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Kids/Parenting: It’s fine, everything is fine.

1777880828386

Posts

  • urahonkyurahonky Registered User regular
    dennis wrote: »
    Man, I feel for you guys with the screen problems. I don't fault you at all, because parenting often sucks. But I've had to fight my wife a bit on this, even though technically we are both in agreement. I think she would give them a lot more screen time if I wasn't around to try to crack the whip. Even though she knows better, she will almost always sacrifice the long term for the short term when it comes to trying to get some peace and quiet.

    My wife is the opposite and it kills me. On the weekends they almost get no screen time because she doesn't like them on there... So we fight with them the whole weekend because of it lol. I'm not saying let them on it all day but we gotta have some time to ourselves in some form of quiet.

  • dennisdennis aka bingley Registered User regular
    urahonky wrote: »
    dennis wrote: »
    Man, I feel for you guys with the screen problems. I don't fault you at all, because parenting often sucks. But I've had to fight my wife a bit on this, even though technically we are both in agreement. I think she would give them a lot more screen time if I wasn't around to try to crack the whip. Even though she knows better, she will almost always sacrifice the long term for the short term when it comes to trying to get some peace and quiet.

    My wife is the opposite and it kills me. On the weekends they almost get no screen time because she doesn't like them on there... So we fight with them the whole weekend because of it lol. I'm not saying let them on it all day but we gotta have some time to ourselves in some form of quiet.

    It's really hard to know what to do, and everyone's situation is unique. The #1 goal of parenting is just to get through it.

    And it's not that we don't allow "screen time". My son spends hours a day on the computer. But he's very limited in what he can web browse to (I use Qustodio, which he hasn't figured out how to break. Yet.) And he has a very technical bent. So he spends those hours a day programming in Unreal Engine and sometimes Scratch (and a lot more of that a couple of years ago). As a programmer myself, I'm all for that. This is education, plain and simple.

    My daughter, on the other hand, gets more limited screen time because she hasn't shown an interest in programming (I have a course lined up for the summer so we'll see). She knows she can play 30 minutes of video games each day, and we watch the occasional nature documentary. When they have school and mom has to drive them together to/from, my daughter watches Dino Dana/Dan while my son plays gameboy, which keeps them from being at each others throats. And I'm okay with her watching and episode while my wife cuts her hair.

    But without more screen time, what she's done is become an avid reader. Kid will often spend multiple hours a day reading. I've tracked her reading in goodreads, and she's read hundreds of books between the ages of 5 and 7. I'm not sure she'd do that if she could fill those boring hours with tv.

    I wish they had more access to just go out and play in the woods all day like I did when I was a kid.

    ShadowfireMovitzurahonkykime
  • SleepSleep Registered User regular
    So my kid is only two, but for the most part we’ve tried to keep them away from screens. The only screen time they get is phone calls to see family we don’t live near, or seeing a picture, or watching my wife’s meetings on zoom when they like inconsolably need to be involved with work. I’ve even started to try showing them a tv show a couple times. I tried some good ol fragle rock the other day because we’ve had a very stressful and exhausting month where we’ve all been pretty ugly sick the whole time and they just didn’t really get into it. They looked a couple times, but were mostly running around playing the whole time it was on not paying attention at all. They’ve asked to watch again once or twice since then but it’s mostly at inconvenient times when they are like trying to push off a nap or bed time or like right before we’re heading out to do something or when we need them to be sitting at the table for a meal or their nebulizer.

    The flip side of this is we instead have to be constantly on while they are awake. Playing with toys with them or going for walks or reading for hours on end. Basically if they are awake one of us is doing mostly nothing, but playing with the kid in that timeframe.

    DisruptedCapitalistRed Raevyn
  • urahonkyurahonky Registered User regular
    dennis wrote: »
    urahonky wrote: »
    dennis wrote: »
    Man, I feel for you guys with the screen problems. I don't fault you at all, because parenting often sucks. But I've had to fight my wife a bit on this, even though technically we are both in agreement. I think she would give them a lot more screen time if I wasn't around to try to crack the whip. Even though she knows better, she will almost always sacrifice the long term for the short term when it comes to trying to get some peace and quiet.

