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Secret Satans 2019 - Perfect gifting! See you next year!

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Posts

  • NaphtaliNaphtali Hazy + Flow SeaRegistered User regular
    @Lasbrook you're a madman! This is too much! It's wonderful! Thank you!

    Oh right, I guess I should show what happened.

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    [menacing boxes intensifies]

    Box #1:

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    "Will it blend?" Oh, so...

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    A Kitchen-aid Blender! Now I can blend everything! Food related, that is.

    Box #2:

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    Okay, you got me. I have no idea. But the first note was about baking, so...

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    "Do not open?" Uhhhhh.... that's kind of the point, isn't?

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    A ceramic baking dish! This is great, my current 9 x 13 dish has really low sides and sometimes can bubble over. It's perfect!

    Lasbrook, thank you again so much for all three gifts. You've out done yourself.

    Steam | Nintendo ID: Naphtali | Wish List
  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    So I'm hanging out at home, making a grilled cheese, you know, like you do

    and suddenly there's a ringing at the doorbell, and when I go to open the door, there is no one there, but there is a large envelope
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    Excitedly, I rip open the package and behold...

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    MONSTER HUNTER ART PRINTS

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    A VERY COOL DOOM ART PRINT

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    AND EVEN SOME BONUS ART!

    Since I didn't order this for myself and my wife didn't either, I think this can only be Satan's work! Thanks, Satan!

  • NaphtaliNaphtali Hazy + Flow SeaRegistered User regular
    Crowsmack posters are the best

    Steam | Nintendo ID: Naphtali | Wish List
  • CristovalCristoval Registered User regular
    Delivery on a Sunday? The LORDs day?? Truly the work of Belzebub himself.

  • Goose!Goose! That's me, honey Show me the way home, honeyRegistered User regular
    Satan, the Fates tried to intervene in your dark work, but they should know better that your will is stronger.
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    During my trip this weekend, I was greeted by a box! I opened the box and found...

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    A note! Telling me the deed had been done again, but was not yet complete.

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    Further in the box, a bag! Inside of which was

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    A closet organizer! Which is perfect because I needed a thing like this. Thanks Satan!

    Sorry I'm just opening this now, Satan, but my amazon wishlist was still set to my old address in New York! I only just fixed it earlier today, and the promised part 3 just arrived after I left NY so I won't see it until the week of December 23rd. Sorry again!

  • DrZiplockDrZiplock Registered User regular
    Oh my sweet sweet Dark Lord....

    I have received your gifts and welcomed them into my home. In order to best pay honor and tribute to your glory I want to put them into use immediately so that I may share with the world you have bestowed upon me. However, I, being the weak servant that I am, have fallen a bit ill...I know, Lord, I know, pestilence and disease is kind of one of your things and oh hey, how am I embracing Satan if I'm not embracing his many creations yadda yadda yadda. Look, I didn't ask for this meat sack that you stuffed me in. Maybe wait for the hardware upgrades next time as opposed to pushing software onto a frame that couldn't handle it.

    ...anyway...

    I'll post pictures soon-ish.

    xoxo - Ziplock

  • BucketmanBucketman Call me SkraggRegistered User regular
    Hmm it seems it was my Destiny (2, Upgraded edition) to have @Moriveth as my Satan. Hail to you good completely human sir! I am appreciative of all the lovely gifts, including this gift of Destiny 2 with all the expansions! I shall go do shoot!

  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    I need to give more stuff to my person

    It's been a crazy month

  • BucketmanBucketman Call me SkraggRegistered User regular
    I haven't sent anything to mine yet. But in a few days theres a sale on internet things from the digital store so I hope they are prepared

  • Blackhawk1313Blackhawk1313 Demon Hunter for Hire Time RiftRegistered User regular
    Feels weird not seeing any chains being laid out yet.

  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    Bucketman wrote: »
    Hmm it seems it was my Destiny (2, Upgraded edition) to have @Moriveth as my Satan. Hail to you good completely human sir! I am appreciative of all the lovely gifts, including this gift of Destiny 2 with all the expansions! I shall go do shoot!

    Yay! I'm glad you got it. And if you ever wanna play together, hit me up (this gift may have been slightly self-serving, so I have more folks to play with on PC)

  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    This time two years ago, if anyone remembers, my car was broken into and the gift I was sending to my Satanee was stolen.

