get involved.

  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    You could make chili and bake some nice cornbread to go with it.

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  • CelestialBadgerCelestialBadger Registered User regular
    Capt Howdy wrote: »
    You could make chili and bake some nice cornbread to go with it.

    Funny enough there was homemade cornbread to buy!

    ElvenshaeBrodyCapt HowdyShadowfireJaysonFourSummaryJudgment
  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    navgoose wrote: »
    My wife was staunchly against a single child because she is certain Only Children are all worse off for it.

    But we both wanted max 2 so we have 2.

    Going from 1 to 2 about 2.5 years apart was approximately double the work. Some things benefit from economy of scale but others seem compounded in difficulty.

    Yeah, we are hoping to stop at two, but my mother-in-law is a fraternal twin, so there is always a chance we could end up with three. Either way, after we hopefully have another kid, I think the plan is to cut off every potential avenue for pregnancy.

    "I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."

    The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson

    Steam: Korvalain
  • shadowaneshadowane Registered User regular
    tbloxham wrote: »
    You know how I know sexism is alive and well in the country, my sons school is having a bake sale next month, and they are looking for volunteers to make cakes and cookies (or even to buy them). I live in a very liberal area of the country, but, the list for bake sale volunteers looks like this.

    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Me (Man)
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman

    I'm like, is this a list from 1955 of bake sale volunteers?

    Yeah this is often what our bake sale lists look like too. On top of that, even the volunteer lists often look like this.

    Rich on Beer - I talk about drinking beer. You read about it.
    OneAngryPossum
  • Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    Meanwhile, all the sports coaches for both the boys and girls teams in my area are guys. At least #3 has a female assistant coach this year, but it would be nice to see more.

    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
  • OneAngryPossumOneAngryPossum Registered User regular
    shadowane wrote: »
    tbloxham wrote: »
    You know how I know sexism is alive and well in the country, my sons school is having a bake sale next month, and they are looking for volunteers to make cakes and cookies (or even to buy them). I live in a very liberal area of the country, but, the list for bake sale volunteers looks like this.

    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Me (Man)
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman

    I'm like, is this a list from 1955 of bake sale volunteers?

    Yeah this is often what our bake sale lists look like too. On top of that, even the volunteer lists often look like this.

    Not to undervalue the contribution of men who do volunteer in these environments, but the level of positive feedback and outright praise I’ve received for doing so, while appreciated by my ego, is pretty comical. Especially when placed next to the level of recognition that the women doing these things for years prior to my arrival receive on the regular. Probably wise to cultivate further involvement from my demographic, but the disparity is just... blatant.

    Man changes a diaper he’s a hero, etc.

    mrpakuSyphonBluelonelyahavaDisruptedCapitalisthonovereXandarJansonCalica
  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    I took our youngest to the Dr one morning and was flabbergasted by the nurse being awe struck by a father bringing his child in. Got the same reaction when I took our oldest to the school book fair. Men being involved in their children's lives can't really be that shocking, can it?

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  • SeñorAmorSeñorAmor !!! Registered User regular
    tbloxham wrote: »
    You know how I know sexism is alive and well in the country, my sons school is having a bake sale next month, and they are looking for volunteers to make cakes and cookies (or even to buy them). I live in a very liberal area of the country, but, the list for bake sale volunteers looks like this.

    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Me (Man)
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman
    Woman

    I'm like, is this a list from 1955 of bake sale volunteers?

    You could take the same list and apply it to my kids' school's PTO.

    I don't get why more dads aren't involved in their kids' school.

    navgoose
  • Gabriel_PittGabriel_Pitt (effective against the Irish) Registered User regular
    edited September 2019
    Because by default, moms still make the majority of those who volunteer for thos type of thing, even barring external influencea.

    Gabriel_Pitt on
  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    I mean,

    wage gap is probably a big reason. Mom doesn't make as much as Dad so it's not as big a hit to the family finances for Mom to take the time.

    Also, Mom was probably taught how to bake, Dad was likely not, so there's a societal thing there.


    It's a weird thing I've noticed down here, Dads are FAR more involved with their kids down here than I remember seeing in the US. It's not unusual to see a dad in a front pack with a baby, or even wearing the baby in a fancy wrap. Or out shopping with the kids without mom in tow, or at the playgrounds with kids. It feels like there's a subtle shift happening where it's not really being commented on like it would have been.