    My wife is the opposite and it kills me. On the weekends they almost get no screen time because she doesn't like them on there... So we fight with them the whole weekend because of it lol. I'm not saying let them on it all day but we gotta have some time to ourselves in some form of quiet.

    It's really hard to know what to do, and everyone's situation is unique. The #1 goal of parenting is just to get through it.

    And it's not that we don't allow "screen time". My son spends hours a day on the computer. But he's very limited in what he can web browse to (I use Qustodio, which he hasn't figured out how to break. Yet.) And he has a very technical bent. So he spends those hours a day programming in Unreal Engine and sometimes Scratch (and a lot more of that a couple of years ago). As a programmer myself, I'm all for that. This is education, plain and simple.

    My daughter, on the other hand, gets more limited screen time because she hasn't shown an interest in programming (I have a course lined up for the summer so we'll see). She knows she can play 30 minutes of video games each day, and we watch the occasional nature documentary. When they have school and mom has to drive them together to/from, my daughter watches Dino Dana/Dan while my son plays gameboy, which keeps them from being at each others throats. And I'm okay with her watching and episode while my wife cuts her hair.

    But without more screen time, what she's done is become an avid reader. Kid will often spend multiple hours a day reading. I've tracked her reading in goodreads, and she's read hundreds of books between the ages of 5 and 7. I'm not sure she'd do that if she could fill those boring hours with tv.

    I wish they had more access to just go out and play in the woods all day like I did when I was a kid.

    Yeah my oldest (now 9) was super into reading (even read all of the Harry Potter books) but the past few months it's all been Minecraft for a majority of the day. Which... Of all the games at least it's Minecraft. And they are literally designing some really cool things.

  • ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    Jaina plays Pokemon Unite almost every day. 30-60 minutes, typically while I'm cooking dinner. We talk about her day, we play together, she gets distracted while I'm cooking, it's all good. She also watches shows with me sometimes, or by herself. Honestly, we don't care about screen time too much. Getting her to end the screen time is rough sometimes! She does not want to put the Switch down some days. But when she's off it and doing other things, she's totally fine, and sometimes getting her to stop those things is also hard.

    I dunno, I have bigger things to worry about than whether she's playing video games too much.

    WiiU: Windrunner ; Guild Wars 2: Shadowfire.3940 ; PSN: Bradcopter
    Kayne Red Robe
  • JebusUDJebusUD Adventure! Candy IslandRegistered User regular
    I'm not gonna lie. The pediatrician said keep it to less than 2 hours so I totally let these kids have 2 hours of screen time if they want.

    I find that it was getting out of control at around 4. Before he was in half day pre K. Then when that started everything got better and easier. If you have any early childhood education options in your area I highly recommend them. It was 2.5 hours 4 days a week and it totally changed his behavior for the better. And he was getting enough to do that he was ok with less TV or IPad time.

    And now we see on summer break before kindergarten and his behavior has been notably worse, but I find it easier if we have a planned activity to split up the day. Library time. An errand. Stuff like that.

    I write you a story
    But it loses its thread
    Cauld
  • kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    JebusUD wrote: »
    I'm not gonna lie. The pediatrician said keep it to less than 2 hours so I totally let these kids have 2 hours of screen time if they want.

    I find that it was getting out of control at around 4. Before he was in half day pre K. Then when that started everything got better and easier. If you have any early childhood education options in your area I highly recommend them. It was 2.5 hours 4 days a week and it totally changed his behavior for the better. And he was getting enough to do that he was ok with less TV or IPad time.

    And now we see on summer break before kindergarten and his behavior has been notably worse, but I find it easier if we have a planned activity to split up the day. Library time. An errand. Stuff like that.

    2 hours a day?