    It was awful and terrible and the only thing that made it ok is you all saved the day offering to send me money to replace it. I vehemently refused, because I'm terrible at accepting help, and Sagat Satan just went ahead and sent me a Amazon gift card I couldn't refuse. It was wonderful and I'm still super grateful.

    Anyway this morning I was planning on driving across the border to ship my gift to my Satanee and after getting my son ready and making sure we had our passports we went out to the car and

    the rear passenger door was hanging open and the inside had clearly been tossed.

    Now I'd somewhat learned my lesson and don't keep valuable things in the car anymore, despite living in a safer neighborhood and having a more secure car this shit still happens, evidently, and luckily my Satanee's gift was still inside the house. They didn't steal the two most valuable things in the car (the car seat and the stroller), all they got away with was my 12 year old prescription Ray Bans and about 4 bucks worth of change from the ashtray.

    Never the less it dredged up some shitty memories and upset me a bit. It's a real violation of someone's private space and feels super gross, in case it's never happened to you and you were wondering. After taking stock and figuring out what was missing I figured we might as well get back in the car and make that border run.

    I was about 30 minutes into the drive when I realized...
    #pipe wrote:
    luckily my Satanee's gift was still inside the house.

    so anyway we turned around and came home. Today is a wash. Let's make sure the car is securely locked and reevaluate tomorrow.

  • SkeithSkeith Registered User regular
    THEY HAVE STRICKEN AGAIN
    I came home from work to a big box on my kitchen table.

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    I have an order of decidedly weeaboo-ish things coming, but it wasn't placed on Amazon.

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    I assume imgur will correct the orientation later, but for now: "Hi Skeith, I figured it would actually be pretty mean (even for me) if I asked you about magic and then just got you a coin. Commander is one of my favourite formats! I hope you enjoy it! Satan"

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    Four recent Commander decks!

    Your timing is spectacular Satan, I'm doing a MTG program at work tomorrow night and I can bring a couple of these by as examples! Thank you very much! I'm still going to try and figure out who you are, but I haven't decided if that spelling of favorite is a red herring or not.

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  • TonkkaTonkka Some one in the club tonight Has stolen my ideas.Registered User regular
    I was checking shipping today, and the most important part of the giftening is estimated to arrive sometime between the 18th and. . . the fucking 26th.

    Remember kids, it's important to review these kinds of details before you go and confirm your order.

    Steam: evilumpire Battle.net: T0NKKA#1588 PS4: T_0_N_N_K_A Twitter Art blog/Portfolio! Twitch?! HEY SATAN Shirts and such
  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2019
    I sent something to my Satan which advertised a 3-5 day delivery turnaround
    but they forgot to mention this estimate didn't include 3 days of 'processing'
    and of course it's business days only
    and they don't provide tracking information

    will it arrive? who knows!!

    tynic on
  • KetBraKetBra Dressed Ridiculously Registered User regular
    I can't remember what I originally said, but Satan I will be in town this week, not here next week, and back (probably mostly?) the week afterwards and henceforth

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  • MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    I probably should let my Satan know I will be out of town from Tuesday of next week through to late Thursday

  • CristovalCristoval Registered User regular
    edited December 2019
    I'm waiting on one last piece before sending off the final Parcel that was Promised, which should arrive by end of today. It may or may not reach you by Christmas! Will I pay for expedited shipping to the US?? Probably (not)??!

    Cristoval on
  • TofystedethTofystedeth Registered User regular
    I have begun compiling the various bits and bobs of my gift. Actually I began a week or so ago, just wanted to assure my Satanee I have not forgotten about them.

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  • VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Oh yeah, Satan I forgot to mention I’ll be out of town for a couple of weeks from the 31st until the 14th.

  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    lol oh look we're somehow a week farther down on the calendar than I thought

    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited December 2019

    #pipe on
  • KetBraKetBra Dressed Ridiculously Registered User regular
    edited December 2019
    I got some switch games from my Satan today! I will post more later today when I can actually show the games!

    Thanks Satan ur the best!

    KetBra on
    KGMvDLc.jpg?1
  • LalaboxLalabox Registered User regular
    Also, i want to apologise to my satanee. I have just been a mess these past few months and haven't gotten my shit together.

    I will be sending out sone stuff soon, but i'm very sorry that it looks like i won't be able to get anything to you before christmas

  • StraightziStraightzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User regular
    A box has arrived that I did not order.