    We're still a former British colony with a lot of that Victorian social baggage left engrained, but when your Prime Minister is a new mother and her partner is the one being stay at home Dad while she runs the country on the world stage, it suddenly feels very silly to comment about the Dad who drops the kid off at daycare or at school while on his way to work.

    It's a huge change and I"m seeing it mostly with those of us with kids around 5 or younger right now. So once they all start at school, it should get pretty intersting.

    CelestialBadgerOneAngryPossumJansonCalica
  • CelestialBadgerCelestialBadger Registered User regular
    "Being an engaged father" is starting to become part of the younger generation's model of manhood.

    Elvenshae38thDoeCalicaNitsua
  • MugsleyMugsley Registered User regular
    My wife has done a lot of this stuff because my work schedule the past 2 years has been pretty rough. I get in at 8 and if I leave before 5 it's a miracle.

    So my wife has to do most of the kid stuff, but we find ways I can help. I also attend every function I'm able to. I actually beat myself up pretty hard because I couldn't take time off last Friday to attend my daughter's award ceremony (each class gives awards every month for math, reading, and 'citizenship').

    I've made a lot of them, thank God.

    This schedule is tough for us but I'm no longer traveling, which made it even harder (I used to average 100 days per year)

  • navgoosenavgoose Registered User regular
    Every single elementary school teacher was female several select years for my kids.

    Even our daycare was better male/female staff balanced.

    kime
  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    There was one make teacher at daycare.

    But he left when his wife had s baby so he could be the start at home parent.

    There are no more male staff.

  • urahonkyurahonky Dayton, OHRegistered User regular
    Had the parent/teacher conference with my daughter's teacher yesterday. If you remember I was worried about the kids picking on her and stuff.

    Well the teacher told me that all the kids love her and she's a joy to have in class... The only thing she said is that she can be a little bossy, which isn't surprising! Apparently she's the teacher's pet, if the teacher is in the middle of doing something and a child needs help she usually sends my daughter over to support them.

    So it's just emotions that she's dealing with. I'm glad to hear that her teacher hasn't noticed anything upsetting.

    mrpakukimeLorekBrodyElvenshaelonelyahavaDisruptedCapitalistJaysonFourAimLoisLane38thDoeJansonNitsua
  • SummaryJudgmentSummaryJudgment The purity of angry tambourine. Registered User regular
    There was one make teacher at daycare.

    But he left when his wife had s baby so he could be the start at home parent.

    There are no more male staff.

    Daycare pays peanuts, so that's not surprising, unfortunately.

    Because survival is insufficient.
  • RickRudeRickRude Registered User regular
    So I just had my baby girl, and the question is, when do I get to sleep? I feel like something will happen to her if I close my eyes for a minute. Is this parenting, constant panic?

    lonelyahavaJaysonFourMugsleyJebus314kimeDisruptedCapitalistmatt has a problemspool32AimXandarurahonkyElvenshae38thDoeCapt HowdyMichaelLChonovereNobeard
  • SummaryJudgmentSummaryJudgment The purity of angry tambourine. Registered User regular
    RickRude wrote: »
    So I just had my baby girl, and the question is, when do I get to sleep? I feel like something will happen to her if I close my eyes for a minute. Is this parenting, constant panic?

    congrats!

    it's gonna be hard for awhile, but you and mom will gear into a rhythm and your kid gets stronger and smarter every day

    Because survival is insufficient.
    SleeplonelyahavaJaysonFourkimeAimElvenshae38thDoe
  • MugsleyMugsley Registered User regular
    edited October 2019
    RickRude wrote: »
    I feel like something will happen to her if I close my eyes for a minute. Is this parenting, constant panic?

    Yes. Until they hit 10 and you start to question why you let them live this long.

    Mugsley on
    spool32Mojo_JojoXandarurahonkyElvenshaeShadowfireCapt HowdyRickRudehonovereNobeard
  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    RickRude wrote: »
    So I just had my baby girl, and the question is, when do I get to sleep? I feel like something will happen to her if I close my eyes for a minute. Is this parenting, constant panic?

    It is. Except one night you'll go out for yourself, and come home after your SO has put the kid down, and you miss getting to say good night so bad.