    Battle.net ID: kime#1822
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  • Kayne Red RobeKayne Red Robe Master of Magic ArcanusRegistered User regular
    I have a hard time caring about screen time, I spend most of my (much more limited now) leisure time playing video games, I'm not going to have much of a leg to stand on telling the kids they can't follow my example if they want to. Heck, I'm looking forward to being able to play Skylanders or whatever with them once they're older.

    Banzai5150AbsoluteZeroShadowfire
  • CauldCauld Registered User regular
    I think we've settled into a pretty good routine re: screen time. We try to keep it to 30 minutes at a time and 2x/day max, but are flexible if the situation warrants it. For our kids, once it gets longer than say 1.5 hrs they'll still be running around/screaming and arguing anyway. So, we try to put it on for a predetermined amount of time.

    wobblyheadedbob
  • AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    As a newbie parent - what's the big issue with too much screen time? Does it stunt your kid in some way? Bad for the eyes?

    cs6f034fsffl.jpg
  • kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    As a newbie parent - what's the big issue with too much screen time? Does it stunt your kid in some way? Bad for the eyes?

    It's generally less beneficial for their development than most other things they can do. They're not interacting with any real people, they aren't moving around for gross or fine motor skills, they aren't thinking very much. It's just a very passive activity compared to what they could be spending their time on.

    And of course not all screentime is equal, some things are definitely better/worse than others.

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    SleepElvenshaewobblyheadedbob
  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    And in that vein of it not all being equal

    Ellie can explain your entire immune system response because she watched videos to learn about it.

    She understood the concept of "stranger danger" and what to do in a fire because she watched videos.

    There is so much more that she has learned from animated informational shows them we have had time to teach her.

    It's not all bad. But there is a lot of shit out there too, so or still requires balance and paying attention and teaching along with the shows.

  • JebusUDJebusUD Adventure! Candy IslandRegistered User regular
    kime wrote: »
    JebusUD wrote: »
    I'm not gonna lie. The pediatrician said keep it to less than 2 hours so I totally let these kids have 2 hours of screen time if they want.

    I find that it was getting out of control at around 4. Before he was in half day pre K. Then when that started everything got better and easier. If you have any early childhood education options in your area I highly recommend them. It was 2.5 hours 4 days a week and it totally changed his behavior for the better. And he was getting enough to do that he was ok with less TV or IPad time.

    And now we see on summer break before kindergarten and his behavior has been notably worse, but I find it easier if we have a planned activity to split up the day. Library time. An errand. Stuff like that.

    2 hours a day?

    No more than was the recommendation. At least for the 5 year old. So usually sometime in the morning before lunch I let them watch some kids shoe for somewhere between 30 and an hour. Then sometime in the evening I usually let the little one watch cocomelon and the older one can play iPad. Same ish time. Some days it's more like an hour. Some days it's closer to 2.

    The younger one usually is over it sooner surprisingly. She will usually wander off early and try to help with food. The older one I need to give a warning before he is done or he gets mad. So I tell him he can finish his episode and try to keep him on short shows. I also find that sitting down and asking about the show and talking with him makes it okay, where as going "ok shows done now" is a disaster waiting to happen. Gotta engage with them for the transition.

    I write you a story
    But it loses its thread
  • R-demR-dem Registered User regular
    We have been very lucky in that Charlie gives her Kindle an hour tops before she wants to do something else, usually something active. She loves taking walks, going to parks, pools, playgrounds, etc. so we've never felt the need to police her screen time. If she was told she could spend all day outside but no Kindle, she'd accept in a heartbeat.

  • dennisdennis aka bingley Registered User regular
    And in that vein of it not all being equal

    Ellie can explain your entire immune system response because she watched videos to learn about it.

    She understood the concept of "stranger danger" and what to do in a fire because she watched videos.

    There is so much more that she has learned from animated informational shows them we have had time to teach her.

    It's not all bad. But there is a lot of shit out there too, so or still requires balance and paying attention and teaching along with the shows.

    Agreed.