    It is... mysterious, and perhaps has a touch of brimstone to it, but it also has nothing that might identify it as, well, being from anyone in any particular way.

    Of course I would never demand the devil reveal himself, but I am wondering if I should, well, open things properly, or just leave this as a mystery from some other admirer.

  • Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    Hey

    Hey @Lalabox

    Hugs my friend, from across the water

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    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
  • KetBraKetBra Dressed Ridiculously Registered User regular
    Everyone, check out how fucking cool Satan is:

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    They got me the two Switch games that have been near the top of my 'to-buy' list for months! Yay!

    Hail Satan!

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  • VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Aw yisss, I have been struck by a devil

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    Thank you so much, @Bucketman

    As requested, here is a picture of the noodles after I said that they couldn't have a treat because they'd literally just had one already

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  • Lost SalientLost Salient blink twice if you'd like me to mercy kill youRegistered User regular
    IT'S YOU

    YOU ARE THE MONSTER

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    "Sandra has a good solid anti-murderer vibe. My skin felt very secure and sufficiently attached to my body when I met her. Also my organs." HAIL SATAN
  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    edited December 2019
    Woops this is the Satans thread not the PC games thread, excuse me

    Brovid Hasselsmof on
  • BucketmanBucketman Call me SkraggRegistered User regular
    Huzza! You got them! As I said, I will be sending you some physical things but as we live on opposite shores I do not know when these would arrive, so I wanted to make sure you had something to occupy your time until the holiday!

  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    edited December 2019
    I have received some infernal literature
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    A book about the ecology of hedgerows, which is 100% my shit, and two colourful volumes that I guess I'll share with my nephews. Though they might have to pry the dinosaur book from my claws.

    The dinosaur book will be especially useful as when I collected the 3 year old from nursery the other day he pointed at a picture of a stegasaurus and told me it was a triceratops, and refused to accept my correction. So now I can shove this book right in his stupid face! Ha!

    There was no note but as I didn't order them myself I must accuse Satan. And apologies Satan, they actually arrived a few days ago, but because I had ordered some xmas gifts from the same place I didn't bother opening them as I am lazy and do all my wrapping last minute, until I noticed yesterday that there were more packages than I expected.

    Thank you dark lord, and a dribbly handshake on behalf of my nephews.

    Brovid Hasselsmof on
  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    I need to start using my Steam again

  • XaquinXaquin Right behind you!Registered User regular
    When does the holiday consolidation begin?

    I always love that

  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    Xaquin wrote: »
    When does the holiday consolidation begin?

    I always love that

    Pretty soon usually

  • MadicanMadican No face Registered User regular
    There's a number of threads meandering past 100 pages waiting for it

  • PinfeldorfPinfeldorf Yeah ZestRegistered User regular
    You're meandering past 100 pages.

    Fuckin' got 'em!

  • Goose!Goose! That's me, honey Show me the way home, honeyRegistered User regular
    Satan, your machinations are inthwartable, regardless of how the Fates continue to try
    This time, the package was not sent to my old address, as the Amazon wishlist thing did, but still almost were returned to sender, because the people who work in the office of this apartment complex are shitty and want my $50/year to store things in a locker I do not need. Since I 'opted out' of their locker scam (opting out being the language they used), they told the mail carrier to just bring it back to the post office. Luckily, my mother happened to be home when the mail carrier arrived at the mailboxes and intercepted the package from his truck. Fuck this place and their shitty office staff, I can't wait to move. Anynway, onto the good part


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    The package! Pixelation! Let's see what's inside

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    First, a note! The third and final gifting! Warmth (with secrets!)! Munchies! Flavor! This gift has everything! Thanks very much, @N1tSt4lker you are awesome!

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    A scarf! The secret is:
    It has a pocket!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=brRRi8_tCXc

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    Better view of the scarf

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    Munchies! And tucked underneath (which I didn't take a picture of I guess because I dumb) was a big ole can of Cajun seasoning! Flavor indeed!

    Thank you so very much, Satan N1tst4lker! You rock!

  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    @N1tSt4lker did you sew that scarf?! I bet I know the pattern you used if you did. What an awesome set of gifts!

  • N1tSt4lkerN1tSt4lker Registered User regular
    @Janson I did sew that scarf! Are you also a denizen of the sewing seas?

    @Goose! You are welcome, and I hope you enjoy all the things!

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