    "I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."

    The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson

    Steam: Korvalain
    kimeDisruptedCapitalistAimmrpakuElvenshae38thDoeSleep
  • spool32spool32 Contrary Library Registered User regular
    edited October 2019
    Mugsley wrote: »
    RickRude wrote: »
    I feel like something will happen to her if I close my eyes for a minute. Is this parenting, constant panic?

    Yes. Until they hit 10 and you start to question why you let them live this long.

    You spend the first year trying to get them to walk and talk, and the next 17 trying to get them to sit still and be quiet.

    spool32 on
    kimeAimurahonkyMegafrostBrodyElvenshaeCapt HowdyBigityRickRude
  • HevachHevach Registered User regular
    RickRude wrote: »
    So I just had my baby girl, and the question is, when do I get to sleep? I feel like something will happen to her if I close my eyes for a minute. Is this parenting, constant panic?

    If baby is asleep, put her in a safe and secure spot. Then everyone drop what you're doing and lay down. Chores can wait. "Kids asleep now it's grown-up time," is for a couple years down the line. Now it's, "Holy shit a break sleep until its time to decide whose turn it is to get up with her." (Spoiler alert: it's everyone's turn every time).

    urahonkymrpakuDaenrisElvenshaeAimkimespool32RickRudeSleep
  • tbloxhamtbloxham Registered User regular
    I mean,

    wage gap is probably a big reason. Mom doesn't make as much as Dad so it's not as big a hit to the family finances for Mom to take the time.

    Also, Mom was probably taught how to bake, Dad was likely not, so there's a societal thing there.


    It's a weird thing I've noticed down here, Dads are FAR more involved with their kids down here than I remember seeing in the US. It's not unusual to see a dad in a front pack with a baby, or even wearing the baby in a fancy wrap. Or out shopping with the kids without mom in tow, or at the playgrounds with kids. It feels like there's a subtle shift happening where it's not really being commented on like it would have been.

    We're still a former British colony with a lot of that Victorian social baggage left engrained, but when your Prime Minister is a new mother and her partner is the one being stay at home Dad while she runs the country on the world stage, it suddenly feels very silly to comment about the Dad who drops the kid off at daycare or at school while on his way to work.

    It's a huge change and I"m seeing it mostly with those of us with kids around 5 or younger right now. So once they all start at school, it should get pretty intersting.

    I mean, my kids class is the kindergarten in a very liberal place where I routinely see dads out with their kids, wearing carriers (in fact, you al,ost never see a woman wearing a carrier other than for a very small baby) and all the signs which said to me “there will be a very even distribution of involvement in school” and while the dads are involved, it’s absolutely the case that everyone has stereotyped themselves into the most classic of roles, with men doing sports and outside cleaning as volunteering, and women doing baking and art. These liberal involved dads have still only roused themselves to like, 35% of the total effort. Clearly there’s a lot of compounding factors brought to us by our friends at the patriarchy, but there’s also a factor of women being happy to volunteer for all the things, and men being uncomfortable volunteering for things which are considered too feminine.

    "That is cool" - Abraham Lincoln
  • ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    I feel uncomfortable volunteering because I worry about looking like a creep. I've had a couple interactions with police in the past wondering why I'm hanging out "alone" at a park and had to introduce my daughter to them.

    WiiU: Windrunner ; Guild Wars 2: Shadowfire.3940 ; PSN: Bradcopter
  • Capt HowdyCapt Howdy Registered User regular
    RickRude wrote: »
    So I just had my baby girl, and the question is, when do I get to sleep? I feel like something will happen to her if I close my eyes for a minute. Is this parenting, constant panic?

    My oldest is 13 and I still check on him when he sleeps.

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  • tbloxhamtbloxham Registered User regular
    Shadowfire wrote: »
    I feel uncomfortable volunteering because I worry about looking like a creep. I've had a couple interactions with police in the past wondering why I'm hanging out "alone" at a park and had to introduce my daughter to them.

    Our friends at the patriarchy working hard to make sure that normal gender roles are thoroughly enforced. This story makes me very sad, because the only way to break these chains of behaviour is to act against social expectations, and here we see the literal police enforcing those behavior codes.

    "That is cool" - Abraham Lincoln
    CalicaNitsua
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