    An hour of Mister Rogers can teach you to be kind and see someone different from yourself as the same.
    An hour of G.I. Joe (with commercials) will teach you that all you need to be happy is the USS Flagg aircraft carrier playset.

    I'm not saying I didn't watch and love those junk shows when I was growing up, but I also spent a lot of time outside. Kids today spend hardly any time outside in comparison.

  • dennisdennis aka bingley Registered User regular
    edited July 6
    I have a hard time caring about screen time, I spend most of my (much more limited now) leisure time playing video games, I'm not going to have much of a leg to stand on telling the kids they can't follow my example if they want to. Heck, I'm looking forward to being able to play Skylanders or whatever with them once they're older.

    I don't think that's quite a fair comparison. For one, kids need a lot more sleep, so any given hour spent on something is a larger chunk of their day. Plus, their brains are still developing and mine is basically a living fossil.

    And we're just also at different points in our lives. I'm not going to spend 7 hours of my day in school, but I'm sure going to be telling them they have to. They're welcome to spend hours and hours a day playing videogames once they've managed to lock down a good job and pay all their bills.

    dennis on
    kimewobblyheadedbob
  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    I would like my child to pretend to be sick.

    Just

    She's got a wet cough and a runny nose but no Covid but we're keeping her home from school and

    Sweet merciful one

    How in the hell did we all survive 4 months of lockdown and working from home without all collectively losing our goddamned minds?

    Oh

    Right

    Screen time.


    Child at least look miserable dammit! I took away her screen because of her absolutely atrocious behaviour last weekend.

    I am

    Deeply regretting this decision right this very second

    spool32DisruptedCapitalist
  • MovitzMovitz Registered User regular
    edited July 6
    dennis wrote: »
    And in that vein of it not all being equal

    Ellie can explain your entire immune system response because she watched videos to learn about it.

    She understood the concept of "stranger danger" and what to do in a fire because she watched videos.

    There is so much more that she has learned from animated informational shows them we have had time to teach her.

    It's not all bad. But there is a lot of shit out there too, so or still requires balance and paying attention and teaching along with the shows.

    Agreed.

    An hour of Mister Rogers can teach you to be kind and see someone different from yourself as the same.
    An hour of G.I. Joe (with commercials) will teach you that all you need to be happy is the USS Flagg aircraft carrier playset.

    I'm not saying I didn't watch and love those junk shows when I was growing up, but I also spent a lot of time outside. Kids today spend hardly any time outside in comparison.

    This.

    The advice I hear from leading pediatricians up here is loosely based on the WHO guidelines (
    0-2 years 0h, <5 years 1h, >5 years 2h) but also common sense.

    As in, what they watch is important and what they do when not in front of the screen is equally important. 3 h screen time and the rest playing in the woods is probably more healthy than 2 h of brain rot and then being ignored indoors for the rest of the day.

    Movitz on
    dennisJebusUD
  • kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    Speaking of screen time, daughter is sick at home and feeling icky; so she's watched more tv today than she normally gets in weeks lol. Shrug, you get benefits when you're sick

    Battle.net ID: kime#1822
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  • SharpyVIISharpyVII Registered User regular
    Three year olds questions this week:

    "Are we there yet" five minutes in to a four hour trip
    "Daddy why do you go to work"
    "What's in your neck"
    "What's in your elbow"
    "Daddy why do you go to work at night"
    "Can I drink all the ocean please"

    We met some Scottish friends this week, it's adorable hearing a two year old girl with a thick Scottish accent.

    kimeShadowfireMNC DoverElvenshaewobblyheadedbob
  • mxmarksmxmarks Registered User regular
    edited July 7
    Cross posting from the LEGO thread because it's probably more appropriate here.

    My 1 and a half year old is obsessed with cars and today saw the Lego van from Home Alone on my shelf and went nuts. He was obsessed. I made sure they all stayed in tact and we played with that van, Homer Simpsons car, the Weasleys car and the Night Bus.

    All was well until I remembered I have the Ice Cream truck from the lego movie Era.

    I found it way in the back of a shelf I haven't looked at in forever and pulled it out. After pushing it twice, he broke off one of the little bubbly ice cream pieces and shoved it in his mouth. I got him real quick and grabbed it and decided we were done with that vehicle since it had too many break off parts. When putting it away i noticed one of the cones in the back was ALSO missing its bubbly ice cream piece. I have no way of knowing if it wasn't there to begin with, since I haven't pulled that set out in probably 5 years, or if he snuck one by me.

    Google says I'll have my answer in his diaper in 1.7 days or less 😑

    mxmarks on
    PSN: mxmarks - WiiU: mxmarks - twitter: @ MikesPS4 - twitch.tv/mxmarks - "Yes, mxmarks is the King of Queens" - Unbreakable Vow
    Kayne Red Robe
  • tbloxhamtbloxham Registered User regular
    Movitz wrote: »
    dennis wrote: »
    And in that vein of it not all being equal

    Ellie can explain your entire immune system response because she watched videos to learn about it.

    She understood the concept of "stranger danger" and what to do in a fire because she watched videos.

    There is so much more that she has learned from animated informational shows them we have had time to teach her.

    It's not all bad. But there is a lot of shit out there too, so or still requires balance and paying attention and teaching along with the shows.

    Agreed.

    An hour of Mister Rogers can teach you to be kind and see someone different from yourself as the same.
    An hour of G.I. Joe (with commercials) will teach you that all you need to be happy is the USS Flagg aircraft carrier playset.

    I'm not saying I didn't watch and love those junk shows when I was growing up, but I also spent a lot of time outside. Kids today spend hardly any time outside in comparison.

    This.

    The advice I hear from leading pediatricians up here is loosely based on the WHO guidelines (
    0-2 years 0h, <5 years 1h, >5 years 2h) but also common sense.

    As in, what they watch is important and what they do when not in front of the screen is equally important. 3 h screen time and the rest playing in the woods is probably more healthy than 2 h of brain rot and then being ignored indoors for the rest of the day.

    Our main policy on screen time is that we only use screens in the house for about 2 hours max each normal day. No phones or iPad etc when we are out. Home TV is vaguely self limiting, as you need to leave the house.

    "That is cool" - Abraham Lincoln
    RichyJebusUD
  • urahonkyurahonky Registered User regular
    Yeah if we are at a restaurant I don't do the tablet thing even if it does make it much easier to keep them from going crazy. I don't want to have them in their teens sitting at the table with headphones on and doing something else. It's like the only time of the day where I put my foot down.

  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    If we're out at a place to eat and need to wait, I've got a deck of cards in my purse. Pull that out and we play Tug of war (war but better name kind of), Crazy 8s, or we work on her math skills.

    Photosaurus
  • AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    3 month old has a cold and is eating 1/2 or less what he normally does. We are in the waiting room waiting to see a pediatrician, but does anyone have experience with this? Starting to scare me.

    cs6f034fsffl.jpg
  • mxmarksmxmarks Registered User regular
    3 month old has a cold and is eating 1/2 or less what he normally does. We are in the waiting room waiting to see a pediatrician, but does anyone have experience with this? Starting to scare me.

    I hope everything is alright. I found when my little guy got sick, he ate way less as well, and mostly wanted to sleep. We offered up feeding/bottles whenever they were awake and made sure to monitor wet diapers to make sure things were still moving through the system, and once he got over the cold he was back to normal.

    You're doing the right thing by seeing the pediatrician, and hopefully it's just the cold making them not want to do much else other than sleep and get better.

    PSN: mxmarks - WiiU: mxmarks - twitter: @ MikesPS4 - twitch.tv/mxmarks - "Yes, mxmarks is the King of Queens" - Unbreakable Vow
    kimedennisRed RaevynlonelyahavaElvenshae
  • kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    Your pediatrician will know best. It's probably fine, kids eat less when they're sick. Big thing is dehydration, which you can measure via frequency of peeing. I forget what it would be at that age though

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  • knight11eknight11e Registered User regular
    Every time my older son started eating less out of the blue we knew a cold was coming shortly afterward. The pediatrician will be able to tell if there’s something more serious.

    Sleep
  • AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    Welp. The little guy's oxygen was at 84% so we got admitted to the ER and they want to keep him overnight. Doing a zillion tests and x-rays, he's on oxygen and iv fluids for dehydration. I am like a grown man trying not to cry in front of all these doctors.

    cs6f034fsffl.jpg
  • mxmarksmxmarks Registered User regular
    edited July 7
    So sorry to hear that - cry if you gotta!

    But also good for you for going to the doc and getting them on the path to getting better. Thinking of you and your family and looking forward to that "all better, time to head home" post in the future.

    mxmarks on
    PSN: mxmarks - WiiU: mxmarks - twitter: @ MikesPS4 - twitch.tv/mxmarks - "Yes, mxmarks is the King of Queens" - Unbreakable Vow
    honovereCarpydennisNobodykimeShadowfireSoggybiscuitlonelyahavaKayne Red RobeHappylilElfurahonkyFeloniousmozElvenshaeSatanic JesusBanzai5150Cauld
  • AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    Dr says RSV and possibly pneumonia or a collapsed lung (the x-ray isn't clear enough to tell which it is). They are going to start by treating for pneumonia and see if he improves. Mom and dad are a nervous wreck.

    Dr says almost 100% he caught it at daycare and now I feel super guilty about sending him to daycare so I can go to work. Making me reconsider giving up my career so I can keep him home and healthy.

    cs6f034fsffl.jpg
  • SoggybiscuitSoggybiscuit Tandem Electrostatic Accelerator Registered User regular
    Dr says RSV and possibly pneumonia or a collapsed lung (the x-ray isn't clear enough to tell which it is). They are going to start by treating for pneumonia and see if he improves. Mom and dad are a nervous wreck.

    Dr says almost 100% he caught it at daycare and now I feel super guilty about sending him to daycare so I can go to work. Making me reconsider giving up my career so I can keep him home and healthy.

    :bro:

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  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    I am so so so sorry that you are going through this.

    I wish there was more we could do over the internets, but please know that we're here. If you need to post a vent, then do so. We are here to listen, and to help if asked for.

    electricitylikesmeHappylilElfurahonkyAbsoluteZeroElvenshae
  • AiouaAioua Ora Occidens Ora OptimaRegistered User regular
    In the hospital, waiting for baby 2 to show up.

    Mostly, I would like a doctor to show so we can get admitted out of triage. The birthing rooms here are nice! This triage room not so much.

    life's a game that you're bound to lose / like using a hammer to pound in screws
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    bad things happen, no one knows why / the sun burns out and everyone dies
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  • HappylilElfHappylilElf Registered User regular
    Dr says RSV and possibly pneumonia or a collapsed lung (the x-ray isn't clear enough to tell which it is). They are going to start by treating for pneumonia and see if he improves. Mom and dad are a nervous wreck.

    Dr says almost 100% he caught it at daycare and now I feel super guilty about sending him to daycare so I can go to work. Making me reconsider giving up my career so I can keep him home and healthy.

    If it helps at all that's... kind of not an option.

    He's going to get sick again. That's what tiny/small humans do. Hopefully not to this degree of course! But it's going to happen.

    Also very importantly? And I can't stress this enough- Know that it's not your fault he got sick this time.

    lonelyahavaschussdennisurahonkyMNC DovermxmarksAimadejaankimechromdomAbsoluteZeroCarpyElvenshaeSatanic Jesus
  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    Dr says RSV and possibly pneumonia or a collapsed lung (the x-ray isn't clear enough to tell which it is). They are going to start by treating for pneumonia and see if he improves. Mom and dad are a nervous wreck.

    Dr says almost 100% he caught it at daycare and now I feel super guilty about sending him to daycare so I can go to work. Making me reconsider giving up my career so I can keep him home and healthy.

    If it helps at all that's... kind of not an option.

    He's going to get sick again. That's what tiny/small humans do. Hopefully not to this degree of course! But it's going to happen.

    Also very importantly? And I can't stress this enough- Know that it's not your fault he got sick this time.


    because it's important enough for lime

    wobblyheadedbobKayne Red RobedennisMNC DoverAimFeloniousmozAbsoluteZerochromdomCarpyElvenshaeSatanic JesuselectricitylikesmeHappylilElf
  • tbloxhamtbloxham Registered User regular
    edited July 8
    Dr says RSV and possibly pneumonia or a collapsed lung (the x-ray isn't clear enough to tell which it is). They are going to start by treating for pneumonia and see if he improves. Mom and dad are a nervous wreck.

    Dr says almost 100% he caught it at daycare and now I feel super guilty about sending him to daycare so I can go to work. Making me reconsider giving up my career so I can keep him home and healthy.

    You don’t ‘not catch diseases’ by not going to daycare as a child. You just catch them later when you go to school.
    Dr says RSV and possibly pneumonia or a collapsed lung (the x-ray isn't clear enough to tell which it is). They are going to start by treating for pneumonia and see if he improves. Mom and dad are a nervous wreck.

    Dr says almost 100% he caught it at daycare and now I feel super guilty about sending him to daycare so I can go to work. Making me reconsider giving up my career so I can keep him home and healthy.

    If it helps at all that's... kind of not an option.

    He's going to get sick again. That's what tiny/small humans do. Hopefully not to this degree of course! But it's going to happen.

    Also very importantly? And I can't stress this enough- Know that it's not your fault he got sick this time.


    because it's important enough for lime

    Also, the fact that your doctor even brought it up is ripe with presumption about how your family should have lived. Your child wouldn't have not gotten sick if they had stayed home. They just might have gotten sick at another time. You cannot hide for your whole life from disease.

    tbloxham on
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  • AiouaAioua Ora Occidens Ora OptimaRegistered User regular
    Aioua wrote: »
    In the hospital, waiting for baby 2 to show up.

    Mostly, I would like a doctor to show so we can get admitted out of triage. The birthing rooms here are nice! This triage room not so much.

    Baby is now about 8 hours and 30 mins old.

    This really is great and it has been a much less traumatic birth experience for my wife.

    But also oh good lord I am scared about how things will go with the toddler.

    It's gonna be so much work. So much!

    life's a game that you're bound to lose / like using a hammer to pound in screws
    fuck up once and you break your thumb / if you're happy at all then you're god damn dumb
    that's right we're on a fucked up cruise / God is dead but at least we have booze
    bad things happen, no one knows why / the sun burns out and everyone dies
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  • AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    After a harrowing couple of days our 3 month old little trooper is finally maintaining good oxygen levels all on his own and he seems like a happy little dude, aside from the tons of mucus still clogging up his airways. They are getting ready to discharge him and send us home with a bunch of meds that he'll have to be on for a while.

    I am super nervous about him back sliding and having to go back to the hospital. I am not any type of expert but his chest xray looked super gnarly to me, the upper right lobe of his lung was solid white, so it almost has to be totally full of pus. I really wish they would take another xray to check for progress, but they won't since his symptoms improved. I am also super nervous to send him back to daycare.

    But I am so glad I get to take him home today. That's a great feeling. Although he will probably miss all the attention, we had crowds of med students coming in every day to check him out and they all just adored him.

    The stress of all this has been ridiculous. Thanks for all the kind words here, definitely helped me keep some perspective and get through this without going too crazy. Fingers crossed we don't wind up back in hospital any time soon.

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  • dennisdennis aka bingley Registered User regular
    I'm so glad.

    One thing no one ever told me going into parenting (and, oops, we forgot to tell you): you know how video game bosses have that weird spot on their belly, or on their back, or the end of their nose or whatever and you just have to bonk that three times? Their ridiculously weak point?

    That's what having a child is.

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